Daughter has a New Laptop with Webcam.....Help!!!!

Originally posted by DeusImperator
Prisonlifeeee.... Monitoring your children, remote viewing... Room searches?! ROOM SEARCHES?!

and if your teen child is watching internet pron, what do you do? Do you really want to know that, and do you seriously want to have an conversation with your children about internet pron?!

-awkward-

YES! Most definitely.

I'm no prude -- but I do support Age Appropriate - - - which of course is not set in stone and depends on the child.

Porn sites are notorious for viruses - - selling mailing lists - - and hidden charges. If you are under my roof - - using my internet - - Damn! Straight I want to know what sites you go to - - especially porn sites.

Originally posted by Dreamer99
I have 3 kids. Until they are old enough, all computers in the house will have software to limit how they interact on the web, and they will be told that the network is monitored by me.

Absolutely!

We start the kids on a computer at age 2. My grandson taught himself to read by the time he was 3 - using the computer.

We have him on a Kids Web Site - - "Kid Zui". He loves YouTube - - but can't get to it from Kid Zui - - it makes him mad. Too bad

So she is sending racy pictures with her phone and camming with her bra at 14 . only 2 things come to mind . Take away her phone and computer if she is doing this , it is child pornography . Maybe have an police officer recite the law for her and the consequences of teenagers doing such crap on the net. 2nd maybe she is lacking in self esteem and and is looking for acceptance from her peers. Taking can achieve amazing things , spying burns bridges and causes resentment.

As long as shes not on webcam chatting sites, chat-roulette/Omegle/Stickam or whatever. You'll be fine. Just remind her that EVERYTHING she puts on the internet is there FOREVER. The first time I heard that, contemplated it and realized the totality of the internet it shook me to the core.

You just need to educate her on the dos and don't and never assume that she WILL just advise her once and she will create her own path. Oh and push her toward anonymity, always better place when no one has a trace.

reply to post by pointr97


Stop trying to spy on your daughter, that is just creepy.

Well it is simple, you are the adult. My 14 yo and 13 yo have lap tops BUT my wife and i only allow 3 hours a week doing what they like under supervision and 40mins every night for home work supervised. And that works for my family.

reply to post by pointr97


So let me get this straight... you buy your daughter a laptop with a webcam, and THEN worry about it and ask for help? This is similar to the guy that smokes 2 packs a day for 40 years and then sues the tobacco company. If you were so worried about it then why did you buy it in the first place? Anyway... just go in and delete the webcam drivers and it's a done deal.

I heard alot of suggestion, Unlnstall the webcam driver, Given her certain amount of time to be on it everyday, Firewalls. Thats all good. No Spying, every teenager hates a spy. they want to take a big step let them, but make sure you catch them they fall. like the Skype Incident. Cool to skype but not in bra. No Remote Access, it'll creep them out.

Background Check: I have a niece shes around your daughter age, She has facebook, twitter, Oovoo, Skype. all i see from her is boys Suck, Parents are buggin right now. normal teenage stuff(for their generation). one thing that get me is that she post pics Posing, skin exposed, basically showing her assets with clothes on. i questioned her and she say cause i want too. All im saying is that, No offence, if you know your daughter is not going to do anything strange for a lil Piece of change you have nothing too worry about. I skype with Girls 17- 18 years old, none of them show bra nice convos tho.

Don't worry She'll be fine. Don't ram your foot on the gas yet, Just take it slow.

BTW I'm 20. So why should my opinion count. My mom believed she knew me well, when people in my age group knew me better. But still me n my mother has a connection she was strict but i was passive and open minded, so i grew up a lot faster...Hope my opinion Relieved some stress from the heart...Now that i realize how many people are trolls here it don't make sense.

Hope you figure out your problem soon

Originally posted by OptimusSubprime
reply to post by pointr97

 

So let me get this straight... you buy your daughter a laptop with a webcam, and THEN worry about it and ask for help? This is similar to the guy that smokes 2 packs a day for 40 years and then sues the tobacco company. If you were so worried about it then why did you buy it in the first place? Anyway... just go in and delete the webcam drivers and it's a done deal.

It was a gift from her grandmother.

reply to post by Annee


wow... just freaking wow ... your almost drunk with power!

This sort of behaviour is like prohibition, you are stopping them from doing thing so much that you are unintentionaly making them aware there are bad things that can be done with everything you restrict.

if these things were not restricted they wouldnt see it as something that can potentialy being a way to rebel, as opposed to if they never knew anything that was restricted they would not know there are anything bad to do with it.

your kids are going to absolutely hate you!... and sorry to tell you, they peobably bought there own phones and use them on the sly ... phones hardly cost anuthing these days!

Originally posted by GonzoSinister

Originally posted by KnightFire
All you need to do is log onto your router, setup her computer with a dedicated IP Address then enable logging. You will see what her usage is and where she is going without invading her privacy by being tempted to read her emails and what knots. You will know by the logging information if she is doing web cam interactions with others and how long. You can also, limit the amount of time she is permitted on the internet via the router. Say you don't want her on after 10PM set up usage rights to the IP Address you give her computer and she will not be permitted on the internet after 10.

oooh and this too

Originally posted by boaby_phet
reply to post by Annee

 

wow... just freaking wow ... your almost drunk with power!

This sort of behaviour is like prohibition, you are stopping them from doing thing so much that you are unintentionaly making them aware there are bad things that can be done with everything you restrict.

I would like to hear your own experience in raising a child to adulthood.

Are you open minded enough that your child feels she can discuss anything with you?

reply to post by pointr97


Fourteen year olds are now so sexually sophisticated, know all the latest drugs, etc; Her activity on her laptop is the least of your worries. Your time would be best spent getting to know ALL her friends.
But if she is one of the more popular teens...she has older friends both male and female that you will never know about.

But no matter what you do....in the near future she will hate your guts because you represent control just when she is trying to become a woman.

To put my two cents in here,


I must have installed dozens of spyware upon requests for farthers or mothers throught my years, i never ask as to why, but they always come and ask for help. About 60% of the time its for parents who aren't that computer savvy, but would like to know who and what they are doing online.

The fact of the matter is there are millions of sick people out there, both male and female, both underage and *legal* adult's. A simple scuba dive into the deep web and you begin to grasp the true reality and horror of how dirty and disgusting and at times turns tragic for families throughout the world, regardless of country, religion and color.

Its an extremely dangerous world...the cyber world i mean. When detachment from the physical world becomes a natural part of life, for either your son or daughter, then that is your first warning signal to " Pay Attention "

reply to post by pointr97

This is a very easy thing to overcome, friend. Start the laptop, and get into Bios, hit the Delete key, or F1, or F2, it should actually say which key to hit for "Setup." Look around, and fine where the webcam is, and make it disabled. Just get on it, and hit "enter," and chose "Disable." Save and boot. The webcam will not work, no way, no how. Tell your daughter it must be something wrong with it, and you don't know how to fix it, and you are not paying anyone else to fix it.

You're welcome.

I apologize if this has already been said, but have you and the mother just tried sitting down and talking to her? Telling her how dangerous the internet can be if she wasn't careful. You're in charge of the situation and i understand she deserves privacy, however , at the same time it is your right to make sure she isn't doing anything to endanger herself. I have three boys with the oldest being 5. We do allow him to use the PC , but only to play kids games. Set rules and if she doesn't abide by them then take appropriate action.

Good luck

I think the best way to get around this is only let them use it in site of an adult - or install restrictions on the internet\disable webcam.

If she's 'needs' the webcam on - then you can ask a good few questions why. I'm not sure why a 14yr old would need 'private' time laptop. What would she need to do out of sight?

Whens she's old enough to work and buy her own - then she should be able to be responsible with it. But even still - on your network she applies to your restrictions.

Untangle is a good tool. You'll need a spare (fairly low spec) Pc\laptop with 2 network cards. It sits between your router and your network as a gateway. That way you can control everything coming in and out of your network.