Child Support -- Vendetta Against Males

reply to post by Aeons


I have to agree with that one....

completely...

Originally posted by getreadyalready
reply to post by getreadyalready

 

And let me add that there it certainly is not "against males." The margin isn't 50/50, but it is much closer than anyone would believe. There are a lot of successful woman out there paying child support to men. There are also women out there, who have the kids the majority of the time, and still pay support to the men!! I'm not talking about "spousal" support, I am talking about child support.

The system is fair, and the government adminstration of the system is fair, now the people involved are almost never forthcoming, or fair, and they do manipulate everything, but the only "vendetta" is the one that each person has against their "ex." And the only real victims are the kids.

Fair? Are you kidding..

www.youtube.com...

reply to post by peck420


Do. Document. Account for it. Do what you need to do.

But *do* it.

And remember - If every your child ends up with $50 extra dollars one month, it won't kill you.

reply to post by Lil Drummerboy


Wow quite a story there mate, respect!
I can understand what you must have felt. Recently i became aware of my ex partners
infidelity so i forked out for the DNA tests and lo and behold my little six year old boy
is not mine. She has ended my child support and is in the process of chasing up the
biological father for his contribution. Now i am childless with no legal right of access.

Originally posted by leo123

1) I never begrudged paying it, but I must say I always had it in the back of my mind, "How TF do you spend $5g/mth on two kids when you are living in a fully paid home and I pay the school fees to boot?

2) Up here the quality of your lawyer has nothing to do with how much you pay. They take your income tax forms from the last 3 years, got to line 150, take that income amount and look it up on our Federal Child guidelines - and THAT's what you pay.

3) As mentioned in an above post, this type of system is almost tantamount to being an incentive for the mother to leave.

What people don't seem to understand, is that circumstance is very different in Canada than it is in the USSA. The Social service system in Canada is geared towards assisting the woman. Yes, this is an archaic concept as women can earn as much as men, but this really is the way it is up here.

The woman may have kids from several households, even make a career out of raising bastard children and collect child support from each of the fathers separately. Slowly the system is changing to recognize these predatory women, but that change is slow.

The courts are also beginning to recognize that it isn't always the men running off, or making the home life unbearable. They have also started awarding men primary custody, and creating support orders for the women, as well as requiring significant proof of abuse before denying a shared custody order. Progress is slow, but it is coming.

..Ex

No, it isn't.

Guys who retain lawyers and pursue their cases do just fine.

When it is the guy who retains original custody upon termination of the parents' relationship, the woman has to do the same thing.

Originally posted by lestweforget
reply to post by Lil Drummerboy

 

Wow quite a story there mate, respect!
I can understand what you must have felt. Recently i became aware of my ex partners
infidelity so i forked out for the DNA tests and lo and behold my little six year old boy
is not mine. She has ended my child support and is in the process of chasing up the
biological father for his contribution. Now i am childless with no legal right of access.

Well, though I consider the Young man my son and he see's me as dad.
I am now in my mid 40's and am left with the reality of no one to carry my bloodline.
There is a great deal of sadness in my heart. Some have called me selfish for feeling this way.
I have said to them , unless they have been in my shoes they have no right to judge me.
I still help him out all the time with things.
and am assisting him with his collage finances.
I have somewhat accepted this circumstance. cause there really isnt anything I can do about it.

I had found out who the real father was, But the man has some SERIOUS issues.
and it would be best to leave it alone.
At least your ex was kind enough to stop the support.
Mine knew who the father was.

reply to post by logicalthinking


Child support is unconstitutional. Nowhere in the constitution does it say I have to pay some woman to sit at home and not get a job or learn to provide a living to a child. In fact its outright communism and slavery by placing a human in bondage in perpetuity until the child is 18 due to the neglect of a woman who chose to have the child.

Its very simple if a woman has the child ITS HER RESPONSIBILITY, not the males. Then again I have common sense and believe in capitalism unlike these people who always want a free handout. if they cant afford to have the kid then put it up for adoption or have an abortion.

Its time we bring child support up for votes in state elections to remove this socialist fragment from our beloved America. All this does is teach young women that you can get free handouts by giving it up to every guy on the street.

Originally posted by Hefficide
It's about you doing right by your kids.

I understand that but what you don't realise is that your kids are being used as a weapon against you to make you cough up as much as possible, so the Government can save as much money as possible on welfare payments.

If it was about the kids, how much you pay would be determined by how much your kids need, just like in a family situation.

Doesn't it seem suspicious that in order to determine how much your kids need, they need to know how much you have?

And although the rates payable are supposed to be based on income, they're not. They have a list of technicalities that they can use against you to make you pay even more than their own equations say you should.

I have had months where the amount I have been charged exceeds my entire income for that period. That is a cruel way to force someone to be more productive.

And the suicide statistics are rigged badly also. Here it is only considered a child support suicide if no other reasons are known. So if you suffer from "depression" because of the stress of paying child support, it's not considered a child support suicide, because you had a "mental illness". And it's not taken into consideration what caused the depression in the first place. They will find any excuse to avoid responsibility for their actions, as per standard Government procedure.

Originally posted by Hefficide
To try and bend ones responsibility like this is just whining.

If I was the Government and decided to charge you 95% of your income for your kids, would you still consider it your "responsibility" to pay up? What about 101%?

I bet you would whine then.

Originally posted by NoRegretsEver
What your kid thinks of you, and the love and yes even financing that you provide, goes a long way in the end.

What makes you think the kid even knows he is paying? Most of the time, they don't, and think their Dad's a bum who couldn't care less.

Originally posted by rushunt
heck yeah thats a good gig. What about in a situation where she has 3 kids by 3 different dads. that adds up to some serious income!

The good thing is they get used to it, and once the child leaves home, it hits them super hard.

In fact, some of them get that used to receiving "their money" that they even ring the CSA in protest when the payments cease. They literally can't understand why they're not entitled to it because the child is no longer in their care.

Here is what gets me.

Someone said their amount was 5000.00 and mine is 450.00 and that dude who is working for minimum wage is only like 200.00 so what you telling me is that my daughter who lives with me and always will, who cost me ???? say food diapers and stuff like 150.00 extra and occasionally 250.00 or 300.00 when we need clothes a month can cost 5000.00 a month? if I made that much while the guy with minimum wage gets like 200.00 a month now there is something wrong here.

I can raise mine on 200.00 a month as average and her well being has nothing to do with money. It has to do with love and attention.

We all say money doesn't make you happy!

I guess my extra 250.00 which isn't a big deal but this poor guys 4800.00 a month provides a niiiice living for the mother.

5000.00 a month is more than I make all together and I have a nice house a new truck a 83" LCD Im doing good.
so I can imagine what that lady has.

this is just stupid. I have a suggestion to people who pay 5000.00 or more a month. save some money, quit your job and go get a job at 7-11 make minimum wage for a few weeks get an amendment and let mom loose her house and car

THAT SOUNDS FAIR. freeloaders

reply to post by logicalthinking

you are right the laws are not equals

i am a single father i always ad costudy

and i dont get child support...the mother dosent work her boyfriend does...

if i was a women the system would say"oh poor little girl we gonna got you child support we will go after your ex's partner

but since im a man the system tell's me"well you want costudy well take your responsability and go work"and on top of it they accuse me and they try to prove that i was screwing the system for about 5 years

they make me feels like an *** hole if i was going after child support...

so dont tell me the system is equal

reply to post by Lil Drummerboy



Mid 40s is not too old to have biological children.

reply to post by rushunt



yeah. You aparently have never seen a Bell Curve.

I don't understand why, when a non-custodial parent (ussually Dad) loses their job and can't pay they get vilified and possibly thrown in jail, while when a custodial parent (ussually Mom) loses their job they just get more money from the non-custodial, and/or welfare, handouts, public housing etc. etc. etc.

Having said that, there are true deadbeats out there, from both genders. My wife had a daughter before we met and her Father never paid a dime in support so she ran up all kinds of debt to pay for daycare etc. etc. which I ended up paying off for her. I think he owes her something like 55k at this point, the state doesn't care because she isn't on welfare.

Originally posted by Aeons
reply to post by Lil Drummerboy

 

Mid 40s is not too old to have biological children.

Yes it is. Forget about the fact you are simply not going to have the energy in your mid-to late 50's to raise a young teenager, the odds of being able to have a heathy baby that hasn't got Downs or 15 toes - let alone even GETTING pregnant - are astonishingly low.

Mid 30's at the latest. Anything older than that is simply a selfish act and not in a child's best interests.

reply to post by logicalthinking


Many people will bash your opening thread but I can vouch for your information as I am the paternal grandmother.

Guys, you better start thinking with the head on your shoulders instead of the one between your legs when it comes to picking out a "woman".

Get a woman pregnant and she has you legally bound and gagged. She can harass you, harass your fiance, call your work, stalk you, make you "pay up" to the point of handing over most of your pay, or have you thrown into jail if you lose your job, she can and will most likely alienate your child from you by telling them lies and only letting you see them when it is convenient for her.............even if the court says different. Only men are expected to "tow the line" women can pretty much do whatever they feel like, even to the extent of thumbing their noses up to what the court / judge rule.

Hollywood paints a picture of the evil male, the stalking, brutish male, when in fact, in our case, it's more like my son married and had a baby with the gal who played in the movie, "Fatal Attraction" (Glen Close).

Again, men, You had better think long and deep before you dip your wick...........

The courts don't care about you or your child, your child by virtue of the fact that your wife or lover carried that baby is considered by law, her property. I have pleaded with the court to just talk with my grand daughter to no avail. She is not considered a "person" by right of law until she hits 12.

Upon leaving us to go back to her mother, her last sobbing words to me were again, "Grandma, I want to stay with my papa, please don't make me go back to my mother"...............I had to reply, "Baby, the law is the law, we cannot let you stay, they would throw your papa in jail."

There is no justice for the children most women are vendictive, it is in our very nature. And most are using their child (your child) as pawns to get back at you.

Now, I am not defending men that are out there that are brutish, violent, lazy, non supportive...........I can only express my experiences.

Before my daughter in law pulled out of our driveway and hid for three months with our grand daughter, I told her in front of the police, if she did not make this divorce into a battle and drag our grand daughter through a gruesome fight, I could go up to writing her a check each month for $1,500.00 to ensure her and the baby had a decent apartment in a good neighborhood.

She chose to and relishes, like her father raised her, to make this a life long battle.

Some people, male and female alike, are prong to fight, to lash out, to hurt everyone in their path because they are tortured souls.

Guys, again, think with the head on your shoulders before you get involved with any woman. Making a baby is a legally binding contract and it will be a monkey on your back for 18 years.

Watch how your "princess" treats her enemies, does she have a lot of enemies, my ex daughter in law seems to fight with everyone, her land lady, her many bosses, her co-workers, she cannot get along with anyone. Is she able to compromise or does she have to always have the final word?

My son blindly chose her because "she was a knock out beauty" blonde, thin and mean as they come.

Do not judge someone on the basis of looks, you can always get plastic surgery - look into a person's heart.

Are they kind and intellegent.........those are the key words.

The choices you make, when it comes to mating with and having a baby can and will affect many people. You, your lover, the child, your parents, your mates parents and your brothers and sisters.

Before you marry someone, live with them for awhile and make sure you both are compatible before dragging a child into the world.

We have almost 50% of marriages and millions of key latch kids all over America, sad, lost and rejected kids.

I speak from experience.

People need to grow up and get their act together before having a child.

reply to post by leo123


Simply not biologically true. Down's doesn't come from the male contribution. Lots of men have had children later in life. Many women have had children into their 50s.