I need advice guys ),:(getting over an ex)

Originally posted by lostangel818
reply to post by Unrealised

 

Thank you , i think im gonna have to give a call i dont wanna have another depression break down ./:

That's the way.

It doesn't make you weak if you reach out for a little help, it makes you strong for being able to see beyond pride, which is what stops most people from asking for some advice or help in the first place.


I called one of those hotlines when I was younger, and it wasn't a bad experience at all. I had a little bit of a cry, but they understood.


People, even complete strangers, can be very surprising when it comes to compassion.

take some time out
and start doing and enjoying the things you enjoyed before the relationship.

people make compromises when they get into relationships.
go back and find yourself. once you are happy within yourself...

"Love deeply and passionately.
You may get hurt, but it is the only way to life life completely"

UNFORTUNATE

Originally posted by dumboooo
UNFORTUNATELY this is not the right section, forum, or website to post such irrelevant crap on. of course its relevant to you, but do a bunch of conspiracy theorists really CARE about you and you're heart's problems? what is this world coming to...

Very nice

You handing out ropes and razors?

Wow... Some people.. Unbelievable.

reply to post by dumboooo


Well not that your answer deserves a response but actually ....YOU are the first person to respond here in a negative way. I think the name of this discussion board is RELATIONSHIPS so it seems like the right place to me.

This World is coming together and trying to help each other...except for maybe a few people like yourself

reply to post by lostangel818


you could just eat him?
syke
I feel you, i was engaged to the girl that in highschool, i chased for 4 years till i was 19 we finally set it off, being best friends for about 4 years before that, in a relationship for 3 years.
I took her son in as my own, and still see him as my boy today even though we don't see each other because she #ed by best friend, because i wanted her sober.

i know people are going to think the worst about her, being a mom and what not
but
well girls tend to cheat on me a lot with my friends, since i bring them around, and hey, if they;re a better match then her and I, then i drop the whole thing, but before i never did, i used to be real jealous, typical negative traits of a scorpio type of dude. but i gave them everything, her everything, did everything, i know what you mean

its almost been 2 years, and a year ago i went back to my hometown, and dated someone for a few months, it was awesome, great i loved it, straight jumped on it, we rushed, i went back to get my things (in california) and 3 days before my flight, she had to move to florida, for some complications, I couldnt at the time say i loved her or anything more then my previous ex, i see that right now my feelings are far greater then they are for my Big ex(the one i talked about first) i am over my big ex, and i miss the family, that we had, or i miss her son, but i did everything for her, and not for me
i since then, been trying to better myself, for years everytime i'd break up with someone, or they broke up with me, i would look for all my flaws, and etc work on them for the next one.
this time i havent been in a relationship or even had a quickie or none of that petty shiz for a full year, theres time i wish i had someone, or i hhave thoughts just to hook up with someone who i know i can but don't
i;m sort of messed up though
i feel like i need to pay a dogma off i guess, for all the things ive done etc, but now after a year, i try and hit the field, but i dont really know myself anymore and in my big ex relationship even though i was happy and all, i was happy for the wrong reason

my martial art master told me
:"your the most important person, more important then your children, then HER, then your mom, then your family, and your friends."
Putting them infront of you, is no way to live, since without you, you can't give them anything, you can't see them, hold them, hug them, to a sense they don't exist to you, don't take it to heart, not trying to conflict your beliefs, but be the best man you can, work hard, train, compete with yourself. be better then one second ago, so when the next person comes to your life, even if you had a bad attitude, your character devolpment will show how strong, and powerful you are, as well it will attract them none the less, no matter what you do, or don't do
people change, all the time, you can be married for 30 years, and still have a divorce, pass away though age. but an end of one thing, transfer that love/energy to another thing, and if you work on your foundation
that energy already with infinite potential, will be more suitable when it goes kinetic,
remember all the good times you've had, attract that and even better

dont pick your guy like a indecisive teenager, pick them like how people pick there cars, make your guidelines of who they are, not of how they look
because
in love
so many relationships end, because well. they like the eye candy, and if they eye candy is even sugar-free but still a little sweet. they fall for it, and get cavaties

not saying go for the ugliest dude, but time will heal
dont get stuck on the thought
"oh i miss him so much i love him, i cant be with out him"
instead
I love him, he'll always be a part of me,
and i will cherish those moments, he showed me something good, now i have a broader understanding of what i want

i love all my previous ex's
im, not in love with all them
but still would do w.e i could for them, as well as anyone in my life, (very passive, but you wouldnt be able to tell by looking)

im grateful for all the ones who broke my heart, because it showed me so much, pain, angst, fear, love, will, pride, secure., depressed, crazy, insane, lost, found, they teach us that in relationships, thats why we experience them.
you will not get over him as long as your focused on missing him
energy goes where attenion flows, and that process of thinking will show you how much you think you need him
i agree with the above post
kickboxing/boxing, something aerobic, working out makes you feel better, amazing actually
and you meet people, have fun, and lost bodily stress
sorry if i didnt help
just speaking my mind,
if you wanna chat or w.e
this goes to anyone [email protected]
or find me on facebook if you want
im open for all, even if you wanna troll, im game for it, i just like chatting lol
.

also
this is a community
so instead of being biased and what not
lets be a community, and actually unite, who cares what the post is about
we're here as members, if your about rage and shadows, then your either just a fear mongerer or...
i don't think you should be on a site like this in my opinion, just because if something big were to happen
and we were the ones who discovered it, and we had to step in and potentally save the world from w.e ET's, NWO, a safe zone etc then we would unite, would we not? or would we just try and push everyone away who helped us?

I'm just saying

its a conspiracy board, sure, filled with conspiracist we're all somewhat involved with our opinions or posts, rant's etc,
we're a conspiracy community. as far as im concerned your all friends that i haven't met physically, but none the less friends of mine

lol i also live in the 818

I think this whole thread reeeeeeks of conspiracy. Is there actually a girl out there who needs to cheer up or is there a ficticious "damsel in distress" thing going on here? Alien brainwashing campaign?! Subliminal programming? Either way, I don't care. I'm programmed and want to help the girl. I love girls.

Before i go to sleep , i just wanted to thank everyone who posted giving me advice ,It actually made me feel better .

Stop giving your power away! Love is a wonderful thing until it leaves you then - well, you know. Trust me, there will be another you will find you can love just as much. It feels like you;'re in a long, dark tunnel but just keep walking and you'll get to the other side.
Most of us have been through the same thing. It hurts like hell then one fine day you realize that you're ok.
Good luck and be patient, Nothing worth having or doing is worth rushing. Don't depend on someone else for your happiness. It's not fair to either of you.

Originally posted by lostangel818
I still cant get over my ex , he was my first on everything 、its been 8months and ,
I still feel like i love him ): he left me due to distance and other stuff . I just feel so depressed im hardly happy cause of him . I keep having dreams about him , i have had over 5 depression break downs ,and i feel like im gonna have another one. I dont know who to talk to about this with , i dont trust any of my friends,and i dont wanna tell any of my family members for advice . When he left me i was gonna commit suicide but something stopped me, i dint wanna make my mom suffer, i still think about dying.

So why don't you close the distance and go be with him? Obviously if it was that good he would have no problems with it. This is why people get married .

Bah, kill yourself over another person? Thats stupid. If you don't go marry him or be with him, find some other guy to have sex with. Best cure for a broken heart is finding another person to mess with!

My advice is, either go be with him and find a way to close the distance and make it work and maybe get married or just go find someone else.

All I can say is time heals. it took me 18 months.
I still feel a little sad when I see things that remind me of the best times.

best thing you can do is keep active.
do things that are intense. like sky diving even jogging.
something active that keeps you very busy.

Smile.. Thats all i can suggest,

like i cant give huge amounts of advice as everyone needs to deal with these things in there own way!

ignore anyone moaning at you.. at least your trying to talk to folk about it.


Hope things get better

reply to post by lostangel818


Up with the mood girl

I know it seems like there is no path what so ever right now.
But will you lose your whole life, the life you have been building up, your memories, feelings, passions, just because of one man?

The whole life is one long test, and we all have been through this, and I know some are harder than others.

But I know how the feeling is like, there is no words to describe it, and I feel for you.
When you feel depressed and alone, just stop for an min and think about all the others that are going through that exact same feeling as you do.

You are never alone friend
And if I was you, I would talk with your family about it. They always know best.

Originally posted by lostangel818
its been 8months and ,I still feel like i love him ):

Protip: Love does not exist.

Originally posted by Chamberf=6
reply to post by lostangel818

 

....they are a part of you now.


you will never truly forget them

I agree. I still think of my first love. She too broke my heart and left me feeling as if life was not worth living.....

BUT 30 years (yes 30) later I'm still here! I can tell you with complete honesty that the past 29 and 1/2 year have been well worth living.

I want to impress on the person who is contimplating suicide this thought:

How will your mother, father, siblings, and other loved one's react to your suicide?
Is it your intention to make the other people in your life, who you love, as miserable as you are.
What did THEY do to deserve the heartache your self inflicted death would cause?
By choosing to kill yourself you give this "ex", more importance than EVERYONE else who has loved and cared for you your entire life. Your "ex" came into your life and he chose to leave. He should be given only that much importance.
As far as you. You are the most important person in your life. This isn't conceit. This is what every mental health pro, self help pro, person like myself, and 12 step program will impress on you AND ITS TRUE!

Show him and show the world! Use this little tragedy, Which happens to thousands and thousands of people everyday. including I would venture to say most if not everyone on this forum, And make a kick ass life for yourself. I gaurentee you you will find someone out there that is perfect for you.
Or at least have unbelieveable tolerance and staying power like my wife HAHA!!

Take care of yourself first and always. Other will love and respect you.
And welcome to the Club!

OP please don't be too upset.

It is one of the hardest things to do in life, but you can do it.

Just remember you have tremendous value as a person.

Spend your time improving yourself, cleaning your home, fixing up broken things in it, working out, taking a karate class or a dance class, learning to cook, WHATEVER, just something to get your mind off of him while focusing every day on making yourself a better person.

You will soon find that life does indeed go on and that you can certainly survive.

If you need a friend to talk to, you can find one here, I'm sure of it. I'll be your friend. Send me a message any time.

Don't give up on yourself. You seem like a great person with a lot of good traits. People care. Don't let this get any worse than it already is. You can do this.

You can handle this.

reply to post by MathiasAndrew
[more

It didn't take me very long in life to see what relationships were and why they were so painful to get out of. You eat because you have needs. You eat to satisfy your hunger. But we don't decorate our "eating" with all these lovely beautiful lies n misconceptions( like this is my soul mate and marriage is the ultimate thing in life) like we do with relationships. Relationships exist because we have needs: physical and emotional, sexuality and companionship. That is all. Those are the only places where a relationship can bring fulfilment. If you're relying on a relationship for any more than that then you're headed towards doom. And many relationships really do turn out to be something ugly. This is because people don't understand the limitations of a relationship. It gets heavily decorated and when it comes down you can not walk out of it as gracefully as you walked into it.