Arrogance and Hypocrisy

originally posted by: muzzleflash
a reply to: Sheye

Dealing with what's inside is the most important first step, isn't it? How else can we ever find true lasting happiness? We have to fix what's wrong with us and accept and embrace the truth of who we actually are.

Dont tell anyone but I was happy when I was unaware of/ didnt care about my arrogance and assyness just as I am happy now that Im trying to expand myself.

a reply to: Sheye

I've spent the last 6 or 7 years reflecting especially deeply upon the waters of my Soul seeking resolution to my trauma.

This triggered a series of unfortunate events and I made the best choices with what I believed was true. I barely survived the catastrophe of me, up till right now at least.

I changed and am changing, I don't seek to control anyone anymore. I don't hate anyone at all. Im almost impossible to anger these days. I'm no where near perfect but I am getting better at self-discipline as days pass.

The only person I control is me, and even that's a major struggle.

There's no way to control anyone else. You may influence things but there's no way to foresee every possibility or important facet of anything, so we'll always eventually screw things up.

You have to decide what you really want in life and just LET GO of all the baggage.

If you really truly want to experience lasting vibrant happiness, it must be built on a solid foundation. Everyone's stuck in cycles of addiction and temporary satisfaction seeking that become destructive and imprison us spiritually in our own misery.

I want to be Happy, to live a life of Love.
I want to be Compassionate and use my brain to think clearly. I seek to fill my heart with Light and to share it with others in this dark world of corruption and lost souls.

I know who I am. So I have to stop the desire to be controlling, stop hating and being angry at anyone for any reason. I realize it's impossible but that's the stairway to heaven I'm convinced of it.

The key to transcending must be forgiveness and acceptance and then Love. To not blame anyone anymore and finally be FREE.

Just imagine breaking Free from all of it and waking up full of vitality tomorrow, finally filling the void within.

It seems so simple but we all make it so very hard, lol.

a reply to: Sheye

I don't think it's arrogance as much as the nature of human language. Everyone has their own dogma. Dogma is built on a set of assumptions that are considered to be true without any proof. Once these assumptions have been established then all kinds of sentence can be formed that will be in alignment with the dogma's truth.

It's not that people are arrogant it's that they are unaware their own assumptions exist. They just think they have common sense or something. We are very slow to give up the assumptions of their favorite dogmas.

If someone doesn't share the same set of assumptions and different set then things the other person will say will seem insane. This is because people who do not share the same set of assumptions seem insane to each other with certain statements and assertions.

I don't know about hypocrisy unless someone pretends or lies about the assumptions they hold dear to their dogma.

a reply to: muzzleflash

This book may help you with your trauma:

King-Warrior-Magician-Lover Archetypes

And this video:

The Timeless Tale of the Hero's Journey

a reply to: dfnj2015

Yes it's human nature to lean towards dogma and doctrine but it's a crutch we don't need. It's become a chain that binds the Soul into suffering.

originally posted by: muzzleflash
a reply to: Sheye

Dealing with what's inside is the most important first step, isn't it? How else can we ever find true lasting happiness? We have to fix what's wrong with us and accept and embrace the truth of who we actually are.

I’m going to have to respectfully disagree on a few points in this post. Dealing with what is inside is important for me in the sense of honestly examining your conscience to see where you fall short in giving love or offering forgiveness ... but it doesn’t stop there. I have to accept the truth of what I actually am.. and that is a human who will make mistakes and fail at times, no matter how many times they try and change.

I also am a human with a caring heart and I’d be lying if I didn’t say it has been so stomped on by some that it was totally understandable to ‘fight’ back. I’ll find true lasting happiness when my heart doesn’t have to deal with such callousness and cold unloving judgements from others.

To try and pretend anything different would be lying to myself. What I am learning is to accept the forgiveness of God.. not beat myself up, and try and forgive myself... as well as not to rely on support and love of others , because chances are you will be terribly disappointed by some people, and you will end up spending much time healing and trying to fix the damage caused.

a reply to: Sheye

I don't think you disagreed at all.

Most people live a complete lie and aren't even aware of it.

You can find true happiness in the face of turmoils, tribulations, and travails though it will be difficult.

Happiness must be unconditional, you must let go and accept what is no matter how bad it may seem.

Our lives are bigger than it seems, there is much more to your consciousness than this mere body you're in now. Your existence transcends this experience.

None of these people know what they do. That's why we cannot blame them. We just need to let go and move on in order to free ourselves from this nightmare.

I don't blame myself or anyone else. I can let go, I don't need these problems. I'm here to enjoy life.

originally posted by: muzzleflash
a reply to: dfnj2015

Yes it's human nature to lean towards dogma and doctrine but it's a crutch we don't need. It's become a chain that binds the Soul into suffering.

Maybe it is something YOU don’t need, but others may benefit from their beliefs. You don’t get to tell others the value of something that helps them.

I'm guilty of it, we all are. We live and learn (hopefully). When I look back at myself 10 years ago, I don't even know who that person was, I'm a big believer in self reflection, and I'm honest with myself! I'm constantly critical of myself and my Behaviour, because I'm responsible for me, and if I criticize others for anything I sure as hell need to be honest with myself and be upfront about my own problems and things I need to work on or say.

Mistakes are inevitable, it's acknowledging them and what you do after them that's important!

originally posted by: Metallicus

originally posted by: muzzleflash
a reply to: dfnj2015

Yes it's human nature to lean towards dogma and doctrine but it's a crutch we don't need. It's become a chain that binds the Soul into suffering.

Maybe it is something YOU don’t need, but others may benefit from their beliefs. You don’t get to tell others the value of something that helps them.

Excellent answer ! 👍🏼

originally posted by: Metallicus

originally posted by: muzzleflash
a reply to: dfnj2015

Yes it's human nature to lean towards dogma and doctrine but it's a crutch we don't need. It's become a chain that binds the Soul into suffering.

Maybe it is something YOU don’t need, but others may benefit from their beliefs. You don’t get to tell others the value of something that helps them.

I meant the pejorative sense of dogma not the positive sense as applied to philosophical doctrine etc.

So I agree Metallicus, completely! No one should be codifying their bs and forcing anyone to agree against their will.

I apologize for not realizing you can't see my sarcasm and facial expressions/voice tone/gestures. Haha I keep forgetting language can be read many ways and I'm writing as if people can see my sarcasm.

Here's how wiki separates both senses of the terminology:

Dogma is an official system of principles or doctrines of a religion, such as Roman Catholicism,[1] or the positions of a philosopher or of a philosophical school such as Stoicism.

In the pejorative sense, dogma refers to enforced decisions, such as those of aggressive political interests or authorities.[2][3] More generally, it is applied to some strong belief whose adherents are not willing to discuss rationally. This attitude is named as a dogmatic one, or as dogmatism; and is often used to refer to matters related to religion, but is not limited to theistic attitudes alone and is often used with respect to political or philosophical dogmas.

Hmmm that book looks interesting, I haven't run across it yet.

Ive got a copy of Jung's "The Undiscovered Self" right now which is kind of odd.

I'll look for a copy of that book. I live with like 15 musicians in a really crazy house (everyone is super cool and open minded yet skeptical and really respectful if anyone disagrees) so some of them would check it out too. They're beyond awesome. I'm so thankful.

Oh yeah and thanks for the links. I appreciate you.

a reply to: dfnj2015

Sorry my post above is to you. It isn't tagging you as a reply correctly. I must have pressed the wrong button. Thx again.

a reply to: valiant

In a lot of ways because of our culture and vanity and how everyone judges each other so critically it can be difficult to avoid becoming the essence of arrogance itself all over again.

All ideas in our brain are Electromagnetic (Light) waves, with positive and negative polarity.

It works both ways, for example we say "you need to have a long look in the mirror" to mean one ought to reflect upon their mistakes, grow, and humble themselves.

But taken literally, that's not the right thing to tell a narcissist. She/He will find only vanity in a mirror. And of course he/she already literally looks at themselves in the mirror hours every day, and takes tons of selfies, etc.

I'm sorry I drank a lot of coffee tonight I'm off a bit, distracted by commotion, and my energy level is high so I wanted to commit to posting.

Point is, all ideas (waves of energy) form polarity naturally in terms of the above context. There's always multiple ways to interpret something.

a reply to: muzzleflash

In a lot of ways because of our culture and vanity and how everyone judges each other so critically it can be difficult to avoid becoming the essence of arrogance itself all over again.

hmmm.. 🤔.. do you think you may have self defensive actions and arrogance confused ? The people I know that have been especially critically judged either retreat in a hermit like existence as self defence to avoid more criticism and hurt or maybe lash out in anger at times because they’ve had enough. I’ve been guilty of being overly critical at times ( which is wrong )..and it seemed to cause a lot of anger.. that just festered with some who were upset that I was critical. Some of these angry people had huge egos and yes their arrogance shone through, but I hardly think it had anything to do with the criticism. I think the anger had everything to do more with bruised egos and trying to look heroic in coming to someone’s rescue, who had a bruised ego.

I honestly think some people are arrogant because it makes them feel they are better than others ,and they get off on that way of thinking and how it makes them feel.

That’s my take on it for now.. I’m always growing and searching for truth.. maybe I will think differently at some point.🤷🏻‍♀️

Now where is that ‘mirror’ .. no.. not the one for selfies (never been a big selfie person).. way past my days of vanity😏.

a reply to: muzzleflash

In a lot of ways because of our culture and vanity and how everyone judges each other so critically it can be difficult to avoid becoming the essence of arrogance itself all over again.

Once again I think I earlier missed the mark on what you were saying in this paragraph.

I agree that in a culture where everyone is constantly critical of each other, and often unfairly judge each other, it could be easier to hide ones heart behind a wall of arrogance as protection.(Is that a little closer to what you meant ? )

I guess one could say there are different reasons arrogance creeps into a persons life.. then again maybe it’s just part of the human psyche since being a child...and some just have it more than others , like a bad temper.🤷🏻‍♀️

a reply to: Sheye

Yes that's what I meant. When everyone around you acts arrogant and selfish, it's easy to become arrogant in response. It's the path of least resistance.

The difficult path is to let go and get over it, and to continue being you without letting it corrupt your thinking.

I know how cruel some people can be, so I know how hard it is to forgive and move forward. It's an every day battle as the old feelings and thoughts resurface and have to be dealt with all over again.

One of the best ways I get over all this life drama stuff is just to remember they are self-destructive and that the only way they'll see the light is when they find themselves in darkness one day.

From experience I noticed that most ppl collapse under their own egos and just get worse and worse rather than learning better.

Actually admitting you aren't perfect and need to work on these things is the first step to improvement. Keeping at it daily, hourly, is the hard part.

Change is possible though. I don't even experience hate or anger barely anymore. Maybe 3 or 4 times I got actually pissed off in the last 2 years. Sounds impossible but it's all a choice in our minds.

Those few times I got upset I handled it and defused it within the hour it occurred. I had to rationalize things to the degree I became neutral and realized they were only hurting themselves and that I can overcome their bs mental problems by stepping back, breathing, and getting a grip on my own melodramatic feelings and thoughts.

I definitely don't have a great life either, in fact my life's a disaster and every time I get on my feet something else sweeps them out from under me.

I've got some very serious problems, no money, court cases, starvation frostbite and homelessness, no govt assist, a broken spine, I lost almost all hope.

But getting angry won't solve any of those problems. It only makes it harder on me to think straight and being pissed ruins my day. I just can't handle the additional burdens of negative emotions or ideas. I already learned my lesson and don't need new disasters to pile up on what I already cannot handle.

a reply to: muzzleflash

Your posts really are full of wisdom from real life experience, muzzleflash and I must say they help me process my own baggage in a much more honest and realistic way.

We’re all human after all, and people deal differently with their life issues. Important to try and deal with them though , because hurt can fester into bitterness, which can lead to even darker emotions.

Makes one wonder what happened to those souls constantly looking for destruction and making evil plans.

I’m sorry you are going through such hardships at the moment muzzleflash.. I wish I could do more to help you than merely offer you words of encouragement. Life can be very difficult at times, especially when going through such things as you mentioned. You will be in my prayers ..concerning your needs and well being.

Once again thank you for another great post with honesty and insight ,into what has made you become the person you are today.

a reply to: Sheye

I used to argue with and challenge people all the time.

But in the last few years I've decreased my argumentative disposition by like 99% less than it was.

I almost always refrain from saying anything at all. If I don't like their opinions I avoid them or change the subject. I don't really care how wrong we all are anymore. I know my truth and I remain skeptical of everything beyond that.

People say dumb #'d up stuff all the time. Who cares ya know? It's not worth tainting my mind and soul with negativity and harsh feelings. Usually it's irrelevant and not even worth challenging them.

I'm not being passive per se, but rather I'm making strategic choices to maintain my neutrality.

For example, my Xwife is with some other guy and yet I hang out with them every weekend and we are friends. I told her how sorry I was for my mistakes and forgave her for hers, and now we're actual friends again.

Most men would be upset or feel insulted or threatened, but I finally saw the light. I discovered I can be a loving, forgiving, caring great friend to everyone including my enemies.

That woman will do anything in her power for me despite that our relationship was horrible, because she knows I hold nothing against her. She's free to be her true self with zero judgement or criticism from me. I support her in everything because I'm a real friend and care.

For too long I believed life was about power and control, about criticizing everyone and everything. My heart was full of anger and even hate.

But then I realized, I cannot control anyone except myself. Power and control are illusions and technically impossible. In fact desiring it makes everyone hate you too for being such a jerk.

I used to always believe I needed others to support and praise me, that I needed their acceptance to be ok within myself. I was domineering, extroverted, and relentless.

But now I am totally free flowing, mostly introverted about anything personal like my feelings, and I get over bs and try to move forward.

The house I live at now with all the musicians? I haven't argued with any of them once over anything! We can talk about any topic, even politics and end up laughing and having a good time because I don't force anyone to agree. Hardly anyone agrees on politics but we can all be friends and not care about conformity of belief.

Not one person here has said one hurtful thing to me in the last 2 months! First time that ever happened actually. With this many ppl? Yeah it's weird, almost magical.

Only one person I know truly hates me and wants to put me in prison for years because I'm ME. I even forgave them and pretty much don't care.

What would being angry do for me? Make it worse! Nothing good can come from it.

The only good that will ever come is that which I create in myself and offer to others.

a reply to: Sheye

Thank you for making such an important thread topic and allowing me to share my experiences and ideas.

It's rare on ATS to discuss things that actually matter for our lives as much as something like this.

I just wish more people were aware of how vital it is to examine themselves honestly.