"How many of you got your asses whipped and what was the philosophy of your household?"

Originally posted by InTheLight
Not only did parents use corporal punishment back in the day, but so did the teachers and principals at schools. Who got wacked at school?

I did a couple times.

Originally posted by NOTurTypical

Originally posted by InTheLight
Not only did parents use corporal punishment back in the day, but so did the teachers and principals at schools. Who got wacked at school?

I did a couple times.

Me too, not often though, but the punishment at school was much more severe than at home.

I got the belt, wooden spoon, flip flop, hangar, whatever was in reach at the time, and I deserved EVERY beating i got, i was a bad kid lol

Originally posted by HomerinNC
I got the belt, wooden spoon, flip flop, hangar, whatever was in reach at the time, and I deserved EVERY beating i got, i was a bad kid lol

I hear ya

My mom got me once with the yard sprinkler, of all things! I mean, who beats their kid with the yard sprinkler, lol. She was fond of the wooden spoon, as well. But, yeah... whatever object was within her reach was fair game. And I'm sure I did something to set her off.

There was some spanking in our household. My parents had a paddle and would sometimes use a spatula. They stopped around the time I was four. I'm not sure if it coincides with the time my mom dragged me to my room by the arm and threw me on the floor bloodying my nose. I think that may have freaked her out and caused my parents to re-evaluate their parenting choices, but I'm not sure. However, I can't recall being spanked after age four.

The philosophy in my household I would say was confused. My dad ascribed to the teachings of the Urantia Book, but he was raised Southern Baptist. My mom was nominally Christian (her views on christianity were hot one day and cold the next, very confusing for me as a child), but she was raised RLDS and later went to a Baptist church as a teen. We didn't attend church at all. My mom is the only one I ever remember spanking us, though.

The philosophy, I guess, was Spare the Rod, Spoil the Child. Which means that if you don't whip the # out of your kids with a rod of some sort, then you will spoil them and they will grow up to be disrespectful little #s. At least,that's how I understand it to work.

Actually I was spanked or hit with a spatula, wooden spoon, hands, etc., very little. And when it did happen, it didn't really hurt that bad... I believe it was just the fact my parent or parents were so upset that they felt they needed to physically inflict pain in order to make a serious enough impact that had the most effect, that, and the fear... The fear of getting swatted was always much worse than the actual pain from getting spanked on the butt. I was never hit in the face.

I think if you do it rarely and you don't inflict real bad pain, then it can be a good thing. If you spank them properly and for the proper reasons, then just the threat of spanking can be enough. Well, actually, spanking or threatening to spank is never enough... you need to actually EXPLAIN #... Yes, kids are pretty smart and they know when they've done something bad or that will anger you...but they don't always fully understand WHY they shouldn't do certain things. I often felt that my parents did not explain why, because they weren't smart enough to fully explain things to my satisfaction. So they would pull put the "because I said so" card.

In reality "because I said so" is never a reason for anything. It's just the lazy way of saying "look, I know its my responsibility to raise you and teach you about the ways of the world and how things work, what do do/not to do and why, buuuuut.... I'm just too lazy and or dumb so I'm simply going to exert my authority just to get what I want and if you grow up not having a clue about a damn thing other than what you yourself have learned through trial and error, then oh well. I realize that one day I may depend on you and so of course it would behoove me to do my best to ensure your success in the world, but let's face it, I'm a r of crap who never should be involved in the development or safety of children and I honestly never wanted you, you were an accident"

I believe it was just the fact my parent or parents were so upset that they felt they needed to physically inflict pain in order to make a serious enough impact that had the most effect, that, and the fear...

They could just as easily, thrust their fist through a wall instead of through a child.

Originally posted by strings0305
When I did something wrong, starting at age four, my father would have me read a piece of writing relevant to whatever I had done and write a response, of any length sufficient to explain why I did what I did and if it was "good" or "bad."

I don't mean to make light of the topic, but this comment bowled me over.

I'm pretty sure (nay - positive) that if I gave my daughter the choice of getting a smack on the butt vs. reading an article relevant to her behavior followed by making her write an essay about how she was wrong - she would absolutely choose the spanking.

In fact, I think I would too.

I feel for you.

I was raised in a strict manner and i'm thankful for that. Spiritually speaking, we are all rather diverse and traditionally heretikal. ;-)

My household was unique. My mom 's Jehovah's Witness and my dad's an Evolutionist. Mom was Southern Baptist and dad was Episcopalian when they got married. Mom spanked me, and dad wouldn't allow it, because he viewed it as religious punishment, and that wasn't going to be done under his roof. Well, when dad finally really started enforcing the no spanking rule, I figured it out. Three months later, he rescinded the no spanking rule. He saw the difference in my behavior. He also realized why my mom took so long to spank me. She never did it in anger. She waited till she calmed down. And she made sure I knew why I was getting the spanking before she gave it to me.

In regards to the school, I went to school in a gang-infested neighborhood. Some of my classmates were already killers by the time they were in 4th grade. But, we got our butts beat in school. When I hit Jr. High, the spankings were eliminated. I saw a difference. It only took a few years. It went from kids not being willing to admit they cursed, or when caught fighting, instantly put their arms around each other and said they were just playing, to having to visit a 3rd grade class where my mom was a teacher's aide, and threaten a kid that threatened to shoot her. I don't think that was a coincidence.

reply to post by strings0305


"We smack dogs to train them. I fully expect more of people. "



You hit your dog?????


seriously though, I am sure there are some extremely effective ways to discipline children OTHER than spanking. However, not all parents have access or have knowledge of the alternative methods. I know I did not, and I read books on parenting, yet still my gut reaction as a single mother with three children working 40+ hours a week was old fashioned spankings. It's effective, because a human being we have the ability to reason and to understand that actions have consequences. If a child is never taught that, and again... I believe a sharp sting to the bottom is an effective way to teach this at a very young age, they will have to grow up and learn this as an adult. The consequences are much more painful and damaging at that point in life than any "spanking" will ever be.

ETA: I seriously would NEVER hit my dog though, they just couldn't possible understand WTH I was doing it for, IMHO.... a pet (Dogs in particular) respond to the tone of your voice, so I scold mine and she KNOWS believe me... she's done something wrong. She tends to do it anyway however

I was raised without any religion, other than the times I attended church with friends.
I've had ONE spanking by my father with a belt when I was very young, and to say the least he never had to spank me again for the rest of my young years. I always respected him and it wasn't just out of fear, even though I did fear him spanking me again. He was very loving and spent a lot of time with me, so I respected him. Out of respect for my father and more of a fear of disappointing him, I chose to do my best to stay out of trouble. I did not however. I was rebellious and did not always behave, but this was only because there just wasn't anyone around to keep an eye on me, I had a little too much freedom to do things I shouldn't have been.

My mother & father divorced when I was 10 and she absolutely stopped being around by the time myself and my brothers were 12 or so. She NEVER disciplined us. Other than a few bouts of verbal abuse out of rage and I didn't respect that. When she said NO, to me that meant I had a long hard battle ahead, but I would definitely still be able to get what I wanted...one way or the other. She often times would completely lose her temper with us and act out in anger which always ended up in some completely inappropriate action. Nevertheless, she did her best I suppose, she was a single mother and often times had to work 2 jobs. I do not think that is an excuse for not being around, because I believe we could have gotten by with less and she most certainly had things I never had as a single mother.

As a young single mother of 3 very small children, I began to raise them on my own and made my decisions about discipline based on my own life experience. I am a Christian, with a strong faith in God and raised my children to believe the same. I felt this was the most important thing for them, to help them to understand the world they would live in. This generation IMHO need to be educated about good and evil and what these end times are going to bring to the table.

I spanked hands when they were small and were getting into things that would hurt them, I spanked little legs (just enough) when they began to rebel against my authority and would not do what they were told. Then when they were a little older I got a paddle. I had a constant awareness and fear of DCS or someone else accusing me of abusing my children because I spanked. So, each school year when they brought home all the paperwork, I found the slip I had to sign that said whether or not it was okay for them to be paddled. I always signed yes, and then marked "please call me first", even though I expected them to behave when I wasn't around, I always wanted to be the final word in my child's discipline. I always figured if the "school" thought paddling was okay, then I would be safe to do the same.

I always kept the paddle put up, because it can become extremely frustrating to raise three children alone along with all the other pressures in life...work, bills, etc. I always wanted to make sure that whenever I did have to administer the "licks" with the paddle, that it wasn't out of anger. Having to go get the paddle assured me I had time to cool off a bit...and they had to go to their room and wait on me, which gave them a chance to "think about what they did". I rarely had to use that paddle, and when I did we talked about it, but they always knew it was there and they would have consequences for their actions. I loved them with every ounce of my being, and they KNEW this and also understood that I was administering justice because I loved them and wanted them to learn self discipline, control, respect and to follow rules. I allowed my kids to express themselves, and we talked about anything openly. (I did not have that growing up, and it was needed)

I refused to work more than one job, I made sure I was home every night...took all my vacation time when they were out of school and we sat down and ate dinner and talked each evening when work and school were done. I had to sacrifice a lot to make ends meet, they did without a lot because we simply didn't have extra $$. They did play sports and had all the things they NEEDED. This was the single most important thing I did raising my children. They learned to play outside ALL day, they appreciated Friday nights when I actually went through a drive-thru and allowed them to order anything they wanted (from the $1 menu ha ha) and we spent $5 bucks renting one dollar movies and had "family time" for hours together.

My oldest son watched out for the other 2, which was a huge help to me. He played with them and they "created" games because they didn't have cable TV or computers. They shared 1 video game, and did NOT get to play anything that had an "M" rating, or that was violent. They have the tightest bond I've ever seen, and thank me all the time for not spoiling them. They turned out great, not perfect but well adjusted and Happy I don't fear them or worry they will be on CNN