Wish Corruption Game

GRANTED:

But all the iron workers are really upset with you and start rioting in the streets, you are
placed into protective custody with a special tinfoil hat inhibitor that prevents you from
being to melt anything except your own memories.

I wish I could speak every language in the world...

"tough one"

Granted....

but...

You develop severe Dyslexia and can only speak backwards. The other countries that have hired you to translate get so upset, they sew your lips together and send you to a deserted island.

I wish I could play the piano...

Semper

Granted, but you only know how to play those little kids ones and you get laughed at.

I wish I could go to the moon!

Granted..

But...

You discover it really is made of cheese and you're Lactose Intolerant....

I wish I owned the entire State of West Virginia...

Semper

Granted, but a freak earthquake makes it sink into the sea.

I wish I had an ATS t-shirt!

Granted!
But when it is sent through the post it is 4 sizes to small and you decide to give it to the kids next door!!!!!!!!!
I wish Pepperslappy the O.P decided to join in on his thread!!!

Granted, but then the thread gets locked!

I wish I could order a pizza!

Granted.

But after the pizza guy leaves you open the box to discover a ransom note:

"Pepperslappy has been kidnapped by a horde of angry wishers who's wishes have all been corrupted...you have 24 hours to set things right or the Pepperslappy man dies"

I wish I could type without looking at the keys.

[edit on 10/28/2006 by justgeneric]

Granted!!
But you just type alot of jibberish, dfihl flfh efh f lwkehj lan...
I wish the sky was a nice shade of purple!!!

Granted, but the purple is caused by a new weapon that eradicates all life on Earth.

I wish I could control the elements!

Granted...

But...

You make a mistake at the subatomic level and destroy the entire universe..

I wish I could meet God..

Semper

GRANTED:

But he looks just like your ol' marine drill sargent and you go crazy thinking about it.

I wish I could make the perfect forum post.

Granted, but it's so perfect, it has sentience. With this new feeling, the post takes over the internet, eventually gaining access to all the nuclear missile silos on the planet. We all die.

I wish I could have the knowledge of everyone on the planet.

Granted!
But you gain too much knowledge, and your brain becomes useless beacuse it cant handle the pressure!
I wish I could walk through walls!

Granted, but you walk through a wall, not realising there's a cliff on the other side.

Jeex, what is it with me and cliffs?

I wish I could time travel.

granted!
but you travel too far into the past, and are brutally eaten by a dinosaur.
I wish i could paint my nails without getting the poilsh on my fingertips.

granted.

You invent the perfect nail polishing system but the evil aesthetician at the local beauty salon become insane with jealousy and breaks in to your house and kills you in your sleep.

I wish I wasn't allergic to wheat.

Granted. But now your are allergic to every other food. Spending the rest of your life eating wheat based products.

I wish I had a PS3 right now.

Granted, but you realise that it's so bad, with so few games, that you sell it and buy a 360 instead.

I wish I had Halo 3 right now!

Granted! But you end up loving it so much that you become addicted and play for days on end without any sleep and end up looking like your avatar!

I wish I could look like Angelina Jolie