Judge has harsh words for Mom before sentencing her for spanking her kid

Originally posted by ExPostFacto
reply to post by Bee2010

 

I have to smack my child's hands frequently as it is the only form of discipline he seems to understand. That and loud noises will make him stop and reconsider his actions. Tell me I am a bad parent, and I will explain to you why this is necessary. My child is 5 years old. Should I not discipline him in this manner? How should I discipline him?

Sorry I didn't see this post of yours when I made my last post. I don't want you to think I'm implying YOUR son is the Dennis the Menace I was referring to.

I know you weren't asking me about how you discipline your son but my answer is it's working for you and him and he loves and respects you, fine. It doesn't sound like you are inflicting damage. Boys can be challenging. I babysit them sometimes. They are different. I have an icy glare of death that seems to work on the ones I take care of. Beyond that, their parents employ whatever methods they see fit at home.

Originally posted by dolphinfan


A felony? This woman gets a felony conviction for giving her kid a typical spanking?

But what right does this judge think that he can tell this woman not to mildly spank her child?

Spanking a child mildly is an effective tool in teaching disciplining a child. Certainly it should be used after other methods are attempted, but giving a kid a swat on the kiester is not child abuse and certainly should not be considered a felony.

The kid was not harmed, the kid was taken to the hospital and no injury observed.

The entire business was brought forth by the paternal grandmother? Is it likely that there is a bit of bad blood between the two? Absolutely.

If we had our kids totally doped up on drugs the way the elite would prefer there would not be any misbehaving, so perhaps the solution to not get convicted of a felony when, after other methods of displine fail, you give your kid a spanking.


www.volunteertv.com
(visit the link for the full news article)

You deserve 5 years probation for using the word "Kiester"

The sentence is excessive, imo. I was spanked as a child, and often. But with our daughter, we haven't spanked. So far, losing her privileges seems to be enough motivation for her to want to behave herself. I do recall however, tapping her hand when she was a toddler when she tried to reach for a hot skillet handle on the stove, while I was standing there cooking.

reply to post by Rhebefree


Watch out Rhebefree, they smell fear and uncertainty like rabid dogs!
I'm a married mom and still have some of the same fears as you. But fear has to be put on a shelf.

When you are at home and it's peaceful and quiet, that is the time to sit down and tell your daughter what kinds of behavior you expect. Say to her, you know that time we were at the store and you ran wild and wouldn't heed me? Then explain actions have consequences. Bad behavior means no time in the store to shop for things she might like. Good behavior means she may get an item or a privilege she has been wanting to earn. If you get the message out loud and clear to them when they are in a calm place with no distractions, when they are later at the store they will recall a bit of what you told them at home. Over time, if you consistently apply logical consequences...good ones for good behavior, bad ones for bad behavior, they will have the desired behavior reinforced and the boundaries set in their minds. And I personally do point out to my daughter when I think she has behaved well. I tell her how proud I was and thank her for a pleasant outing as if she were a friend who treated me to a nice day out. I don't overkill it, of course. I just say "Wow, I had a fun time with you. Thanks fir behaving so nicely and didn't we have a great day?"

My husband came up with the idea of concluding every day by asking what was her favorite part of the day. She asks us the same. Over time, it seems to have dawned in her subconscious that there is so much more favorite things to pick from on days when she's behaved well versus a day she got off track. Every kid has an off day so on those days, we hug and say let's try to do better tomorrow and we still find something good to report as a favorite thing, even if it is a lesson learned about being naughty that day. I read somewhere, it might have been here on ATS, as a matter of fact, that discipline is as much about positive reinforcement as it is about punishment. Mostly it is about delineating the boundaries and explaining what is expected. Kids need that to feel secure and confident.

Why are people complaining so much about the youth of today?

Kids and young adults are generally a little more self absorbed and socially awkward to the norms of society than the adult population because frankly they haven't been around as long and are LEARNING. I cannot speak very much against the youth being spoiled because I would be a hypocrite. I am spoiled and I admit it. I have a roof over my head, food in the kitchen, healthcare, and a college education in the process. I try to pay them back with doing chores and looking for jobs. I am extremely grateful for what I have.
I'm wasn't a perfect kid and everyone should quit pretending they were!

As for the ruling... I don't know how the judge could give that sentence with a clear conscience. I was spanked and you know what? I wasn't traumatized from it.

reply to post by SteveR


I am a father of three i spank my kids ass not often but it happens my dad spanked me and he got spanked by his dad its the way it goes you must not have kids or you must be ignorant to the kids of today they need more discipline or parenting or something allot of young kids today have no respect and there parents let them run wild so to speak.I don't see this being a felony any shape way or form unless the kids injured or severe marks or bruises are left that's over board but good ol ass whoopin is just letting them know they need to listen and respect there perents.

Originally posted by SteveR
There's something wrong with the parenting if violence is required.

Violence? Spanking is violence? Are you kidding? My father spanked me when I was young and I turned out alright... it isn't violence, stop making stuff up.

A felony for this is outrageous. How the hell will the mother get a job now?

reply to post by Vitchilo


Well under the have you ever been convicted of a felony question on the standard application there is usually a please explain section. I know because I've filled out a lot of them lately lol. (not the felony section of course)

I can see it now "I got a felony because I spanked my kid when he was being naughty"

I haven't read through every page of comments but this is what I have to say.

If you leave a mark on a child that lasts for more than 3 minutes, you've gone too far.

Like a previous poster has pointed out, give your arm a good hard slap. Tell me how long the mark lasted. Now decide for yourself if a child under the age of 10 deserves marks that last more than 3 minutes when acting up.

Originally posted by asmall89
reply to post by Vitchilo

 

Well under the have you ever been convicted of a felony question on the standard application there is usually a please explain section. I know because I've filled out a lot of them lately lol. (not the felony section of course)

I can see it now "I got a felony because I spanked my kid when he was being naughty"

edit on 18-6-2011 by asmall89 because: clarity

No one will believe that explanation though. The will assume you are a child abuser. I hope this woman has job security because her future just got taken for a ride without the lube.

According to OP, the spanking has left some red marks. But ordinary spanking should not left anything after a while. While I dont support criminalization of weak spanking, maybe this was much harsher psanking than the ordinary parental smack? It could be considered child abuse, then.

Originally posted by Soldier of God

Originally posted by SteveR
There's something wrong with the parenting if violence is required.

Yeah... look at all the great well rounded children out there today.

Dicipline and an occasional spanking is good parenting. Take a look at kids today who grew up in the "time out" era and compare them to the horrifying good 'ole spanking days... they are complete creeps with no respect for others, no work ethic, and think they are owed a living.
Sorry but this is just another way the socialist govt. is stealing the minds of the youth.

Well said.

"Wah, wah. I don't want my child to hate me I just wanna be their friend. They will grow up to respect me and like me more. I will just talk to them and treat them like a friend and not be an authority figure."

"Spare the rod, spoil the child."

I'm going to discipline the # out of my child. if that involves spanking, you better believe it. This is how raising a child goes. just like a lion biting her cub, sometimes we spank. Are you serious judge? I guess I'll make my child sign a contract first.

I'm 19, not really a kid but still young.....

Anyway, I don't even hit my dog, why would I hit my kid? (If I had one)

My parents hit me as a child. All it did was make me mad at them. It made me wonder why my mom wanted to cause me physical pain. It didn't deter me from misbehaving because I got spanked more than once. And this is the case for all kids. A good parent should want their kids respect, not fear.


AND to the people saying that the youth are bad workers, no motivation, etc. I'm pretty sure the main contributing factor is that we can see that we have NO real future. No jobs, college means nothing, no social security when we get old and the vast majority are dumbed down.

A lot of my friends responses to any political news I tell them is "Oh well, the world is going to *Snip* anyway". The youth have absolutely nothing to look forward to and have been brainwashed into apathy/mediocrity from public schooling.

reply to post by dolphinfan


Lets think logically about this....

I got spanked plenty of times...and hard too, with yardstick, tree branches...you name it...but I never had red marks long enough to be used as evidence. This kid was taken to the hospital because of those marks by her Grandmother...That suggests that those red marks must have stayed there for quite a while....I can't imagine hitting a kid hard enough to leave marks like that. It seems clear that the mother was engaging in some fairly excessive 'spanking'.

Does the Judge have any children?
If yes, what and how are they today?
All this is absurd. You cant punish but you can be punished...for anything.
If the child does something drastic the law will still punish the parent.
This is going to total dialysis of the family and society, one snitching on the other.

As many of the posters on this thread have already said, sometimes with very young children a short,sharp, shock is the only way to impress on them about dangerous situations. Try explaining to a 2yr old that getting hit by a car can kill them...they just don't have the capcity to understand that.

My daughter was spanked 3 times as a toddler, once for running out into the road, once for reaching up to a pot on the stove and once for sticking her hand into an electrical socket. My reaction to spank her was more out of concern for her safety rather than a punishment. I also raised my voice simultaneously when she did these things, then calmly explained that it wasn't that I was angry, it was that I was scared she would get hurt.

Never had to spank her after those events...if her behavior escalated all I had to do was "use that voice" and she knew immediately that she was at the line that must not be crossed.

I was spanked as a kid, I even got switched on the legs! Now that's something painful.

I'm sure most of you can tell the difference between beating a child, and spanking them. My mother had a way with words, and would smack me on the butt if I did something wrong, but she never hit me with her fist. Spanking is not beating.

I've seen first hand what time-out does to a kid. It doesn't do anything.

Texas, what is wrong with you??? really??????


What a deranged world this is becoming.
I think I would of told the judge to take a flying leap.
Any lawyer worth anything would have had this case walked right out the front door.
I sense either mistrial or escalating to the State Court.

We had no problems with my daughter till she went to school... but we know how that goes.

My son however we use certain things like making him a back rest on the couch till he stops crying or yelling etc. And for the stove issue, i explained it was hot then moved the pan over and showed him the fire. tehn gently grabbed his hand and moved it close enough to where he could feel the heat (my hand was still close to gauge the temp). He immediatly pulled back we have not had a problem since. However we still take off the knobs since we have a gas stove so NO ONE will accidentally leave the gas open.

My mother hit me only once. I was not a good kid, But i was far from bad. My mother used the losing things tactic on me (my bike was a big one as well as video games). And we practice the same. For my son we have started using the corner and holding (full) coke cans (gotta use em for something since we don't drink em) at arms length. This not only makes them stronger but it causes them a pain that is in no way leaving a mark other than a mental one.

For this case, i feel the judge was way out of line. But karma is coming... and fast to all of amerikans.