The War on Men

Originally posted by FailedProphet
Nice opinion piece from a woman who "gets it": Feminism has gone too far, and men have had enough.

Surveys show the number of young women who want to get married is on the rise...even as the number of young men wanting marriage is falling. Men are realizing that marriage is a bad deal for them: with a 50% chance of divorce and a system that baldly favors women over men in divorce court, they are likely to wind up losing half their stuff and in poverty, paying alimony and child suppor for children they rarely see and have little hand in raising.

Meanwhile culture is unambiguously pro-female an anti-male, for decades now portraying men as bumbling Homer Simpsons and women as superior in every way in movies, TV, magazines, and books. Young men go into hock for college liberal arts educations heavy on feminist theory and man-bashing.

Perhaps worst of all, women have lost all traditional qualities of femininity, taught by media and academics that these are "oppressive," and become more like pale copies of men. Hollywood's relentless infatuation with homosexuality aside, most men don't want to marry and date other men -- or women who act more like men than women.

The pendulum has swung too far. Men are waking up to the war on men, and opting out of systems that oppress them.

... I’ve accidentally stumbled upon a subculture of men who’ve told me, in no uncertain terms, that they’re never getting married. When I ask them why, the answer is always the same: Women aren’t women anymore....

...It is precisely this dynamic – women good/men bad – that has destroyed the relationship between the sexes. Yet somehow, men are still to blame when love goes awry. Heck, men have been to blame since feminists first took to the streets in the 1970s.

But what if the dearth of good men, and ongoing battle of the sexes, is – hold on to your seats – women’s fault?

You’ll never hear that in the media. All the articles and books (and television programs, for that matter) put women front and center, while men and children sit in the back seat. But after decades of browbeating the American male, men are tired. Tired of being told there’s something fundamentally wrong with them. Tired of being told that if women aren’t happy, it’s men’s fault.

More at source (Fox)

If you and your partner desire a more traditional style of marriage based on female subservience, that's between you two. Please don't try to dictate to the rest of us how we should adopt your backwards way of reasoning.

Please define for me what a woman is. Is our place to simply serve the men in our lives, or are we entitled to transcend those limitations and be the best that we can possibly be?

You whine about a system that you describe as oppressive to men, yet advocate a return to times when men openly oppressed women. That's not the solution. People, male and female, need to learn to respect each other, and to work together to resolve our differences.

Originally posted by Spike Spiegle
reply to post by FailedProphet

 

Well to be fair FOX NEWS is far, far ,far from unbiased.

So I can understand the hesitation to use it as a source, do you have any other news sources or links?


SS

edit on 113030p://pm3025 by Spike Spiegle because: (no reason given)

pewresearch.org...

The share of young men (ages 18 to 34) who say that having a successful marriage is one of the most important things in their lives has dropped six percentage points since 1997, from 35% to 29%. For women, the opposite effect occurred, as the share voicing this opinion rose from 28% to 37%.

If you weren't so closed-minded you could have clicked the dreaded fox link, seen the information referenceing the reputable Pew Research Center, and googled it yourself to confirm. Huffington Post, to name one of many examples, references the same survey.

The link won't bite you, you know. I guess you don't trust your own ability to sift through information at a questionable source and decide what is valid and what is invalid.

reply to post by FailedProphet


All right, I can explain this a bit more from the perspective of psychology. Society today is forcing men to be someone who they are not programmed to be. This, in turn, makes them emotionally unstable. Studies have been done that show that women are getting tired of dating emotionally unstable men.

I think that about sums it up. I've been watching trends in the dating community and this is starting to pop up more.

I'm not backing suppressing women by any means, I'm just saying that I have been in culture zones where men are afraid to be themselves for fear of social retaliation, and this causes emotional problems. If a man is feminized, I think that's great - but sometimes, they are faking it to fit in, and wow... that sounds harsh.

I'm female and I will never say that all females are perfect... nobody is and it doesn't matter what sex you are but what I really don't like about this line of thinking, whether it's directed against females or males is that it always seems to bring about massive generalizations. "women have lost their femininity" or "men are becoming feminized," maybe some are but all? Short answer, No.

People just don't fit into neat little categories no matter how hard we try to stuff ourselves into them. My personal opinion, we put way too much emphasis on divisions that really don't even matter.

As for feminism/war on men. We need balance. Not pro-women, not pro-men but pro-human.

reply to post by darkbake

Society today is forcing men to be someone who they are not programmed to be.

How is society forcing men to be something they aren't programmed to be?

reply to post by Trustfund


That's a good question, Trustfund. I am talking about trends that happen in highly liberal zones, like the liberal arts college I went to that was 70% female, 95% atheist and heavily socialist. Some issues a liberal society might face aren't apparent unless you are actually in one - in this society, one had to become highly feminized in order to avoid being socially ostracized - this meant a lot of things, like hiding one's true thoughts, becoming super-sensitive to each other's feelings, lots of passive-aggressive behavior between men, etc.

Any kind of structure or reliability or sense of closeness (with anyone) or wanting exclusivity (with a girl) were not easily found, either - although possible, of course.

I mean there were a lot of good things about it, too, that I really liked - but in the end, it was too crazy. It was cool to experience a place where religion was a non-issue though, and women were in charge. It totally changes one's perspective. I'd never give up the experience.

reply to post by FailedProphet


Dude, you would love this site.

www.henrymakow.com...


The story was written by this woman at the Fox news site, its her words, not fox news words.
People need to quit discounting everything just because Fox is the source.

Suzanne Venker has written extensively about politics, parenting, and the influence of feminism on American society. Her latest book, "How to Choose a Husband (And Make Peace with Marriage)" will be published in February 2013. Visit howtochooseahusband.com for more information Read more: www.foxnews.com...

reply to post by Trustfund


this a post to thread that i did some weeks ago, this statment that i made was about women/man equality, and was inspired from a thread i saw some months back, i saw a video that had a women stating this same stament in her own words. when i saw the vid it instantly made sense and that is why i used it then, and on the previous thread, and am now using it. of course this is not her exact words, but i did sum them up and added my own two sense. can u explain why there has been a double standard amongst men and women even though we are supposed to have equal rights?

so does the double standard of men and women, we should all be equal, all the time, not just when it suits women. for instance in an emergency situation it is still the standard of women and children first. since women have equal rights now shouldn't it be children and an equal number of men and women first, or at least children and those in the most need of rescue, man or women? this is just one example of equal rights not being equal. and this idea of unequal equality can serve many situations not just rescue situations(relationships,workplace,bars,ect.) another one is spousal abuse as mentioned before. and for those that would like to turn this around on me and try to indicate im a cowered for not letting women go first in a emergency situation can save it. my life is no precious thing to me, the only thing that would get me inline before other people is if my kids life were in danger and it was necessary for me to live to ensure there safety. we all end up dust and bones and are energy lives on in one form or another. no need to fight what is coming for all of us.

My mother loved watching "Golden Girls", watched it all the time, so it was practically always on. I even got to know the characters and even somewhat enjoyed it at times. Decent writing, interesting story lines... but anyway...

Blanche, the resident "floosy" was dating a guy and they were talking about men and women being equal. Her response was "I don't want to be your equal, I want to be a whole lot better than you". That was from a time when women were put on pedastals, they were "taken care of", they were honored and respected. They had all the same opportunities, but at the same time, knew there was a difference. They knew that the woman beared the children, centered the family and the man was meant to be strong, supportive and honored in his own way.

If that's the mindset that is followed, then it needs to be shared with both participants in the relationship. If it's shared by both, fine, but if it's the mindset of only one of them, it isn't going to work. It's the same way with other mindsets. If one party has a certain mindset and the other doesn't, it's not going to work.

In today's world, there are thousands, tens of thousands of mindsets out there. Find the person who shares yours for your relationship and you will both be happy. Granted, some mindsets are easier to find than others, but if it's what you want, then you need to find someone else who is already in the same general mindset area or you're not going to be successful at it.

I held on to the "old fashioned mindset" in many ways and some of the new mindset in others and that's fine. You have to be honest with yourself before you can be honest with someone else. If you act the way you act just to "fit in", you are not going to be happy. Learn to trust yourself, be honest with yourself, then learn to do it with other people. It will bring you happiness in the longrun.

There has to be more communication today, talk to your husband or wife about what it is you want and listen to what it is they want. Be willing to compromise a bit in order to find the situation that is best for both of you.... or just keep demanding that things be done your way and enjoy being alone....or with a doormat.

Well this may not be popular, but....
While I don't want to be home, in the kitchen, pregnant, I still want my big strong man, that acts like a man.
He kills spiders, works hard and protects me from things I'm frightened of. People too.

I'm afraid that I do believe feminism has gone to far.
Why should I, as a woman, get a job, over a man that is more qualified, because I am a woman?
(Actually happened!!!!!!!)

You know what, If your a women, and you want to have equal rights, fine.
But everything should be equal, including your job skills.

Each oppressed group, once no longer living in oppression, seeks to oppress their oppressors as a way to avoid future oppression. And no, try as I may, I couldn't work a sixth version of the word "oppress" into that sentence.

Hasn't anyone else noticed this pattern?

I'm interested in hearing about ANY oppressed people who, once given power, wield it responsibly.

It's always been about who reigns over the animals. Sure, we want to believe we'd be responsible, and admirably so, but we'd be just as obsessed with not being oppressed again. And there's just one way to make sure you aren't part of the oppressed group again...

Women are extremely self conscious, self centered, and down right selfish......
That is their" Hard wired" state as the progeny bearer of the race......
Men on the other hand are not so totally self absorbed as their counterparts...
This leads to a whole gammut of abuse which men bear in silence mostly.
Not many woman are even willing to put her life on the line every working day to support their spouse....
Yet men go down to the sea and the mines, and the steel mills, they do a great deal of the back breaking and dangerous jobs which keep civilisation civilised for the" weaker sex"....
Men die sooner, and suffer far more injuries of serious natures than women do....in the workplace.
Theres always exemptions made for a womans performance compared the a man....
For this sacrifice of a mans life and health, he gets to go home at night to a badly cooked, and hastily thrown together meal, and the houshold chores which require his personal attention....
He is not allowed to be scared of spiders or mice, and is expected to get crap up to the elbows when the plumbing goes wonky or the basement floods out.and never have a headache....
And after 30 0r more years of this he is lucky if he doesnt get treated to the next decade of marriage to a surly demeaning, entirely illogically selfish menpausal maniac who eventually breaks up the mariage or totally breaks whats left of his spirit.
From NO modern woman comes this same kind of loyalty or faithful service....
The pendulum has indeed swung.Men awaking up to the rip off big time....

Its just some jokes ladies.

Originally posted by chasingbrahman

Each oppressed group, once no longer living in oppression, seeks to oppress their oppressors as a way to avoid future oppression.

I'm interested in hearing about ANY oppressed people who, once given power, wield it responsibly.

This is true, I have heard many people say something to the extent of "men have ruled us for thousands of years now it is women's turn" although I personally want gender equality. Also, the rate of men going to college has fallen to 42% vs. women's 58% and continues to fall.

Women want all this power, yet they still want to marry up?

I think there are going to be some issues, whether feminists want to deal with them or not. Hopefully they don't deal with those issues with more man-bashing.

I think that African-Americans did a really good job with their equal-rights movement. Even when they were slaves, they never rose in masses and suppressed the slave-owners... and then with Martin Luther King, they held peaceful protests... and now they are content, for the most part, not suppressing white people. None of them I meet are bitter about white people, but usually really cool and content!

reply to post by Trustfund


I would also like to point out that these behaviors I mentioned in my previous previous post have a tendency to prevent anything productive from being done, therefore resulting in men losing status and actually becoming less desirable mates to women.

I think that eventually, if it hasn't happened already, women are going to get frustrated with all the "useless men" out there and who knows how the feminists will deal with this issue, they might screw it up.

I think if a guy is participating in these behaviors thinking they are going to have a better chance of finding a mate, they will left off poor and unattractive... poor bastards.

P.S. I know I'm getting like no stars for these controversial posts, but I'm not afraid to bring up the viewpoints that are usually suppressed.

Originally posted by PurpleChiten

In today's world, there are thousands, tens of thousands of mindsets out there. Find the person who shares yours for your relationship and you will both be happy. Granted, some mindsets are easier to find than others, but if it's what you want, then you need to find someone else who is already in the same general mindset area or you're not going to be successful at it.

I agree with PurpleChiten totally about this. And that vision of allowing all kinds of mindsets is a great one for the future.

Well,

I cook and grow my own food

Clean my own clothes

Pay my own bills

Wash MY dishes

Self gratify

So yeah, I'm my own Manwoman.


If you are looking for traditional Women, You have to go to third-world countries where Women are not westernized.
Or if you are in the US, I would move next to small towns where there are tight communities - away from the city.

It's disgusting: I see underage prostitution all the time where I live. The thing is, these little girls are not professional prostitutes, they just like to dress up like one and get picked up by random adults.

Something is causing our children to become over sexed to the point where when they grow up, they no longer have what it takes to maintain a healthy relationship.

Sex is a BIG part of most relationships. It is something sacred in my book.
I think a lot of Women hate themselves tremendously for the lives they've led growing up as a child.
They don't see themselves as beautiful, sexy, feminine beings - but rather, a reject of society.

Usually, finger pointing is a sign of immaturity. Women who blame Men for everything are the ones that never grew up.
And vice a versa.

In closing, I blame TV for our under-performing Women.
I just want our Women back.

Feminism in its real meaning of equality has not even scratched the surface my dear.

And no we're not going back to the war drums and the burkas and the primitive dog eat dog, demon emulating Saturnistic Crapola!

What is going to happen is MOTHER will be honored, that energy, in PEACE, EQUALITY, (the real kind like the Venus project or Norway, it has good social programs too. social programs equalize women and children).

No wars, no tolerance for dog eat dog, or brutality, or pyramids, or kings, or thrones. The greatest amongst you is the least.

No homeless, no worth being what you do, but being who you are. And all are equal.

In other words, Heaven on Earth, Not Hell on Earth!

When dad is decent and loving and is equal to mom, and wedded in equality to her, we'll have a good world.

But your concepts are immature, childish at best, and programmed hellzone NWO at worst.

reply to post by FailedProphet


I tried to date Feminist....BIIGGGGGGG MISTAKE!!!!!!! Free love=excuse to cheat

reply to post by JDmOKI


I'm just curious, did she accuse you of anything or say that it was your fault in some manner?

And Unity, I do agree with you, especially your concept of marriage.

In the past, married couples hardly knew each other in some cases - it has slowly been moving forward since then. I look forward to the day that I can marry someone I can call my best friend as well.