So now flirting or asking a girl out is sexual harassment

I can't believe it's 2017 and people still need an explanation of what sexual harrassment is and why it's wrong. Bill O'Reilly was not simply asking women out, Hannity if what his accuser is saying is true, was not simply asking her out. They were being pigs.

There's a way to flirt either romantically or sexually without being disgusting and this goes for all people because some men don't like to be told what a woman wants to do to him in explicit terms either. If you aren't into someone and they make lewd gestures or conversation with you it's gross and awkward. If you make it out to be like their job depends on whether they go out with you or have sex with you, that is sexual harassment.

You guys (addressing the straight men in the thread who are butthurt) need to imagine that you work for someone that looks like Hillary Clinton and she keeps grabbing your crotch and telling you how ready she is for you. Gross right? Not something you want to deal with when you're just trying to earn a living, right?

And OP... you mentioned cat calling. Has that honestly ever worked for you? Cat calling has only ever made me think 'ew'.

originally posted by: moebius

originally posted by: slider1982
FFS, work place romance is as old as the dinosaurs, lots of people in a office talking all day sooner or later you will find some freak that wants to wear a leather dog face gimp mask and be pee'd on like a fire hydrant.. BUT current culture makes the straight "white?" man public enemy number one, you will get slaughtered from all sides be it the feminazis or the crazy liberal bastards that will already look at you like a rapist..


It is this "western" trait that is now prevalent why I do not think I would ever date a western women or even bother with a advance, just to many bat # crazy liars that know how easy it is to "catch" you out, think about that FB message you sent 15 years ago that will be used as ammo.

FFS, abuse of authority for the purpose of sexual coercion is as old as the dinosaurs.

I will not speak with 97% of my work place colleagues due to their utter level liberal w@nk meter, god forbid you tell a "racy" joke that will be your career over for bringing "extreme" unappropriate sexual contented views into the safe space....


Crap like this has me pulling myself out of society and why I only have a handful of real friends that I have vetted over the years for their level of logic and mental stability....



RA

FFS, abuse of authority for the purpose of sexual coercion is as old as the dinosaurs.

How dare those "feminazis or the crazy liberal bastards" speak up against it.

At no point did I say anything about abuse of authority, my post was regarding "work place romance" and how the current climate we live in treats such things, there was no direct statement or claim to someone using "power" to gain sexual gratification..

RA

What's the correct word?

Oh, right: Consent.

And if your animal instincts (read: ID) are that controlling over you; you apologize, sincerely, and not throw power and money at your screw up.

originally posted by: ItCameFromOuterSpace
a reply to: namelesss

Trump's crotch-grabber comment was commentary on what some women will allow a wealthy man to do. Or get away with. And well... women don't like being called out on their own b.s. Being offended by the comment speaks volumes.

The thing here is, you don't know for sure until you've done it. You've assumed. She may have been into you right up until that moment you assumed, too.

It's the age-old 'casting-couch'-type scenario.

Yes some men use their position to take advantage of women in the workplace. But there are also women who will use sex to advance themselves in the workplace. It's been going on since humans were invented.

And realistically, wherever there are numbers of males and females together for most of their waking hours there will always be flirting and affairs and attractions etc. It's nature. People can't help what comes natural.

The only way to totally eliminate such behaviours is to not hire humans.

a reply to: doobydoll

Nah, we can eliminate the behavior by following the law. As I posted earlier, it's part of the law in regards to sexual harassment. You might as well say that since killing is a part of nature, people can't help killing other people since it comes naturally.

a reply to: xstealth

Bill is just a pig. He is pretty hated so all these women see this opportunity-the stupid Fox people paid out 13 million-big mistake. But Bill is still a jerk-good riddance. Probably karma-ask his ex and daughter.

I'll tell yous one more, pretty funny but at the same time quite disgusting story...

I was working in a hotel as a maintenance tech - again, middle-aged housekeeping supervisor was very lewd and seemed to focus a lot of attention on me in particular.

By this time I'm late 20's...a bit more cocky and brash, so I'd humour her. I'd play along, be kinda flirty and have a laugh. to me it was just a bit of fun, and that's how it was for a couple of years.

Then, one day I had to fit a curtain rail in a bedroom. So I'm on a ladder and in comes this housekeeping supervisor with one of the maids, and I'm on the ladder screwing this curtain rail into the ceiling void at the window.

She came over and stood beside me, was chatting away, next thing she got really close...now imagine this, her head is right at my groin, and she was practically inches away and she said something, can't remember what but it got my attention and I looked round and down at her...

She then started to rock her head back and forward while making mock gurgling/gagging noises and her maid friend started to giggle. It was at this point I started to worry and I think she saw it...it wasn't banter any more.

I was in a room with two women who were treating me like the proverbial sexual object. I made it clear I wasn't amused and they both left, laughing. Later I told a friend and he agreed that it was worrying - for the first time I realised just how dangerous my job could be.

She didn't mean any real harm and nothing was said about it again, but thinking about it later I started to worry about being left alone in a bedroom with female members of staff. I'm not really a good looking guy, I look young, though.

I reckon that's why older women seem to be attracted to me, it's that maternal thing, they wanna mother me or something. But it's scary, had she been a bitch she might not have liked my reaction so much and could have accused me of anything...particularly as I had no witnessed but she had a friend with her and they both found this to be highly amusing.

I ain't a prude, had she been younger and less filthy I might have taken an interest in her but she smacked of middle-aged desperation and didn't really do it for me.

But it's just another example of how the tables has flipped...I saw little to no sexual harrassment or evidence of any rape culture or patriarchy but I saw a lot of horny, crude older women being filthy as sin.

a reply to: xstealth

He asked the wrong girl out - she's an attorney according to wiki

wiki

Debbie Schlussel is an American attorney, author, political commentator, movie critic, and blogger.

a reply to: burgerbuddy

Agree. Every job I had in the 70s-80s I was sexually harrassed and I look like a school marm-married with two kids. A very shy, quiet person-but men didn't care. I have to say a number of aggressive women also flirted outrageously with him in the church choir.

I am older now and, thank God, divorced but this is going on everywhere-and it's not rape. It's called excessive, agressive flirting. Do we need classes on how to deal with it? Are there any more gentlemen and gentlewomen? I have no idea where this is leading-just our society.

After reading this much of the thread, I am convinced that some posters would agree that Bill Clinton should have lost his job as POTUS for sexual harassment of an intern in the workplace.

Unlimited sexual access for women and completely limited sexual access for men, by legal means if necessary, is the end game of the feminist idiocracy. That is the phase we are entering, where nature is completely reversed. Masculinised women, feminised men. Fat and Ugly is called beautiful, natural masculinity in men and beautiful slender femininity in women is evil. Feminist may pass and exercise judgement on one and all, but must never be judged themselves or subjected to the consequences of their actions.

There is one upside for men, lots of commitment free sex, for those with tools to play the game. I'll be poolside.

a reply to: HeathenJessie

She didn't mean any real harm and nothing was said about it again, but thinking about it later I started to worry about being left alone in a bedroom with female members of staff.

You handled that well...heavens knows that it could have backfired by her claiming sexual harassment because you refused her advances

Men here say that their right to try it on with any women is in danger and that therefore males are 'hated'.
As a woman I see it differently.
It is due to the internet and the anonymity that I realised just how many women hating males are out there. I mean scarily hating women, thinking they are all slags and hoes and feminazis.
I read the other day about the woman that was given the sack for refusing to wear high heeled shoes to work and the women haters came out en masse.
Comparing their safety boots and helmets to high heels.

However high heels shoes are just eye candy for men, there is no health and safety reason to wear them. I love them but not for a whole day at work. Please men, try it and get back to me.

Anyway. As a faithful loving wife, who treated work as just that a place to work. I was more than pissed off when guys try it on. I want to feel free at work to do my work stuff, without having to negotiate sexual advances from other males.

Lots of guys here say that flirting needs to be conserved and kept at work. I guess because it is fun for them.
Has it ever occurred to you that the one you choose to flirt with might feel uncomfortable?
I know I did. But then I usually make it clear to them. But I shouldn't have to.

And here is the difference. Flirting as in saying stupid things etc for a short try on, is annoying [to some, other women might just jump into bed with you] but constant pressure by someone who can give you the sack is really unfair to a woman who isn't interested.

If the male then still keeps on doing it it is bloody well harrassment. They only think about their own gratifications [need women to wear high heels at work - preferably stockings and suspenders..., want to be able to 'flirt' - which boils down to lewd language and propositions], they never think about how the female feels.

Jobs can be stressful enough without having another problem added to deal with, lying awake at night wondering how to deal with this without offending anyone and without getting the sack.

I had enough of [some] males thinking they are hard done by and who call us fmeinazis just because we want to be treated like humans and not sex dolls.

originally posted by: butcherguy
After reading this much of the thread, I am convinced that some posters would agree that Bill Clinton should have lost his job as POTUS for sexual harassment of an intern in the workplace.

Was that harrassment though? Who say's Bill was the one asking for it (I know he probably was)
Maybe she should have said no, and complained (and be found dead in North Dakota from sucide, shooting herself in the back of thead)

a reply to: xstealth

I am a single man.

If I am about leisurely activity, and happen to meet a woman who interests me, I can feel confident that asking for her number is not going to get me into trouble, since I am a gentleman, and I am hardly likely to approach the subject in a manner which is verbally offputting.

But I would never consider making an approach to an employee, on company time. I would also never consider approaching a woman of colour, and starting my attempt to get to know her as more than a colleague, by uttering anything remotely similar to "Hey, Hot Chocolate!"

O' Reilly is not on the skids because he did nothing wrong, but because he repeatedly did a great deal of things wrong, at work and otherwise. This therefore, has nothing to do with what a single man, about a single mans business as a man at leisure, in an after work setting might get up to, and has no bearing on consequences he might face.

You should check out "An Ear for Men" on YouTube... The guy explains alot about this sort of thing and often makes good points.

originally posted by: butcherguy
After reading this much of the thread, I am convinced that some posters would agree that Bill Clinton should have lost his job as POTUS for sexual harassment of an intern in the workplace.

Not even remotely the same thing. Monica Lewinski was a consenting and willing participant. The women Fox had to pay off for O'Reilly did not want the attention and wanted
It to cease. In O'Reilly's case, he apparently doesn't understand the meaning of "No".

a reply to: Kali74

It's an old (not good looking either) guy so she ain't interested, sure he's maybe a ''pig'' but he didn't touched her right? (as far as I know).
If it was a good looking younger guy who said it she perhaps even took it as a compliment.

So she didn't liked it..

Well what about some woman saying to a guy that he's ugly, fat... or perhaps that he won't ever get a woman.
That hurts also, perhaps even more.

I just see it kinda like it's not allowed to say the N word but blacks themself use it all the time! Whites cant say the N word!

Woman can say whatever and guys must watch out!!, they even can loose their job over it!

So why is sorry not enough? let him say sorry face to face... and lives goes on.. not a big deal imo.

a reply to: xstealth

There was more to this. He called and 'yelled at her' afterward. It became harassment at some point. Not particularly when he asked her out.