Witnessed a Tragic Event Today....Now I am having Flash Backs...They won't stop

I will post this now before it is National News. I have refrained from using too much graphic detail.

Today I witnessed a tragic event. While I was at the Gun Range this afternoon a local man turned the gun on himself and took his own life. I heard the shot, saw the destruction of his face along with all the gore, peoples reactions, The panic that perused afterwards. I don't remember driving home, now I am here a few hours later and since then my wife has told me I have blanked out several times. I have 8 missed calls from the local news stations asking for a statement. Two reporters have been to my house. I don't know how they got my number or address.

I have been to war, I have not ever had a flashback from this conflict. Never had any symptoms of PTSD. My wife has already called a therapist for me to talk to tomorrow because she is very worried. When I get home I have a set routine check on the baby and go out back and play with the dogs. I have been in bed since about 1:30 staring at the ceiling. Not having any interest in either. Wondering if I could have stopped this man, If he could have turned the gun on me or other patrons. It's crazy I was sitting outside having a cigarette with this man just a few minutes earlier. He gave no signs no warnings. If he had said anything I would have told the range master.

Since the suicide this afternoon my brain is recounting past events and I cant stop it. I have had very personal events with suicide and now they all keep flooding my head...I can't stop them. Sorry if this post seems more like rambling.

I DO NOT WANT A SECOND AMENDMENT ARGUMENT HERE. MODS PLEASE KEEP PEOPLE ON TOPIC. IF THIS MAN WAS THIS DISTURBED HE WOULD HAVE DONE IT ANYWAYS.

I just don't know.....

reply to post by JValhalla


I am so sorry you witnessed this today. There was nothing you could do, don't let it control your...*what if* thoughts.

Yes, talking with a trained therapist will help you sort your thoughts on this terrible event. I send kind thoughts for Serenity and Clarity to you....

Des

I'm so sorry to hear youve experienced this. It must have made a different sort of impact after having spent even a bit of personal time with him.

I hope you find peace of mind and I'm glad your wife is someone who loves you and is taking some proactive measures to help.

Just talking about it will make you feel better, the conversation will not go round in circles like these thoughts in your head. Try your best to take your mind of it.

All the best, wifi.

Well, if it's any comfort, it sounds like there's no way you could have known what that bloke would do, and therefore there was nothing you could have done to prevent it. It wasn't your fault.

But... It comes with the territory. Don't play with guns if you can't handle getting shot at, or seeing another person shot.

#$%@ happens. And this was definitely out of your control so there should be no personal feelings of remorse or "what ifs".

It's not nice to think about not caring, but at the same time there is no reason to care about something that you had no impact on. This was simply a matter of wrong time, wrong place, and while it may be disturbing, equally disturbing things are seen every day and will continue to be seen. You may be unfortunate enough to see it, or others.

I remember the documentary about the female protestor in Iran had a nasty impact on me. I couldn't get the image out of my head when she started bleeding out after being shot. But the truth is, is that that's life, and humans are fragile.

I'd say continue with what you are doing and speak to a therapist, but mostly focus on the good things around you like family and whatnot, appreciate those things, and move on with your life...

Wow!
Take care,things will be alright.
I think maybe witnessing something like that in your comfort zone verses a war like scenario dislodged some unpleasant memories from your time in a war.(don't know the details,just an assumption).

Peace,
K

How dreadful. I really feel for you, as well as for the man who decided to take his own life in such a bizarre manner.

As other posters have said, it's not your fault, there wasn't a thing you could do to stop him....and, obviously, he didn't want to be stopped, otherwise he would have clued people in (you included) as to what he was planning to do.

It's just one of those things in life that will probably haunt you for a while. Your wife was very wise to have you go in and see a therapist tomorrow. Eventually, you will put it in perspective. You were a bystander to a sad and tragic end to a life. Prayers for that poor man's tortured soul, and my best wishes for you to get this behind you ASAP.

Really sorry you had to see that. It probably is a good idea to see someone like a therapist. Try to remember that you did nothing wrong, as you said if someone is going to do it, they will do it. Sometimes there really are no signs at all. Please try not to blame yourself or go down the road of "what if." What happened is done now. We can do nothing about it and you have done nothing wrong. It is sad but thankfully you and the other patrons are safe.

I'm sorry that this is causing you flashbacks. I know that flashbacks can seem very real. Keep close to your wife/family and focus on your loved ones. Definitely consider speaking with a therapist. Best wishes to you and to the other patrons that had to witness this very tragic event.

Mate, sorry that you had to see that.

I won’t tell you what I have seen, but just to let you know….

You will always see it, but it will get better and you will be able to cope.

You need to get busy with something else – you will lapse and have blackouts, but keep on doing something that you enjoy.

If you don’t have young kids, go and visit friends that do (make sure that they know what’s happening and the environment that you go into will need to be ‘happy and playful’) – that may assist you to see that life is beautiful and does go on in a positive manner.

Yes, also talk to the professionals and tell them what your eyes saw and what your brain still sees.

Hope you get some thought-peace soon.

Mickierocksman

Originally posted by JValhalla
Two reporters have been to my house. I don't know how they got my number or address.

I don't know how it is in Florida, but here in Indiana when you go to a range, you hand over your ID and they keep it until you're done in the range. They also have your name, address and phone number on file. So, if it's close to the same at the ranges in Florida, that's how they got your name and address.

All reporters have to do is ask who was in the range at the time of the suicide and voila. Or, the police asked who was in the range and then the reporter got the information from the police.

There isn't a single thing you could've done. No sense in beating yourself up over it. But, as others have stated, it would be wise to talk to a therapist, counselor. It would be very beneficial.

I'm sorry You had to go through that ! There has been a few suicides in my life , one being a family member and the first thing that comes to mind is " what could I have done " but the truth is there isn't anything I could have done except to deal with it . They had the issues and decided to inflict there pain on everyone around them, there is so much help out there , their is nothing that bad in life to warrant commiting suicide !!! I wish You all the best !

Your wife is a very sensible person. Just to let you know, PTSD has the originating event and at some future time the trigger event. If, and I would like to stress the word, if, this is a trigger event then talking with a trained professional is the best thing you can do.

Many people that saw this will need help. Our society is no longer mentally resilient to withstand what you witnessed. You need to work through this. You have no viable other option.

A similar thing happened to me and it was difficult but ultimately I am a better more aware person for the experience.

P

reply to post by JValhalla


It was a completely new experience, one your body remembers vividly. All emotions and senses went into overdrive and the experience now sits predominantly in your memory. Your body is in recovery and shock because of this accumulation of unknown sensations.

It's happened to me too sir. It's real. You have to face it. There's no suppressing it.

Jeez, talk about having a bad day. That must have been traumatic for sure! Being fresh of course this is uppermost in your mind, but hopefully in time will fade and you will learn to deal with it. HUGS!!

reply to post by JValhalla


I am truly sorry that you have to live through such a horrible ordeal. I cannot imagine how difficult that would be to witness.

Your current state is normal and is more indicative of shock than anything else. Traumatic events can take awhile to get past. They are not, however, necessarily a path to PTSD. It's good that you have an appointment with a therapist as that will help you avoid longer term issues and raise the odds that you will not develop PTSD in the future.

I wish you the best of luck and offer my sympathies to you.

~Heff

Crazy thing to witness. Even crazier how it happened. It always does seem like the most normal down to Earth people, end up doing something crazy. It'll get better though, good luck man!

I am profoundly sorry for your experience.

You said

I have been to war, I have not ever had a flashback from this conflict. Never had any symptoms of PTSD.

I was sitting outside having a cigarette with this man just a few minutes earlier. He gave no signs no warnings.

This experience was more personal. And, I suspect being in the military, you feel a certain responsibility for your buddies, your friends, thus this becomes personal.

You are doing the right thing to get help, but try to remember, everything happens as it does for a reason. There is a reason you were there. Maybe in the future it will be a help to you.

My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Thoughts and prayers are with you, JValhalla. But yes, I hope you find the help you need to get over this tragedy. Try if you can to spend more time with your family too, and know how much you love them dearly.