I helped a friend / family member "cross over" last night

A long time dear friend and cousin of my ex husband hung himself last night.
I haven't spoke to him in 10 years. When I divorced his cousin, we just lost
touch.

I received a call he died by hanging himself yesterday. In my dream, he came to me
and we were in a park setting. I was over joyed to see him. We were talking
telepathically. I was tasked to tell him or help him understand he died. I told him
that he was dead. He was shocked. He said (in my head) he didn't think he
would actually die. He thought he would botch his suicide somehow.
He was trying to take it in that he was dead.

There was a long table of food with everyone's favorite dishes. I asked why the
food as they don't eat. I was told in my head, it's more symbolic to make him
(and newly departed) feel comfortable and normal.

About 50 family members were waiting for him. He was hesitant to go to them.

I asked him why he killed himself? He said his air conditioning / heating contractor
license was revoked and he had a few DUIs. He said he couldn't support himself.
He saw no other way out. I told him to go to his family. He was younger looking, around
28 or 32 years old (he was 52 yrs old). He went to his waiting family. That is
when I woke up. It was 5 am PST.

I looked up his air conditioning license immediately
when I woke up, and his air cond license WAS REVOKED!
I then looked up to see if he had DUIs and he had two!!!

My (grown) daughter called and said he actually
died this morning at 5 am PST! That is the same
time I encouraged him to go be with his deceased
family. Apparently, he was in intensive care all night
after hanging himself, but didn't officially die until 5 am today!

I've never had a dream where I helped someone
cross over! I feel at peace knowing he is truly in Heaven!
I also feel honored to be asked to help and witness
something so awe inspiring!

Good to hear he was going into helping hands.

My father has told me for years that when his aunt died, she visited him in dream and said goodbye. He was woken by the phone, it was my grandfather telling him she had passed 30 minutes earlier. He didn't even know she was sick so the whole thing came as a shock. Proof of the afterlife? I guess the best we can muster through self experience. My father is very straight and narrow, a 30 year police officer. He only speaks about it after drinking a few. I believe my father as he has no reason to lie.

Be glad you had the experience, and sorry for your loss.

reply to post by curiouswa


S/F for sharing your experience.


Thank you for posting your experience as it helps me in ways I cannot explain logically or rationally

reply to post by curiouswa


Very compelling story, thanks for sharing.

I had a situation where my favorite grandmother, whom I was very close to was on her death bed. My mother called from her bedside (I had not seen her in a few years since she developed Alzheimer's due to wanting to remember her as she was).

My mother was crying and between sobs told me that she was about to go and felt she should call me. I immediately told my mother to hold the phone up to my Nanny's ear (that's what i called her). I said to her, I love you Nanny, its time for you to go....have a good trip, I will see you again soon.

She died.

That night, I had a very vivid dream. I was wading through a crowd of people on a sunny hillside...( I got the impression it was Hawaii) and I new that I would see my Nanny in the crowd somewhere, and I came to a large picnic table and she was in her 20's in 1940's/50's garb chatting away with all the people (she was very much a social bug). As soon as I got in sight of her she look right at me with a knowing smile and gave me a mischievous wink and went back to chatting with the folks crowded around her.

I knew she was ok, and I think she was acknowledging the final words I spoke to her before death.

reply to post by curiouswa


Awesome story and thanks for sharing! I was able to easily relate to your story and can sense the genuiness of it. I don't have a similar story to share although I know some people who have passed and even a couple who took there own lives.

The way you relate the persons passing, i.e. "I thought I would botch it" is very revealing.....I can absolutely imagine someone who feels they have nothing to live for think that way just before death.

Would you say he seemed at peace with his death? Very curious to know.....So he didn't immediately realize he was dead but was accepting of you telling him? Can you elaborate a little on that? Really paint the picutre...please!

reply to post by masta12d


He was really shocked at first that he was dead. He was silent, taking it all in.
Apparently, he was drinking when he hung himself. His family did an intervention and
wanted him in treatment. He asked to go out on the front porch of the house (before
he died) and was very distraught. I got the feeling he thought someone would find
him before he died. He conveyed to me he had no idea how to really hang himself.
It was basically him winging it. When I came to him in the after life, and told him he
was dead, he was shocked. I tried to communicate (mentally) it was okay and it
would be fun. He was solemn. He couldn't believe he succeeded and was dead.
I was gentle and gave him time to process. I told him his family was waiting
and it woke be fun and happy. They were not crisp in their forms, kind of like
I was looking at a group of people to far to make them out without glasses on.
I told him to get food and join them. He was feeling the texture of the food with
his hands. He was taking it all in. He then started walking towards them and I woke up.

I'm actually really tired today and I'm not usually tired, but high energy. It's left
a big impact on me all day.

reply to post by curiouswa


Oh it would leave one helluva mark on me also that's for sure. Tragic really, sounds like he was simply crying for help and it went unheard. That is actually quite common with families, as you said, they just tried to intervine which not to point fingers, could have been the straw the broke his back.

People think that getting together as a group and calling out someones faults and failures is a good tool to get them back on track. Really?!?! I suppose it could help some people, but you have ego's and pride to contend with. If I had a group of people telling me hey, your an awesome guy and so much going for you, but your current decisions are making you a failure.

"Oh geez, I didn't realize, thank you for making me feel like a total piece of #" .......

Even if they had the best interest at heart, the truth is (IMO or in my eyes), those who wanted to help came with an agenda. They knew what they wanted to say and what to do to hopefully motivate this individual. Makes me wonder if there was anyone there actually looking and listening to clues to how he really felt. To be responsive and reactive to "his" needs, instead of trying to fulfill their own needs.

I know I am making assumptions which therefore makes me an ass, but that's not my intent, just want to call out that people need to be mindful of these types of actions, that's all. Perhaps he would have done what he did regardless of what was said to him by whom and how many. Who knows...Still very, very, tragic.

I know someone who hung themselves also. He had a good career, nice home, etc. I was dating his step-daughter. He gave up on life after his wife left him which was something he couldn't reconcile and was compounded by his son overdosing 3 years before and also leaving this earth. All he wanted to do was be with his son....sad, so very sad. He went down the basement and wrapped himself in an american flag, tied a noose around his neck and the rest is history.

I hope I didn't offend you from my above comments. Just my opinion mind you.

reply to post by masta12d


Not offended at all. What I know is be built his own house, was debt free for a number of years. Married this lady
who ended up being partly his demise. She liked to drink. He was so looking forward to being married after being single for 38 years. He wasn't the type to divorce quickly. He ended up becoming addicted to alcohol in a big way and would have beers and be "on call" for his heating and A/C business. He then got into debt and sold his house less than 2 years ago. He was too tired to start over and was distraught at losing his wife, business, home he built and life. He had to move in with family and it went down hill from there. I don't know that side of the family, never met any of them. I wish he would of moved in with his brother in Calif as I think his brother would of been much better support to helping to give him back self esteem.

reply to post by curiouswa


yeah its amazing how one decision can have such a prfound impact.

It try not to think about it much as it does leave me feeling a little guilty but not even a year ago I was looking to cut cost. I put an add in the paper for a room mate, found someone and he quickly moved in. He was an older gentleman, likely in his 50's. I myself am early 30's.

He seemed very antsy but seemed very humble and very nice. Over the first 2 weeks I barely saw him, I think he was trying to get comfortable with a stranger so spent most of his time at his daughters (who lived nearby). We didn't talk much but one day about 3 weeks in faith was brought up. I shared my insights and thoughts and I could tell what I was saying seemed to rattle him. But with most highly religious people, I figured he'd just blow me off and continue with his beliefs. That was the last day I saw him.

After the 1st of the month came and gone I assumed he moved back to South Carolina or something because I never got 2nd month rent nor was he anywhere to be found. A week or so later I go through the stuff he left to get an idea of who he is and where he went. In his duffle bag was a trove of letters written to him while he was in prison. Although I probably shouldn't have, I read his letters and determined he was in prison for drug use. Additionaly there were needles in his bag as well as insulin needles but no drugs. Most letters was his ex-wife, that although didn't want to get back with him, clearly wanted to help him for the sake of their kids.

Anyways......about a month later I get a knock on the door by 3 ladies one generation after the next, young adult, mid aged and senior. The lady introduces me as the wide of...and advises that he took his own life about a month ago and they are here for his things...

Clearly this man was struggling to come to grips with his reality but I can't help but wonder, did I push him over? Oh I hope not.

At the very least I hope he finds the happiness he couldn't get here in this life. May he rest in peace as well as your friend.

Stay Sacred.

reply to post by curiouswa


S n F

I know this is a hard time for you, and I'm sorry for your loss; but could you please give more details. You mention you communicated "telepathically" So like what type of telepathy? Did you all use your voices, please be specific on how communication happened. Also what was the environment/setting like? What did you see? Smell? Hear? Feel,Did you know you were dreaming, or did you only realize when you awoke? What did the realm feel like?


Who/what told you how did you know " I was tasked to tell him or help him understand he died."

You say you feel drained, please elaborate. Also I do not mean to sound insensitive,offensive, but what makes you believe the place he is in is Heaven? I am by no means doubting the incident, I just want all the information I can get, regarding this event. Thanks for your time.

reply to post by HumanitiesLastHope


S n F

I know this is a hard time for you, and I'm sorry for your loss; but could you please give more details. You mention you communicated "telepathically" So like what type of telepathy? Did you all use your voices, please be specific on how communication happened.

It was exactly like when you think, except there are thoughts and the thoughts sound like the persons voice. Think of someone you know hard and think of how they talk or laugh. That is how it is. Thoughts, but mine and those of whoever in the afterlife would inject thoughts as if we were talking with our mouth, but we weren't. It was natural. I wasn't even thinking weird thoughts about how all of a sudden I was talking in my head. It was as if I've done it before.

Also what was the environment/setting like? What did you see? Smell? Hear? Feel,Did you know you were dreaming, or did you only realize when you awoke? What did the realm feel like?

It was a park like setting with grass and trees. I didn't smell anything that I remember. I felt natural, I wasn't shocked. I don't think it was actually "heaven", but this is how you start to go to Heaven. I knew he was crossing over to the other side. It was like helping someone go to a hospital for a life saving operation, knowing they will be better off if they go.


Who/what told you how did you know " I was tasked to tell him or help him understand he died." The thought entered my head. It was like waking up in the morning for work knowing what you need to do for the day. I just knew and I knew there was no fighting or questioning it. He had to go and I had to help him.

You say you feel drained, please elaborate. I feel like I was up all night long. I'm super tired, but really tripping out I had this experience. I keep thinking and thinking wondering if I missed anything. I'm going over it time and time again in my head.

Also I do not mean to sound insensitive,offensive, but what makes you believe the place he is in is Heaven? I am by no means doubting the incident, I just want all the information I can get, regarding this event.

It wasn't really the Heaven we think of, it was an in-between a journey or exit from this life to the other. I guess that is why he was there, vs. other stories you/me might hear of as he was lingering all night long between life and death. When he finally accepted he died and started walking to his family, that is when he must of died as the time matches when I woke up. I instantly texted my (grown) kids to tell them of this experience. It's really incredible. I don't know if it was different maybe due to him killing himself or what?

reply to post by curiouswa


Some people may not believe what happened to you....but I know many do believe it...I am one of those people that believes. You talked him into going into the light of Heaven where there is love, family and healing.

About him looking younger...I have been told...that when people pass away...and arrive in Heaven...everyone looks to be 30 years old. I have been told this by various different people who don't know each other; but whom I have met along my way in life.

Thanks for sharing. It shows that there is a different level of communication. The only one I have had regarding death is about my father inlaw. He wasn't well. He had cancer and other health problems from diabetes. I had a dream of him getting up from the kitchen table then collapsing then two years later that is what happened.I wrote it all down even a month it was suppose to happen. I was off by a three weeks. I didnt know if it was going to be 1 or 2 years after the dream. A week or so after he died I was in the passenger seat of our car and I felt someone touch my shoulder( whole hand on it).It made my head turn really quick to look in the rear seat.Nobody was in the back seats ,it was just my wife and I in the car. An afterlife who knows. I guess you wont know until you are on the other side.

Originally posted by curiouswa
reply to post by HumanitiesLastHope

 

It was a park like setting with grass and trees. I didn't smell anything that I remember. I felt natural, I wasn't shocked.

Funny you should refer to it as a park ...

Review of Focus Level 27

I'm actually really tired today and I'm not usually tired, but high energy. It's left
a big impact on me all day.

I think I know precisely why you are feeling so tired. If you get around to trying the lucid dream / OBE techniques described in this howto. I am pretty sure you'll feel exactly the same thing once you wake up. It's extremely draining. In fact, it can completely ruin the rest of the day. If you are willing to give it a shot. I would be curious to hear you describe how similar or dissimilar it is to what you are feeling now. Just make sure you do it on a day when you don't have anything important to do.

reply to post by curiouswa


Amazing dream and I believe he did come to you for help. A lot of hard to answer dreams and paranormal things happen when people who are close to us pass over. I know I've experienced them myself. Call it coincidence, but unless you're on the receiving end and you can't find answers for it, you know in your heart it's for real.

It's sad that people kill themselves over things that are not hard to overcome. Where is the human fighting spirit we once had? There are people like Nick Vujicic with no arms and legs living a full life and yet a guy commits suicide over a revoked license.... Maybe he was no good at what he did I do not know, but as sad as this is, it was a cop out.

I have no respect for people who are too weak to face the small things in life when you look at people like Nick Vujicic. I'm sorry, that's just the way it is.

Suicide is a cop out, and taking your life, if you believe in a God, does not send you to heaven. If you don't believe in God, then the person committing suicide is still a wimp when you compare their life to someone like Nick Vujicic.

Regardless suicide reveals selfishness, cheapness, and weakness on all levels and that is even before the impact on those left behind.

reply to post by curiouswa

Dear curiouswa - I'm a new member (haven't written an Intro yet, working on it), but wanted to tell you that your story touched my heart. I'm so sorry for your loss. But happy that you were able to help him. You've certainly painted a beautiful picture of the next phase of "life." I was wondering if you sensed the presence of God? Or, if you don't believe in God, did you sense any other "higher" presence at all? Did your friend believe in God or some other higher being? I ask not only because I'm curious, but because the table of food you mentioned reminds me of the wedding feast of the Lamb. Just a thought.

On a side note, to help you recover, consider taking Emergen-C. I find it helps restore energy very quickly and it tastes pretty good, too.

Thanks much for sharing.

I think maybe you had an out of body experience in order to help him. Robert Monroe always talked about 'The Park' and visiting this place during his out of body experiences. He eventually came to where he was regularly helping people cross over, and that 'the park' was a waystation for people after they have died, a comfortable place to come to the realization that they have died.

The Park was also a meeting place in the Matrix

Originally posted by MadMax7
It's sad that people kill themselves over things that are not hard to overcome. Where is the human fighting spirit we once had? There are people like Nick Vujicic with no arms and legs living a full life and yet a guy commits suicide over a revoked license.... Maybe he was no good at what he did I do not know, but as sad as this is, it was a cop out.

I have no respect for people who are too weak to face the small things in life when you look at people like Nick Vujicic. I'm sorry, that's just the way it is.

Suicide is a cop out, and taking your life, if you believe in a God, does not send you to heaven. If you don't believe in God, then the person committing suicide is still a wimp when you compare their life to someone like Nick Vujicic.

Regardless suicide reveals selfishness, cheapness, and weakness on all levels and that is even before the impact on those left behind.

edit on 1-5-2013 by MadMax7 because: (no reason given)

I wonder if it's possible that some people who have committed suicide have led a debilitated life for years and years, which was much harder than you acknowledge. Everyone's situation is unique -- it's wrong to be so assuming.

I wonder if it's possible that many of the people you are calling weak have gone through harder things than you can even imagine (I say imagine over empathize because you're clearly not doing the latter).

What do you think?