I can't take much more

a reply to: chr0naut

Damn. I hate cancer. It took my son.

So sorry to hear that.

My mom is begging me not to wallow in sorrow, she says she is old and has lived a full life.
I feel utterly selfish for not being able to imagine my life without her.
I’ve talked to her almost every day for the last few decades.
My heart is hurting so bad.

originally posted by: JAGStorm
a reply to: JAGStorm

I’ve lost another member of my family to pancreatic cancer. It happened so fast we were not prepared...My mind is cloudy and I know I am not thinking clearly.

I know this wasn't directed at me, but was reading and just wanted to share this. It isn't an answer to your question. But it has helped me. My family has seen a number of people die in the past few months that have been very close. And it has been painful.

Every morning I've been getting up and watching this video. It has been really peaceful and helped me, I hope you don't mind my sharing:

The New World to Come

a reply to: JAGStorm

Be there; be positive; be yourself.

You don't know what tomorrow will bring any more than she does. Understand that it will be hard, but if you give up, she can't fight for you and herself too.

So make things as normal as possible for as long as you can and be there.

a reply to: JAGStorm

Sorry to hear. Lost my grandmother to cancer.

Keep your head up.

a reply to: JAGStorm


I’m sorry dear Jag.

Spend as much time as you can with her. I have prayed for you both. God Bless you both 😢


Please take care of yourself too! 💙

a reply to: JAGStorm

Sorry to hear she has cancer all over. But it sounds like she actually enjoyed her life anyway. She sounds like she is pretty old already, hopefully she can see everyone and give them hugs and kisses before she passes away.

My wife's friend is in her mid eighties, she almost died a few times over the last two years. Once from too much medication that was making her weak, she had the doctors remove half of them and is feeling a lot better now. She called the wife this morning and I answered, I asked her how she was doing and she said the isolation is making her crazy....she wants to start going to knitting with all the knitters again, so does my wife. She got on zoom yesterday with the knitting crew but said it is nowhere near the same and wants to just get together with everyone again before she winds up in a nursing home for good. She loves to socialize and without that she said she may as well be dead....she would be less bored if she was dead. Quality of life is important, especially if you are old and haven't got much left....stuck in a house for six months is hell, you have not got that much quality life left, enjoy it while you can. I know so many people who got frail and are living in nursing homes now or have died from frailty. Or they fall, another problem that occurs from taking too much meds and restricting salt too much.

I think your grandma knows it is time to cash in her chips, hopefully they let you guys visit if she is close by.

How much time do they give her?

a reply to: rickymouse

How much time do they give her?

Find out on Monday.

a reply to: XXXN3O

I lost my mother a couple of years back and it made me numb for the past few years to say the least... only just understanding it now. I never got the chance to tell her how I felt and we had a tough relationship to say the least. Speak your heart if you need too

My mom and I are as close as it get. No regrets.

My siblings not so much, they are in shock.

a reply to: JAGStorm

Many years ago I was in your situation. My father and me.

I remember the night l cried asking God what to do, after doctors gave up.

I woke up next morning remembering one day my dad told me he'd like to meet my sister's son.

2 days traveling, they met.

Give your mom quality of life. Find something she always wanted.

a reply to: JAGStorm

Can I just say that it's weird, yet oddly comforting that I can share some of these feelings on here.

originally posted by: JAGStorm
a reply to: chr0naut

Damn. I hate cancer. It took my son.

So sorry to hear that.

My mom is begging me not to wallow in sorrow, she says she is old and has lived a full life.
I feel utterly selfish for not being able to imagine my life without her.
I’ve talked to her almost every day for the last few decades.
My heart is hurting so bad.

That was my grandmother's attitude. She first had breast cancer and then she got lung cancer. I think she held on about 10 years from first diagnosis. She did chemo, etc. However, after awhile she basically said "Fnck it... let's get this over with" and stopped treatment. She was pretty chipper about it in a strange sort of way. I'll never forget going to see her at hospice and she didn't even look all that sick. Just like her normal jovial self. She passed maybe a week later. I think she was 79 or 80.

All I can say is just spend as much time with her and relish those visits.

It sucks, but is also a reality and inevitable. It is something we all will have to deal with at some point. My mother is 76, advanced stage MS, diabetes, early dementia... I swear every time the phone rings I think it is the call.

originally posted by: JAGStorm
a reply to: chr0naut

Damn. I hate cancer. It took my son.

So sorry to hear that.

My mom is begging me not to wallow in sorrow, she says she is old and has lived a full life.
I feel utterly selfish for not being able to imagine my life without her.
I’ve talked to her almost every day for the last few decades.
My heart is hurting so bad.

For prevention of pancreatic cancer consuming parsley flakes and other high apigenin foods helps to stop it from forming. Sage also has lots of it, but not as much as parsley. Plus parsley does go good with Parmesan noodles. Oregano works too, the parsley family has lots of herbs in it. Also some fruits contain apigenin and leutinen and Fistin which all help to keep cancer at bay before it gets bad. Celery also has some in it, especially the leaves.

www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov...

www.frontiersin.org...

www.researchgate.net...

There must be fifty articles on this chemistry associated with cancer in scientific articles. And parsley and oregano go good in lots of foods. Now, by itself, it would be hard for apigenin to cure full blown cancer, but it is supposed to work as a good immunotherapy med to keep full blown cancer from becoming a problem. It is better not to get cancer than to have to take expensive and invasive chemo drugs.

It is not just an adjuvant chemistry for chemo meds, it does actually destroy cancer cells on it's own, but if the cancer is already progressed to a high level, it does not work.

a reply to: Edumakated

I swear every time the phone rings I think it is the call.

100% I can't even tell you how accurate that is.
We went through it with my in laws too.

originally posted by: KTemplar
a reply to: JAGStorm


I’m sorry dear Jag.

Spend as much time as you can with her. I have prayed for you both. God Bless you both 😢


Please take care of yourself too! 💙

Thank you so much!

a reply to: rickymouse

Thank you, I'm going to look at all those links.
I do love parsley and celery and grow them organically.

Really Sorry Jag, had a few scares with my Dad (only parent left) and though we been lucky so far, those times absolutely took it out of me!

I lost my Mam suddenly, no warning, we were so so close! and I would give anything and I mean anything for one more day with her, so much was left unsaid, and I was too young to deal with it properly.

Spend every second with her Jag!

Sending thoughts and prayers your way! 😥

Look after yourself!

our condolences

originally posted by: JAGStorm
a reply to: JAGStorm

I’ve lost another member of my family to pancreatic cancer. It happened so fast we were not prepared...

For those that have gone through this, what advice do you have for me. My mind is cloudy and I know I am not thinking clearly.

What do you regret, what do you wish you would have done.?????

Just be you. All we have is the time we are allotted. Tell her ALL the things. Let her know how much you love her and she influenced your life.

Tell her that ATS loves her because of who you are.

originally posted by: JAGStorm
a reply to: JAGStorm

Can I just say that it's weird, yet oddly comforting that I can share some of these feelings on here.

You’re always welcome here. You made this what it is. Long time now have I followed your true words and thorough lines of thought.

Your mother raised you well. We are all better for it

originally posted by: JAGStorm
a reply to: chr0naut

Damn. I hate cancer. It took my son.

So sorry to hear that.

My mom is begging me not to wallow in sorrow, she says she is old and has lived a full life.
I feel utterly selfish for not being able to imagine my life without her.
I’ve talked to her almost every day for the last few decades.
My heart is hurting so bad.

A positive attitude is helpful. Hope makes the hardest things in life less hard, for everyone. And who knows, the 'new agey' types say that positive thoughts can influence things positively. It is definitely a real and present help.

but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint. Isaiah 40:31

For in this hope we were saved. But hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what they already have? Romans 8:24