I considered pming you, but, that might seem weird. So I'll make this as simple and as quick as I can. I think I may be anywhere from 2-4 years older
than you. I could be wrong, of course. But I'm not. I feel the same as you, and have as far as I can remember. Every single thing you said, pretty
much. Except that I did have sex, at an average age I suppose, though it was always out of love. The pure love I felt and feel for my human
companions has honestly been one of my only forms of refuge from this alien world. I've never considered college. I do feel with such a short time we
are given in this reality, that I have to spend every moment either helping others and making the world a better place, or bettering myself through
learning, meditating, leisure activity to calm my mind and I also learn a lot just by playing games or reading fiction or observing people.
Imitating people... Sometimes when I post I pretend to be someone else for fun. I'll pretend I have a mother and father still, or I have kids. I'll
pretend I'm somebody who's upset about something. Or I'll pretend I don't understand certain things for multiple reasons, sometimes to get a laugh
out of someone, sometimes to allow others to fulfill their need to feel needed or to teach, sometimes because I simply want to examine their
explanation in order to gain a further understanding of their views and background or simply for my entertainment. Like I said, I have been at this a
little longer than you. Not much, but you'll probably get bored line me and start playing harmless mind games with people to keep yourself occupied.
I mean after you get
out of school, assuming you aren't out yet and when you are you find a way, like me, to get by without a job. Or welfare. Or being homeless. Or going
to college. Or jail lol. If you can manage to do this then you will have lots of spare time. Which is the only way for me considering my love of
reading, learning, meeting others and taking in their stories and experiences, falling in love, and other leisure activities, and my erratic and
unfixable
sleeping schedule. Your family will be concerned that you're not "making something of yourself". The sooner you can let go of them, the better.
Unless you find that they are more loving and accepting than most other people on this planet. I could never be a part of the daily grind. If I had a
certain "job" that I dedicated my time
to regularly, it would have to be something that was really worthwhile. Like something that really made a positive difference in the world. I spend a
good amount of time, at my leisure, sharing food, medicine, clothing, blankets, etc, with the local homeless population. I suppose that's as good a
job as any. I enjoy hanging out with my homeless friends, listening to them, sympathizing and doing all in my power to help. I'm pretty poor
by most standards, but I still find that I have much more than they have. Plenty enough for me to share and to still get by. I'm not saying we are
the same. Even if we are both aliens in this world, that doesn't mean we have the same personality, or that we even come from the same planet, or are
the same "species" if you could call it
that. Maybe you come from a planet where there is no sex. I'm not saying you're wrong, but my humble and often incorrect opinion is that you simply
haven't found the "right" person. If you reside in a smaller town, it could be that you have not met one of your "kind" to even be emotionally or
spiritually compatible with. Or, maybe you just don't like sex and never will. I don't know. That's none of my business. Anyway, I think I'm
done now. I just wanted to let you know that your words hit a chord with me and that I'm over 18 and still here, haven't found a "way out of
here". I'm just still here, amassing as much knowledge and experiences and stories as I can. Hoping it will all come in handy someday. Some days it
does, some days it doesn't. Best of wishes!
If you, or any people reading this, ever wanna share thoughts, experiences, stories etc, pm me. With all my free time, I never ever have time to
return to any thread I've posted in. I've been thinking of putting a similar notice in my signature, so people know and don't waste their time
responding... Maybe I'll do that now! See ya in the funny pages!