Blood On My Shirt - Where Are the Real Men At?

I think anybody who felt angry when you described how he was hurting that child and the lady is a human being and deserves some respect, but that doesn't mean everybody would act like a hero in a situation like this. Some people lose all composure, some run, some are frozen. That doesn't mean they don't have empathy or feelings. Not everybody has the knowledge or the experience or the nature to confront something like this. Violence of this level is unnatural.

reply to post by jonnywhite


Thank u johnny,
do not think its about weather u jump on the individual or just do something, Its about whats right and wrong if you and i mean you feel someting going on is wrong, are you going to sit by and watch or do something, anything.
thats what makes the diffrence with some folks today, its not my problum i dont wont to get involved.
But is that what being a man is about u can be right or u can be wrong but dont just sit there.
Best

reply to post by submariner

it's a mistake to assume that anybody who has feelings should also have the ability to step up and stop the man. Not everybody is like that. Not everyone has the same mental and physical stamina. I think you need to be careful about drawing men with the same shape or marker. Men are different and react differently. But I think most of them would be very angry at this man.

I also had the instinct to make him explode when I read what you wrote about him hurting them.

reply to post by jonnywhite


You are right johnny,
I dont exspect evryone to react the same nor do i have any elutions that it is even possible that you or anyone can beat the tar out of someone, its not about that Really, Can you stand there and say Stop thats all no matter what for aslong as it takes just say"STOP". thats what i am talking about if someone does not have the "as you put it stamana" to do that, then how do they sleep at night.
Being a Man is not easy or confrtable but it does requier that you do the hard things when it comes to what is right and wrong.
if not what is the point in living, no pride, no uniqness, no striving, no advancement
I dont know what it is like to be a woman but i do know that to turn my back upon the helples, needy, or thouse that cant do for them self would be affrount to how i was raised and to what i have become.

Any man who is able to stand his ground and stand on his feet to assist others in trouble is a good egg in my book. I dont know you but I consider you my equal. Men with stones are a dying breed.

S&F for you my brother

reply to post by LifeIsEnergy


What kind of glass bottle were you using? This guy is either a wimp, or your glass bottle was a few inches thick.

Originally posted by Death_Kron
reply to post by LifeIsEnergy

 

1.) In Self defence, either for your own safety or that of others, your supposed to use a reasonable amount of force. I'm not in any way, shape or form condoning the man's actions (he had it coming to him really) but for your own protection I think it was unwise to bottle the guy, I don't know where about's in the world you reside but over here in the UK that would land you in serious trouble.

The OP did the right thing (and I salute him). The other guy took a swing. He had the bottle in hand -- was he supposed to let the guy try out a few punches on his face before going all in? No. This is not the kind of situation where you let some idiot feel you out physically/fight-wise before stopping things (you could have gotten hurt or the outcome could have been different otherwise). He shut this guy down in a practical fashion without using bullets (maybe then we could talk potential overkill), and it was the right call.

First of all, OP, what you did was literally exactly what I have done. Bottle in the face and all. Not because he deserved it (he did) but because you need to protect yourself in that situation. The same reason that passively standing between them would not work, if you get knocked down/out, what further help can you be? And if you are standing there and getting beat without fighting back, eventually you will go down. Screw a fair fight with a guy beating on a teenage girl. What would he know about it? And again what help can you be if he fairly punches you out?

As to the little intellectual exercise about how maybe stepping in might "ripple" into the girl being beat worse later, let's follow a different train of thought. Perhaps by doing what you did you saved her from not only the current situation where this particular beating could have escalated into her maybe being seriously injured. Also, as this "man" was later arrested, perhaps child protective services would get involved. Perhaps the child's mother will leave and take the girl with her. Maybe, instead of worsening, the girl's life situation could have improved. Of course, both situations, positive and negative, are hypothetical.

As to being a man. I don't feel one should label doing the right or tough thing as manly, but simply as right. A decent person would do it. Such as the two women who got involved. Anyone can do the right thing. Whoever called the cops did the right thing as well, they may have felt unable to help physically, but they did something. Instead of just watching and feeling justified in doing so because the next beating may be worse.

I've been in similar situations as that. I don't like to get involved with other peoples' affairs. However, some things are intolerable. Or, at least I cannot tolerate them.

Originally posted by josh2009s
reply to post by LifeIsEnergy

 

What kind of glass bottle were you using? This guy is either a wimp, or your glass bottle was a few inches thick.

edit on 17-8-2011 by josh2009s because: Upon further review, I now suspect the OP to be a liar.

You fail at physics. Go buy an Honest Tea or Snapple at the store, try this on yourself, and let us know if you aren't feeling wimpy...

I know my limitations, and I have none. I saw violence in my home growing up, and there's nothing that will set me off into a blind rage faster than seeing a man hit a child or a woman. I stood up for my mother, I've stood up for my friends, and without batting an eye, I'll stand for a complete stranger. The sad fact is though, if it is the male's mate, she'll more than likely turn on me for trying to help than get away, the stupid cow! But a child? A female child? Hell hath no fury like me. You did the right thing, even if those males who just watched didn't. I hope that your actions shamed them, and burned holes in their souls. I would have lashed out at them, calling them out for the cowards they are. Yes, I'm a b!tch. I'm a B!tch Goddess of unending fury as well as unending love. Get over it, fellas.

reply to post by jonnywhite


This is why you ought to prepare yourself for these situations before they happen. Cops and military personnel do, so that when they are in shock, they can let their training take over, to some degree. For those who never sit there and thnk about what the situation would require, never think about all the people who suffer in this world, and wait until they are confronted with the situation, hoping for a positive reaction? Their not doing something is not something I have as much pity on. You know the type of world you live in, get ready to greet evil on your doorstep.

I also forgot to say well done, my apologies. And also, not that it means anything, but you have my respect.

reply to post by LifeIsEnergy


Where are the real men? I'm looking at one right now (*figuratively of course.)

I know you feel conflicted, but you shouldn't. You stepped up and did what needed to be done, and you could very easily have saved one or more lives. My hat's off and a glass of Single Malt is up in your honor brother.

Semper Fi

Originally posted by submariner
reply to post by CynicalDrivel

 

you are not a man, fine
and yes u may have had some situations in life, for that i do feel pity .
and as with my first statement u are not a man so...............
why do u feel the need to post to this ?
sorry life sucks but we are not here to make u feel better did u read the OP and if u did why are u posting back with ur tha world isant right crap, just read and learn.

*sigh*

You're still not getting it:

The person I was commenting to:

At what point do I or you stop? who am I to exercise violence when it is the very thing that destroys us all?

Me:

Well, let's back off of beating for a moment, and deal with something even more people care less about: lying. When is it justice to lie?

Was trying to explain to someone who did not support stepping in to protect the innocent with the use of violence why there are times that you do, even when violence is not something you condone, starting with something not as volitile as the subject matter here. So, while the converstation was still revolving around the situation, it was about filling someone in who has the type of mentality that you attacked me for. You're attacking someone who has a similar mindset as you without fully understanding that they might just agree completely.

So: my need to post was to give someone with a different viewpoint my level of understanding from my viewpoint, which supports what the op did, if they could follow what the heck I was talking about. I did this instead of what you did to me with the hopes that they can learn something from me instead of see me as their personal demon with a hot poker aimed at their backside for naughtiness.

The reason I got any level of aggravated with you is because you're fussing at me for agreeing with the OP's action, and validating what he did through from an educated, experiential, and natural ability to understand the situation. (This is in no way implying that I got it 100% correct or am some sort of freaking genius, although I score pretty high on those stupid tests.)


....

Now, how in the heck do you get that I had a hard life? Yes, I spent half my childhood in an inner city, and the other half out on a semi-farm. I've experienced real life from a young age. Some things were hard, some things were easy, but as far as I can see, I've been blessed immensely. I wasn't pointing out the situation for pity, but in the hope that you understand that not everything with me is even remotely hypothetical, although a lot of what I'll have to deal with online will stay in that realm. Sorry, come from a long line of people who believe that you shouldn't brag about your good deeds, so I picked one of the ones that I'm far removed from (20 years!) and something most people would have seen as an automatic thing. (As in: how can this be anything special? A monster would protect his baby brother!)

This was not about making me feel better. I talk a lot, and I write a lot, but it's rarely if ever all about ME. The only person who ought to be made to feel better is the poor guy who started this thread. It's not easy to do what is right when it makes you cry to do it.

And as for "just read and learn": why the hell else would I be in this thread if I wasn't going to read it and cram information in my head? You haven't said a dang thing that lines up with what I'm doing here.

......

Do you get it, or am I going to have to give up on you?

reply to post by petrus4


lahoreledger.com...

www.zimbio.com... know nothing about those sources credentials but i guess it is from his auto biography that he routinely beat the crap out of his wife so i guess he was not that peacefull all the time

Originally posted by AkumaStreak

Originally posted by josh2009s
reply to post by LifeIsEnergy

 

What kind of glass bottle were you using? This guy is either a wimp, or your glass bottle was a few inches thick.

edit on 17-8-2011 by josh2009s because: Upon further review, I now suspect the OP to be a liar.

You fail at physics. Go buy an Honest Tea or Snapple at the store, try this on yourself, and let us know if you aren't feeling wimpy...

I "fail at physics." Besides the obvious fact that you are cool, have you ever seen a glass bottle being busted over someones head? My guess is probably not, after all, the last time you probably looked away from your computer is when you answered the door for your extra large pizza. Like I said, though, only a guess.

Originally posted by Aeons
You know who gives up their seat on the bus? It isn't the preppy boy, and it isn't the guy in the suit. It is the construction worker whose been on his feet all day, or the boy in leather jacket with the mohawk.

Real men are often at home with their wives, not hanging out in a place where they might see this sort of thing happening. When they are, some of them do step in.

My brother stepped in once to stop a guy beating on his girlfirend in front of his apartment, while holding a screw driver. The woman attacked my brother, and the guy stabbed him with the screwdriver. Then my brother was charged for being there. Family friend lawyer got him off by talking to the prosecutor about how stupid charging him was.

I've helped stop a big juice monkey beating on his girlfriend, and she did the same thing. She physically defended her boyfriend because people were pulling him off of punching her. He was easily 240 and over six feet, and clearly on steroids. She was about 5'5 and about 120 pounds.

A couple of those instances will blow a person's mind.

edit on 2011/8/17 by Aeons because: (no reason given)

You pretty much summed up the reasons why I don't step in. You try to help people and those same people you tried to protect turn around and attacks you for it. The bottom line people in general dont like people messing in their buisness regardless of whether they are victims or not.

No matter how you put it, love is one crazy powerful thing. They accept the person regardless what they do, its messed up I know, but what else can I say to try and make sense of that kind of situation.


in the end its just mind bogling as you mentioned

reply to post by LifeIsEnergy


Your probably lucky you weren't charged with assault with a weapon.
No such thing as a hero, just people who are kind enough to get involved.
On the flipside:
I was once having a heated argument with an ex, just words, and some woman just randomly stepped in, didn't matter that she didn't know what the argument was about, she just took sides.
My ex had a drug problem and had stolen for it, this offended me.
we broke up that afternoon.
really wanted to destroy the half-witt, wannabe do-gooder that tried to step in but I didn't.

reply to post by LifeIsEnergy


I will tell you why those men did not step in. I lived in rough neighborhood, I am not thug by a long shot, i stand out like a sore thumb.

while i lived there was a news story where a man was beating up his girlfriend. A good samaritan decided to step in to protect the woman. The woman turned on him when he attacked the other man and they both cleaned his clock.

There was another instance like that as well where the man pulled out a knife and killed him.

There were more than one instance where the good samaritan ended up in a body bag or in the hospital. There were also stories where the samaritan was able to stop an attack only have charges pressed against him/her, or retaliation against the samaritan.


It is just not worth it. Even if you feel like a protector cuz you can many times it is not your place to do it. I have been in a situation where i did the right thing by stepping in but the consequences for it sucked. it's like why?? why would i get crapped on?

If you want to do it, hey that is fine. You sound like a person who thinks/is tough by the way you express yourself, and also your disgust for the other men.

If I am in a situation like yours before I intervene I have to think the following.. if i step in and I get killed, injured or crippled. how will that affect my family?? Lets say i decide to step in anyways, I get crippled and lose my job or I die.. was it really worth it??

It is a jungle out there and in the jungle life is cruel and you cannot protect everyone especially when the people you help can turn on you. Protect your own and protect others without endangering your own. sure some people may thank you especially if you know them.. If it were my friends in trouble like this sure.. if it was a complete stranger .. yeah i would much rather call the boys in blue than get involved.

Am I coward? Nope I have the scarrs to prove it, but you can't just bust in there like some kind of bone headed super hero. One nice scam that is used on bone heads like you is the whole damsel in distress bit where a girl calls for help and you run in there like an idiot only to be robbed or killed.


I get you and i understand you but don't expect everyone to be bone headed like you. if you know the individual you are protecting sure go right ahead but a perfect stranger where you are not aware of the situation.. use caution.

don't crap on those men they probably all have families or loved ones that depend on their protection. they can't go around endangering themselves like that.

If protecting others is your calling join the service or become a cop.

reply to post by petrus4


seriously it might be worth learning martial arts, they are not about beating people up, they are largely about defence and your taught to only use it in defence.

i learnt some basics along time ago that have helped to prevent situations where harming somebody or being harmed may occur. simply letting them take swings and blocking them. you don't get hurt, neither do they.