The Sexodus: The Men Giving Up On Women And Checking Out Of Society

a reply to: all2human

I'm sorry, but MY instinct sure as hell isn't to be a caring mother and fawn over a husband and children. I have no children and no desire to have children. I have no husband and I'm okay with that. Love will come in it's own time.

I'm my own breadwinner, and I'm quite happy with that.

Don't speak for all members of a gender, it makes you look uninformed.

What about the men out there who want to stay at home with the kids and be the primary child-rearing member, while the wife is perfectly happy to earn the money? Instincts are one thing, but humans are SMART enough to determine their own wants and needs, and put instincts aside if it conflicts with their personal desires.

If instincts were the rule of law in determining how genders act, we would be nowhere near as advanced a civilization as we are today.

originally posted by: ScientificRailgun
a reply to: all2human
What about the men out there who want to stay at home with the kids and be the primary child-rearing member, while the wife is perfectly happy to earn the money?

I've heard them called "babysitters" rather than being a parent. Not my words heh

Love will come in it's own time.

Liking this optimism

originally posted by: ScientificRailgun

What about the men out there who want to stay at home with the kids and be the primary child-rearing member, while the wife is perfectly happy to earn the money? Instincts are one thing, but humans are SMART enough to determine their own wants and needs, and put instincts aside if it conflicts with their personal desires.

I actually know several "house husbands" that are doing it by choice.

I'm no fan of generalisations, but what I've observed, guys nowadays are so sensitive. They bitch and wine about every time you do something they don't like, but have no regard how they're having a negativ impact on their fellow humans. Also they need support in almost everything they do, always something funny to watch. So maybe it is a good thing, these guys learn to survive on their own?
And once they grew up, maybe all the "feminists" wouldn't have to be so bitchy all the time anymore.

What you call tradition, i call instinct.
An advanced self-destructive civilization
go figure..

a reply to: Annee

I do as well, well back home I do. I say more power to em! Traditional gender roles are still pretty prominent in my current surroundings.

a reply to: yourmaker

See, this is why the stigma needs to vanish. Good dads that stay at home while the wife works are awesome. They're not babysitters, they're just good parents!

Regarding my love situation, I know I face an uphill battle. Being a single, foreign woman in Japan is tough. You'd think Japanese men would love an exotic foreigner, but really they are very quiet and docile around me. I've had a few flings, but nothing really concrete. I'm okay with being single for now. I love my life as it is! I love my surroundings and I love my job.

a reply to: all2human

Animals fight over territory constantly. Even plants vie for control of patches of land. Humans simply do it on a grander scale with better equipment.

And don't ever assume know my instincts. If I were to "follow my instincts" my biological clock would be telling me it's time to pop out a few kids. Strangely, it's not.

I don't know the motivations of other young men but I opted out of the traditional lifestyle (job, wife, house, kids, car) for personal reasons. Women had very little bearing on that decision. Seems kind of disingenuous to lay the blame on anything. I made the choice to life a very simple and quiet life devoid of romance and excitement. If you want those things go out and get them, not make excuses.

I'm quite content with my situation. Very peaceful and very little stress. Ironically most of my stress comes from interacting with couples as they struggle to not get angry with each other.

I am a House Husband...

The wife makes more than I can anymore.

No Shame Here...

I take care of the kid and always have. I am great with kids and animals.

It's adults I don't get along with.

I still have all my racehorses...So, I bring a check home occasionally.

a reply to: whyamIhere

Thank you for standing up and saying that. It's refreshing to see people who aren't afraid to buck tradition and do what they love.

Granted everyone may not be affected as much as the other around the planet. But, It will be interesting to observe how a lot of ideals on this subject amongst others pan out once the economic collapse is initiated. I hope the outcome of society after the reset is opposite of what the architects of where it is now hope to accomplish...

originally posted by: shamaniski

originally posted by: amazing

originally posted by: Bundy
I love women, but a lot of them seem to have boarded the crazy train.

The biggest difference i see is this: When i was 6 years old, i wanted to be a ninja. That's right a #in ninja. At some point I GREW UP and realized that this was not realistic. Most girls at 6 years old want to marry a prince and become a queen of a castle and rule over the peasants.

The end.

I love women too. I have to say that a lot of men I know, seem to have boarded the crazy train.

When I was six years old I wanted to be a ninja as well. That's right a ninja. Truth is.. I am a ninja. About as close as you can be...teaching martial arts full time and training in several disciplines at the same time. I grew up to become that ninja and I make a living at it. What girl doesn't want to marry a ninja? I found quite a few that didn't want to marry a prince or become a queen or rule over peasants and I picked one and married her.

The end.

Wow u work full time and you have a wife!!! How do people do that? How do people work?

I know! Crazy, right?? LOL

I've been out of relationship with any women for about 6 years so far, by choice.
No issues with the female gender per se, I love my twin sister, my ex-wife is my most trusted friend, and I'm good mates with loads of girls in my healthy real life social circle.
I've had a few deep relationships over the years and I'm good friends with every ex, and more than comfortable meeting up at festivals, parties, club nights or whatever.

I have an active recreational sex life with equally consenting girls, and I make no secret that I'm not interested in being in a serious relationship with anyone right now, maybe I've not bumped into the 'right' one yet, but I'm certainly not searching to fill any void in my life.

I love being able to dump my work clothes on my bathroom floor and leave them until washing day without anyone moaning at me. I love not having to reply hourly to text after text from a needy partner as many of my mates do. I love not having to shave until the weekend when I go out. I love not having to pretend to give a toss about fabrics and furnishings while being dragged around some furniture store. I love the freedom to do anything on a whim without seeking approval off anyone else. I love being able to hide away in my man cave with work tools laying around next to the multi-gym in my living room. I love not being told that I must work 5 days this week as some home furnishings or whatever need to be paid for. I love how cheap Christmas and Valentines nights are for me without a significant other, hell I love having more expendable cash than most of my mates who are in a relationship because I only have to spend my money on myself, aside from paying for dinner/drinks/club entrance/taxi's/kebab/blah when attracting a girl for recreational sex, but that is a fair exchange as far as I see it. Yep all in all I love being single.

I have deep friendship relationships with males and females in my social circle so do not crave emotional support. I feel loved deeply by my late teen son and my family. My home is not a lonely place as I have a crazy cat who craves a comfy lap or the foot of my bed to sleep on, and my lad stays at mine 3-4 nights per week. Recreational sex is not difficult to arrange, so all in all I see nothing drawing me towards wanting to restrict myself in any relationship right now.

Good luck to all those video game playing basement dwelling males who may or may not feel intimidated or whatever by relationships or rejection by females, but in my case I just perceive the grass as much greener on my side and the idea of being in a restrictive relationship again is not my cup of tea at all... [/shudders]

a reply to: HiroProtagonist

Social interaction/interpersonal skills require practice with all sorts of people. I am curious why you choose to smoke MJ and play video games, instead of getting out there and accepting volunteering opportunities and/or join special interest clubs? Do you have any special interests or talents that you could share with others and meet new people?

originally posted by: dawnstar
a reply to: SearchLightsInc

somewhere along the line I got the impression that in the old days there were women inventing and discovering different things but since the society was so male dominated alot of the times they needed their husbands to claim them as theirs to have them accepted.

you also have to consider how women of those days were expected to dress. It was cumbersome and made many tasks difficult to do.

“And now I’m dressed like a little girl, in a dress both loose and short,
Oh with what freedom I can sing, and walk all ‘round about!
And when I get a little strength, some work I think I can do,
‘Twill give me health and comfort, and make me useful too.”[15]

en.wikipedia.org...

We can thank a women for our freedom of movement!!!

Funny you should mention that, the bronte sisters who wrote such classics as Wuthering Heights and Jane Eyre were refused publishing because they were women, according to one of the publisher's, women's place should be looking after a household, not writing books that held up a mirror to the society of that time. They did indeed try (and i think once sucessfully) got published by pretending to be men. Go figure.

originally posted by: InTheLight
a reply to: HiroProtagonist

Social interaction/interpersonal skills require practice with all sorts of people. I am curious why you choose to smoke MJ and play video games, instead of getting out there and accepting volunteering opportunities and/or join special interest clubs? Do you have any special interests or talents that you could share with others and meet new people?

As he said he's an introvert. I am as well, I can communicate quite well when I want to but that's just it, I usually DON'T want to. I can relate as I have a hard time spending extended periods of time around people I'm comfortable with, let alone new people. Also with depression, volunteering is the last thing you want to do at least from what I've learned over years of struggling with it. You don't feel attached or a part of the world around you and in many ways you detest it, and as such have no desire in doing things that in your mind validate it.

This of course being my own view and experience on the matter (I have many similarities with Hiro, just a bit younger and unemployed) But I would say he would agree with some of my points perhaps.

originally posted by: corvuscorrax

originally posted by: InTheLight
a reply to: HiroProtagonist

Social interaction/interpersonal skills require practice with all sorts of people. I am curious why you choose to smoke MJ and play video games, instead of getting out there and accepting volunteering opportunities and/or join special interest clubs? Do you have any special interests or talents that you could share with others and meet new people?

As he said he's an introvert. I am as well, I can communicate quite well when I want to but that's just it, I usually DON'T want to. I can relate as I have a hard time spending extended periods of time around people I'm comfortable with, let alone new people. Also with depression, volunteering is the last thing you want to do at least from what I've learned over years of struggling with it. You don't feel attached or a part of the world around you and in many ways you detest it, and as such have no desire in doing things that in your mind validate it.

This of course being my own view and experience on the matter (I have many similarities with Hiro, just a bit younger and unemployed) But I would say he would agree with some of my points perhaps.

There are many different volunteering opportunities where you don't have to face people if you don't want to, like packing food in boxes in the back for a food bank...working behind the scenes and interacting with very few people. But, the point I am making, is that a little effort to help yourself is better than no effort at all.

a reply to: grainofsand

I could see myself very much grow old in a tiny place smoking, playing and would have no problem with that at all. Sounds like paradise, to be honest. Because one thing video games have and most converstaions don't: content. I was with a guy and we were very happy as long as we found things we played together, but besides that we had nothing incommon, not just that, not even remotely fitting opposites, or something where tying it up would have made it more stable. But we are humans, one male, one female and we're playing now on different consoles. So much for generalisation.
Another thing: Guys are basically handicaped, if you think about it, the Y-Chromosome is just a disfigured X. No wonder, they are so helpless and everybody is so mean... Bad women, Mommy always said Iam the best. Why don't you do that too? Probably hard for guys to accept in a modern relationship the focus is a lot more on mutual benefit. So many dudes don't even try to please their woman, but somehow still want a warm bed, a meal, nice, clean and neet, because they have a woman in the house now. Means for the guys I observed: I got a job, besides that I do nothing.
Means for the women: #, now that I have a dude I need to do dishes, washing, cooking for two after the job.
So yeah I can totally see myself becoming a hermit with a xbox.

a reply to: corvuscorrax
I read your earlier post and wish you good luck man. I can't offer any advice as I have mostly gone with the 'sex first' thing when starting out with a girl, but I do say hang on in there and know that another bloke on the planet at least genuinely feels for you and your situation.

a reply to: Peeple
Haha I'm no hermit. I do love the choice to be one as I choose though.
Nope, for me it is about living freely without any female influence in my life choices aside from mutually consensual recreational sex. I love that women are not deemed 'sluts' if they enjoy sex, like they used to be when I was growing up.
Yep, feminism, and the equality of sexual freedom is a brilliant thing as far as I'm concerned. Independent women who have no need for a man aside from recreational sex is something I enjoy in the 21st century.
Still not equal though in my experience as the expectation is usually for me to pay for the meal/drinks/club entrance/taxi's/blah...but as I said I'm happy with that exchange.