Need help forgetting an ex

reply to post by DIDtm


Thanks a lot man, yeah I did everything you already said, its definitely helped. I got rid of her on facebook, I deleted her number from my phone book, she contacted me last and that was the day of the break up, I have not contacted her since, its just annoying when mutual friends tell me what's she's doing, and I am distancing myself from them too atleast for the time being. Thanks a lot for the advice, I really hope I'll get over her, I'm not a desperate person but I am really iffy about trustworthy chicks being out there, its like really hard to find them nowadays. I just don't trust girls anymore.

reply to post by Unvarnished


I understand Dear. Its great that there were alot of good things. the important thing to remember is she more then likely isnt the one for you. And by holding on to her like that your stoping any chance of actually finding the one for you. Now it will TAKE TIME so definately greive accordingly, wounds have to heal in order to move on. Pace your self but dont get so stuck on what was that you cant move forward. Be thankful for the happiness you did have and look forward to expirenceing more and more. Youll find your girl one day or better yet maybe she will find you

reply to post by caladonea


You hit right everything on the dot caladonea, a mutual friend told me a few weeks ago that she already went on a few dates with this guy and it pissed me off. But wow you're right, I just need to focus on myself.

reply to post by concerned24


Thanks a lot, I'm definitely not jumping into another relationship anytime soon, I feel like it will backfire and I'll end up in square one again. I guess its time to work on myself.

reply to post by Unvarnished


You got it ace! Your smart you got this. Let that heart heal and until then enjoy and focus on yourself. I promise you will come out of it a better and more confident man then before.What doesnt kill us makes us stronger right? ;D

Yuh, it will never heal. The animosity will still be there every time you look at them.

Just find a new girlfriend.

reply to post by Unvarnished


The best way to get over someone is to get under someone else

reply to post by Unvarnished


"I don't trust chicks anymore I don't know why." Ahh yes, I know this feeling, but try not to take it out on all women. Caladonea is right that this particular girl is immature, it sounds like she's confused and trying to figure out what she wants. It really sucks that she sucked you into her storm man but do yourself a favor and just analyze yourself for a while. If you focus on judging her too much you'll end up avoiding your own insecurities which will only manifest in later relationships. Seriously, the reason you're even thinking about taking her back after what she has done is because you haven't realized your true worth as yet.

reply to post by Manhater


I know if I get a better chick she's gonna go cuckoo, I forgive but I'll never forget what she did to me. I guess that's just a part of growing up I guess.

reply to post by Sentience365


Thanks for giving me the reality check man, I really appreciate it. I don't even think I'd take her back because I wouldn't be able to trust her again, there is that saying, a relationship is like glass, its better to leave a relationship broken apart than hurt yourself trying to put it back together, there will always be cracks. It was just a really big blow to my self confidence, I guess its natural to feel unwanted after a break up.

reply to post by Akragon


Hahhaha, good call, I know if I hook up with someone else right now I'm gonna feel like @$$ lol

reply to post by Unvarnished


Yeah man it's only natural to feel that way. You'll be alright though, go out with some friends and have a good time soon.

Peace.

Originally posted by Unvarnished
reply to post by caladonea

 

I feel like if I forgive her I'm just letting my guard down, is that what is stopping me from letting go and finally moving on?

Imo, forgiveness is for you, not the other. I cant forget my first "love" (2 kids together, later adopted out)
I forgive him. He doesnt know, but I do.

Currently in relationship, 4 kids.. I forgive him. But he gets my cold shoulder. hes a cheater. Im on the idk cuz I got kids threshhold... he dont know I know. But I do. So im in the middle of my own crisis. Forgiveness is for you.

Originally posted by Unvarnished
reply to post by Akragon

 

Hahhaha, good call, I know if I hook up with someone else right now I'm gonna feel like @$$ lol

Do you believe shes not doing exactly that?

If you do you're quite nieve. .

no offence

More then likely she already had someone picked out before you two broke up

I've had a couple long term relationships, I'd say the best thing to do is to get out there and meet new woman. don't ever push for a relationship to be something more than it is. Vodka is cheap and easily available in most counties. You'll never forget, but hopefully you've learned something. I was with a girl for 5 years (knew her for 7). Shortly after we broke up I bet the girl I'm currently engaged to. This didn't happen over night though. Complicate story, but the first few months, we did nothing more than chat from time to time on face book. Before I knew it we were talking everynight, in a couple of weeks I'll be living with her. I haven't known her as long as the girl I was with for years of my life, but I'm happier than I've ever been with her. My point is that life's weird. Up, down, left, right, f* it. Live you life the best you can, and learn from every experience.

Pets can be great help too. My kitties and I are bffs for life, or till i pass out in an alcoholic stooper and she eats my eyes out cause she thinks I'm dead.

reply to post by Unvarnished


Hey Dude,

As a serial monogamist I know exactly where your coming from. Ive had many break ups and some effect me more than others but I can reassure you that one day youll find it hard to believe or even remember feeling crappy and sad like you do right now.

My best advice is find rebound girl asap, dont lie and say ur looking for a relationship just be honest and say your up for a good time and to forget the ex. As long as ur not a girly sop women will appreciate the honesty and most chicks love a damaged guy LOL.

Try not to stress dude, one day ul be able to laugh about this.
Anyway what you doin tonight? Get on a plane to Malaysia, 1 night out on the pull with me and you wont remember the ex I promise

P.s Just in case, No Im not hitting on you

Originally posted by Unvarnished
reply to post by Manhater

 

I know if I get a better chick she's gonna go cuckoo, I forgive but I'll never forget what she did to me. I guess that's just a part of growing up I guess.

I would be careful about that. Especially depending on how cuckoo she really is. I went out with a guy that had an x girlfriend that just wouldn't let go and she came at me with a knife when she saw me near him. I told him flat out. Screw this, I don't need your drama and left. I told her she could have him, if she wanted him that bad..

In life, we will all confront this challenge at some point. I believe your loss is ultimately a gift. I believe in destiny and fate, and that you will look back at this time and thank God for unanswered prayers. This person was not your destiny, you must have faith that everything happens for a reason.

I was about your age, when my fiance dumped me. I thought I would die. I was destroyed. I ended up meeting my husband soon after. We have been together 26 years...blissfully happy.

My ex, has turned into a fat toad. No children, no wife, and absolutely pathetic. He didn't appreciate me. I couldn't understand why...when he had professed that he would love me forever. There is a reason for your breakup. She doesn't appreciate you and ultimately would be toxic for you.

Now you must learn to let go. Make a decision to keep the good memories...but don't visit them often and keep reinforcing the memory. Invest in yourself. Focus on yourself, and stay very busy. Every day it will become easier.

Don't play the 'what if' game. It is a waste of time. Focus on today. Build for your future. And don't waste one more minute of your precious youth on something that was. I wish someone had told me the same. I wasted years trying to figure out why, when there was never an answer. Your youth is the most valuable thing you will ever experience. Protect it and appreciate it.

If my advice hits home, pm me and I would be honored to mentor you. Let go...and trust that wherever in this world you should be, you will be.

reply to post by lostviking


What like forest gump?