Girl, 14, arrested for posting nude MySpace pics

Originally posted by nixie_nox
reply to post by calihan_12

 

That I agree with. Hard to pay attention to the Ben Stein look alike droning on about the reproductive system.

And as a teen your thinking what does that old fart know?
(though the older you get the more you realize the old folks have the craziest sex life of all)

What I am trying to say is that the sex education needs to go further and deeper then putting a condom on a banana.

What teens need to be taught is to recongize destructive behavior. To recongize they are seeking sex for the wrong reasons. And if they insist on doing it, how to do it correctly.

If a female is sexually abused, people think the obvious and they turn into a recluse. But often the result is just the opposite. they often sleep with anyone and anything. Because their self esteem is destroyed. And they try to get attention to rebuild it. To only feel used and feel more destroyed, until they are severlly hurting themselves.

Hah, isnt that the truth. The people who seem the most meek and geeky end up being dominatrix's in bed. Not that I would know personally.. but I sure hear about it a lot.

I do agree it needs to be more in depth. They just need to figure out a way of making it interesting and exciting so that the kids actually listen and learn and can apply it to their life.

Originally posted by calihan_12

Originally posted by nixie_nox
reply to post by calihan_12

 

That I agree with. Hard to pay attention to the Ben Stein look alike droning on about the reproductive system.

And as a teen your thinking what does that old fart know?
(though the older you get the more you realize the old folks have the craziest sex life of all)

What I am trying to say is that the sex education needs to go further and deeper then putting a condom on a banana.

What teens need to be taught is to recongize destructive behavior. To recongize they are seeking sex for the wrong reasons. And if they insist on doing it, how to do it correctly.

If a female is sexually abused, people think the obvious and they turn into a recluse. But often the result is just the opposite. they often sleep with anyone and anything. Because their self esteem is destroyed. And they try to get attention to rebuild it. To only feel used and feel more destroyed, until they are severlly hurting themselves.

Hah, isnt that the truth. The people who seem the most meek, old and geeky end up being dominatrix's in bed. Not that I would know personally.. but I sure hear about it a lot.

I do agree it needs to be more in depth. They just need to figure out a way of making it interesting and exciting so that the kids actually listen and learn and can apply it to their life.

ALSO, let us keep something in mind.

Recently, I saw in the news there has been an enormous increase in STD's in nursing homes.

Old people know about sex... they know about protection... and yet you see all these viagra etc commercials on tv and you dont think that has something to do with the problem?

I mean cmon, who are we trying to fool?

Its not just children.

Originally posted by dariousg
This is indeed sad. Sad on many fronts. First, the girl feels the need to do this. I agree that she is of the age where hormones and curiosity are at their peak. She has to know it is wrong. Even if she has some ego about how great her body is or whatever led her to doing this.

Second, the parents have failed in communicating the dangers of today's world to her. About predators that will take advantage of her. I lay part of the blame on them.

Third, the police overreacted. Contact her parents and the girl. Let them know what was happening. Let her know that if she did it again THEN she would be arrested. But to arrest her up front? Hmmmm, I think they missed out on THE opportunity to set things straight.

It's all just sad.

I agree, but disagree. i don't agree that the parents are at fault. But I do agree with the rest of your post. All too often we blame the parents, before the opportunity for the parents has been presented to the parents to correct the behavior.

Ie: when one of my kids was 10, she befriended a person who worked at the Toronto zoo. (we live on the other side of the country) She met this person on the now rife with pedos, "Habo hotel" A seemingly harmless online meeting place for kids. As we do monitor our kids computer time, we quickly found out about zoo boy and explained to her what he was really about. She quickly discontinued talking to him, and although we reported him as we should the authorities did nothing. Fortunately we live on the other side of the country or they may had been arresting me, but I digress.

We didn't fail in explaining the dangers, she was just never exposed personally to the dangers, and thus disregarded our cautions until they became a potential reality. The rest of your post I agree with. This should have been a non issue, embarassing for the girl, but hardly a criminal matter.
Thanks for reading.
..Ex

Ummm how can she be guilty?
Its of herself
Damn im sick of the government thinking they can tell people what to do all the time with everything.
If she wants to put the pictures and show them to other 14yo's how is that illegal?
I guess she didn't set the pictures to private.

[edit on 27-3-2009 by aLiiEn]

Originally posted by calihan_12
the weird, awkward kid in high school.. why was he weird and awkward?


he was the kid who didnt watch tv, or read magazines etc. and didnt know what clothes were "cool" etc. because of it.

This is the most ludicrous thing I've heard in the past week, speaking as the awkward, uncool kid in high school. Watched TV constantly, read magazines, etc. I wasn't blind to social trends in fashion, etc.

My parents refused to pay for name brands because the money wasn't there and it was against their set of values regardless to pay more for something because of the brand. I was also awkward thanks to years of predatory bullying from the "cool" kids.

Uncool kids are often uncool because the herd decides it's so.

reply to post by calihan_12


That could possibly be that
1) they are old and don't care
2) many of them started having sex along time ago before std was an issue
3) you are dating a widow that was married to the same person for 50 years and you don't think they could have an std


remember they are beyond their reproductive years so I am wondering if condoms are not an issue with them.



[edit on 27-3-2009 by nixie_nox]

Originally posted by TravelerintheDark

Originally posted by calihan_12
the weird, awkward kid in high school.. why was he weird and awkward?


he was the kid who didnt watch tv, or read magazines etc. and didnt know what clothes were "cool" etc. because of it.

This is the most ludicrous thing I've heard in the past week, speaking as the awkward, uncool kid in high school. Watched TV constantly, read magazines, etc. I wasn't blind to social trends in fashion, etc.

My parents refused to pay for name brands because the money wasn't there and it was against their set of values regardless to pay more for something because of the brand. I was also awkward thanks to years of predatory bullying from the "cool" kids.

Uncool kids are often uncool because the herd decides it's so.

I have to agree wholeheartedly with Traveler here, I was in the same boat though for a slightly different reason.

I was well aware of what was considered cool; I just didn't care.

Yes, but they arent using protection even though they should be.

Thats the point im trying to make. They know all the side effects of having unportected sex... but they still do it..

Just like teenagers know the side effects.. but they still do it.

reply to post by calihan_12


hence the reason for number 2. they started having sex when sex wasn't talked about.was married to the same person for 50 years, and are now dabbling again.

so there is a chance they don't know.

maybe we need to put sex ed in nursing homes.*chuckles*


[edit on 27-3-2009 by nixie_nox]

Originally posted by calihan_12
Yes, but they arent using protection even though they should be.

According to whom?

Thats the point im trying to make. They know all the side effects of having unportected sex... but they still do it..

Thankfully, most old people are past child bearing age and aren't dropping a bunch of welfare babies into the already often over-burdened system. Past that, STD's are personal problems that don't inflict themselves on the population too badly.
There are exceptions to that rule of course, as any other.

This is plain too stupid.

There should be NO law telling people what to do with their own body.

Should she post nude pictures of herself? Of course not, but then again it's up to her parents to ground her or punish her. Myspace should only remove her pictures.

End of story.

I'd also like to say you can not usually victimize yourself. It defies the very definition of the word. To be a victim is to be an unwilling participant. If she unwilling, or unwittingly, took pictures of herself to post on MySpace, she has an issue that goes well beyond the one being discussed. This boils down to nothing more than a gross need for attention. Lack of responsible action is at the heart of any criminal behavior. It is not an excuse to be young.

As so many have pointed out, children are aware of sex and sexuality. They are aware of the power is possess since that can be seen on television, heard in music, etc, the one issue I will lay on entertainment. It's an obvious way to draw the attention so many people these days are desperately craving to the point of humiliation.

reply to post by nyk537


A COP OUT!! Have you lost your mind or do you live in a bubble? Look at advertisements and sexual situations on primetime tv now adays! There are over 100 sexual acts or innuendos every hour. If I try to be a good parent and discipline my child I get labeled and have them taken from me! Just because my child makes a phone call..... If this was my child I would wip her ... so bad she wouldnt see straight. I would not have her labeled as a pediphile! Besides herself who did she hurt!!!

reply to post by bobbylove321


People who say that must not have 14 year old daughters.

*shrugs*

reply to post by scanepchi


This is getting ridiculous. She shouldn't be labeled as a sex offender or anything else, she's a kid who did something quite stupid. The idea that she will maybe be convicted of distributing and manufacturing child pornography is ludicrous. Go after the old men and women who take pictures of kids instead of this girl!

As to what someone else said here about men getting convicted when the girls are after them. I would say that the man knows the law and if he engages in sex with an underage girl, whether she is hitting on him or not it is his own fault if he gets charged and convicted and destroys his life.

If she lies about her age that is a different story. It's so unfair when girls in clubs tell guys they're 18 and then the guys find out they're 15. That has happened here in the UK.

Not to come in here beating some kinda drum or anything like that...

BUT...

You're all wrong about who is at fault... Both the Parents and Modern Media are to blame.

The parents for not taking enough of an interest in the rearing and upbringing (morally etc) of their own child.

It's the media's fault for focusing on the children as the new consumers.

There is a Documentary out now called "Consuming Children" that is a study in marketing to children from birth to the Teenage Years. To put it bluntly after watching this documentary, I became nervous that I was doing the same thing to my child with the little T.V. Time he gets.

here's the preview for the Documentary. I assure you the full film has some very disturbing information, especially pertaining to marketing to young women/little girls as one and the same...



Basically these sick bastards are selling sex to your 10 year old daughter... (i.e. Bratz toys, halter-top shirts, Mini-Skirts Etc) And whats worse, you're so busy being a 'provider' that you let them buy into the sexual ploy.

Seriously after watching the entire movie, I HAVE to say I think that modern marketers are nothing but a bunch of pedophiles (or morons who can't sell to children without making them feel like adults)

Whatever Happened to the innocent years? Hell I was on the net at 14; but I was also BMX biking, Paintballing, and just roaming around with friends... Now 14 year olds are trying to get some booty on myspace by posting racier and racier pics.

:shakes head:

coven

reply to post by coven


Star for that

Man, I have to watch that now. Thanks!

I think the point needs to be made that at 14 she isn't a child, nor is she an adult, she is a teenager, physically sexually mature, with sexual desires that are completely natural. While posting her pictures shows that she is not emotionally or mentally mature enough for sex, let's not forget that many adults are not emotionally or mentally mature for relationships, and I suspect that is becoming more and more common these days.

I was a teenager in the seventies, and I would say that a majority of the kids in high school were sexually active, and most of them grew up to be well adjusted adults, while there are people who did not become sexually active until after they were over 18 who fail as becoming well adjusted people. The point is that we are too obsessed with sex, and that is the bigger problem. Teenage sex has been going on for a long, long time, Juliet, as in "Romeo and Juliet", was what, only 14. Heck, I think they first introduced us as kids to that story when we were in Jr High, 12 or 13 years old, the ultimate love story about teenage sex.

Turning teenage sex into a crime is wrong, very, very wrong. Sure, go after the adults who are praying on teenagers for sex, but leave teenagers alone to experiment, which is how people become mature enough to deal with relationships. It is not like the old days when a teenage girl was married to some guy much older than her, remember Paris from "Romeo and Juliet"? Now days, with more freedom, especially for women, people need to develop a better understanding of how to develop relationships, and that means experimentation.

If you had sex as a minor, even if you wound up marrying the guy and spending the rest of your life with him, you are being a hypocrite calling for prosecution of teenagers who did what you yourself did as a teenager. Arresting this girl will undoubtedly damage the girl more than her being sexually active.

As a society, we have really gone off the edge when they start labeling girls as sexual predators for putting nude pictures of herself on the web. Oh, and plenty of girls were having sex with guys over the age of eighteen back in the seventies, remember "Fast Times at Ridgemont High"? I knew plenty of girls in high school who thought that was cool.

reply to post by poet1b


She's not a sexual predator.

But it can't be argued that she did not distribute child pornography.