Over Sensitive - AKA Wearing Your Heart On Your Sleeve

Originally posted by UmbraSumus
Could you give me an example of a scenario where you are accused of being over

I do not get it much now, however I used to, or it could be I do not hear it now. I have selective hearing these days. However I am not dating, and stuff like this, I have the same people in my life and now I vibrate in a manner that only certain people get in the door.

I will try to think of a case. I am a little confused, did I sound like victim here in this video?

I mean I had my buddy watch the video and he did not think that, he thought it was level headed and represented his experience as well, and is it impossible for a person who is mid forties to be able to identify with something without being a victim of something?

I am just confused how this post has all become about me, and my reactions to something. It is about in a forum post a moderater feeling the need to quantify his sensitivity, and say he did not want to cater to sensitive people, and my point is what is too sensitive. Why did he have to say that, did he feel he would be attacked for being sensitive to the sensitive people?

I am kind of disappointed, it seems like people did not watch it, or have misunderstood, I might have to go back to the drawing board.

reply to post by SoulOrb


I did watch your video .

It is just i have no reference point , no star to sail by , if you will.

Before anyone can say whether something is an "overly" sensitive response , details would help to establish some form of baseline.

My understanding of the term overly sensitive , would include the other end of the mood spectrum also i.e rage /anger.

How does this heightened sensitivity manifest it ? Do people read it in your body language , do you interject with your opinion , do you leave the scene upset ?

The devils in the details.

I assume that Bill is trying to be fair to all. His statement is not some relation of a personal issue or fear. He, through experience, simply understands that some people will take criticisms personally instead of professionally. The saying goes, “Life is ten percent what happens to you and ninety percent what you choose to do about it.”

In professional circles, most of the posters here would be fired for the accusations that they claim within their presented so called “facts”. As well, newspapers cannot make such claims about aliens, reptiles, ghosts or whatnot without carefully examining the facts before presenting them. On ATS ,however, it can be perceived that “anything goes” in posting so long as you do not directly attack another posters. Can you imagine how frustrating it might be for an owner of this site to see all the wild posts on here that present the most outlandish information without even attempting to provide any credibility whatsoever? As well, when posters do attempt to provide whatever facts are available about a given topic other replies do nothing but trash and belittle the source of the information no matter how credible it may be.

All in all, I imagine that moderating such a forum as this that presents such kinds of out of the box ideas can be utterly frustrating. Especially when out of the box thinkers can be very “sensitive” to criticism, no matter how professional and factual based that criticism is presented.

It is entirely understandable what Bill what talking about. I think that you, and others, have apparently taken offense to his statement because you are taking his statement to be directed at you personally. You perceived him to be attacking “Sensitive” people, instead of taking his statement exactly the way that he wrote it. I think that you are simply attempting to bait him into responding personally to you because you took what he said as directed towards you.

Originally posted by SoulOrb
I am a little confused, did I sound like victim here in this video?

I mean I had my buddy watch the video and he did not think that, he thought it was level headed and represented his experience as well, and is it impossible for a person who is mid forties to be able to identify with something without being a victim of something?

For what it's worth, I didn't think you sounded like a victim in the video either. And yes, many find it impossible to identify with something unless you are a victim. Unfortunate, but true.

I am just confused how this post has all become about me, and my reactions to something.

Probably because you used a personal story in the video to make your point, and say that you personally have been told that you are overly sensitive.

I only realized after reading this post that I didn't make it clear in my last one that when I said "you" I meant the general you and not specifically you yourself. I'll edit my previous post to make it clearer what I meant.

Why did he have to say that, did he feel he would be attacked for being sensitive to the sensitive people?

While I can't be certain since I'm not SO, I believe that you have to take that statement in the context of the previous thread about the situation. Many people here apparently see criticism, harsh questioning, or disagreement as a personal attack and send in complaints about it. In one thread he pointed out that none of those are personal attacks, then in the recent thread he was discussing the negativity that has steadily been getting worse to the point where the site is practically drowning in it.

I believe that the point he was making by saying he wasn't pandering to or coddling the overly sensitive was that while criticism, harsh questioning, and/or disagreement are not personal attacks, there has been a rising level of negativity. So it's not that he is coddling those who complain any time their assertions are criticized, he wants to lower the overall negativity before we all drown in it. That was what I got from it at any rate.

I am kind of disappointed, it seems like people did not watch it, or have misunderstood, I might have to go back to the drawing board.

I watched and understood your video, and I posted responses I felt to be in line with the topic of being overly sensitive.

reply to post by SoulOrb


Dude, I am just messing with you. I dont mean any real offense. Sorry that I took your bait. I couldnt resist. You do whatever it is that makes you happy just please limit any whining in my presence. I have a daughter that whines until my brain is about to explode

reply to post by SoulOrb


While it takes all types of people to keep the world moving overly sensitive people really do drive me nuts. I believe that these people that wear their hearts on their sleeves, that are oversensitive, that demand that you adjust your life to them because their life is 'perfect' and their way is 'right', really are just self centered and arrogant. They tend to be whiny too...

Damn; whiners bug...

reply to post by justsomeboreddude


obviously you have experience dealing with an oversensitive person in your life, as is evident by your speach. Whos the crybaby in your life?

SoulOrb, I think you're a pretty brave person -- you've put at least two vids of yourself here, and that's a hell of a lot more than I would ever consider doing. I haven't had a chance to look them over, but am inspired to do so.

Be yourself, enjoy life the way that you see it and to hell with other peoples impressions. The older I get, the less I care about others' judgements. Listen, my Bride and I ride our tandem trike on weekend, on an island where nobody else but us wears helmets. Bright red trike, 84" long, two bright orange helmets -- Pee Wee Herman's wet dream. She BEGGED me not to install the optional orange wavey flag. Point is, people laugh as we ride by and others think it is really silly. We're just happy to do our own thing and there are worse things than spreading a little laughter whereever you go.

Sensitive is a problem only if YOU think it is. My opinion.;


Cheers

Originally posted by Hot_Wings
You perceived him to be attacking “Sensitive” people, instead of taking his statement exactly the way that he wrote it. I think that you are simply attempting to bait him into responding personally to you because you took what he said as directed towards you.

I think you are trouble maker and probably a bully when you were young. If I took offence, I would just say so, I do not need you to translate for me, and to be honest this whole thing about a board and the proof, is a boon dongle.

Look, it is my experience. On my channel, I have other people share their experience, who are willing to of course. If you take exception to my experience, well, keep your reality.

I am saying exactly what I said in the video. I have no hidden thoughts, I liked his post, and if you took the time to read what I posted to that article you would see that. I am simply saying that he had a need to tell other people through that post that he was not going to pander to the over sensitive people, and honestly, I feel bad that he even had to say that.

However, when you have people who like to put words in others mouths like a dog sneaking in to steal the food out of another dogs dish, well, I can see now why he said it.

So I do not need you to decipher or translate anything, and you are completely wrong crap disturber. Man oh man, when will people just accept what a person says and not decipher it.

Originally posted by argentus
Herman's wet dream. She BEGGED me not to install the optional orange wavey flag.

Point is, people laugh as we ride by and others think it is really silly. We're just happy to do our own thing and there are worse things than spreading a little laughter

Way to go, I am thinking about that flag, and I read your post to my roommate who is a biker and he got a laugh.

Well you know, if I did not act on inspiration and make a video, I would not hear interesting stories, and I have gotten alot of mail from this video in private messages, and the comments were very nice, thank you everyone.

Look, I got inspired, I did a video, it is that simple. I really have nothing to take issue with anyone, I am used as a diving rod alot, I just go with the flow. I am in some sort of energy group here, and I really don't know what the heck I am doing.

Keep up the great work, if the # hits the fan hopefully the ET's have room for the bike.



[edit on 6-5-2009 by SoulOrb]

Originally posted by clcreek
oversensitive, that demand that you adjust your life to them because their life is 'perfect' and their way is 'right', really are just self centered and arrogant. They tend to be whiny

Well, I think you will find the Over Sensitives don't want insensitives to do anything but keep their mouth shut or be polite when they open it.

Other than that, I fail to see what the issue it. Control their impulses and keep the attack on some kind of civil level and do not make personal, and not rip them apart just because they choose not to wear the same armour you obviously have chosen to wear.


[edit on 6-5-2009 by SoulOrb]

I am just confused how this post has all become about me, and my reactions to something. It is about in a forum post a moderator feeling the need to quantify his sensitivity, and say he did not want to cater to sensitive people, and my point is what is too sensitive. Why did he have to say that, did he feel he would be attacked for being sensitive to the sensitive people?

I am simply answering your questions in the most logical and truthful manner that I can. Once again, you are taking what others have said as personal attacks upon you. In response, you are now personally attacking me by stating that I “must have been a bully” and that I am a “trouble maker.”

I have simply analyzed your actions, not your personal childhood history, or you as a person as you have wrongly done to me. You asked for answers to questions. I provided to you what I perceived to be the answers. If you take this personally, then it is upon you, and I wish you the best until we should debate topics again.

[edit on 6-5-2009 by Hot_Wings]

Just my two cents and the words of my tai chi teacher. A "highly sensitive person"...when the time comes makes a formidable and sly warrior. Don't underestimate them. Ever.

I just watched your vid from this thread SoulOrb, and I gotta say, I'm pretty impressed....... I don't see anything that screams 'victim' about it, and I'm impressed how you look at the camera all the time, and your excellent points just roll out. Well done.

By the way, I recognize that backdrop that you use in your video. That's 1972. I'd know it anywhere.

Yeah, the wavy flag; ya gotta love it huh? After Hurricane Paloma wrecked this place last year, I used the trike to go get gasoline for the generator, shop for groceries, go fishing, even made a little trailer for it to haul lumber. It's like me........ not very fast, but heavy work.

Cheers...... will check out your other vid soon. Good thread.

Originally posted by JennaI watched and understood your video, and I posted responses I felt to be in line with the topic of being overly sensitive.

Wow, what a great reply Jenna, I need to be careful around you, you will whip me in shape in no time, and such a non personal attack. Wow. I am still absorbing the reply.

Ok here is a few examples, but I need to use one of my roommates who I just asked if I could.

ROOMATES
He met at woman he met on a dating site at a local park for walk on the second meet. So she gets relaxed, and the starts talking about mama's boys. And she stops and says, "You are not a Mama's boy are you?" It kind of floored him, and he had to put himself in a reflective moment and it in his words like shoving him into a wall, and it seemed to be so accusatory. Now this was harmless, and how did she know that there was issues from childhood to do with his Mother, and is still healing from that. However basically it did not have to be said, in that manner. And what is a Mama's boy anyway, it is anyway, it is just some term of judgement. It kind of put a damper on the date, and well anyway he realized she just too harsh for him.

ME
When I was 28 I separated. My Ex met a guy who was a real control freak and I could not see my kids. I would go month after month on visitation and no kids, and then I would go to court, and then I got one visit, and they moved, etc. So I was kind of depressed and missed my kids.

My new girlfriend once night, who had never had one kid and had no idea of the sense of loss and frustration of it all to have this person in control of your kids, and you cannot seem to get them to comply to court orders, and not only that he is harassing everyone you know, with the end goal to claim you do not love your kids to the courts and accuse you repeatedly of not showing up, thankfully I had police incident reports, hoping to eventually adopt them and get me to abandon them.

Anyway I go outside one night, and I am there by myself crying my eyes out, I had to do that say every 3 months to just keep the emotions in check, because I was about one step away from getting in my car and killing the guy. He would taunt me repeatedly on the few times I got a visit hoping I would lose my cool, and then they could put a peace bond on me, so I took alot of #, but at night I tossed and turned over it.

So I am there, and she comes out and says, 'oh for gods sake you are wearing your heart on your sleeve, get over it, what the hell are you crying for. Just go up there and confront the guy. Like I am there, thinking, who the hell are you, you never had a child let alone three children who you cannot see, who you love dearly. And confront, I wish I could, I wish I could just take the guy to the woods, however I would not see my kids again. It was not a good night, and that one comment see eventually unraveled that relationship.

So, see what these people forget is that we do not see the other person. When I was 35 I had a stroke. And for about 2 years I lost certain words in context. And so after a few years I must have remapped most of the problems and now I think I do pretty good. Yet sometimes I will use the wrong word, like just a minute ago I used the word "your" instead of the word "my" in a note, and had to edit. I have idea what is wrong with the wiring that I do that, I just laugh about it. Yet to this day I get comments, you worded this wrong, or like you type that wrong. I do not both to tell them, look buddy I was 3 seconds away from being incapacitated for life, I could care less about mispelling a few words or editing a video to take out one mis-spoken word. I just accept that they are idots, and that if they ever have a stroke, an event I wish on no one, then lets see how well they do.

I was in the washroom the other day. Since I was about 37 I need to sit down to piss. Basically my bladder dropped and pinched off my Uretha, and the choices are to get an operation or take medication. So if I go out drinking I need to sit down to piss, cause it is just too painful to stand up, and I am blocked off. And if I drink too much I need to be careful because there is a point I need to go to the hospital and get it releaved with a tube.

However there is always some guy my age or younger, jock of the walk, who comes in and for some reason he is listening to me piss sitting down, and then makes a comment often to me over the stall, like what the frig. What the hell is it his business, so I come out quietly and go up and say, look, I piss in 10 streams because I have 10% of the urine pressure of a frigging male, ad the floor would be pretty messed if I stand up, but if it makes you happy, I will piss all over the floor next time.

And I do not tell people in my life this crap unless they ask. Most of my friends never knew I had a stroke. A buddy, 48 was yanging on about passing some blood the other day from an infection. I quietly supported him but it would not stop, and every time was about him having to sit down, and on and on, and I finally said, we have known each other 13 years right. I said did I ever one feel the need to have you know I have to sit down and piss everytime? He said no. I said fine, ok, I am sorry you need to sit to piss like me, but honestly, lets go have a nice night.

So you see, I put this post here, because I have been there. I have received my due share of comments and I had handled them gracefully. However sometimes there are people not as strong as myself mentally, and they might get one of these idots some night and go home and kill themselves. And these idiots have no idea they did it. And that is why over sensitive does not exist, because there are some things that people will not tell other people. And there are some people like myself that will sacrifice everthing to make the point of others.

So if you are a twit with a insensitive mouth, look, other people have problems just like you. If you want to be critical, ask a few questions first, like excuse me sir, are you ok in there, is there a medical problem etc., before you hollar over the stall.


[edit on 6-5-2009 by SoulOrb]

[edit on 6-5-2009 by SoulOrb]

Originally posted by UmbraSumus
reply to post by SoulOrb

 

The devils in the details.

Yes the devil is in the details. About 20 years ago I had a very realistic dream when I was running with my kids and family away from a jeep with a red Chinese star on the side. they were chasing us and trying to shoot me and my kids dead because we were a target to be destroyed. To this day I can remember the terror of it all.

And then I read someone here say, "well what choice do we have but to do this", and I think buddy if you had my dream you would be more sympathetic to the situation.

That is right, you do not have contrast for sensitivity, no one does until it is them. And see that is the problem, here in North America we have never had to live in fear day and night of a bomb dropping through the roof.

Or of a group of solders breaking down the door cause they got the wrong address and think the husband is a terrorist, and stand there with a M16 12 inches from the childrens face while screaming in a foreign language while you huddle in the dark with no lights or food, possibly because someone in a government 12000 miles away took out buildings and framed people with the same color skin as you, so that they could take down their own government, while the blind patriots are here instead of on the streets hauling their mad dogs back in. Some of which are on private contract by the way, with no sworn allegiance, who are basically thugs for hire.

I will say this, I hope the hell I am wrong and there is no such thing as consciousness or a God, or Judgement, or group consciousness, because if there is, us people here in North America have a real wallop heading our way. I suspect people will be more sensitive then.

Insensitivity? Need examples. I am sorry but honestly you are not looking too far. Sorry, I am just saying you seem like a good person, but honestly, if you need the real thing, get on a plane and head there. I can imagine it quite well thank you, this needs to end sometime, and I will post more and more videos if I can just get a little more compassion for just one person.

Thank you for watching.