Off Topic: Question of the Day II: Are Girls People?

So I was getting on the case of my room-mate for being controlling of his girlfriend, and he told me "Baker, why don't you do things the way you want to do and I'll do things the way I want to?"

I don't understand why his same logic doesn't apply to females... I thought they were people, too. Could just be my opinion.

Originally posted by darkbake
So I was getting on the case of my room-mate for being controlling of his girlfriend, and he told me "Baker, why don't you do things the way you want to do and I'll do things the way I want to?"

I don't understand why his same logic doesn't apply to females... I thought they were people, too. Could just be my opinion.

edit on 18-1-2013 by darkbake because: (no reason given)

edit on 18-1-2013 by darkbake because: (no reason given)

Maybe you should keep your nose out of his business? How he conducts his relationship with his significant other is his business, not yours whatsoever.
Do you have feelings for this girl or something?

If I were him I would find it rather odd that you even had a discussion with him about his relationship with his gf.
-Maybe he is chauvinistic? Which I indeed understand.
and hell, if his gf is taking his #, then it must not bother her that much.

Mind your own business man.

IMO he's right, what business is it of your's to poke your nose where it isn't wanted.

If things are that bad with him being a control freak than it's his girlfriends job to put him in place or leave his arse.

If things take a step for the worse like he physically abuses her than you might want to step in.

just my 2c

reply to post by darkbake


Nope, they are from Venus, remember.

Well, as a woman, thanks for stepping in and saying something.

It may or may not do any good, but at least you tried. There is such a thing as mental abuse, as well as physical.
And if it does ever get physical, please step in again.

Obviously somebody raised you right.

Originally posted by darkbake
So I was getting on the case of my room-mate for being controlling of his girlfriend, and he told me "Baker, why don't you do things the way you want to do and I'll do things the way I want to?"

I don't understand why his same logic doesn't apply to females... I thought they were people, too. Could just be my opinion.

edit on 18-1-2013 by darkbake because: (no reason given)

edit on 18-1-2013 by darkbake because: (no reason given)

You may have took his comment out of context. In fact I think he way be telling you to back off a little.

There's normally only 2 people involved in a relationship. . .

Originally posted by chiefsmom
Well, as a woman, thanks for stepping in and saying something.

It may or may not do any good, but at least you tried. There is such a thing as mental abuse, as well as physical.
And if it does ever get physical, please step in again.

Obviously somebody raised you right.

my goodness... really?
Don't you think the woman herself should SAY SOMETHING for herself instead!?!?

to me, it seems as if the OP has feelings for this lady... which is probably why he even said anything.

reply to post by resoe26


Maybe she should. But there are many women out there that have been raised to think it is ok to be mentally, verbally and physically abused by men, so they won't.

Of course women are people. People that can make their own decisions about how their relationship works.

I get a lot of crap from other women about my relationship with my husband. They think they're helping me by trying to force me into these masculine pants that I would rather not wear. They ignore the fact that that respecting your husband has been an honorable thing to do up until very recent historical events. I get looked down on for being a stay at home mom. I get looked down on for understanding that I have my own equally important role in my marriage. Hell, I've even been ridiculed just for getting up to grab my husband a beer!

Very rarely my husband will make a decision affecting myself or our family that I don't agree with, but it always turns out to be for the best. I wouldn't have married him if I didn't expect him to be capable of filling a husbands shoes. Women often make decisions based on emotions. That's not sexist, it's just the way we're wired. Men are wired to be more effective leaders. I don't believe my beliefs make any other woman better than me. I'm just choosing to go the route that has been proven to work for thousands of years. Divorce and fatherless children are a recent development. I think there is a reason for that.

I don't know how this girl is being treated, but ultimately it's her choice. Sometimes you think you're helping, but you're really not.

Originally posted by chiefsmom
reply to post by resoe26

 

Maybe she should. But there are many women out there that have been raised to think it is ok to be mentally, verbally and physically abused by men, so they won't.

Yeah, I guess you're right on that. Although that would still be up to the woman to display her own feelings on the matter. Nobody elses business.

Originally posted by Ireminisce
Of course women are people. People that can make their own decisions about how their relationship works.

I get a lot of crap from other women about my relationship with my husband. They think they're helping me by trying to force me into these masculine pants that I would rather not wear. They ignore the fact that that respecting your husband has been an honorable thing to do up until very recent historical events. I get looked down on for being a stay at home mom. I get looked down on for understanding that I have my own equally important role in my marriage. Hell, I've even been ridiculed just for getting up to grab my husband a beer!

Very rarely my husband will make a decision affecting myself or our family that I don't agree with, but it always turns out to be for the best. I wouldn't have married him if I didn't expect him to be capable of filling a husbands shoes. Women often make decisions based on emotions. That's not sexist, it's just the way we're wired. Men are wired to be more effective leaders. I don't believe my beliefs make any other woman better than me. I'm just choosing to go the route that has been proven to work for thousands of years. Divorce and fatherless children are a recent development. I think there is a reason for that.

I don't know how this girl is being treated, but ultimately it's her choice. Sometimes you think you're helping, but you're really not.

edit on 18-1-2013 by Ireminisce because: (no reason given)

edit on 18-1-2013 by Ireminisce because: (no reason given)

And you ma'am, are a fine woman for what you have written. Your husband surely is a lucky man!
I wish you both a everlasting, loving marriage, in this life and the next.
Salud to you!

reply to post by resoe26


Yeah, that's why I said, at least he tried. I wouldn't expect him to jump into everything, unless it was physical. He really doesn't give us enough info though, like was she present? Was SHE objecting? Does he have a crush on her?

Hey OP, can you give us a little more detail about the circumstances when you said what you did?

Thank you

Originally posted by chiefsmom
reply to post by resoe26

 

Yeah, that's why I said, at least he tried. I wouldn't expect him to jump into everything, unless it was physical. He really doesn't give us enough info though, like was she present? Was SHE objecting? Does he have a crush on her?

Hey OP, can you give us a little more detail about the circumstances when you said what you did?

Thank you

I'm gonna be this guy has feelings for her and is jealous.

I don't see anything wrong with pulling the roommate(friend?) aside, and saying "You're being a dick. Knock it off." I've done it to my own friends, and vice versa. I would never do it in front of their GF or spouse though. However, you may not be as close to your roommate as I am with a few of my friends. We're often brutally honest with each other. Pick and choose your battles bro. Sometimes you're better off leaving it alone.

As to women being people, too. You obviously already know the answer to that question.

reply to post by resoe26


Wow, so hard to believe there are nice guys out there, that don't have an alternate motive?

You big cynic you!

Here's a big hug!!!!

reply to post by darkbake


Throughout history it has shown that when society becomes degenerate, the treatment of women and children decline.

sounds like he needs a girlfriend that'll straighten him out ...

reply to post by darkbake
Of course women are people too! You have made your opinion known to your roommate and unless his treatment of his girlfriend becomes abusive it is best to leave it at that; after all his girlfriend is tolerating his behavior so ultimately "that's on her". She either will tire of it and move on, or in some way she likes it and will continue to tolerate it. It is her choice, and since you have to live with this guy my advice to you is that unless abuse is occurring or you plan on making new living arrangements- don't make waves.

reply to post by littled16


Exactly. If she does tire of it and chooses to move on then she will have learned from it. She'll be be better for it, because she'll have a better idea of what she wants from a relationship. Live and let live.