The Banter Cafe, open 24hrs

PS. What's all this banter about B. Johnson. Is the government trying to sneak something in under the radar?
Anyway I'm off to bed now, goodnight all.

originally posted by: crayzeed
a reply to: CornishCeltGuy
But did they have condensed milk sandwiches. I think todays condensed milk has got runnier as it used to be thicker to spread and stay on a sandwich.
Put Donovans Mellow Yellow on the box for me.

Never tried that, will do now!
Top tune choice dude

a reply to: crayzeed

Are you simmering the can first?

To make dulce de leche without even opening the can, first remove the label from a sweetened condensed milk can and place it in the center of a pan. Fill the pan with lukewarm water, then bring the water to a simmer. Let the can simmer for 2 hours to make a light sauce or 3 hours to make a thick sauce, and be sure to check on the can every 30 minutes to prevent scorching. Once it’s finished, remove the can from the water and let it cool down before opening.

Linky

TISWAS!

Condensed Milk Sandwiches For Dinner

a reply to: oldcarpy


Slow in here today. As a lawyer I often come across some interesting cases so I thought I would share this one, as it is Friday and all:

Wile E Coyote v ACME Co.

originally posted by: oldcarpy
a reply to: oldcarpy


Slow in here today. As a lawyer I often come across some interesting cases so I thought I would share this one, as it is Friday and all:

Wile E Coyote v ACME Co.

Speaking for ACME Co. I'd say he was the negligent one for ordering more products (to the tune of 84 more times - crazy person?) after the first one failed. ha ha

I submit Mr. Coyote had a death wish.

Grandson sitting again today.
I've just been dragged round to the abomination that is McDonalds - Happy Meal with a crappy toy.
Chicken salad for the big guy...did it myself and I've got to say it was very nice.

Going to have a few Jacobs crackers with Marks and Sparks Belgian Pate a bit later.

Then I guess it'll be pub o'clock again.

Didn't know you were a lawyer carpy - what's your take on the Ben Stokes case?
I suspect he's looking at a stretch....shame, the knobheads deserved what they got but in the eye's of the law I think he looks pretty much guilty.

a reply to: Freeborn
Didn't you know he was a lawyer? How do you think he keeps himself so fit, chasing ambulances to hospital is strenuous work!
He's currently helping me with a judicial review over some posts I had deleted on ATS...we're going for defamation of character, and loss of income due to the stress and anxiety of being unreasonably censored. He reckons I'm looking at millions, but his fees are pretty high, we agreed a 70/30 cut (to him) but I can't complain, no other legal beagle would take my case on.

originally posted by: CornishCeltGuy
a reply to: Freeborn
Didn't you know he was a lawyer? How do you think he keeps himself so fit, chasing ambulances to hospital is strenuous work!
He's currently helping me with a judicial review over some posts I had deleted on ATS...we're going for defamation of character, and loss of income due to the stress and anxiety of being unreasonably censored. He reckons I'm looking at millions, but his fees are pretty high, we agreed a 70/30 cut (to him) but I can't complain, no other legal beagle would take my case on.

a reply to: InTheLight


Indeed. It is called "Contributory Negligence". But when dealing with US law and lawsuits I wouldn't have a clue. They all seem to just shout "OBJECTION!" at each other a lot.

a reply to: CornishCeltGuy


I think you misunderstood. When I said you would be looking at millions....I was referring to my bill.

Reminds me, must bill you for the advice on what to put on the jukebox, how to cook Carbonara, how nice marmalade is with bacon etc, etc.

It's 99% of lawyers that give the rest of us a bad name. Got to go, I think I heard an ambulance.....

a reply to: Freeborn


Ben Stokes - I don't do crime but I know enough to know that as we have not seen all the evidence we can't form a proper opinion. Just going on blind prejudice mind, he's guilty as hell. And Affray is a pretty serious charge.

a reply to: oldcarpy
Haha!
It was never about the money for me though, just to clear my name and to set a precedent so no other members of ATS suffer at the hands of mods abusing their powers...honest lol
Thing is though I 'sold' my home on paper to my son years ago so legally I have no assets, even the 'Banter Cafe' is in my lads name as sole trader so I just 'rent' the premises and equipment - all on paper and sewn up tight legally.
You can charge your fees as much as you like but you'll be lucky going through the civil/high court to get it. All transactions are cash here, net profit declared to HMRC is around £100 per week, so I imagine you'll get £10 a week out of me at best lol.

originally posted by: oldcarpy
a reply to: InTheLight


Indeed. It is called "Contributory Negligence". But when dealing with US law and lawsuits I wouldn't have a clue. They all seem to just shout "OBJECTION!" at each other a lot.

So, the same confusion reigns.

a reply to: CornishCeltGuy


You are making the mistake of thinking I would be going through the Courts to recover my fees. There are....other... ways of extracting money from scrotes like you!

I Fought the Law - brilliant. Tom Petty did a good cover of that too.

In the Royal Courts of Justice in London someone wrote in the bog - "I fought the law and the law won".

a reply to: InTheLight


Yes, but over here we are more polite about it.

Judge: "I'm afraid after hearing your submissions, I am none the wiser".

Counsel: "Perhaps not, my Lord, but hopefully you are better informed".

a reply to: oldcarpy
Haha, bring it son!
Once you cross the Tamar you are in the forbidden lands where there is a permanent place in the moors for every lawyer who enjoys nature.
Next to no cops around here, and curiously never any witnesses
[/evil laugh]
Tom Petty's version is pretty good ...PMSL at graffiti in the RCJ toilet!

a reply to: CornishCeltGuy


No cops around, eh? Just how Knuckles and Crusher like it.....

Here is another great case involving Private Eye:

Arkell v Pressdram

I often respond to other firms with "My response to your client's claim is identical to that in the case of Arkell v Pressdram".

a reply to: oldcarpy
My advice to your goons, wear authentic Cornish smocks, chew a wheat stalk, and carry a flagon of scrumpy or they won't get past the PBF ( Pixie Border Force).
You Wiltshire boys haven't a clue, they'll be sacrificed to the our most holy Lord Pasty in one of our many stone circles.
You may have the biggest circles down your way, but we are many, we are the cider legion...