ATS, What Should I Do?

Originally posted by Ericthenewbie
reply to post by ollncasino

 

So by your interpretation, the mother isn't selfish for forcing her daughter to be something she is not just so the mother can stay happy?!? ridiculous!

back to my previous point...what if she was happy fiddling with kids or even a serial killer?should her family just say its OK she's just being happy?

reply to post by ollncasino


Mother Nature isn't the boss.
You have very outdated ignorant views.

reply to post by glen200376


Wow last time I checked bisexuality wasn't a crime..yet child molestation and serial killing are....you are trying to compare apples to oranges to make an ignorant point.


reply to post by ollncasino



Bisexuals, lesbians and gays can still get married and have children where I'm from.

Originally posted by glen200376

Originally posted by Ericthenewbie
reply to post by ollncasino

 

So by your interpretation, the mother isn't selfish for forcing her daughter to be something she is not just so the mother can stay happy?!? ridiculous!

back to my previous point...what if she was happy fiddling with kids or even a serial killer?should her family just say its OK she's just being happy?

How are you equating child abuse and murderers to being " bicurious"?

Originally posted by violet

Mother Nature isn't the boss.
You have very outdated ignorant views.

There is nothing outdated or ignorant about preferring that your child marries a person of the opposite sex and has children.

It is perfectly natural.

Originally posted by ollncasino

Originally posted by violet

Mother Nature isn't the boss.
You have very outdated ignorant views.

There is nothing outdated or ignorant about preferring that your child marries a person of the opposite sex and has children.

It is perfectly natural.

edit on 24-9-2012 by ollncasino because: (no reason given)

It's only " natural" if you naturally want to do that.
its not fair to impose your views onto others, including your children.

The op said she has no interest in marrying a man and having children so your argument is invalid
Besides I meant your posts in general are ignorant


You're clearly against gays and that makes your views outdated.

reply to post by violet


No I think that everyone has had Neo liberal policies pushed upon them to accept gays.If their was no threat of hate crime hanging over people they would be a lot more vocal about not accepting gays.I think you badly over estimate support for gays.Don't get me wrong I wish them no harm but I do object to teaching people,espicially kids that this is a normal lifestyle choice.
No matter how much noise militant gays make it will never be the norm,like it or lump it.
edit:just to add,she has no wish to marry a man yet she'll lead him on online for months.Just shows she has no morals and is a manipulator,he's well shot of her.

I think your true dilemma here is the fact that you are dependent on your mother for a place to live....

If you lived in your own place then I believe you would do whatever you wanted to do regarding a relationship with whoever......

You cannot tell your mom about your sexuality because you believe that she would kick you out the house. But if it was your own place to live then she cannot kick you out.

But at the end of the day it is not worth hiding your true identity that is no way to live. If people don't like what you are then that is their fault, there is no purpose in living a lie...

Your mother would have to come around to the knowledge that her offspring is gay,bi, whatever, she will still love you no matter what she says.........

All the best to you......

Originally posted by Myomistress
reply to post by jude11

 

I'm sorry, I was sure this was the RELATIONSHIP section of the forum and I saw other advice topics and genuinely need advice. I'm sorry that you apparently have something inside of your lower region. If I wanted stars, I would start a topic to gain stars. You didn't have to come into this topic and openly insult me for no reason, you must be a very unhappy person that you needed that short self esteem boost. I hope it felt good.

Totally agree with you Myomistress, there is no need for that behaviour..........some ignorant folks on here sometimes with brains the size of a peanut...........

Originally posted by glen200376

Originally posted by Ericthenewbie
reply to post by ollncasino

 

So by your interpretation, the mother isn't selfish for forcing her daughter to be something she is not just so the mother can stay happy?!? ridiculous!

back to my previous point...what if she was happy fiddling with kids or even a serial killer?should her family just say its OK she's just being happy?

Sort your brain out mate, that's just stupid and ignorant and nothing at all to do with the topic at hand......to put kiddy fiddlers and serial killers in the same bracket is totally ridiculous.................How old are you? I would say no older than 16, am I right?

Originally posted by violet

Besides I meant your posts in general are ignorant

You're clearly against gays and that makes your views outdated.

If we remove your ad hominem attacks, there isn't a great deal of substance to your arguments.

Originally posted by violet

its not fair to impose your views onto others, including your children.

Yet, that is precisely what you are attempting to do to me.

The irony.

Originally posted by ollncasino

Originally posted by violet

Besides I meant your posts in general are ignorant

You're clearly against gays and that makes your views outdated.

If we remove your ad hominem attacks, there isn't a great deal of substance to your arguments.

Originally posted by violet

its not fair to impose your views onto others, including your children.

Yet, that is precisely what you are attempting to do to me.

The irony.

I laughed out loud at your response...the only person here that has openly admitted that they are a mother of a gay daughter which is inline with part of the OP's questions/concerns, is violet and you claim she has no substance to her posts? Yet you argue the OP's mother's selfishness trumps what you perceive is selfishness by the daughter. Please explain how the mother's feelings are more important than the daughters? Better yet explain how your input into this thread out weights violet's input?

I'll just point out the obvious in that you started the pushing of your views onto others well before violet entered the thread...the only irony is you trying to play the victim now!

Originally posted by Ericthenewbie
I laughed out loud at your response...the only person here that has openly admitted that they are a mother of a gay daughter which is inline with part of the OP's questions/concerns, is violet and you claim she has no substance to her posts?

Having a gay daughter gives her the right to call me ignorant and outdated and to force her views onto me?

Who knew.

My son is heterosexual. Does that give my posts 'substance' and the right to be an advocate for heterosexuality?

Originally posted by Ericthenewbie

Yet you argue the OP's mother's selfishness trumps what you perceive is selfishness by the daughter. Please explain how the mother's feelings are more important than the daughters? Better yet explain how your input into this thread out weights violet's input?

Other people's feelings do matter in this world, including the OP's mother.

Originally posted by Ericthenewbie
I'll just point out the obvious in that you started the pushing of your views onto others well before violet entered the thread...the only irony is you trying to play the victim now!

Not a victim, thank you very much. Merely pointing out the irony of violet accusing me of imposing my views on others, when she is trying to impose her views on me.

Remember. My son is heterosexual. That presumably gives my pro heterosexual posts substance according to your logic!

Originally posted by Myomistress
It's not about sex and it never should be at the possible beginning of a relationship.

Yes it is.

If sex was removed from your dilemma it would just be about people and friendships and a much simpler issue that probably wouldn't involve your family or choosing between people, they would ALL be your friends and things are a lot simpler.

Because you are also thinking with your genitals it becomes more physical and involves more moralistic issues that control things right from the start.

I wish you luck, seems like sex is controlling your choices and that often causes problems for those with little self control.

reply to post by ollncasino


Violet having a gay daughter, gives her an educated first hand experience of the OP's dilemma which is the topic of this thread. Also I didn't see the post were she tried to impose her views onto you, she simply came to the conclusion (as many of us have) that your views are ignorant and outdated based on your posting history in this thread.

Heterosexuality actually doesn't have a place in this thread as the topic is about dealing with bisexuality. So your son's sexuality is irrelevant ... but now knowing you have a son, I ask you what you would have done had your son approached you and told you he was bisexual?

So if "other people's feelings do matter in this world, including the OP's mother" as you stated, why are you diminishing the importance of the OP's feelings? What make one's feelings more important than someone else?

I know you are not a victim...you are just trying to play one! That's what made me laugh so hard!

Remember heterosexuality isn't the topic of this thread...how to deal with bisexuality is the topic.. your son's sexuality again, is irrelevant and your posts are still ignorant and outdated according to my logic

Originally posted by Ericthenewbie
Also I didn't see the post were she tried to impose her views onto you, she simply came to the conclusion (as many of us have) that your views are ignorant and outdated based on your posting history in this thread.

Thanks. That made me laugh out loud.

Originally posted by Ericthenewbie
Heterosexuality actually doesn't have a place in this thread as the topic is about dealing with bisexuality. So your son's sexuality is irrelevant ... but now knowing you have a son, I ask you what you would have done had your son approached you and told you he was bisexual?

I would tell him it would make his mother and I happier if he choose to follow the heterosexual side of his nature rather than his homosexual one.

Originally posted by Ericthenewbie
So if "other people's feelings do matter in this world, including the OP's mother" as you stated, why are you diminishing the importance of the OP's feelings? What make one's feelings more important than someone else?

Was I? I could have sworn that you were doing the opposite and treating her feelings as paramount.

Originally posted by Ericthenewbie
I know you are not a victim...you are just trying to play one! That's what made me laugh so hard!

That's good as we have clearly given each other a good laugh.

Originally posted by Ericthenewbie
Remember heterosexuality isn't the topic of this thread...how to deal with bisexuality is the topic.. your son's sexuality again, is irrelevant and your posts are still ignorant and outdated according to my logic

Right... I could have sworn she was trying to decide between a heterosexual relationship with a man and gay relationship with a women.

Nonetheless, if your artificial distinction is taken to its logical conclusion this thread isn't about being gay or heterosexual. Its about being bi-sexual.

By your own logic, violet's experience with her gay daughter is of no relevance!

Originally posted by ollncasino

Originally posted by Ericthenewbie
Also I didn't see the post were she tried to impose her views onto you, she simply came to the conclusion (as many of us have) that your views are ignorant and outdated based on your posting history in this thread.

Thanks. That made me laugh out loud.

Originally posted by Ericthenewbie
Heterosexuality actually doesn't have a place in this thread as the topic is about dealing with bisexuality. So your son's sexuality is irrelevant ... but now knowing you have a son, I ask you what you would have done had your son approached you and told you he was bisexual?

I would tell him it would make his mother and I happier if he choose to follow the heterosexual side of his nature rather than his homosexual one.

Originally posted by Ericthenewbie
So if "other people's feelings do matter in this world, including the OP's mother" as you stated, why are you diminishing the importance of the OP's feelings? What make one's feelings more important than someone else?

Was I? I could have sworn that you were doing the opposite and treating her feelings as paramount.

Originally posted by Ericthenewbie
I know you are not a victim...you are just trying to play one! That's what made me laugh so hard!

That's good as we have clearly given each other a good laugh.

Originally posted by Ericthenewbie
Remember heterosexuality isn't the topic of this thread...how to deal with bisexuality is the topic.. your son's sexuality again, is irrelevant and your posts are still ignorant and outdated according to my logic

Right... I could have sworn she was trying to decide between a heterosexual relationship with a man and gay relationship with a women.

Nonetheless, if your artificial distinction is taken to its logical conclusion this thread is about being gay or heterosexual. Its about being bi-sexual.

By your own logic, violet's experience with her gay daughter is of no relevance!

So by saying it would make you and your wife happier if he chose the heterosexual side of his nature it doesn't diminish the love you and your wife have for your son...does it?

So by swearing I was doing the opposite, your are admitting that the mother's feelings are indeed more important then the daughter's feelings....I'm still not sure how you come to the mother's feelings trumping the daughter's feelings....been waiting for you to properly explain how you come to that conclusion for a few posts now.

I guess you missed the sex ed. class were they explain the definition of bisexuality (i.e. one's attraction to both sexes). ...which is what this topic is about.

Violet's experience with her gay daughter is completely relevant as part of the OP's dilemma is communication about her bisexuality to her mother.....I'm not sure who could be more insightful short of having a female poster with a bisexual daughter comment in the thread.

Well you said you`re bi curious that doesn`t make you bi. you might try it and decide it isn`t your thing in which case you don`t have to worry about your family finding out because you won`t be doing it anymore.
if you decide it is your thing, again so what? your family doesn`t have to know,are you not allowed to have "friends" of the same gender?
unless you are planning on having sex in front of your family then they don`t ever have to know that you are having sexual relations with your female "friend".

Originally posted by Ericthenewbie
So by swearing I was doing the opposite, your are admitting that the mother's feelings are indeed more important then the daughter's feelings....

I'm still not sure how you come to the mother's feelings trumping the daughter's feelings....

been waiting for you to properly explain how you come to that conclusion for a few posts now.

So your rubric appears to be that bisexuals as individuals should follow what makes them happiest as an individual no matter the harm it may cause those around them?

Is that correct?

Go with the guy, dildos are a poor substitute for the real thing. The chick won't be able to give you children either. Just let nature take it's course. There is nothing natural about women wanting to have sex with eachother, or men for that matter. If nature had intended for that to occur women would be able to get women pregnant and men get men pregnant and it doesn't happen. If distance is an issue then go be with him. My wife moved 2 hours away from her family to be with me and while N.C. is a pretty good piece away from P.A., the long term prospects are far greater for you and a man than you and a woman. Let your conscience guide you in this matter. Family is important.