Attention Women. Lets Give Them The Answers They Long For.

I have been in some interesting threads over the years on ATS, I have even created my own controversial thread about men and women. There has always been a deep separation between men and women, even here on ATS.

But never one that was willing to except the differences between men and women, and what both really want.

Even here where we express our deepest search for the truth, we still communicate with each other with bias, hurtful words, and sometimes anger and rage. Which usually gets out of control and no one actually takes anything from it.

A thread that is started by a man, usually winds up with his understanding of a hurtful relationship, and him having questions. The answers that he may get here vary, from, other men standing by him because they have been through something similar, and have been hurt, and women adding to the thread standing up for all women

IMHO, when asking these types of questions on a conspiracy website, the questions you may have alot of will be answered by a completely different type of women. Women (this is my opinion) that frequent this site are not your ordinary women.

Yes, some have different lives outside of ATS, but many of the women here have their hearts set on knowledge, truth, understanding, and hope. This type of women will not be the same women you will meet at a bar, so of course the responses will be different.

My being on this site, has shown me that I was not alone in looking for the truth, and I have since decided to pursue a relationship with someone that was also trying to do the same.

Men when you ask about something that confuses you, and get a response from a women here on ATS, its not going to relate to you on the outside, because there is a different mindset here. BTW, the reason that things may not always work out, and you not understanding may be that you subconsciously are aware that you are different, and that YES there are women out there that have sense, and want more, but you cant take that mentality to a bar/club/house party, etc,. But by being here, you know that those type of women are out there.

Women have the same difficulties as men do, especially those associated with living outside the box. Either we are persecuted for thinking this way, or belittled because women are not supposed to understand these things. I can even honestly say that some women that you may meet will act like they dont know anything, but secretly do, just not to have to deal with the ridicule.

Please no one take offense to what I am about to write, but I am sure that there are more lonely people here, then at most places. Not because we have no skills with those we are attracted to, we are just stronger than many others out there that blindly follow the group, while most of us here, are following that truth.

Women and men have the ability to make things work, we always have. What is happening to many of us, is that we have become comfortable in our own skin, and dont think that we should change, and we shouldnt.

If you are suffering whether alone or with someone else, its not always our faults, but the choices that we make.

I always think of it this way. For the amount of men on ATS, and the amount of women, there are probably 10,000 of each, looking for love, and not finding it. I always wonder if one day, I meet someone who happens to be a member, how funny that would be. I know that the men that I interact with here (through threads, and posts) that they are truly some good men out there, that want love, and support, and there are just as many women.

So, I say lets learn to be honest with each other. Men, if you want answers from women that are like minded then this is the place (relationships BTS). Just dont think that you are going to find the typical answers, I am sure that can be found on a dating website.

Instead of us sharing what separates us, lets share what makes us the same. And as far as I am concerned being on ATS makes many of us the same... lets start there

Peace, NRE.

In my experience there are no real differences between men and women. (Except the obvious physical differences)

I know many will dispute this, but hear me out..

Men and women are all in the same emotional range - despite what Cosmo might tell you. On a general level, we all want the same things, with minor variances and differences of opinion. On a fundamental level, we all just want someone that shares our views (to a point) and love us without reservation. The range of difference between men and women is the same exact chart we would use to measure the range of difference in men or women alone. Women aren't better at communicating and men aren't better at fixing cars - it's just that we've all settled into this image that has been projected onto us.. So far settled in, in fact, that at first glance this is reality.

The problem isn't our actual differences, but our perceived differences. Women and men are portrayed as such different creatures in our every day lives that we build up walls based on MARKETING. Anyone who truly knows their significant other can attest to this.

If you're alone it's by choice. Even if it doesn't feel like a choice it is. Maybe you are too shy (because you've been programmed to believe women are mythical creatures like unicorns or men are pig-headed cavemen) or maybe your standards are unreasonably high. Maybe you are looking for a combination of traits that is very rare. Maybe you prefer to be alone (90% of the time).

As far as women on ATS being different from women in the real world.. I don't know if I agree with that. Everyone wants to know the truth, we're just all in various stages of acceptance. Some of us carry bias based on the things we've been exposed to in our past. Some of us have closed ourselves so completely that all we can see are our differences. Ultimately we are all very similar creatures, and when you find one little way to relate to a person it opens the proverbial floodgates to find more and more similarities. Sit down and have a conversation with your worst enemy, and you'll find you aren't so different.

Anyway, just my 2¢ on this topic. My better half had no idea 99% of the topics you might find on ATS ever existed when we first met, now she rocks the tin foil hat with me. People are willing to change their fundamental beliefs for love - I think that says something profound about what's REALLY important in this life.


Peace!

Good post. As a female on here, I have to say that I don't know too many of my friends who are interested in reading what's on this website. We are different. Often, we are lonely because of it.

Thankfully I married a guy who is as different as I am.

If any female member ever wants to ask, "Why do guys do...[insert here]?", I'll be glad to answer it.

Here's the simple primer though...

In an argument, we only want one thing....for it to be over, and life to get back to normal. Any guy who wants to "win" an argument (with a woman), is acting like a girl. For us, "winning" is getting back to normal.

"I don't know" is never an appropriate answer to ANY question a guy asks, also see "Whatever you want" which we sense as an impending trap...we are simple...not stupid. Make a decision, or accept the consequences of us actually doing what we like...you do NOT reserve the right to then bitch about it later if you were asked...

Unless you are in physical duress, do NOT ask us to carry your purse. Might as well throw a dress on us and spritz us with perfume while you're at it.

When in doubt, we always want steak for dinner.

With all that in mind, please feel free to ask!

reply to post by Gazrok


You don't speak for me.

Namaste.

Originally posted by ErgoTheConfusion
reply to post by Gazrok

 

You don't speak for me.

Namaste.

Thank god for that or he might be the kind of weiner that puts namaste at the end of posts.

We all like a good hot meal.
We all like a good hug once and a while.
We all like to have our voices heard. Some less, some more.
We all like to laugh.

Yeah we are all basically the same.

reply to post by FEDec


Namaste.

reply to post by FEDec




Ok,that's more like it!

reply to post by ErgoTheConfusion


( and I'll amend that I only speak for my idea of the stereotypical male...)

Does that calm your inner spirit or something?

reply to post by Gazrok


I stated my perspective simply, just as you stated yours in your own way. No calming necessary.

Namaste.

You two are bickering like girls.

If it makes you feel any better I think you're both pretty!

reply to post by TinkerHaus

I can only guess by the lack of questions that women have fully figured us out....admittedly, not a difficult task...

Now, if we could only understand them... Actually, years of marriage and a long appreciation of the gender has certainly given me more insight over the years.

Some keys:

1) LISTEN to them

2) Bitching doesn't necessarily mean they want you to SOLVE the problem...they could just be venting...up to you to determine which though.

3) Show them you think about them and appreciate them (and not just on holidays). A little goes a LONG way here. You give a gal flowers on a day just because...and after she says, "What did you do wrong?", she'll then really appreciate it...for example.

4) Realize they are different. Do not expect them to react to something like a man would.

5) Don't be a doormat. Be kind, be considerate, but if you are a complete doormat, it's like repellent for females. On things that really matter, stand your ground.

Men, if you want answers from women that are like minded then this is the place

I'll bite.

Q - What is with the whole deal of not deciding on what to eat on a given night? In most cases, the guy is not the picky one here...yet you'll say wherever we want to go, then make a face when we suggest it, but if we then go to another choice...oh no, now we suddenly WANT to go there and no place else, and we're forcing you to go... What gives with that?

reply to post by NoRegretsEver


Interesting thread NRE but I don't think anybody has any actual questions, I think it's all pretty much known and everybody just plays along, or goes along......I had some actual questions I didn't know once long ago, but sorry to say I forgot them.....If I remember them I will post them. But to tell you the truth I don't think the questions or the answers matter all that much. But in the end I think I know what it is and all about. Whats that saying? When it happens, it happens....or something like that.

What makes us the same, um....I got one, were all stuck at the gate a foot away from the breach, all's we need is a little push and we will fall trough.

Anyways I'll keep one of my eyes on this thread, who knows it might get interesting.

I have a question
Partner gets up after a lie in, I'm downstairs washing up at the sink. I can feel him sneaking towards me. I'm imagining kisses to my neck, sexy whispers in my ear.
Compliments on how I smell and the pretty clothes I'm wearing.
I got......
Genital rub in the middle of my back with the grunt "do you fancy a bit?"

So my question is
what changes nice complementary, attentive man into Grunt the gorilla?

Would an ATS man treat me in the same way?

reply to post by sussy


Sounds like you have no problems whatsoever.

Second.

Originally posted by sussy
Would an ATS man treat me in the same way?

No. He'd do the same thing but he'd be wearing a Vendetta mask.

It's just in the wiring. Talk to your man about it. He probably thought he WAS paying you a compliment. You excite him.

Btw, Gaz is wrong. We want ribs, not steak.

Originally posted by sussy
I have a question
Partner gets up after a lie in, I'm downstairs washing up at the sink. I can feel him sneaking towards me. I'm imagining kisses to my neck, sexy whispers in my ear.
Compliments on how I smell and the pretty clothes I'm wearing.
I got......
Genital rub in the middle of my back with the grunt "do you fancy a bit?"

So my question is
what changes nice complementary, attentive man into Grunt the gorilla?

Would an ATS man treat me in the same way?

*snickers*
Yes indeed! Familiarity breeds impromptu genital rubbing, with little to no warning It's amazing how quickly the well-thought-out compliments and sexy whispers go by the wayside Best advice for you? Bring your sense of humor with you into the bedroom/bathroom, leave the rest at the door

reply to post by galadofwarthethird


You obviously haven't fully trained him that you like a little bit of romance before going right to rubbing up on you. Men like it laid out for them...just tell him what you like, and he'll oblige you, especially if it gets him what he wants.

Obviously, you must have responded well to this behavior previously, or he wouldn't be trying it again...

Originally posted by Gazrok
reply to post by galadofwarthethird

 

You obviously haven't fully trained him that you like a little bit of romance before going right to rubbing up on you.

Men like it laid out for them...just tell him what you like, and he'll oblige you, especially if it gets him what he wants.

Obviously, you must have responded well to this behavior previously, or he wouldn't be trying it again...

hmmm..was that reply meant for sussy? Think you may have clicked on wrong post..because it makes no sense as a reply to galadofwarthethird.

I have done that more than once on here..

reply to post by Gazrok


Error, Error, Error, Error, Error......Does not compute. Error....Main system shutting down.

System ID, up and running... Target spotted, Commencing hostilities.....Destroy, Destroy, Annihilate.

Cats says....All your base are belong to us.... Resistance is futile.