You have every right in the world to whoop ya kid's..PLZ start I am sick of all the punk's

reply to post by TurkeyBurgers


Dude, there was no bait there. I wasn't attempting to insult you, simply proving a point. As the above poster mentioned about his 3 yr old and the stove, yes, there are instances in which it is justifiable to give a slap on the hand or behind in order to prevent a more serious injury or occurrence.

I'm sorry if you felt that my previous post was to engage you in a name-calling insult-fest, however it was not, and that is not the point of these boards. I just don't understand how you can go around insulting people, calling them "mentally challenged" and believe there are no ramifications for that.

Some people actually ARE mentally challenged and through no fault of their own. You could have phrased that better or simply creatively criticized me or even asked, "do you really think a 2 yr old deserves that?". Many better ways to get answers dude...

reply to post by midniteracerx


As I have stated in this thread already, it seems people are equating those who hit with belts, hitting multiple times, etc etc etc together with those who do a singular open palm schmeck to the bum, and calling it all "whoopin"

I think it's a big mistake.


YES, I agree, if you are aggressive towards a child, they will, in turn, be aggressive many times.

Sacking your child's hand, once, when they are continually reaching out to place their hand on a burning stove is NOT whooping. They do not equate together.

Originally posted by TheAmused

But there is my point..Time out go play ya xbox all day ....
Yeah it work's in what world?

They're doing it wrong.
Time out does not equal reward.
The error was in the application.
The fact that she slammed the door indicates a disposition towards violence and was generally rude, so I reiterate: I consider that there is a deeper underlying cause for the 'decay' we are seeing.

for humor..
Here is a classic case of spoiled brat


How many time out's or tickle's does this little kid deserve?


all spoiled punk's.
That will grow up with no respect for anyone .

5 tickle's all around...How dare they.

Originally posted by aorAki

Originally posted by TheAmused

But there is my point..Time out go play ya xbox all day ....
Yeah it work's in what world?

They're doing it wrong.
Time out does not equal reward.
The error was in the application.
The fact that she slammed the door indicates a disposition towards violence and was generally rude, so I reiterate: I consider that there is a deeper underlying cause for the 'decay' we are seeing.

He just need's a good ole fashioned BUTT WHOOPING!!!
it ok to say it man

reply to post by Kailassa


Wow that tantrum example was awesome. I do not think that I will ever forget that. How amazing of an idea!

Originally posted by TheAmused


He just need's a good ole fashioned BUTT WHOOPING!!!
it ok to say it man

Just because I'm not into physical discipline doesn't mean I don't have a sense of humour.
I just don't find this a humourous topic.

reply to post by Rockstar1102


The reason that I asked if you had any mental disorders was because you are justifying hitting a two year old child as a means of punishment. Why would you punish someone who is too young to understand the ramifications of it's actions? Using pain as a teaching method for a two year old?? That is a VERY sick behavior. Are you sick?

That is saying that the only thing a child that young understands is PAIN. So I will use the only thing this kids understands, PAIN, as a means of instruction.

My advise is to seek professional treatment if your justification for inflicting pain on a two year old is the two year olds lack of understanding.

You need help.

m'Bride and I chose to not have children, thus I can't directly know the pressures of raising them.

I feared my father. He whipped me with a leather belt when I misbehaved. It worked, to an extent, in that I was motivated to not get caught doing something that I knew would displease him. He would get very angry, tear off his watch, throw down his glasses and commence to whipping.

I started working for my parents at age 5 for $.05/hour for tasks beyond my regular chores. I wanted money, that was the way to get it. I didn't want to be around my father, so I found a better job at much better pay (I got a nickle an hour raise each year) at age 10, so I gave him notice and went to work elsewhere. he was both proud and ticked off. I still had to help him with fence construction, outbuilding construction, cattle care -- whatever needing done around the ranch and that was appropriate.

My Dad graduated to facial shots when I was about 10, and at age 12 I took secret martial arts classes, pretending to go bowling at the alley twice a week after homework. I never used it against him. At 13, he went after me and I broke his jaw with a framing hammer, and ran away from home. My Mother stood up to him many times, risking abuse herself, and was fearsome when protecting her child, although meek the rest of the time.

I left home at age 16. Since then, my father and I have become good friends again. After he retired, he went into social services and works with families in abusive situations. Both of my parents carry a lot of guilt about my childhood. I see it as an interactive learning experience, and really, compared to others I knew, I think it was a good childhood.

Did I fear that I'd also be a hitter? No. I'm not a screamer either, and I don't tolerate it from others. What I became was autonomous, and it was integral to my survival.

Where I grew up -- Idaho -- corporal punishment was an acceptable thing in schools until Jr. High School. It worked also. This is all still a very smushy gray line for me. I think spankings inflicted without anger can be an effective tools. Positive reinforcement, of course, is preferrable, however I know very good parents who occasionally spank their kids. I've seen the kids, and how they behaved, and I understand. Beyond spanking..... I think that's abuse. I just hope that those who employ spankings really understand where the boundaries are.

I wouldn't want to be a parent in these charged times. Much respect to anyone who shoulders that immense responsibility.

Sorry for the novella. I have issues y'know

Thank you OP! It's about time someone said something.

If you treat your kid as "equal" you should expect him to treat you as equal. So when you tell him to go to bed, he can tell you to go to hell - he doesn't have to listen to you cause he's your equal and you can't tell him what to do.

You're a parent. Act like it!

I was spanked as a kid and believe me - it worked. I had to stand in a corner plenty of times ... but, we never called it time-out. The corner was usually reserved for misbehaving. The belt (sometimes a switch and even a razor strap) were reserved for deliberately defying my parents. And when I got spanked, I didn't do it again because I knew next time it would be worse. Often times I got a spanking then got stood in the corner.

My parents (really my dad - my mother rarely disciplined my brother and I) never "abused" either my brother or myself. If marks were left, they were simply red whelps that subsided within minutes.

I've watched too many kids whose parents can't control them get sat in "time-out". It's just not for me - or my kids. Most parents that I've seen that use the time-out method let their children walk all over them. It's ridiculous. Sometimes I wish I could spank those parents when their kids are running around screaming in the house and they just sit there like that's perfectly normal behavior for an 8 year old.

Spanking is NOT abuse. It's punishment.

Originally posted by Amaterasu
2 year olds CAN understand a gentle, guiding voice, a redirection from the behavior, and a kiss on the forehead. They CAN be shown a better choice of behaviors.

Hell yes. Even my semi wild cat has learned to stop scratching and biting just though me cuddling him, reasoning with him and gently putting him outside if he's too bad. He's even learned to wink to say he's sorry if he misbehaves, and looks so miserable until I cuddle him and tell him I know he's trying to be good.

The problem is, one needs some maturity to communicate easily with children (or animals) when they get difficult, and to gain their respect. And respect has nothing to do with whether they get smacked occasionally or never, it's about how you act, who you are. Children can perceive hypocrisy, bullying, spinelessness faster than adults can, and will respond accordingly.

The ideal parent has enough maturity to not need to smack kids to teach them and get their understanding and co-operation, but most people these days don't even start to grow up until after they've had their children. With small families few new parents have had the practice people used to have with siblings, nephews and nieces. So inevitably kids are being raised by parents on "L Plates". (Is an L Plate for a learner driver a worldwide thing?)

What parents and children really need, is grandparents.

To be a good parent you must first be someone you can respect. Spend time getting to know your children, doing things with them. Expect their best behaviour all the time, and don't take any cheek from them. And love them, don't hold grudges, and love them even more.

Whether or not a well loved and understood kid has an occasional pat on the bum is immaterial. But generally, the less smacks you've needed to use to bring up a happy, hard-working, respectful and caring adult, the better your parenting has been.

Originally posted by Daniem
So if its ok to beat your family for doing something you deem wrong, its also ok for the son or daughter to bring a can of whooping to her parents if THEY do something "wrong"?

The thing is you can outsmart a kid. Teach him to behave by using your smarts instead of your fists. But alas, we live in a world of idiots nowadays, how will they know how to raise a child?

NEVER use violence, unless your very life depends on it. To touch and harm another that is weaker and smaller than you, in a way they dislike, is COWARDLY. And your dumb if you dont know how to get help in other ways then your fist.

I was waitng for someone to say something intelligent.
Bad Parents=Bad Kids

[edit on 27-7-2009 by Dillmiester]

My stepdad beat myself and my brother with a belt. Bottom of our feet, he hit us, etc. It did not show us respect, it made us fear when he was around.

My mother on the other hand, her punishment was Mean Max. A wooden spoon with a mean face drawn on it. She'd have us get it for her. We'd turn our hands over. We'd get a whack on each. It did not really hurt much at all. One whack per hand. The fear of getting the spoon and waiting for the smack was all the "whooping" we needed.

If you are a skilled parent, you never need to touch your child, ever. Loss of freedoms really can put a kid in line quickly. Parents inabiilty to follow through the whole punishment, or worse, threaten constantly but never actually punish, that's the reason kids get the way they do.

I got spanked and grounded... but it taught me discipline. People must think kids will listen to you and use their brains a little bit if you yell at them for doing something stupid. Many kids (not all) don't seem to be able to listen to reason, they are sort of like dogs in the sense that they need to learn to associate bad actions with bad consequences (spanking, grounding, etc.). The problem is now that you can go to jail for even laying a finger on your child and someone can report abuse or neglect which (at least) doesn't happen too often..

[edit on 7/27/09 by MoothyKnight]

reply to post by unityemissions


You know I was raised the same way. My mom, not my dad cuz he was hardly around as a kid, But my mom would allow me to make mistakes, allow me to make my own decisions, and respected that, but when i disrespected her, you bet your A$$ i would get my A$$ beat! And I would like to thank my mother for that, Its made me who I am today, A vewr y loving and respecting guy. I think its ok to bring the belt out, when its nesecary, not just for any old mishaps or mistakes.

reply to post by TurkeyBurgers


I think your misconstruing a quick slap on the hand with a full-on beating. I'm not advocating beating the piss out of a 2 yr old, far from it. But I believe there are certain instances where it is justified to prevent FUTURE damage.

Let me quote your boy Santayana: "Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it". So, if a child is not taught or disciplined at a young age will he not repeat his actions? Hmmmm...

You're insults are getting petty by the way and I think it's reached the point where you need to relax. This is not a bashing message board and that is not what ATS is all about. These are peoples opinions regardless of what you personally believe.

Originally posted by unityemissions
If I so choose to have kids one day, I will respect them. In doing so, they will hopefully respect me. I remember being a kid and getting whipped with the belt. It just encouraged me to not only continue, but to increase my mishaps.

Physical abuse, emotional abuse...it's still abuse. Treat you kid as an equal, and they will love you and respect you dearly. At least, this is my thought. I remember seeing my friends whose parents allowed them to make mistakes, but gently guided them when there voice was wanted. These were the most successful, and happy friends I had.

I appreciate your view, but think it's a bit flawed and out-dated. I think "punks" are more a result of collective pressures. It's a societal problem, not a familial one. Feed their mind with what interests them, and they will grow wise and successful.

To love is to accept entirely, both the correct and incorrect choices. I choose to love.

New age, ya think? Whatever. The labels are meaningless, IMHO.

I agree totally. Of the friends I grew up with, it was the ones that had the most freedom and least discipline which ended up being the greater successes. The ones who always got disciplined are either huge social cowards or bullies themselves.

reply to post by Rockstar1102


My opinion is that hitting a two year old is depraved. My opinion is that it is the act of someone with a mental disorder. I am sorry if you fit this description. There is NO reason you could ever give for slapping a two year old. Because your dumb self left the stove on and left your child unsupervised next to the stove you are going to hit the two year old that is curious about its surroundings?

SEEK HELP! Professionally!

reply to post by Amaterasu


The only problem is, your not the only one feeding them information. Theres a world out there that you cant control. So no matter what information you feed there minds, there will always be others that feed them aswell. Now of course beating them wont solve that problem, thats not why I replied, but there are many flaws in what is being said.
To break it down to anyone, there really isnt a right or correct way of raising a child. Theres too many variables and factors to take into affect. Theres not only parenting, but also enviormental issues that play a role in a childs life. Friendship, the views of society, media information and school. All of these factors can determine a childs outcome until they reach the age of being able to decide on there own, and not have factors that affect there decisions.
And no i dont have kids, and no im not trying to tell anyone how to raise them.

Peace!

reply to post by TurkeyBurgers


And how exactly would you handle the situation? Let the kid touch the stove and see what happens? That makes you negligent, which is a vibe you've been giving off for quite sometime now...

How do you propose the situation is handled big guy? Sit them down and say "no, that's hot, don't touch that?"...Yup, telling a two year old "no" is really going to work. Or maybe you'll tickle them to death, maybe, just maybe, you can prove it's hot to them by putting YOUR hand on a burning hot stove.

Yes, I, as well as others on this topic, believe it's okay to discipline a two year old. I don't necessarily believe it should be done strictly out of punishment, but maybe out of their own safety and well-being.

It's pretty clear you were left to fend for yourself as a child, eating those paint chips and sticking your tongue in the socket and all...