Sorry babe, but you do have a penis....... [WTB]

I had the day off and had the rare ‘pleasure’ of looking after my two kids all by myself – Costa 5 and Leila 3 - due to the fact it was the holidays and mom was working. It was summer in Perth (Australia) which only means one thing - endless days of hot sun and cloudless skies. Where better to take them both I thought to myself but down to the beach for a few hours of relief from the relentless heat. I had also borrowed my sister-in-law’s DSLR camera a week ago with the intention of finally updating the family album, something that was long overdue, and thought this would be the perfect opportunity.

We hit the beach and everything was perfect. The sun was blazing, the sand so hot you barely walk on it barefoot, and the water deep blue and icy cold. Once the kids got their swim gear on they ran off and hit the water without giving their dad any further consideration. I pulled out the large DLSR camera, and looked at it kinda blankly for a while. It took me about 10 minutes just to work out how to turn the thing on, but finally I had it figured and preceded to reel off a few happy snaps. The kids were slightly further down the beach from me and they splashed and ran and stomped down each other’s sandcastles.

I was just lining up another shot when a rather rotund woman in a garish frilly purple one-piece walked past, and I swear I heard her mutter the word “disgusting” as she attempted haul her podge through the sand behind me. I looked up and for a moment I caught a disapproving stare before she turned away and continued down the beach. “Humph, you’re not wrong there” I thought as I watched this human walrus shuffle off across the sand, still unsure as to where exactly the body stopped and the frills began. I thought by her comment she was referring to some of the few tattoos I have that are visible when I have my shirt off. Being an ex-fringe dweller, this type of discrimination I was used to and had long since stopped paying it any heed.

I took a few more pictures as the kids ran around wildly, seemingly having completely forgotten I was even at the beach. It was then I started to get some weird ‘vibes’ and turned and noticed that the large woman from earlier on was talking to 3 guys and pointing in my direction. The guys started walking toward me and I put the camera down, not knowing quite what to expect.

“What do you think you’re doing?” said the first quite abruptly.

“Sitting here minding my own business. What exactly do you think you’re doing?”

“We don’t appreciate perverts on our beach, taking pictures of our kids”

“They’re not our kids, they’re my kids,” I retorted before letting fly with a number of profanities which left them in no doubt as to what I next planned on doing with camera’s zoom lens. They mumbled something incomprehensible and wandered back to where they came from.

Thinking that was the end of it, I turned back to check on Costa and Leila. They were still running around crazy, unaware of what had just gone down. As pissed off as I was, I decided it was probably best I discontinue taking any more photos. It was still a beautiful day and I’d probably got enough already, so I put the previous events to the back of my mind, reapplied some more sunscreen and decided to lie back and attempt to work on my non-existent tan.

Just as I had gotten comfortable, a shadow fell across my person. Pulling down my sunnies, I looked up to see none other than the woman in the purple swimsuit, one of the men who had confronted me, and a lifeguard. I was stunned and opened my mouth to say something but too many expletives were attempting to come out at once and I just looked at them gaping.

“Excuse me sir” the lifeguard began, “I’ve been informed you’ve been taking pictures of the kids. We don’t appro...”

“Look mate, they’re my god damn kids and if I want to take pictures of them I will”

“Sir, the Cottesloe City Council does not approve of people taking pictures down here. We’ve had......um......incidents before”

I was completely flabbergasted. “You’re just about to have another one you know. Look around you”. I gestured at all the other families, complete with mothers who were busily snapping away on their tiny little digitals. “What the hell difference is there”

“Could I just look at the pictures. How do I even know they’re your kids? They aren’t anywhere near you”.

I must have turned a deeper shade of red than I already was, for everyone suddenly took a step back. “Costa, Leila!” I yelled, “Get over here”. They both turned and (thankfully) actually ran over to me for the first time in their lives. Probably thought we were going to get some ice cream. Costa came in and tried to tackle me. Leila followed and simply reached up to grab my hand. “We’re leaving....” I fumed “....Now. Get your stuff”. Probably sensing something deeper was going on, and noticing that I was angry for what was probably the first time that year, they complied and grabbed their towels.

I noticed a look of guilt on the lifeguard’s face, who I think sensed that I was never in fact causing any harm. The other two just stood there trying to avoid my stare.

When my wife got home from work that day I relayed the days unfortunate events to her. “Do I look like a paedophile?” I asked her “Maybe I should have brought down grandpa’s plastic raincoat, god damn morons....”

“I'm sorry baby, I know you’re not going to want to hear this, but the fact is you do have a dick........ No one ever trusts guys around children”.




What kind of society do we now live in when a man is first assumed to be a sexual predator above the far more likely scenario that he is a father? What kind of message does this send out to guys that society itself does not trust you to be in control of your own sexual urges. Does treating every man as a potential rapist or child molester in fact exacerbate the problem? By saying that, because you are a man, because you posses a certain piece of anatomy, we do not expect you to be able exercise any self control; are we in fact creating that which we fear the most?

Many times when I’ve entered into a ‘mother’s’ room at the local shopping centre to change a nappy, I feel the stares of other mothers boring holes into my back. Some women look at me with intrigue that a father would actually be the one changing the nappy. Others look at me as if I just walked into some holy female sanctum with the sole intent of ogling some flesh as they breast-feed their kids and desperately try and re-adjust their muslin wraps. Often when I’ve changed my girl’s nappy somewhere in public, or changed her after going for a swim, I’ve noticed some (usually older) woman staring down at me disapprovingly.

Has society become so normalised to the media’s ratings focus on tales of child sexual abuse that every male is viewed as a sexual predator just waiting for an opportunity to strike?

Good but sad story.

I have 5 kids and have cared for others children all my life. I work in a city park and have on occasion had little girls
(who were alone) come to me and ask for help. One wanted me to fix the chain on her bike for example.

I am always nervous about interacting with strangers kids for fear some busybody will think the wrong thing and make a call.

I's a sad society where I can't even help and be friendly to children for fear of persecution.

It makes me feel bad to walk away and the kid doesn't understand why.

wow to assume they weren't yours to begin with is horrible and even after you told them they were yours, unreal, I wonder if that woman lied a little catch their attention

reply to post by 1littlewolf


At least your wife acknowledges that you do indeed have a dick. It could be worse.

Good story bro.

Originally posted by hapablab
wow to assume they weren't yours to begin with is horrible and even after you told them they were yours, unreal, I wonder if that woman lied a little catch their attention

The woman had some kind of issues with me from the start, I didn't give her the friendliest smile back when I initially caught her eye. And I think the guy was just pissed that I trumped his chance to look like a hero and instead made him look like the idiot he clearly was. So they both probably pushed something which I think deep down they knew didn't need pushing.

I do feel sorry for the lifeguard though. Mid 20's and probably an ex hippy himself - the type of guy I'd normally click with.

I would like to thank our fear mongering media for your plight. You must keep in mind that most people live very sad lives and if they have the opportunity to stand above someone they deem morally beneath them they do it with fervor because they have been trained to do so by our wonderful media.

All the rest of us can do is try, sometimes in vain, to reeducate them.

I swear this has been getting out of hand just lately. Mainly due to all the media attention the paedophile topic is getting I think.

Sitting on a fathers lap seems to be "frowned uppon" etc....

Or like in your case taking pictures of your kids. I mean what on Earth is going on? I'm glad I have hundreds if not thousands of pictures of me & my sister growing up...

I don't ever recall anyone ever giving my parents grief for it

What a bunch of ignorant morons...

some people are self righteous hypocritical pricks. no one has a problem with kids running around in swim wear on a beach, and no one has a problem with kids being photographed by women, but a man MUST be a pervert if he wants to take pictures of them.

nvm.

reply to post by 1littlewolf

It's hard to say for sure, since I know nothing about your tats(size & image). But sadly, it's possible that your tats were more of a deciding factor in these accusations, than your genitalia was.

I think that most people don't even realize they're doing it, but many still seem to automatically view someone with tats, as most likely being a criminal.


Much of our society still remains conditioned to believe that:

[color=FF7B61]Long Hair

[color=FF7B61]Beard

[color=FF7B61]Tattoos
[color=FF7B61]= Bad Guy

&

[color=7AFF7A]Well Groomed

[color=7AFF7A]Clean Shaven

[color=7AFF7A]Suit & Tie
[color=7AFF7A]= Good Guy

9 times out of 10, it's the guy in the suit that you should keep your eye on.

 

 

On the other hand, if I was a human-walrus in frilly purple tights, I would probably wanna make people look the other way too. Get their focus onto someone else.

coo coo cachoo

 

Off-Topic P.S. What is [WTB]?

Well written, SnF. Good entry.

As far as the story goes, I'll bet if you WERE female, and 200 lbs, taking pics, nothing would have been said. It's amazing when you think of the reasons for discrimination. Geez.

Good Luck in the contest.

reply to post by 1littlewolf


What a horrible woman! As i also have a little lady toddler of my own, this is the sort of thing im dreading as i just won't react in a nice way at all. I would never normally say this but i really hope the lady involved gets some really nasty karma heading her way - genital warts or similar!

I had the opposite reaction. Thankfully, people there notice red flags. Here in the US you can apparently molest children for decades, get a top job where you are around them constantly, molest them in the locker rooms, showers, your own home, and nobody ever notices.

I think instead of throwing such a fit, I would have appreciated the concern on their behalf and on behalf of all children, then called the children over to introduce them, set the onlookers straight in the matter, and enjoyed my day.

I actually would have taken a more litigious / discriminatory line with the lifeguard. I would have taken his photo, gotten his name and snapped pictures of all the other people using their cameras on the beach. This kind of crap just doesn't fly with me. God help them if someone every tried to pull that over me with my daughter.

IRM

I know where you're coming from, OP. I have a 10 year old daughter, and I'm fairly young myself. We get weird looks from people everywhere we go. I'm not sure what they're really thinking, but the idea has crossed my mind that they probably have no idea I'm her dad.

People are idiots. I guess the silver lining is knowing that if there was some pervert on the beach snapping pics of your kids these people would have prevented it.

I also have a son, he's approaching 2 years old.. He had a fall and we took him to the emergency room, the ER doc checked him thoroughly for signs of abuse. I'm kind of "fringe" looking too, so I deal with this alot. The bump on his head turned out to be just that, a bump on his head - and of course he has no other bruises or scars because, well, I love my kids and I'm not a violent person. At first I was really offended, but after thinking on it for a few minutes I guess it is in the best interest of kids everywhere. So I don't think the problem is with people being vigilant against this type of behavior, but their eagerness to jump to conclusions without observing or asking questions.

Anyway, your post reminded me of this.

www.hulu.com...

Originally posted by BrokenCircles

[color=FF7B61]Long Hair

[color=FF7B61]Beard

[color=FF7B61]Tattoos
[color=FF7B61]= Bad Guy

2.5/3 - I guess society will always see me this way. Oh well!

reply to post by 1littlewolf


Well the truth of the matter is, women are pedophiles too. Pedophilia knows no sexual limitation, women are just better better at hiding it than men are which is why you don't see them in the news as often. We had a case several years ago here in the U.S. where a teacher was having sex with her 12 year old male student and got pregnant by him and she was married.

Oh yes women can definately be pedos too, theyre just better at lying about it and hiding it as the female gender are professionals when it comes to telling lies. Not saying all women do this but theres more of them that do, than those that don't. Mental illness has no prejudice.

Was this today? Lucky bastard meanwhile I'm at work slavin away in the humidity while you're down at cottesloe with your kids. Well I guess in saying that you weren't so lucky afterall. What a pompous, ignorant, abnoxious cunnava thing!
I can understand how some people would be genuinely concerned for the kids sake but to approach it in this manner is appalling! I'm not sure I would of reacted so calmly (not that you did anyway haha) I'm sick of discrimination against fathers!
I've been through hell as a single dad with lawyers and courts etc etc. Blokes constantly get shafted no matter how loving a dedicated we are to our children.
Sorry to get slightly off topic I just get fired up on this subject, I'm extremely passionate about making changes to this aspect of the system.

Back on topic, dude just ignore all the ignoramuses, beat em at their own game. Dont let them get in the way of a father spending quality time with his kids and wanting to treasure that memory with a couple of photos.

P.S Here's to Summer in W.A!!!

When I was a single father raising my kids I never had that problem. I took my boys everywhere and never got too many odd looks. Sad how much the world had went downhill in 20 years.

I love my little sister to death and always will. I usually express that feeling with an attack called "1000 kisses". Next thing you know, she's the one chasing me through the house.

It's a wonderful thing to share bonds with people and even more so to express them (e.g., taking children to the beach and snapping away with the cam). On a different note, I am glad I came across your thread because I too could have reacted in anger (serves as a reflection). In the end, what matters to me most is that my sister maintains her state of happiness.

Everyone else can shove it! 凸(⊙▂⊙✖ )

（⌒▽⌒）jk...

im not allowed near parks by myself cos im a man. people dont understand that some men are just nice to children becuase they are children