Should I really feel this way?

Everyone has bad days. It's what you do with tomorrow that defines you as a person. You may find it hard to believe, but not every human is wicked!

Oh yeah, when you wake up tomorrow, just force yourself to smile and tell yourself it's going to be a great day. You'd be surprised how something so simple can affect your entire life.
Trust me, I know how bad things may seem. I had the worst June ever. It's like someone wrote down a series of horrible things that can happen to one person and it came true in my life.
But hey, everything is fine now! It's all about experiencing and learning how it makes you feel. How you will never wish to hurt others how you've been hurt. You can take this situation and grow from it more than you can possibly imagine right now.

[edit on 10-8-2009 by Bringmeachair]

This song, soothes the soul also

reply to post by LiveForever8


You know what I abhor - I mean really it disgusts me? People who like to get in "pissing contests" over who is more miserable. Look, we can all certainly find MANY awful things in life that might help us appreciate the things we _DO_ have - but it does not justify lessening the value of someone else's pain.

AND - how heartless and cruel to add even more wounding to someone? How do you know your self-righteous comment might not just be the thing that pushes said person past some edge? C'mon!

It IS horrible that children starve all over this planet every day or that men, woman and children in the 10's of thousands were machete'd to death in Rwanda, or the thousands of women that are raped each month, or the 1000's of young lives taken as a result of drunk driving each year, or the millions killed in an earthquake, hurricane or other natural disaster. But that DOES not invalidate an individual's pain or suffering.

I cry when I see the horrific pictures coming out of Iraq, for example - I feel badly for those people (and largely powerless to help), but I ALSO feel awful and (yes, a bit sorry for myself) when my husband says something particularly unkind in a moment of pique' or anger. THE TWO do not cancel each other out for pete's sake.
----------
Now, to the original poster. I can imagine how awful you must feel - I think many of us have been given the impression by others that we are somehow less/don't matter. And it's simply NOT true, but it is difficult to see that at times and it can become a fatalistic, self-fulfilling prophecy at times as well. But see, you identifying that very insightful bit tells me something about you already - that you're bright and intelligent and that you THINK about things. So take that and build on it! Sometimes it is baby steps at first, especially when you are in a seemingly hostile and uncaring environment every day. Just try this - PICK ONE thing you do like about YOU - and focus on that. Let yourself appreciate YOU for what you DO like about you. And trust me, as awful as people and the 'world' can seem - its NOT ALL like that - you'll be amazed at how many really decent people there are out there. Most of them just tend not to be high profile or needy for attention - so we don't see them on the news or on forums like this. *grin* (Part of that was meant tongue in cheek before anyone blows a blood vessel!)

Anyway, hang in there - I know its tough! Probably equally important to finding one thing WORTH caring about (particularly in yourself) is also trying to use new sources where more "positive" people might be to make a friend or two that you can relate to/enjoy being with who are going to focus on more positives than negatives.

Sending you a virtual *hug*. Yup, the world sucks and a lot of people are very nasty - but remember this, they are nasty largely because inside they are as unhappy or even more miserable than you are. But I get from reading your post that while you feel hopeless right now - YOU have the potential to CHANGE that, not deny it or hide from it. Hang in there!

I don't know you, but I just feel compelled to add my voice to the chorus wishing you the best. People on here seem to love you, and I'm sure your children do...nothings better than that, IMO...Right there is a relationship that YOU are responsible for not messing up, that can sustain you...again I have to say you have every reason to feel the way you do, but also even more of a reason (your children) for doing your best to overcome these feelings.
I should add, my life is pretty messed up as well (I won't go into it) but I hang on for my kiddo. And she is more than worth it! You can be the parent yours weren't. That in itself is pretty sweet.

I can't tell you how many times I've felt the same way. You need to have something to look forward to. That's all I can tell you. Whether its getting your G.E.D. going to college where people are more mature and don't call others names or finding your true calling in life. Find that one thing to look forward to and go for it. I always found that reading a good book helps me, because it helps drift me into a different world. www.fmylife.com

Try cats. They give you unconditional love.

It's best to raise a young cat and give them extreme amounts of love and attention. They will adore you. Right now my cat is sitting in my lap. He follows me around the house and sleeps on my legs.

Seriously, if you are done with humans then try cats. It's worth it.

reply to post by LiveForever8


I agree with your premise for posting the pic.

All too often people look at their lives in a self serving comparative competition...with a poor me attitude because of their circumstances.

OP, to you I say the only person you ever need to worry about is yourself. To give a rats behind about what others think and say to you, or do to you will only lead you down a path of forsakenness.

Surely you will have other swho look down upon you. And do all the bull# things people will do to each other. Know it. Learn from it, and let that # go in one ear and out the other...As long as you are moving forward you will be fine. Never give up.

Take heed the message in that picture. Be greatful for what you have but always strive to be better than the bloke next to you. Dont be cut throat but be a hard ass...

I'm afraid I don't buy that argument, about how, because there are people who are so worse off, we should be more grateful, in other words, grateful by comparison, to how worse it could be. That's not the solution, and it's helpful only to a point. There can be no joy for me, that I am not a starving African child, that just doesn't compute.

The OP's post mirrors so well my mood of the past few days. The cause, the specifics all different, but the emotion was very familiar. I suggest seeking professional help. This sounds like clinical depression, and advice from an internet forum isn't going to be enough.

Maybe the lurking I've done here isn't doing me any favors. This isn't exactly sunshine central. Not having a job, being single, believing that I'm too old despite being actually quite young.

Nothing is going to seem positive right now. Thinking about people who have it worse just make life itself seem more futile. You can't be rational in such a state.

There are people in this world who seem to have every reason to be unhappy, and yet they are happy. I've been thinking about sources of happiness a lot recently. I was looking for something to convince me that life is not futile.

They've got somebody watching their backs. That's all. When you can't trust you can't have that.

reply to post by ldyserenity


Don't give up. Give them hell.

You give them hell by showing them you are above it. Bullying tactics only work if someone allows themselves to be bullied.

Look Kiddo,

OP you have a problem.

Your problem in this life is not the humans that have hurt you. Your problem is you have let them get to you.

You want to crawl into a hole and die. WHY?

Because of high school in America? Dude High Schools in America are nothing but ghetto, gangsta, trench coat mafia generators. Don't fall for it!!

Your out, you made it through, now think of all the great people you can meet in this world.

Think of all the cute prostitutes you could do in Japan, all the sweet islands you could visit, the hills of the Himalayas and all the crazy jobs you could take while trying to get to you next destination.

Think of all the great cultures and languages and foods you could experience.

Your a free man in a very large world. Don't through it away because you have only experienced the destitute and idiocy of High School in the US.

TA!!
Izzy.

You are your own light to yourself,
You are beautiful,
You are and will be successful, loved and full of brightness and life for ever
----------------------
P.S. This is self fulfilling prophecy.
P.S.S. You are everything and everything is possible.

Also to answer your question OP...

No. You should not feel this way. Don't let yourself feel this way.

You owe it to yourself to pick yourself up b the bootstraps and prove all your doubters wrong.

Good luck

If you let the outer dictate the inner, you are a slave of the phenomenal

I'm sensing that you may possibly have some issues with gratitude. Here is something that I hope may help you to get things into perspective...

If you have money in the bank, in your wallet, and spare change in a dish someplace ... you are among the top 8% of the worlds wealthy.

If you have food in the refrigerator, clothes on your back, a roof overhead and a place to sleep ... you are richer than 75% of this world.

If you are not paralyzed from your waist down, there are six million people in the U.S. alone who wish they were you.

If you woke up this morning with more health than illness ... you are more blessed than the millions who will not survive this week.

If you have never experienced the danger of battle, the loneliness of imprisonment, the agony of torture, or the pangs of starvation... you are ahead of 500 million people in the world.

If you can attend a church meeting without fear of harassment, arrest, torture, or death ... you are more blessed than three billion people on Earth.

If your parents are still alive and still married you are very rare.

The next time you feel like whining, remember that your garbage disposal probably eats better than 30 percent of the people in the world.

Ungrateful people are ingrates who usually end up bitter and alone. Most often they are cynical to borderline pessimist or let alone misanthropes who only see the bad things in life. Their pitiful, sour perspective reverberates through their entire being mentally, emotionally and physically. We should all be thankful that we are waking up everyday with the free will to choose. To be thankful or unthankful for the things in our lives, the persons who love us and all the blessings that God has bestowed upon us. A choice that ultimately determines whether we get to be “bitter” or ”better in this meager existence!”

Long ago, there was a British family who went to Scotland for a summer vacation. The mother and father were looking forward to enjoying the beautiful Scottish countryside with their young son. A day went by and the son wandered off all by himself and got into trouble. As he ventured through the woods, he came across an abandoned swimming hole, and as most boys his age do, he took off his clothes and jumped in.

The boy was totally unprepared for what happened next. Before he had the time to enjoy the pool of water, he was seized by a horrible attack of cramps. He began calling for help! He was fighting a losing battle with the cramps to stay afloat.

Luckily, a farm boy was working in a nearby field. When he heard the cries for help, he dove in and brought the English boy to safety.

Of course, the father, whose son had been rescued, was extremely grateful. The next day, he went to meet the youth who had saved his son’s life. As the two talked, the Englishman asked the boy what he planned to do with his future.

The boy answered, “Oh I suppose I’ll be a farmer like my father.”

“Is there something else you’d rather do?” he asked.

“Sure!” answered the boy. “I’ve always wanted to be a doctor. But, we are poor people and we could never afford to pay for my education.”

“Never mind that,” said the Englishman. “Leave that up to me. You’ll have your heart’s desire and you will study medicine. You make your plans, and I’ll take care of the costs.”

So, the boy did grow up and became a doctor. But wait ... there is more.

Years later, in December of 1943, Winston Churchill became very ill with pneumonia while in North Africa. Word was sent to Sir Alexander Fleming, who had discovered the new wonder drug, penicillin, to come immediately. Flying in from England, Dr. Fleming administered his new drug to the ailing prime minister. In doing so, he saved Churchill’s life for the second time. For it was the boy, Winston Churchill, whom Alexander Fleming had rescued from the swimming hole so many years before.

If not for the gratitude of Winstons father, shown to a boy who had nothing but dreams, countless lives would have been lost.

Be grateful every day you wake up, looking with your eyes, and standing with your legs, and if you are lucky enough to have someone who loves you - that is reason enough to smile... Because it is the little things in life that really are important.

Originally posted by LiveForever8
[atsimg]http://files.abovetopsecret.com/images/member/874a5532b42c.jpg[/atsimg]



Get over yourself.

So easy to say, harder to make it happen.. If someone has depression (and I'm saying if), ability to see an alternative perspective can be very difficult. As it goes with most internal experiences, one has to go through such an experience to fully understand.


To the OP, if you want, you can have a happier life. But if you truly want change, you have to will it into your life. And you have to believe that you will achieve it. Not just that you can achieve it, but that you will make it happen.
I know it may be difficult, but seeing everything from a different perspective will help immensely. As soon as you make the conscious choice to bring change into your life, and embrace that change, things will flow again. And I can say that honestly because I've been there.

I truly want the best for you.

Unless our minds are stable and calm, no matter how comfortable our physical condition may be, they will give us no pleasure. Therefore, the key to a happy life, now and in he future, is to develop a happy mind.

Dalai Lama

[edit on 10/8/09 by pretty_vacant]

My husband's parents told him when he was 18, "Sorry, no college fund. You wanna go to school kid? Get up and work. " and... that's just what he did. He worked his way through. He didn't sit around hating his parents because they didn't pay his way. My parents never saw college as a priority either.

The only person who is responsible for your life, welfare, and happiness is yourself. The only person who is going to get you where you want to go is you.

Now, as for social networking sites, I deleted mine a long time ago. They all seem so fake and I don't care to sit around and find out what my friend's status is all day, nor do I like blogging that much.

Good luck. You are the master of your own destiny.

exuse me if im being raw.. but f*ck this forum, f*ck your parents (not meant in disrespectfull way), # your friends and everyone you know, cause at the end of the day, the only person YOU have around is YOU. Other people dont decide who YOU are, and the way YOU should live your life. Thats one thing life has taught me, giving a sh*t about what people say is mostly negativ, cause then you are changing your way of behaviour for another person that should have absolutly no control over your life

instead of stopping loving life, stop loving the people who has never showed you love. Maybe you are searching for love with people who dont love you

the truth is, nobody cares more for you, than they do for themselves, so you should start looking out for yourself and say f*ck everybody who treated you wrong, turn the tabels.. people who tell you that you're never gonna be anything, are all people who never made it to "something.. Players are all people who got played, meaning they never did what they wanted to and still mad about it.. dont end up like one of them..

find something in your life that you love, music, sports, a job, anything.. like you said, you have been robbed of all the positive in your life.. its bout time to take it back

speaking from personal experience, life is much easier when you stop givin f*ck.. but, staying positive is very important

This always cheers me up..

www.youtube.com...

When i feel just like you. one thing i always think about is...

Im greatfull i have the chance to even be angry

get wat am sayin?

reply to post by ldyserenity


I would have posted something similar, but the fear of people agreeing with me would have pushed me over the edge.

My psychologist today helped me more than I expected.

and that was bloody hard.

don't feel this way alone. believe it or not, a psychologist who you feel comfortable with, CAN help.

doesn't fix things, but helps.. and I think we have a lot in common.