Yeah, sure, I'd like a girlfriend. Just like i'd like a Lamborghini.

Originally posted by darkbake
reply to post by phroziac

 

I just got a brilliant idea! You can end up like me with all of my friends leaving me in the dust. Then you think to yourself... wow... I'm an older guy now and I kind of want to have a friend... then you go out there and find a girl that can be your friend!

Oh #!

Solved two birds with one stone!

Now you have a socially acceptable adult friend, and if that's your main goal, she'll probably want to date you, too -

edit on 24-11-2012 by darkbake because: (no reason given)

That'd be cool.

Originally posted by spacedoubt
A Lambo, and the "Idealized woman" are the perfect comparison.
It's best if one only has a poster of them. and neither lives up to the hype.

however, a real woman, with her own faults, who can also put up with your faults, is the best thing in the world.
Pay atention to the one who makes you feel comfortable when your are just being yourself.

I wouldn't want to be anywhere near the idealized women actually. Id just like one that likes to have fun and accepts me for me. It doesn't even matter what she looks like.

I thought the original post was funny. I put my odds at meeting Ms. Compatible higher than winning the powerball lottery. I've been single 8 years now, going on 9. And I don't mean "single" in the Austin Powers sense either.

Just a couple things I wanted to mention while I'm here:

1. I see a lot of statements (including & especially from women [or those claiming to be]) who are generalizing all women on a large scale. "Women want this, women want that..." What the heck, really? I'm pretty sure not all women are the same or want the same thing. Same goes for men. I see "programming" on TV that tries to tell people what they are and what they want. A shame it's actually working. Generalize enough and it becomes true. I was sad when I witnessed personalities of Disney characters (from their teen shows) being channeled by people I knew back in the late 90s. It effectively lowered the number of "real people" in my opinion, as I started to realize just how many "copies" there are out there.

2. Don't let your hormones make the choice. Relieve your body regularly to help prevent the "lower mind" from taking over and making rash decisions. Yes this is taboo but it can save you from being seduced. Ironically it also leads to a greater confidence which seems to be in style right now. When you display that you are unseducable, you may be noticed by A: Women wanting an extra challenge, or B: Women opposed to the art of seduction. It's up to you to figure out which is which.

What do I know though? I'm Mr. Picky and haven't so much as touched a girl beyond a handshake in over 8 years. I am happy however, and not loaded down with baggage. I guess getting married for a couple years "got it out of my system", at least enough to move beyond the constant pursuit of the perfect-yet-improbable woman. My main problem is finding someone worth the time. I spent so many years trying to make myself worthy of someone I met once (I don't even know her name or what happened to her), that I now find almost everyone else unworthy of me (at least as far as companionship goes). Funny how that works. If only she hadn't been there that one day I would've been more likely to "settle for someone".

reply to post by circlemaker


That's a really interesting story, so I'm wondering, do you have friends you spend time with? I'm getting older and wondering if single means being alone all the time or what.

I think you should actually try out my plan, phroziac, it sounds like it might really work. I will probably try myself lol

Relationships are like gardens...you a have pull a lot of weeds before you find the flower......and as far as getting a Lamborghini ....didn't you know...if it has tits or tires it will bring you down! ...so don't rely on the car.

I got married at 22, was married for 10 years and divorced in 02. The marriage served its purpose, gave me two children or one son and one she devil
Anyway, I have just a very few off/on relationships since divorce but each one of them reminded me why I was happy to be divorced.
They were either needy, pushy, bratty or worst of all, jealous of my kids, who both live with me.
Relationships are to complicated and require more work than I am willing to put in and I have no patience.
Besides, living alone with kids all these years, ive become a bit selfish and self centered not towards the kids, just anyone else.

One thing I have noticed on these boards is that men tend to admit their weaknesses and acknowledge their biological nature, whereas women tend not to.

Remember that power (social standing) and wealth are to women what youthfulness and attractiveness are to men. They are not the most significant attributes, but they are important in many cases when finding a partner. This does not mean women need to be young and attractive and that men need to be rich and influential to find a partner, but these attributes act as a cue to attracting a potential mate.

reply to post by phroziac


Eventually you'll find her! Just like eventually I will find him! Just take time out and figure out who you are and what your looking for.

Originally posted by FissionSurplus
Hmmm....after reading through this thread, the first thing I thought of is, all the men want the cute girls. There are so many women out there, who are loving, caring, and lonely, but they're not classically cute.

You want to know why that girl who's been bothering you is playing with your mind? Because you, and other guys like you, let her get away with it. Because, as you say, she was cute, and all you could do was stare at her body. Not like a boss, like a sucker.

Pretty girls learn early on that they can get away with whatever games they want to play, because men will allow it. They never had to develop their minds, or their personality, so they're just empty-headed bimbos who make men miserable. It is the rare woman who is beautiful inside as well as outside.

The same can be said for handsome, good looking guys. I've dated some gorgeous men, and I have to say, they were the worst boyfriends. Vain and stupid. You can only spend so much time between the sheets with these preening fools, and then it starts to wear mighty thin.

You are victim to our current social constructs, which states that success with females equals dating somebody pretty. No wonder so many men are angry and feel cheated in lfe! This isn't the movies, you know. Just because somebody like Seth Rogan gets the good-looking female lead, doesn't mean that it pans out in real life.

Pretty people tend to want to be with pretty people. It's a vanity thing, for sure. My youngest daughter is really very pretty. I worked very hard to get her to develop her mind and her personality, so she wouldn't be a vapid, annoying little heart-breaker. Although her personality and intellect are a bit more developed than your normal cutie-pie, she still broke a lot of hearts, and these were, I thought, really nice guys with good jobs and good hearts. She wanted her Valentino, which she now has, and I have to hear about her irritation with him all the time on the phone, because he is selfish. *Sigh*.

What is my long, belabored point? If I were you, I would re-write my profile on that dating site, saying that you are looking for that one special lady whom you can be best friends with, as well as lovers, and LOOKS ARE NOT IMPORTANT. In other words, cast a really wide net. You may catch some fish that you will throw back, but at least you're hauling 'em in, and not sitting there, lonely and angry, while some twit teases you and breaks dates on a whim.

As I've gotten half way through reading this thread I wanted to comment on your insightful post......I always find your posts to often be exactly what I would want to say....your better at it...and our daughters would probably be great friends....

So far this thread has made me really sad...there's so many "forces" against the true nature of Love...lol....been watching too many " Llittle House on the Prarie" episodes today.....and I miss a special guy I met over 10 yrs ago on the internet, LOL, the old AOL...we were an epic Love story in many ways......as much as the internet brought us together, it also tore us apart....has been 8 mns. since I have seen him....

I guess when it comes to Love and attraction...it's complex...and while the "mental" stimulation might attract a person in cyber space....chemistry in real life is something that can't be denied....anyways...from your pic you look young OP, under 30? I think once you stop thinking about women in the same way you do cars, you might find some really wonderful ladies, that like to snuggle too.....

reply to post by phroziac


I am baffled why some men have problems getting a woman.... In college I was broke, rode a brown rusted station wagon that used to break down on the way to class, had only four shirts three pants 2 pair of shoes.... and I NEVER had a problem getting a gf or woman to date. I knew no one on this campus mind you.

I think some men have it and some men don't. Even if you do not have it .. it is unavoidable to get a woman. All i have to say OP is that your hate for women is working against you. Hate for women usually makes you lose because you can ruin opportunites because you go off the handle when you THINK a woman is going to screw you over. I had a friend like you. He could not get a girl and if he got one he could not keep her to save his life... even when the woman wanted to be with him he was just an impossible woman hater that drives women away.

I think it is a you problem as women are always looking for a man.... I wouldn't worry much about it though eventually you will mature and get it.(hopefully) Men can get a woman at any age. My dating range was 19-45 when i was 30.

Relax man, do not blow a gasket and enjoy women.

Lamborghini??? eff that

but you compare a woman to car... a car is a thing... very telling and explains why you cannot get a woman. as i said a you problem

reply to post by votan

All i have to say OP is that your hate for women is working against you

OP has mommy issues, future (or current) Ted Bundy

reply to post by phroziac


I didn't. I've got a buddy that seems to have very similar issues. I don't know you but ill tell you what he does that gives him the same problems. Way too accepting of trashy women that look good. Bad families always seem to be an issue. He's always negative about women and I swear they smell it now. Actually I'm going to have to get to a keyboard to type this... Great guy, just doesn't mesh well at the moment.

I think its interesting that you associate a girlfriend with having a Lamborghini.

Ia Lamborghini a practical car? Can you afford it? Will it last you a long time? Is it really a good car for you in the long run? Lets face it owning a Lamborghini is a nice idea but its not really going to to work.

Maybe just like your choice of car you are going after the wrong kind of girls and this is why its not working?

Originally posted by Juggernog
reply to post by votan

 

All i have to say OP is that your hate for women is working against you

OP has mommy issues, future (or current) Ted Bundy

I do not have mommy issues and you are not funny.

Originally posted by PhoenixOD
I think its interesting that you associate a girlfriend with having a Lamborghini.

Ia Lamborghini a practical car? Can you afford it? Will it last you a long time? Is it really a good car for you in the long run? Lets face it owning a Lamborghini is a nice idea but its not really going to to work.

Maybe just like your choice of car you are going after the wrong kind of girls and this is why its not working?

I find it funny that you say this, because I don't find having a girlfriend to be practical! I probably am going after the wrong type of girls. I dunno. I dunno what the right kind of girls are.

reply to post by votan


I do not view women as objects. I only compared them to the car because im not likely to have either. I don't see whats so bad about me. Guess im just a horrible person who doesn't deserve to exist. :/

Originally posted by jziegler
reply to post by phroziac

 

Eventually you'll find her! Just like eventually I will find him! Just take time out and figure out who you are and what your looking for.

Im not him am I? I'll be in PA Monday (interstate 80)

Originally posted by RobertF
reply to post by phroziac

 

Hookers are cheaper, and they don't come with the baggage, just saying.

In a business and investment sense....you buy a Lamborghini, it depreciates as much as you use it. The same goes for hookers. The exotic car costs a lot more money than an exotic hooker.

With cars, you can purchase insurance if something goes wrong. But with hookers you can't as there is no insurance therefore you carry all the risk (and a lot more) if you get screwed over with diseases and such.

At the end of the day, nice guys finish last. The reason jerks start first is because too many women don't respect niceness because maybe they were screwed over by a nice guy before and now seek revenge.

Don't worry mate, I am sure you will find a good one. In fact, I am sure she will find you. And don't put your life searching into a online dating site. But if you are really desperate, I know there are a lot of Asian women and Hispanic women who would love to marry you and live in North America.

just go all ernest hemmingway

reply to post by Skywatcher2011



Ah, I put about as much usefulness into online dating sites as I do on ATS. Sure, theres some good stuff here, but its mostly a waste of time..ya know?

This was really just a rant though.

Hispanic women, huh? Is this going to end with an early divorce and "Yeah! suck it! Im a citizen now!!!!"?

reply to post by ollncasino

Whatever you do, don't get married then

Your post and your avatar made me laugh out loud - that face says it all.