How "the law of attraction" works

reply to post by Illahee


I did my first wave that day you posted (or was it a day after).

I´ll do my second wave of intentions in your direction tommorow.

Illusions and Vanitas are joining in, sc is already in, now maybe the Bandit will add his waves and you´ll have a hurricane of change.

Originally posted by Skyfloating

Knowledge/Belief are two density-levels of the same thing. Not knowing about something makes it a bit easier not to experience that.

Philosophically speaking, most of what you think you "know" you only actually have a belief about. (there are long philosophical arguments demonstrating this which I will spare you, but in short, most of what you think you "know" is pure hearsay, and could be false, you havent actually taken the time to prove it yourself, hence you believe it to be true, you dont "know" it is true) Including your own memories of your past, many studies have been done about memory, and bottom line, they are incredibly flexible. So in that sense I agree completely that knowledge (as we use the term) and belief are two variations on the same theme.

You Know what you experience in the precise moment your awareness focuses itself on the present. Belief is always out of the moment, and non-experiential. (It requires leaving the moment to say "I believe.") Knowing is always in the moment, and experiential, (though intuitive knowledge is not experiential in a physical way.)

reply to post by Skyfloating


Consider it done...

I'll change my beliefs about it using myeasygoals.com.

Originally posted by Vanitas
reply to post by Skyfloating

 

OK, I am perfectly alright with that definition of fear!

Unfortunately, all too many people do not have the discernment about who their real friends are...

(And I mean it.)

I took this out of context during a discussion of hermiting in order to see clarity and your will. I find that I know who my friends are when I have hermited. Those people that miss me, or stop by during those times. I may run into old friends in weird places while I am "away". I also do it to open the door to new friendship. To hold the old at bay and see what new things it brings me. There are also people who never call, and I take that into account too. Or I look at who I miss, and would like to have back. ($.02)

Originally posted by Illahee
reply to post by stikkinikki

 

I believe it is the one philosophy that lets us know God as he is within us. It is highly rejected by any undeveloped soul and there is a clear reason. If we accept that we are creators with the knowledge of Good and Evil within us, we are forced to take accountability for our actions. All of them.

The ones who reject the philosophy refuse to be accountable for very little in their lives as well.

I have been thinking about your statement a lot in the last few days. I can come up with lots of examples of not taking responsiblity for what could have been part of my creation. Where I have blamed the mirror so to speak. But when people are forceful with their beliefs toward you, why are we not able to stop it if we don't hold that behavior as part of our beliefs. Are you saying we harbor subconsious beliefs that we are victims when we are hurt by others?( For example.) A belief you would not be fully aware of until it happened to you. So then you would have to pay attention, deny it or ignore it, and it would never happen again?

Originally posted by seagrass

But when people are forceful with their beliefs toward you, why are we not able to stop it if we don't hold that behavior as part of our beliefs. Are you saying we harbor subconsious beliefs that we are victims when we are hurt by others?( For example.) A belief you would not be fully aware of until it happened to you. So then you would have to pay attention, deny it or ignore it, and it would never happen again?

Think of it this way, you are (presumably, judging from your comments to Skyfloating) a female. If someone came at you, very angry, and said you were a crappy man, would you be hurt? Or if they said you were a bad dog, or the crappiest fish they had ever seen, would you be offended?

Or would you just look at them as if they had lost their mind and be puzzled as to what they were on about?

You dont need to hold a belief that you are a victim per se to be hurt by a specific comment, but you do need to harbor some belief that what they are saying may be the truth about you. And yes, it probably would be an unconscious belief or feeling that that may be the truth about yourself. Having it come up in your mirror allows you the opportunity to see reflected in the words or behavior of an "other" feelings you have in yourself, sometimes feelings you have about yourself.

Denying or ignoring it would not make it stop. It might make it stop from that specific angle, but that issue would likely arise again in another form. To make the issue lose its power to hurt you, to cause a reaction in you, you need to recognize that issue in yourself, and then make a specific statement to yourself about the truth or fallacy of that issue. For instance, if someone were to call you a name and you were very hurt by that, to recognize that some part yourself must believe that or suspect that that might be true, or it would roll off your back like water. If it hurts you, (say someone calls you "stupid") you need to ask yourself if that is really true, or if you harbor some doubt about your intellect. You need to examine the underlying belief with conscious awareness, and then, also with awareness, process the feeling that hearing that or believing that might cause you, and restate it to yourself. For instance, (assuming that perhaps the belief may have come from, say, being dyslexic and internalizing that belief in the past) "I have exactly the intellect I require to be the best version of me that is possible. It may not work like so and so's, but it is perfect for the things I do best and want to do."

It could of course be a reflection of some sense of victimhood overall, but it is important in using the mirror to really look and see which aspect is hurting. What are you telling yourself? If you are saying, "Why does everyone treat me so bad?" That would be a clue to the generalized victim thing. If you said, "I cant believe that *&%$# called me stupid!" Then it is more likely that the specific term hit the mark, not the general sense of being picked on.

The key is to use your awareness, your consciousness, to ask yourself what specifically is happening and why it hurts you. Not why they are doing it, (it isnt about them at all) but why you are reacting to it. Where is the fear, belief, etc., in yourself that makes that particular barb sting and not amuse you? If someone called me a crappy fish I would laugh. Same with any insult I did not believe could possibly be true. The insults/slights that do show up in our mirrors as painful are those we harbor within, and the reason they show up is that our truest, highest Self, (with a capital S) wants to be free of that particular illusion. (Perhaps you have asked for a better life, more respect, to finish college, etc) It will make you hear or experience it as many times as is required for you to examine the truth of that statement so that you can free yourself of the tyranny of that belief, to clear the path or way for some intended manifestation. (Something you really want but are blocking yourself from unconsciously)

reply to post by Illusionsaregrander


Wow, that's some solid philosophy there. Thank you so much for such an astute analysis of a very common problem. You're absolutely right - if we didn't believe it we wouldn't care one lick. Definitely something to make sure is in the fore of our minds. Thanks!

Crappy fish! lol. Yes I am female.
Thank you very much IAG. I will spend time on that.

So our life is like a Hall of Endless Mirrors, that we decide which ones we want to look in and explore. Say you are in a relationship where you don't like how you behave or react when you are with them. Does the conscious act of "leaving, giving up, I'm not taking this anymore" work to change your view in the mirror better, than saying "This is not what I believe is right for me, I don't deserve this, etc" I guess my question is how much is action worth as compared to think/feeling.

reply to post by Illusionsaregrander

I respect the mirror analogy you have shared. There is a truth that resonates in it. The issue of negativity and its influence upon our personal lives warrants indepth discussion, and I for one, have gained a much needed insight.

Thank you!

You can start listing the things that you like about your relationship with your partner and what you like about you partner.

Write the list and for each statement, write down that you are grateful for them.

There is also z-point, which you can try out. I have been able to modify the relationship I have with my relatives and friends using this.

Heal Painful Relationships with ZPoint (PDF file!)

Thank you for the post, and I did it on my brother. He should be back from Poland and the Ukraine shortly. I will be interested to see if we are better together when he arrives. He went to Egypt and I am interested in what he has to say about it.

reply to post by Illahee


Thank you.
And I just want you to know that lately, due to the extraordinary circumstances I've been living in for the past year or so - and because I am a sorry weakling - I can only work in short "blasts". So, if you have noticed any sudden peaks... that's probably me.

Just kidding.
But I will definitely try to improve my "output".

Originally posted by seagrass
Does the conscious act of "leaving, giving up, I'm not taking this anymore" work to change your view in the mirror better, than saying "This is not what I believe is right for me, I don't deserve this, etc" I guess my question is how much is action worth as compared to think/feeling.

There isnt a "one size fits all" response, unfortunately. In each particular "reflection" you have to really examine, with your own calm awareness and consciousness, what the mirror is reflecting to you and what the appropriate response is.

For instance, if you are in a situation that is physically threatening, like standing under a rock that is about to fall, there may very well be some way that changing your reaction and belief about that situation may physically change the circumstance, but, you have to ask yourself honestly, "is that where I really am in my understanding and mastery of the physical world at this point in time?" For virtually all of us, the answer is "no, I cannot yet manifest an immediate change in my physical reality simply by changing my internal state." If you are NOT actually at the point in time where changing your internal state of being brings an instant change in the physical world, then be honest about that, (accept/love yourself as you are) and physically step out from under the rock that is about to fall.

The above applies to any physical relationship in which you may find yourself in peril. Whether that relationship is with a rock, a car, an animal or a person.

If the relationship is one that isnt physically dangerous, and only emotionally uncomfortable, you have more room to experiment, and question yourself longer. You have the luxury of trying to modify your beliefs and feelings about the situation and seeing how the mirror responds. Or, if you are not at the point where you are able to do that honestly, and you feel your reaction overwhelming you, it is a perfectly valid to ask yourself, "Do I feel the need to stand here and suffer? Or do I feel I am entitled to remove myself and deal with my reaction to this situation privately in a more calm place?"

Ultimately, you have to accept your own feelings about what you need to do to give yourself the time to process your reaction in a way that doesnt escalate the situation to a point where you are beyond your ability to process it. It isnt about blaming the "other" or yourself for being what you are in that moment. The moment, (including you) just is what it is. Essentially, you are using the LoA in reverse, examining "What is" in your life to discern your current feelings and beliefs about yourself and the world.

What you may first find about the physical world is that as you accept/love yourself more, and stop forcing, repressing, and judging yourself, you may notice you suddenly seem to be standing under a lot less rocks that are about to fall. They simply arent on your path. You may also find less people standing in front of you telling you, "You are so ________." (Insert hurtful comment there)

When dealing with someone "in your face," a brother as in your example, when he begins the "script" that you and he habitually act out, listen to it like it was the first time you have ever heard it. Watch yourself, your reaction, the feelings that arise in you, the "lines" that come into your head that correspond to your part of the play, etc. Then look at your brother, really look at him. Watch him breathe, watch his facial expressions, really look at him and SEE him in that moment. Put yourself as fully into that moment as you can, BE there, by seeing everything, hearing every nuance, smelling everything, feeling every feeling. Know, not just think, that he is not different from you. Listen to what he is telling you as if it were a great secret. It is. In the case of a family member, he is probably telling you a family belief about the world and how you relate to it. Again, it isnt about him. Dont examine his motives, or attribute any to him, other than "this is a part of Me (YOU which are a part of All that Is, including him) trying to tell me something I feel or believe that I am unable to see on my own." Dont see some "other," some enemy, attacking you, see some aspect of your Self, (in the most Divine/Universal sense) telling you about an internal conflict you carry.

Of course if it gets too intense, excuse yourself. Stay as close to the truth when doing so as you can. (The REAL truth, for instance say "I am overwhelmed by my feelings right now, and I cant handle any more at this time." instead of "I hate you, you are a jerk for saying such things." Anger is a secondary emotion, it is a mask for fear/pain, try to get to the truer emotion of fear/pain and be honest about it.) Just going off script will change the dynamic. Refusing to attack back in many cases will diffuse their attack. (Verbal attack, assuming the person is a loved one not known to be dangerous, it isnt a hard and fast rule that applies to all things and all situations.)

These of course are examples only. The truth is that every single situation has its own "right" way, and if you take the time, and can maintain the presence of mind, to pull yourself into the moment by looking intensely at yourself and the "other" you will find it. You always have what you need, you just need, as Jesus said, "eyes to see it and ears to hear it." You need your full awareness in that moment, so that you do not get lost in the script of how things went before, or how you anticipated they would go this time. Stay inside your Self (your awareness of your body, your feelings, the circumstances) and dont get lost in your self, (your mind, your habits, your story of who you are and who they are.) If you can maintain awareness that you are in truth the former, and that the latter is but an illusion of you, you will find your way through.

WOW. I feel like this is my last chance to heal this old, never ending issue with my brother, as he is moving to another state. I have repeatedly looked inside for the answers in me, why I react and such. That comes naturally to me. I know very well how I feel when I react to his ways. I have tried numerous "experiments" with our relationship. I have tried to forgive, understand, ignore, have self-respect, challenge him etc. I don't think I trust myself to ever be fully honest in my actions because I don't even know what I really feel anymore.(I have tried to feel so many different ways) I am tired of having to maintain self protective behaviors when he is in my presense. I guess I need to decide if what he does and says is really dangerous to me or not. When I was a young girl he was definately dangerous. But he hasn't hurt me physically for many years. Verbally yes. That I can handle easier, when he calls me a "crappy fish" I do laugh today, when I was young I would have believed him. I at least would have considered the idea I might be a fish. I have to say though that it is very difficult to keep your attention on yourself, when someone is talking nonstop about how great they are, and following you around when you are trying to get away, repeatedly. He has a very strong personality, and I am a softy. I like to be "nice".

I forgot to thank you Wise One. Any chance you are near Santa Fe? I was there once. It was magical.

Just maintain your focus on your own actions and reactions and speak as closely to the truth as you can. (Or dont speak at all, just listen and be there if that is too much) What you just said here in this forum was pretty perfect. You wish to repair the relationship with him but arent sure how. He matters to you, and you love/care about him, despite everything that has passed between you. You may not realize that is what you said, but thats what it sounded like to me.

And I am semi-close to Santa Fe, I am in Albuquerque. Taos is wonderful too if you ever get out this way again.

Edit to add;

PS; he probably feels every bit as inadequate as you do deep inside, on the mundane "separate person" level. People who really feel great or powerful dont tend to go around tooting their own horn loudly. They dont need to. A real sense of worth is internal and intrinsic, it isnt dependent on others noticing you or praising you. In a sense, he is both rubbing up against your own internal doubt about your worth, your value, and displaying his own doubt about his own.

[edit on 6-6-2008 by Illusionsaregrander]

I will try again, he will be here on Tueday. I will let you know how I do. Thanks again IAG. Star for you!!

I have been to Taos, and it was very nice. It was in the winter of 1990 I think, and it was lightly snowing. I hear it is heavier these days and you had a hard winter this year. I flew in to Albuquerque. I remember hot air balloons. And I saw Steel Magnolias in a theatre there. We stayed at the La Fonda Hotel. (Also a magical place) I would definately like to go back someday.

reply to post by seagrass


One last thing about your brother and then I will shut up. It really occurred to me that you need to realize that your opinion, both of him and his accomplishments must matter greatly to him for him to tell you loudly, often and persistently about them. It seems that what you think about him (or what he thinks you think about him) impacts his feeling about himself. It sounds like a very clumsy, (and ineffective) way of asking you to validate him.

That actually displays a high opinion of your opinion, not a low one. It also seems to indicate that you matter to him quite a good deal too. You both seem to be after the same thing, (not surprisingly) acceptance and love. Basically, that is what everyone wants.

There is an old law, maybe older even than the LoA; it is that to receive you first have to give.

In this case, not in a phony or fake way, you cant pretend to someone that you are giving them acceptance and love. People can see right through forced or fake efforts of that kind in long term relationships. But when you are focusing internally on yourself and your reaction, perhaps just place your attention on the fact that he needs that love and acceptance from you or he wouldnt be acting that way. See what just being aware of that little bit of information does.

Please don't shut up, unless this is not appropriate for this LoA forum. You have much to say that is worth something to me. Most likely many.


If I believed that I would cry. But he does it to everyone. He insists on having all attention on himself from everyone. Which led me to believe that he just will never feel good about himself. It is embarassing to see your 47 year old brother never outgrow it. Never feel good about himself. I can totally relate to not feeling good about yourself, but his approach offends me. Offends my sense of fairness to others. Sure deep down I would like to have attention on all my "greatness" as a mirror. I would like my opinions to be valuable, but I feel he forces me to do it. Knowing I will be "nice". I have tried to be patient, honor his needs, give him praise to help. It seemed to create a monster. I have always put my self down to compensate for that energy. Or he and I both set it up that way to make it work. I allow it. I am the comic relief, scapegoat, and slave.