Cold turkey alcohol withdrawal cured my addiction, am I a freak of nature?

Happy to hear you found happiness and new life as well! Like you said one would think their phone broke!

All the best to you.

a reply to: Raiden72

No, you are not a freak. Some people are able to kick alcohol without medical intervention. My grandma was one such person. My mom, however, almost died from her withdrawals, and had to be medically supervised. Every person is different.

a reply to: angeltone
HI there, I believe it can be done too and for some, it might be the right way to do it.

I drank heavily from my teens til my mid twenties as a form of self medication until I was so sick of what it was doing to my life. All in all, only about ten years but they were horrendous. I got dropped off alone at a house on a run down farm that I didn't recognize, apparently because I was being argumentative. The first few days were all heart pounding and hallucinations. Then I came through it into the grip of a heavy psychological purging, but still messed up, where I burnt all my clothes, boots, jewellery in the woodstove. It was an an effort to put that life in the past, suggested by the faces in the wood paneling that were still muttering at me days later.
Not the smartest, as I had nothing to wear and no more food after the jars of homemade clam chowder I found in a cupboard ran out. My dog had been dropped off with me and the dog food was low too so I knew I had to go to find a store or town. After wearing a sheet for a few days, I went into the attic and found some old man work pants and a rope to tie them onto me, a scratchy wool stanfield and socks. There were boxes of books in there, old classics, a bunch of Castaneda's books and oddly a couple Alcoholics Anonymous books. I eventually read them all cover to cover and learned about the psychology behind my drinking. The Castaneda books helped the most. Never went to AA meetings but I figured if their concept worked of handing over power to a higher power, I'd give it a try. I walked to town in socks, felt further ashamed then realized that I needed to feel strong to change my life and that was the moment the fog cleared. I met that higher power.

I never considered myself an alcoholic though so that's why I figured I could quit anytime without being a lifelong "alcoholic" . The reason I thought this was I never bought alcohol unless there was an event going on, or if others were doing other substances I do that with them instead of drinking. Often, I didn't even drink but when I did I was blind drunk and out of control. But if people were around me partying for days/weeks I went downhill badly and that's why they dumped me there. My family were binge drinkers too, so I thought it was pretty normal til I saw the mess I'd made. I used to say to people that if you buy into being an alcoholic you won't be able to stop... there may be some truth to it but I don't think it's for everyone. Some may need help.

I quit for two years without even wanting to drink. After that on the odd, rare occasion, like xmas dinner or such, I'd be able to have a drink without a problem. My mind always went back to being dropped on that farm alone, how horrible the hallucinations were, how scared I was. Now, I've simply lost my taste for it, maybe a glass of wine a couple times a year but I get terrible hangovers with even one drink, so it isn't at all appealing.

This is the first time I've ever really written this out.

You seem to have discovered that where there's a will there's a way. The impetus for change must come from within.

a reply to: angeltone

Yes.
2nd line.

originally posted by: Brassmonkey
Alcoholism is a disease was classified so by the American Medical Association in 1954. It’s a chronic , progressive, fatal disease And anyone who thinks it’s a moral issue of will power is uneducated, and really needs to read the 100s off peer reviewed scientific studies proving this.

Congratulations it sounds like you aren’t an alcoholic!
I say this from many years Sober that real alcoholics can’t quit under their own will power. A real alcoholic does not have the ability to control the amount they drink once it’s injested or be able to quit when they promise themselves to quit or moderate.

It took 7 years and 6 rehabs, 3 detoxes and 3 psychiatric wards for me to even admit thatI had a drinking problem.

When I asked God to relieve me of the obsession to drink and I turned my life and my will over to him and worked the 12 steps of recovery was when the obsession was lifted.

If anyone can quit on their own my hat is off to you because I certainly tried for years but my so called “ will power” was non existent.

This is the most honest and complete post I've read in awhile!

I agree 100% with everything in it...including the OP was not a real alcoholic!

No amount of self will could relieve the symptoms of a true alcoholic!

Thank you for posting Brassmonkey...it was refreshing!

originally posted by: angeltone
a reply to: Silcone Synapse
Omg mate I'm a former 90's raver, I saw the hypocrisy of drug legislation way back then.
I was scoring coke and MDMA for junior government ministers while on detachment in London, just so I'd be the fall guy if anyone was getting caught!🤣
MDMA remains my favourite drug, and I was dancing at a few places last summer, cops were laughing when they told me they don't give a # about drugs, coz thousands of people dancing at a licensed event had zero violence solely because nobody was drunk!
One cop said he'd rather work a festival site than ANY high street on a weekend!🤣

I was in London lots during the late 90's and went to tons of raves. The ones I went to were wonderful and so welcoming of all people. Many just came after work, wearing their dirty work clothes, nothing fancy as it was all about the music. The warehouses were rough, but the sound systems amazing. Cities here in canada were too cliquey and fashionista for me. I do think the ecstasy and music helped heal my soul to some degree. Hard to explain.

One year at burningman, I was talking to the cops on their quads and they said much the same thing about not really caring about drugs unless they saw someone being ridiculously open or dangerous about it. They said it was their favourite work weeks of the year and other cops didn't want to do it but those who had gone kept signing up for it.

a reply to: jerryznv

Not sure if you have that right.

Know lots of lads that use alcohol and are addicted in different ways.

Some lads I know cant function.

Some lads live for the weekend.

Some lads...

For me it makes it easier to face the world.

originally posted by: collie
a reply to: jerryznv

Not sure if you have that right.

Know lots of lads that use alcohol and are addicted in different ways.

Some lads I know cant function.

Some lads live for the weekend.

Some lads...

For me it makes it easier to face the world.

Here...this is from real alcoholics...and what they believe alcoholism to be:

Alcoholics Anonymous

Real alcoholics believe no human power could have relieved their symptoms (including self).

""There is one that has all power...may you find him now."!

i had a friend who was pretty bad.

the cops would pick him up and take him home instead of jail.

they didn't want to be responsible if he went into the DT's.

you are a lucky dude, op.

god bless your recovery.

Thanks for posting that Jerry, I never mentioned in my previous posts but AA, meetings and higher power are all factors that contributed to me being sober and staying sober. I quit cold turkey sure but I didn’t do it by myself.

After my first year sober I was a mentor for a year in AA/NA a sponsor as they call it.

Sadly I had to stop doing it, for my own well being. The programme can be wonderful and supportive but for me I had sponsored two friends of my mine from my old ways. They both died as a result of their addictions, I took this very hard like I had failed them. It happened one after the other about 5 weeks apart. I knew they alone where responsible for their actions but there was still a part of me that always thought could I have done more for them. So I had to distance myself at least for now from helping with the programme.

I still attend the odd meeting here and there. To vent or to share.

The 12 steps can really set a person free, but you have to be completely and totally honest with oneself. For some people it’s daunting I know because for me it felt like truly meeting myself for the first time.
a reply to: jerryznv

a reply to: angeltone

Don't let your guard down. I have known folk to relapse after long years of sobriety. My Father was an alcoholic and it seemed to me as a child that he would go four or five years then start the cycle again. But I was a child so I saw it through a child's eyes. I congratulate you on your success it was no easy feat.

Cold turkey can be deadly. Though some people manage it alone. I think it is half determination and half luck.

I did not have an addiction problem but I was on opioids for 3 months for an injury to my spinal cord.

3 months I was in agony and bedbound. One morning I woke up and said I had had enough. The pills kept me sleeping, the only way to actually stop me from feeling the pain. But it was not living.

I stopped all my meds cold turkey. When I saw the doctor a month later, he was so proud of my progress, until he handed me my prescriptions for refills on my pain pills. When I told him I had stopped taking them a month ago, he turned green.

He asked me how I had weaned off the meds. I told him I didn't. I just stopped taking them. He told that I can't just stop taking them, that that would kill me.

I told him I had just stopped taking them, and I am still alive. He asked me how I was dealing with the pain, I told him, "One second at a time."

Maybe we are both freaks of nature, but I learned the Jedi mind tricks. Intractable pain is never going to go away. You either allow it to suck up all pleasures in your life and stop living, or you do a Vulcan mind meld and carry it like your Siamese twin, and get on living the best life you can live.

Being a freak of nature is a good thing.

originally posted by: Brassmonkey

Congratulations it sounds like you aren’t an alcoholic!
I say this from many years Sober that real alcoholics can’t quit under their own will power. A real alcoholic does not have the ability to control the amount they drink once it’s injested or be able to quit when they promise themselves to quit or moderate.

It took 7 years and 6 rehabs, 3 detoxes and 3 psychiatric wards for me to even admit thatI had a drinking problem.

I think much of it all is how addicting things are in general to a person and everyone is different. In your case do you find other things in your life very addicting hard to brake, most likely not. There are people that can use hard drugs as a every once in a while, recreational type event and never get addicted. My dad could stop smoking cold turkey whenever he desired, but just loved to smoke, so he would stop for 3 or 4 months at a time with no effort. My mom couldn't go a day without one.

The interesting part is addiction is mainly environmentally related. There was a famous study after the Vietnam war were like 10,000 people who used heron over there were followed and 90% of those who stated over there with it stopped once they came home and 90% that used it before they left kept on using it. So, in your case did your environment change any?

Ah phewie. I drank like a fish and smoked like a chimney. I do neither now and just gave up the durries cold turkey like the booze.

Don’t have any urge to recommit or substitute vices. The chemical alteration of your biology is a constant process and runs both ways.
There is no permanent circumstance in reality, everything is constantly changing, how you view or direct that change is a conscious decision.

a reply to: CrazyWater

originally posted by: collie
a reply to: angeltone

All I got from this is that if I give up drinking I get a swollen testicle.

I drink too much, glad you came out the other side.

Edit here after reading comments.

This is a big problem that I personally have, instead of looking at what it is, I make a joke about it.

After being used to a long term alcohol addiction I find the solution worse than the problem. That is the problem in itself.

Hats off to you though mate.

So you had to ditch all the people around you too then with that lifestyle?

Oh I've quoted you in full because you it touched me quite deeply.
I actually read it when falling asleep in bed his morning/last night, before you edited it.
I actually laughed out, genuinely, it's the exact same dark humour any one of my male mates can come out with!
It's a group humour thing that usually then develops into actual safe discussion about the topic without defences needing to be raised.

So when I read your edit mate, you can totally see why that touched me, I genuinely laughed out loud before my head hit the pillow, but today I am touched.

In rough as # male group settings all my life, that dark humour is the only thing that opens us up to honest talk, and stops us beating each other up at the same time!

So thanks for sharing, don't lose your dark humour, and I'm sending all my positive thoughts to you now, wherever you are in the world...never stop believing in yourself!❤️🌍

*****************************

To everyone else who has replied so far can I say thank you, with deep sincerity.
I've read some fantastically honest posts, I've starred everyone so far, and I'm learning much about everyone else's raw and unique experiences.

What I've also learned is my thread title was clumsily condensed, so I'll explain myself a bit more here now...

When I say I am cured of the addiction, what I mean is my mind completely rewired itself through the days of hallucinations.
The absolute terror and horrors that I faced, and survived, left me overwhelming changed.
I sobbed tears of joy when it stopped, a feeling of relief, deeper than anything that's ever happened in my life, that it had stopped, Instantly I actually feared alcohol, and the feeling is exactly the same right now.

When I'm say carrying wine in my backpack to a female friends home, I feel massively aware of the dangerous substance I have so close to my body!

This all may sound unusual but it's exactly how I feel it and deeply honest. I consider myself a cured alcoholic because it's a drug I fear now, my brain absolutely fears it, I haven't changed in that regard since the last hallucination stopped.

I considered myself 'in recovery' from the moment I finished my last drink, to the moment the final hallucination horrors stopped. That whole process lasted about a week and every day since then I identify now as 'recovered'.

The only thing that will ever change things for me is if I ever drink alcohol again. All the rewiring in my brain through the week of hallucinations would be completely destroyed I reckon with just one double vodka.
My brain would lose the fear, feel brave and confident that I could control the drug, I'd wake the next day feeling #...oh just one drink settle the nerves...oh I'll stop tomorrow for 24hrs...grumpy wanting to drink again...all the good brain rewiring absolutely destroyed 😥

So yep, as long as I never ever let that substance into my blood stream again, my fear of it will remain the overwhelming dominant emotion I feel, so I am completely cured of any desire for the substance.

Cold turkey was the ONLY thing that could stop ME becoming one of the 'broken souls' that the NHS tried to turn me into, in permanent 'recovery', comforted with their drugs, never cured of the addiction, too scared to walk through the booze aisle in the supermarket in case it triggers cravings ffs.
I walk through the booze aisle and I genuinely shudder like I'm walking through a bio hazard chemical dealers🤣...and I never want to lose that actual healthy fear again!

Oh I've been rambling now sorry, but I'm rough still from my badly swollen ball bag and strong antibiotics mentioned in my OP🤣

So thanks again to everyone contributing here, the deeply honest replies are deeply touching, and show's the frailties we all equally share as fellow humans.
I shall continue reading and starring tonight but I'm done with typing with my thumb now...gonna drink lots of hot chocolate and read ATS!

Oh off topic lol, when I came out of my forced coma, the very first site I went to on my phone was ATS, I wanted to immediately know if I'd missed anything important, and ATS was my number 1 world resource!!!👍👍👍

a reply to: igloo

Omg mate I had to reply to this, your tale is a massive self belief story of fighting back from 'sheet wearing 'rock bottom, and #ing pulling it off on your own.
Thanks so much for sharing it, and I hope just one person looking for self belief reads your story and is massively inspired that no matter the depths they reach, they can climb back out if they just never stop believing!!!
Genuine big love and positive emotions flying now to wherever you are in the world! 🌍❤️

originally posted by: jerryznv

originally posted by: Brassmonkey
Alcoholism is a disease was classified so by the American Medical Association in 1954. It’s a chronic , progressive, fatal disease And anyone who thinks it’s a moral issue of will power is uneducated, and really needs to read the 100s off peer reviewed scientific studies proving this.

Congratulations it sounds like you aren’t an alcoholic!
I say this from many years Sober that real alcoholics can’t quit under their own will power. A real alcoholic does not have the ability to control the amount they drink once it’s injested or be able to quit when they promise themselves to quit or moderate.

It took 7 years and 6 rehabs, 3 detoxes and 3 psychiatric wards for me to even admit thatI had a drinking problem.

When I asked God to relieve me of the obsession to drink and I turned my life and my will over to him and worked the 12 steps of recovery was when the obsession was lifted.

If anyone can quit on their own my hat is off to you because I certainly tried for years but my so called “ will power” was non existent.

This is the most honest and complete post I've read in awhile!

I agree 100% with everything in it...including the OP was not a real alcoholic!

No amount of self will could relieve the symptoms of a true alcoholic!

Thank you for posting Brassmonkey...it was refreshing!

Gosh, I hope I've done the quotes right, and the bold text tags I added about me NOT being an alcoholic???!!!

I don't really know what to say except that I was drinking at minimum 1litre of 40% (ABV NOT US proof) Vodka every single day in before my second attempt at cold turkey.
I was physically dependent on the drug, convulsing and shaking within hous of not drinking.
The NHS itself marked my medical certificate for benefits/insurance claims, as "alcohol dependency', and I experienced a week of hallucinations more scary than ANYTHING I have ever experienced in my nearly half century alive.

I can only say that if I wasn't an alcoholic, then whatever label you'd give me, I'm still just overwhelmingly relieved, and joyous, that I cured my condition by believing only in myself, on my own, in the lockdown world of 2020...and I lived to share my deeply honest story😁😁😁

originally posted by: angeltone

originally posted by: jerryznv

originally posted by: Brassmonkey
Alcoholism is a disease was classified so by the American Medical Association in 1954. It’s a chronic , progressive, fatal disease And anyone who thinks it’s a moral issue of will power is uneducated, and really needs to read the 100s off peer reviewed scientific studies proving this.

Congratulations it sounds like you aren’t an alcoholic!
I say this from many years Sober that real alcoholics can’t quit under their own will power. A real alcoholic does not have the ability to control the amount they drink once it’s injested or be able to quit when they promise themselves to quit or moderate.

It took 7 years and 6 rehabs, 3 detoxes and 3 psychiatric wards for me to even admit thatI had a drinking problem.

When I asked God to relieve me of the obsession to drink and I turned my life and my will over to him and worked the 12 steps of recovery was when the obsession was lifted.

If anyone can quit on their own my hat is off to you because I certainly tried for years but my so called “ will power” was non existent.

This is the most honest and complete post I've read in awhile!

I agree 100% with everything in it...including the OP was not a real alcoholic!

No amount of self will could relieve the symptoms of a true alcoholic!

Thank you for posting Brassmonkey...it was refreshing!

Gosh, I hope I've done the quotes right, and the bold text tags I added about me NOT being an alcoholic???!!!

I don't really know what to say except that I was drinking at minimum 1litre of 40% (ABV NOT US proof) Vodka every single day in before my second attempt at cold turkey.
I was physically dependent on the drug, convulsing and shaking within hous of not drinking.
The NHS itself marked my medical certificate for benefits/insurance claims, as "alcohol dependency', and I experienced a week of hallucinations more scary than ANYTHING I have ever experienced in my nearly half century alive.

I can only say that if I wasn't an alcoholic, then whatever label you'd give me, I'm still just overwhelmingly relieved, and joyous, that I cured my condition by believing only in myself, on my own, in the lockdown world of 2020...and I lived to share my deeply honest story😁😁😁

You were certainly a drunk...no denying that!

See that is where the definition becomes clear...

that I cured my condition

There is no cure for true alcoholism...only relief from the symptoms!

And the fact that you "cured" yourself...well no true alcoholic can cure themselves! Hence the "...no human power could have releived our alcoholism."!

It's in the chapter "How It Works"! Page 60 of the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous!

Our description of the alcoholic, the chapter to the agnostic, and our personal adventures before and after make clear three pertinent ideas:

(a) That we were alcoholic and could not manage our own lives.
(b) That probably no human power could have relieved our alcoholism.
(c) That God could and would if He were sought.

Alcoholics Anonymous

I am glad you have found temporary abstinence though...which is exactly what you have found! Be certain though my freind...if you are truly alcoholic...there is no cure and you cannot maintain abstinence by your own power!

I might recommend you get a copy of the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous and give it a read...you might discover a lot that would be meaningful on your journey!

Here is a downloadable version of the Big Book...give it a look if you'd like!

Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous

That 12 step thing is a cult Jerry. Hate to break it to you but it’s a load of cult brain wash. It’s in a book because it has to be read and learnt because it’s a cult.

Wrote it the third time for the dummies.

a reply to: jerryznv

originally posted by: Dalamax
That 12 step thing is a cult Jerry. Hate to break it to you but it’s a load of cult brain wash. It’s in a book because it has to be read and learnt because it’s a cult.

Wrote it the third time for the dummies.

a reply to: jerryznv

I've heard that many times my friend...it's certainly not original!

It's not for me to say...however...I do know it has been helping alcoholics for almost a hundred years battle something that medical science has yet to find a solution to! Call it whatever you want...it works!

Actually four times...this is a link to the Fourth Addition...lol

I hope everything that you've read and learned isn't tossed into the "cult" category....I mean after all...here you are writing and reading and all that (by the way it's learned...not "learnt")!

Cheers

a reply to: jerryznv

I could probably take AA more serious if it wasn't religion based - God doesn't help anyone it's all in their minds I wish there was a savior that does great things but that fairy tale is false - Just think if it where true 1 God worship him but wouldn't he be the most bored person ever you know knowing everything ?

Anything that requires worship is a dictator not a God .