Is it cheating?

a reply to: Assassin82

With respect, and as a female, I have to say that you will NEVER understand what it is to be in her position. Just like I will never understand how it feels to be kicked in the balls.

No. This is not the definition of cheating. Flirting is borderline cheating and you are correct, enabling.

Cheating is verbal or physical intimacy between two parties behind another lover's back.

I know you're not looking for advice, but for future reference.. This is NOT worth your relationship/marriage if you're happy and she's happy.

There are things scores worse that could happen.

Your partner seems to be keeping it real with you. Id hang on to her.

If she does end up cheating (highly doubtful) she probably would call it quits with you not too long afterwards.

You know.. After reading some of the comments..

I see that many people are ver afraid to get hurt emotionally and feel pain or heartache.

To me, these feelings are what make us really feel alive. Dont be scared to love because of pain.

Love until it feels like a stake has been driven through your heart or until you feel empty. Then you know that you gave it all that you had.

Nothing wrong with living through experiences.

I definitely consider this cheating and all the info is there to draw this conclusion...

1. She flirted back
2. She never told you anything
3. She told you she didn't mind the attention

You see this, you know this... But unfortunately you are in love and you will make excuses and you have come here to find more justification. I'm not judging you, I actually see myself in you, I'm sorry

Your fiance is being sexually harassed, she's not cheating on you.

Lol!!...Flirting is not a serious activity .... I have flirted all my life to my

advantage.

Its a *fun* form of communication without serious intent.

The world would be a much duller place without it!


People need to lighten up, and trust those whom they put their trust in.

If they get let down then know it wasn't their fault but that the person

that let them down was at the least flawed.

I learnt a long time ago if someone cheats they will do it again. I don't give 2nd chances anymore.

a reply to: Mizzijr

That's stupid. Being cheated on isn't something anyone should have to deal with.

a reply to: Mizzijr

It is the definition of cheating. You don't have to have intercourse to be having an affair. This would have eventually led to a physical relationship if not discovered. It will probably happen again.

She doesn't 'love' you, she may 'like' you.

You sound as if you would fall on a sword for her, yet she can't say one simple word for you.
That simple word?

Stop.

This is why we should depopulate men.

Having 10 women per man would remedy this all too common situation by about 99%.

It'd be fair that women got to walk in our shoes for awhile. They have too many advantages currently.

This proposition might sound bad at first, until you actually think about it...

originally posted by: raymundoko
a reply to: Mizzijr

That's stupid. Being cheated on isn't something anyone should have to deal with.

People lack self respect and it'll only get worse till we have a complete revision of our culture and society.

They even go so far as to justify cheating as being "good for" the loser in that situation.

Islam, as psychotic as it is, becomes very attractive to millions of people because it is extremely harsh on this issue specifically.

Historically most cultures were harsh on it, but only a few "backward primitive" cultures retained these features.

The pendulum always swings to and fro on things like this, so patience is a virtue. The future will be very different, it always is.

Dude ... Reality Check Time.

Shiite like that happens in the workplace ALL THE TIME. If it happened to you, I'm sure you would have found a way to 'play it off'. She did too.

If you're both grown-up enough ... this won't be a problem.

Sounds like you're not grown-up enough. Let's hope this thread changes that.

In all sincerity ... Best of luck!!

a reply to: eletheia

we may have evolved alot but its still apart of who we are , of course we have the ability to recognise these simple bahaviours and correct them accordingly . Some cant recognise it , the ego is good at convincing us.

Im not questioning femininity here or in my previous posts so Im not sure why you stated they have fought long and hard to achieve things thats not what im talking about , Im talking about the effects of ego on the human mind.

yes strong independent women like my mother , my sister, my fiance'm ny fianc'es sister and mother , my aunts and cousins
yeh I was raised by strong independent women and they taught me to respect women.

I was just talking about how ego can effect anyone and catch them off gaurd .

a reply to: muzzleflash

So progressive societies should accept cheating as normal? You realize how you sound right?

a reply to: Snarl

If you think women send their bosses porn all the time then you've never had a job...

a reply to: muzzleflash

You obviously haven't thought about it or you are a very lonely single man and a bit peeved about it.

ive thought about this a lot since my last post.
i do hope that nothing comes of this and your relationship stays on solid ground.

i have been trying to think of a situation where i would be cool with my wife sending her boss a porno.
that just does not sit right with me at all.

either way you slice it you have the other issue to face which is her and her boss have an extremely inappropriate relationship. even if she has done no wrong and is not a player in the game....there is a problem there

a reply to: Assassin82

I don't know if it's cheating. Only you can decide that in your relationship, IMO.
It certainly is odd behavior on both parts, IMO, and to be having this type of 'relationship' at work is not only inappropriate but risky and dangerous.
I understand that she has self esteem issues and that likely could be part of the reason she is entertaining the attention.

I think that it is good that she hasn't lied but, sometimes withholding information is nearly the same and if you are the kind of person who wants to know everything and she is aware of that then withholding information until it is 'discovered' by you is damaging to the relationship foundation because it has been established as a part of the relationship.

If that's the case and in my opinion only.

originally posted by: raymundoko
a reply to: Snarl

If you think women send their bosses porn all the time then you've never had a job...

Thanks for your reply.

Well, you're right about that. I've never seen a woman send _anyone_ a porn link ... ever. So, I'll concede that point to you.

I'm not saying, "Everything's okay here. Nothing to see. Move along ... move along." Her boss sounds like a real scudger. The thing to do here is beat the ever-lovin' s#!t out of the boss' ass and let the chips fall where they may. This is that 'Blood of Patriots and Tyrants' thingy.

The question is: Is the fiancé worth it? If it was 'the wife' ... she damned sure better be.