Should I really feel this way?

reply to post by Asktheanimals


Truly, it's a sickness, I think and it's spreading...I am just wondering why it's getting worse every generation and people really beleive we're reaching a new wonderful phase. Well, I don't see it, because there's less and less of the good people on Earth, some are just suffering themselves and are not good nor bad, just trying to survive; some are good, most are bad and some of the good people are becoming infected with the bad...I feel infected, I really do. I don't know how else to explain it. With all the therapists we have it should be getting better, or is it just the wrong people taking their kids to therapy? If I was a christian I would think the devil is winning!

[edit on 9-8-2009 by ldyserenity]

Wow honestly your post brought tears to my eyes. I myself very recently have been feeling the same way. I have done so much for others and all I get in return is nothing, not even respect. I went through the same crap with my mother and I still dont talk to her. I have done everything to make others happy, which I always thought made me happy. It did but then just recently I realized I need to worry only about me AND then others. I have always been a very giving person. I feel very empathic around others and it drains me which is why it is so hard for me to change my ways, but I need to be happy too! I just want to tell you, you are a great person and you dont need anyone but YOU to be happy. If others dont respect that then they dont deserve to be friends with you. I honestly think I know how you have been feeling. I have only mentioned this to a few people lately but I just cant take it anymore! I really wish I could live on another planet right now because of what I have been through! I just keep my head high and think about me and then others right now.

reply to post by ldyserenity

That's what I mean. The society that we live in promotes the idea that who we are is defined by where we are on the social hierarchy, therefore we have to put others beneath us in order to feel good about our existence. That's our basic ideology...

I felt so bad in school that I started skipping school when I was in 3rd grade and spent most of my adolescence in several different group homes, because if I had the choice to go to school or not, I would not subject myself to it. I've had 'social anxiety' because of it (or maybe how I felt was a product of my social anxiety)... it's something I still have to deal with today.

Our society doesn't seem to value individuals who aren't driven to 'achieve' a higher position in the social hierarchy, that's all I'm really saying... but you can disagree if you want.

reply to post by ldyserenity


G'night young lady. Hope you realize that you are respected, remembered, acknowleged. We're here for you. Remember that.

Mike

Originally posted by autowrench
Well, I too have been robbed, cheated, stolen from, slapped around for most of my life. I forgive all who have harmed me, may they suffer their own Karma, and may I be free of it.
Life is school, it is a place of learning, so keep learning from every experience that happens to you. Love all beings, for all are children of the Creator(s)

True, karma is a B**** lol. I do forgive them, but That don't mean I got to be friends with them, right? I never really git slapped around, thank goodness, I don't know what I'd have done then. Maybe it was my own karma to begin with that made me endure this. WHo knows? I often thought of that back then I used to say I must've been Hitler last go around. But the most recent PL recall I had was being a little girl around the time of the JFK assassination and being killed by my mother. SHeesh, I must've been working out some kind of awful karma. So my debts are paid and I can move on, that's what I have to see...wow thanks for pointing that out, even if not directly.

Originally posted by mikerussellus
reply to post by ldyserenity

 

G'night young lady. Hope you realize that you are respected, remembered, acknowleged. We're here for you. Remember that.

Mike

Thank you, And have a pleasent sleep. Take care.

I'll be alright.

reply to post by eMachine


Oh okay, I don't disagree, I just didn't understand. I misread what you were saying. My fault. lol. So you were one of us? Welcome to the club.

reply to post by ldyserenity

There's this old, old story from the Japanese Zen tradition that goes something like this -

A monk was on his way back from the market when he encountered a very large, very hungry tiger.

( It is hardly ever a good thing when this happens ! )

So the monk dropped the basket of goods he was carrying home and began to run away as fast he could - but the tiger was gaining !

He continued to run as fast as his legs would carry him, and when the hungry cat was nearly snapping at his heels the breathless monk ran out of road and found himself looking over a very high cliff.

There was no time to think of what to do next so he slid himself quickly over the edge and began to fall.

Luckily for the him, the monk was able to reach out and grab onto a wild grape vine on his way down. And this stopped his fall to certain death below.

But then he discovered that there was still a problem ! He couldn't climb down the vine because now there was another big tiger at the bottom looking up at him, licking its chops !

And to make matters even worse - now a little mouse had come out of its hole in the cliff and began to gnaw on the grape vine !

The monk realized he couldn't climb back up because there a hungry tiger waited to devour him, while at the same time he couldn't climb down because there another hungry tiger waited expectantly, and now, in only a short time the little mouse clearly would chew all the way through the vine !

The situation was hopeless ! What to do ?

Smiling serenly the monk plucked a nice ripe, juicy grape and thoroughly savored it's fresh and wonderful sweetness ...

My father once told me that story when I was in pretty much the same shape as you sound like you're in now ...

I had absolutely no idea what he was talking about !

( My dad was like that - may he rest in peace )

But, now, many, many years later I think I finally understand it, and someday you will too.

Hang in there - tomorrow is another day.

reply to post by mblahnikluver




Wow, I am an empathic person, too. I think this must be something all of us empathic people must go through. I don't pretend to understand why, and I certainly don't like it one bit, I hate feeling like this.

reply to post by ldyserenity


I'd have to say your post is ironic given your signature. Or maybe your signature is ironic given your post.

Either way, at the end of the day, you are ultimately in control of your reality. Though we do give that control over to others in the beginning of our life, we need to take it back eventually.

Understand that the feelings you have would go completely away if you had your own sense of authority. And yes, it would be great if your world could have just "given" it to you, but authority doesn't work that way.

The road to enlightenment, is not a peaceful one. It is one which the aspirant eventually realizes that there is no net. There is only them and their worlds.

Your subjective world is never an accurate depiction of your objective world. Which is why you can start making new patterns whenever you really want to.

My only advice to you, is Be your own God.

I feel it's all in my head,
I got that pencil instead
I write my own Reality
And I'm like "F" what they said!
They put that stuff in your head
You think your living but your dead!
You're just a dead man walking
Can you hear what I said?
It's your life man
Your story to write and
Your third eye sight man
Will always be right and
You sit at the right hand of God
So why is life hard...

I am honestly terrified of sending my daughter to school... she is to be enrolled in kindergarten this year... kids today are even meaner than they were when I was in school.

For example... my daughter used to play in our yard, on her swingset, and our neighbor's daughter would come over to play with her everyday. They were best friends... my daughter would talk about her friend all the time... one day, she even asked if she could marry her!

Then our upstairs neighbor had her grandchildren (3 boys) staying with her for a month or so, and they would come down and play with my daughter too. One day my daughter came inside bawling... she told me that one of the boys told her that her best friend said she was ugly! She was completely heartbroken.

It was just a little event, her first experience with 'gossip' I guess... what troubles me most, is I didn't know how to help a barely-4yr old rationalize someone lying and being mean for no reason...

Part of me wanted to use that old line my grandma used to tell me when I tried to talk to her about people teasing me: "They're just jealous"... but I never bought that as a kid, so I shouldn't confuse her with it.

I don't know how I will help her deal with it if we end up sending her to public school...

Trust me, I know and understand full to well what you have been saying,

once you hit bottom, everything is up from there. You are fortunate

you have been blessed with 3 loving children, taking care of them, and

raising them is a success in itself!! Don't let negitive people bring you

down. Know you are better then they are!! I call them physic vampires!!!

they drain you with their negative attitudes. Work on the positive things

in your life, start with your kids. Good luck to you!! Their is a good

support system here on ATS, some of us are truly caring people

willing to lend a shoulder, or give our wise advice...lol when needed.

take care!!

Originally posted by ldyserenity
It's too late for me to do anything. I have been strong long enough I give up! I am not going to do anything anymore. I know what they said then isn't true, but now after so many years, it's too late. I am too old to do anything I just want out! I hate this place. And the mean people are far more prevalent than the good.

Omegapoint...I don't even know anybody who has ever gotten harassed as bad as I have. So as for stopping it from happening to somebody else...well all I can do and have done is teach my children not to treat people that way. I think my exit point is coming up real soon and I will take it.If you read Sylvia Browne or even know her work some other way you'll understand what that is.

There is no exit. You're already part of everything, fully loved and accepted as you are. You need to surrender to what is, and let go, without trying to escape or checkout, and in so doing, achieve enlightenment. But it that doesn't work I have an idea of something you can try, will u2u you.

reply to post by ldyserenity


Don't you sense an endlessly humorous joke somewhere lurking at the end of it all..?

I do, and my heart goes out to those who will never be able to get it.

man prove em wrong and rise up. this world is geared ot break us down, just another challenge of life, don't let people tell you how you should feel. i understand you frustration but put it to a good use.

i work as a football/soccer coach.

i am used to being hated, used to people saying things, used to people having a go, talking behing my back etc.

im 36, after a while, i just let it go over my head.

Dont let the world eat you up and spit you out my friend.

we ALL get down from time to time, we all say "i have had enough" sometimes.

watch this video:

evil may win, but perhaps if there is reincarnation, the next life for friend and foe fortune may favor your efforts.

reply to post by LiveForever8


Awesome reply.
I just logged in to say that hahaha.

Originally posted by ldyserenity
reply to post by mblahnikluver

 

Wow, I am an empathic person, too. I think this must be something all of us empathic people must go through. I don't pretend to understand why, and I certainly don't like it one bit, I hate feeling like this.

Trust me, you aint alone.
half the battle is realising you aint along.

talking about it helps.

get the video 2 posts above watched.

Sounds like you need a little pick me up. Here's my contribution:

Allways wear sunscreen