Differences in Etiquette of Men and Women

It all comes down to cultural conditioning.

Why are breasts considered more appealing to look at than vagina or penis?

Why is a female body considered art and a male body considered nothing (not including models of course)?

You will find different views for nudity around the world, and different conditioning from culture to culture.

Originally posted by JakiusFogg
reply to post by Aeons

 

BLOODY HARRIDAN!!

I'm working on my best fishmonger's wife routine, but I'll settle for Bloody Harridan until I get there.

reply to post by Aeons


hahah Don't worry folks I am firmly ensconced in the sanctity of matrimony. But good tips for others lurking!

NOW

devils advocate! MWAH HA HA HAAAAA

You just said the words. wiggle room. Does that not fly in the face of what you were just saying about a man lack of right to persist?

reply to post by JakiusFogg


Persistence and aggressivity aren't the same. Some guys believe that there wiggle room exists until the woman pull a can of mace. If you're the next guy that encounters that woman, she might not be in the mood to be anything but 100% clear with you.

reply to post by Aeons


So what you are in fact saying. (everyone should listen close as these are pearls here) is that men should in fact MAN UP! (by man, I mean like my avatar. A Gentleman!)

New Man
Mellenium Man
Metro Man
Whwtever

all gone by the wayside? (not that I was ever any of those types) and that in fact there is room to play, just play by the rules.

We're getting some good female decoding here, no goof to me now, but OP you should be listening to this!!

reply to post by JakiusFogg


Aggressive is a legal issue.
Persistance in the case of women is like chasing a bus that doesn't see you.
Sorry but it had to be said.

reply to post by DrumsRfun


I know what you saying mate, however I am doing this for the sake of others here, I feel we are really getting to the heart of the matter from a female perspective. That, in m y experience in the battle of the sexes, is a rare thing.

It's like a mason talking out of turn. You better listen when they do!

Originally posted by JakiusFogg
reply to post by DrumsRfun

 

I know what you saying mate, however I am doing this for the sake of others here, I feel we are really getting to the heart of the matter from a female perspective. That, in m y experience in the battle of the sexes, is a rare thing.

It's like a mason talking out of turn. You better listen when they do!

You're doing fine. Some of the guys could take a lesson from you on being a smooth operator. If some guys are reading through this, take some notes.

reply to post by metamagic


I was just throwing out the most outlandish scenario I could come up with. I think the main basis for my argument is that I feel women as Jakius said that there is imbalance. It would seem that men are a lot more open to being approached, flirted with, excited by, or even touched by someone of the opposite sex then women are now. Women by proxy seem to be more stand-offish lately. I frankly am more intimidated to approach a woman now then I was 15 yrs ago. When I was younger I had no problems approaching women, but as I got older and the times changed things seem more difficult to do.

Example of this.

There was a girl that I had been flirting with and felt was flirting with me. Well I rolled with it and we were fine as far as I could tell. We talked a lot, she called me on my phone, she texted me daily. Emailed me from time to time etc. Now before I conclude this example you should know that we worked together but we were not co-workers. She just worked at the same facility it wasn't the same as a working relationship if that makes sense. Then one day I actually hit on her and next thing I know she filed a complaint on me with my boss for hitting on her. She didn't say I had sexually harassed her but that was the impression my boss got and I was basically told to stay away from her.

There was another incident where there was a co-worker that got fired recently after claims of sexual harassment by a female. First off the employee in question never even spoke to said female that anyone at work knows about. I will give you that there may be details we don't know about, but the way he treated her it would seem she was not liked by him at all. Anyway the employee ended up getting fired and now everyone at work is scared to go around said female because they feel if she gets mad at them she will just report them for sexual harassment.

It would just seem that these days things are all twisted, and I don't understand what the difference is. Call me naive, but just because I flirt with a girl or say hey I'd like to hook up with you. Doesn't mean that I am going to get pissed off if I am rejected or assume that because she flirted with me I can have sex with her.

From the responses of Aeons it would seem that somewhere down the road women have been conditioned to think that all men are going to rape or harm them. I mean just because a guy flirts with you and you aren't attracted to him doesn't mean he is going to chase you down with a knife or stalk you. I have dated psycho women as well. The nut jobs are the minority not the majority, and it would seem there is a definite trend of grouping all men into a category because of the actions of one.

reply to post by Aeons


I thank you!

Your avatar is still smoking hot though!!

Rock on brother!

Originally posted by JakiusFogg
reply to post by DrumsRfun

 

It's like a mason talking out of turn. You better listen when they do!

I have never been a bricklayer so I wouldn't know.

reply to post by Phantom28804


I think that the difference between your flirting and your come on might be way too different man.

You activated the "holy crap, run" reaction. That isn't the only reaction women have. If those women that reacted that way have....gone on other dates....then you may want to consider that your approach is WAY off.

Originally posted by DrumsRfun
reply to post by JakiusFogg

 

Aggressive is a legal issue.
Persistance in the case of women is like chasing a bus that doesn't see you.
Sorry but it had to be said.

Persistence can have a place. The guys that are activating women's safety response aren't being persistent really. They're being dense.

Originally posted by Aeons
reply to post by Phantom28804

 

I think that the difference between your flirting and your come on might be way too different man.

You activated the "holy crap, run" reaction. That isn't the only reaction women have. If those women that reacted that way have....gone on other dates....then you may want to consider that your approach is WAY off.

edit on 2011/3/28 by Aeons because: (no reason given)

You say that by presuming that you know what I mean by hitting on her as saying hey baby wanna go to bed. How would you react if I said that all I did was ask her to a movie and dinner?

reply to post by Phantom28804


The only time you dip your pen in company ink, is at the Christmas party!!

I know what you are saying though. I will recount one episode

I was 16, and in an apprenticeship scheme. it was a group of 15 trainees. We went through all the usual legislation and regulation, including a brief on sexual harassment in the workplace. OK Fine

Some months later, talking with one of my fellow female trainees, we were talking about the others. I made a throw away comment that one of the girls always appeared to wear wonder bras!!!

before I knew it, I was hauled before my line manager, and given a proper dressing down!! I wasn't fired, but I was warned.

Personally I could not believe it. There was not malice in it. Hell it did not even remember saying it. But I know where you are coming from, that this type of scenario can make you hyper sensitive to you situation. And it is not far, It really isn't.

And this could be the case here, She could be over reacting she could have had a bad experience. What did you say to her?

So Advice I would give to you. Don't approach the chick in work, don't hit on her per se. (might be too late now) but just go back to her, apologize, explain that you liked here and though you might want to get to know each other on a persona;l level. And take it easy from there.

Unless you went in all G-Money in the first place, in which case, move on dude!

Originally posted by Phantom28804

Originally posted by Aeons
reply to post by Phantom28804

 

I think that the difference between your flirting and your come on might be way too different man.

You activated the "holy crap, run" reaction. That isn't the only reaction women have. If those women that reacted that way have....gone on other dates....then you may want to consider that your approach is WAY off.

edit on 2011/3/28 by Aeons because: (no reason given)

You say that by presuming that you know what I mean by hitting on her. How would you react if I said that all I did was ask her to a movie and dinner?

Has she been on dates before?

People have successfully negotiated this with her. You didn't. She reacted very strongly to you.

Is that really an indication that she's being mean? Not necessarily. It is likely you blindsided her, and the environment you're in with her worried her about it.

She may have over reacted. Most people don't over-react without a reason. You can use your intellect to deduce the reason. What made you think that someone who reacted THAT strongly to a dinner date was interested in you that way? If you've encountered these reactions before, why are you consistently pursuing women who are high strung on this issue?

Dig deeper.

reply to post by Aeons


I can definately agree with that.
Woooooo we finally agree on something.

reply to post by Aeons


It's odd. He asks her to go for dinner and a movie, and she responds with a harassment complaint.

Something does not smell right! on both counts.

reply to post by Aeons


Well in this particular case it turned out that she was in to women not men. However, would it not have been more appropriate to say hey I'm not interested then to just go straight to someone's boss.

Also let me clarify we were not co-workers. She worked at the same place that I worked.

That being said no I do not elicit this response from women on a normal basis, but thanks for implying that....... I was simply saying that I find it very difficult to approach women for fear of reproach for nothing but a harmless question. I mean if I was walking around saying lets get it on that would be one thing, but there is nothing overly harmful about asking someone on a date last I checked. Heck I have asked married women on dates before without realizing they were married and there reaction was basically something to the effect of "Ahh how sweet if I wasn't married I would love to."

reply to post by Phantom28804


OK I will tell you something that my dad told me from his youth in the 50's

He always told me he had a friend, who went around the pub asking women

"Do you f**k"?

9/10 he would get a slap, but you only have to ask 10 women to leave with a girl on your arm

I am not saying this is what you should try, but it is an example of not being down hearted by refusals.

If you feel you have something good to offer. study it, know what it is. Learn where that would be appreciated.

I always sucked picking up in bars, never could do it. but get me on a one to one. in a quite place. done deal. You have intelligence about you, that is for sure. Rational thinking too.

But know that some women are just as fickle as men, and are looking for the farrari driver, or in this case another woman! but don't let that dishearten you. As i say if you know what you have t offer, even if like me, you not the best looking guy in the world, then maybe your not the worst either.

Average is OK. But being average in spite of it is not.