posted on May, 13 2008 @ 09:57 AM
I have to admit, something good can come of such an alarmist article, even if it is based on the nonsensical acceptance of an instant
click-survey; I am referring of course to this very debate.
I must object to this kind of thing because the words 'findings' and 'survey' bely the accuracy of the opinion embedded in the article. Also,
because the viewer of such 'reports' is usually not in a position to discuss the so-called 'finding' and are usually more inclined to accept it
as fact. Hence my immediate call for caution regarding something that, in its construction, contributes to a perception. This perception is
destructive and demeaning and is circular in that it creates the very 'distrust' in the institution of marriage, thus weakening it by process of
'self-fulfilling prophecy.'
I am passionate on this subject because I have children, and I am fairly certain that they believe that marriage is a viable and desirable potential
facet of adult life.
I can't sit idly by while the media spins the illusion that marriage is a convenient way to go 'steady' and it's not really a commitment for life.
Most of the youth seem to think that divorce is perfectly acceptable way to deal with a problem in a marriage. But logic would follow, 'Then, why
marry at all?' Indeed, why marry? If you cant trust yourself or your spouse, why do you marry? What was the 'real' reason?
For many of our young ladies, it's societal programming, the 'big day' and the 'Cinderella wedding' and all that. For our young men its a social
convention tied to the image of success in later life.
That's the medias contribution to the mix. Ever watch 'soap operas'? Do you pay attention to children's programming on the ubiquitous TV? What
is the 'projected' norm? Now follow up with the 'written' works of media..., like the OP piece.
What if, in the middle of the 8th inning when the game is all but lost, the team walks off the field, would that be OK? Never! When the team loses,
you don't blame the game, you blame the team (so to speak)
Yet marriage is NOT a game, now matter who you 'think' you are, and how 'cool' your spouse is with it. The problem is people love the IDEA but
when the game stops being 'fun' they want to 'change the channel.' Or some now wish to just 'pretend' their married, and highlighting their
'off' time by badmouthing their spouses or telling stories to entertain others (our audience.)
Yes, I think the institution of marriage has been corrupted by those who have taken it upon themselves to 'use' it as entertainment. They offer us
the perspective that there should be a laugh track and some inspirational or romantic music playing in the background of our lives, despite the
patently unreal aspect of what that means (having a 'directed' life.)
At the end of the tirade, it's about children, that's what marriage is about. Yes, this is my opinion, and yes this is a generalization, but I hate
the flippant attitude that the social contract is to be viewed as a 'business' deal. That is quite distinctly what skews our children's
understanding of a life long commitment to honor and cherish another person is about.
What message is here for them? Is it true that the institution of marriage is failing, or are we failing the institution of marriage?
[edit on 13-5-2008 by Maxmars]