12 Year Old Uses Techniques From Brazilian Jiu Jitsu Training Camp To Stop Bully

I'll state a second reason why tattle-telling is not working. Most of the bullying that is happening today is group based and passive-aggressive. The children get the adults to do the bullying for them. They form a story and then go to the teacher or principle and present a consolidated front against another student. In a 3-1 type of scenario the adult has no choice but to believe the lie and punish the other student. I have seen this happen time and time again where good kids are punished by the school for things that they never said or did. The schools have zero tolerance policies and so every 'crime' is treated like a capital offense and these kids are having permanent marks on their records preventing them from getting scholarships, from getting in to private school, and preventing them from getting in their colleges of choice.

reply to post by lostsock


That's madness!

I'd would have told the principal to sort the matter out or I'd be keying him across the face

I don't advocate violence but I wouldn't, as a parent, allow my child to become physically scared or worse due to some idiot not doing his job properly.

Originally posted by Death_Kron
That's madness!

I'd would have told the principal to sort the matter out or I'd be keying him across the face

I don't advocate violence but I wouldn't, as a parent, allow my child to become physically scared or worse due to some idiot not doing his job properly.

I could fill a thread with stories of good kids being beaten up, injured, and (as I said above) passive aggressively tormented and the teachers and principals doing absolutely nothing about it. That is why I am so annoyed when I hear someone come in and tell us that self-defense never solves anything. Its very often the only thing that brings about resolution.

reply to post by josh2009s


How long have you been out of school and do you have children?

I do, a daughter, who was bullied for a while by another girl at school. I told her that if she ever hits you, punch her in the face and don't stop till someone pulls you off her, I'll deal with the teachers and the school. Why, because I had told the teachers and the principal about it. Even went to the other kids parents. It didn't stop it. So I told her enough, if the kid bothers you once more defend yourself and don't worry about it. I taught her some basic stuff to fight if she needed to.

The other little girl was making fun of her in line one day and and pushed her. My daughter shoved her very hard back and said, "you put your hands on me again and I'll break your nose. Wanna try your luck? " That ended it all, the other kid never bothered her again. She didn't have to resort to violence because the other little girl saw strength and knew my daughter was serious. But if she needed to, she was ready to.

The school systems, at least where I live have no answer for bullying. Despite all the rhetoric about anti bullying campaigns and what not, they are powerless to do anything. That's just the way it is. You live in Utopia if you believe that the school systems can and will do anything about it.

Originally posted by ararisq

Originally posted by josh2009s
I am trying to find a slight amount of your post that makes sense, and none of it does. You are throwing out words assuming that you are correct when, indeed, there is no correlation. Post something something factual and non make-believe and we continue this debate.

I'll try to outline this for you so you can understand:

1) Your premise is that a person young or old should never defend themselves because violence cannot be solved with more violence.

2) You suggest by that statement that self-defense is violence and to be avoided.

3) Multiple people are telling you that this did not work in practice for them and does not work depending on where you live and what school system you go to.

4) You ignore all other evidence and repeatedly state that your textbook based assertion is right and everyone else's real-life experience is wrong.

Do you understand now? You are wrong. Accept it and move on.

1) I did not say someone should never defend themselves.

2) Refer to number 1.

3) As I shared in a prior post, it can work. But, you must try it first.

4) Nonsense. I didn't tell anyone they were wrong. I just further explained why violent actions have many more consequences than non-violent.



I guess I don't understand why I am being flamed for sharing my side of the story. I have not taken an aggressive stance, nor will I. If developing counterpoints is a crime, than I need to get out of the Country.

reply to post by ararisq


Self defence was the only thing at school that stopped me being an endless target, in fact it actually made me become a respected peer. I was the "smart one" but the smart one people wouldn't take the piss out of anymore...

reply to post by GAOTU789


I am 19, and have been out of school since May, 2009.

Originally posted by josh2009s
1) I did not say someone should never defend themselves.

Effectively you did, I'm sure you mentioned something along the lines of "telling a teacher" first or words to that effect.

It's pretty hard to inform a teacher about someone beating you in the face when your being beaten in the face...

Originally posted by Death_Kron

Originally posted by josh2009s
1) I did not say someone should never defend themselves.

Effectively you did, I'm sure you mentioned something along the lines of "telling a teacher" first or words to that effect.

It's pretty hard to inform a teacher about someone beating you in the face when your being beaten in the face...

But, in fact, I didn't. And as for telling the teacher, I sure did say that. I did not, however, say that the kid should have waited to tell until he got punched.

Originally posted by josh2009s
But, in fact, I didn't. And as for telling the teacher, I sure did say that. I did not, however, say that the kid should have waited to tell until he got punched.

Your missing the complete dynamics of said situation, how exactly could the poor lad tell a teacher before he was punched?

Which leads back to the point the majority of people in this thread have already made, if your going to be punched then you defend yourself...

ETA:

Your comment was:

He should have told the school faculty like any normal kid would do.

How can the lad do that before he was punched? Should he just stand there, enjoy a crack and then go tell the teachers?

Originally posted by josh2009s
I guess I don't understand why I am being flamed for sharing my side of the story. I have not taken an aggressive stance, nor will I. If developing counterpoints is a crime, than I need to get out of the Country.

I'm not flaming you, I am disagreeing with you. You are being disagreed with because this is what you said as the first response to this thread:

What's the kid gonna do when the bully brings a gun to schools and slaughters him and many others?

and then:

Violence is no way to combat violence. The bully is probably a bully because he was exposed to violence in his youth. People need to get there mind out of the gutters with this violence crap. This is the reason we have wars.

You pretty clearly put yourself in the camp that self-defense (as in this case) was wrong and was in the form of violence - that it will just escalate to the bully bringing a gun and shooting him.

You then went on to explain that he should have told a teacher instead of defending himself.

If that isn't what you meant and I am taking you out of context then help me out here - but I'm certainly not alone in interpreting it that way.

reply to post by GAOTU789


Perhaps in lieu of your child's safety you can join the school board or PTA.

Originally posted by josh2009s
I am 19, and have been out of school since May, 2009.

Well I called it. The schools turn out liberals and real life turns out conservatives. Give it 15 more years and when you have children and they are being bullied and the school doesn't respond to it and it keeps happening you'll see what the rest of us mean.

Originally posted by josh2009s
reply to post by Death_Kron

 

He should have told the school faculty like any normal kid would do.

Except this is reality....Telling does not always help... Did you not read the article? Clearly adults knew about it yet it still continued.

Originally posted by josh2009s
Perhaps in lieu of your child's safety you can join the school board or PTA.

Did that as well. When we got in and saw ALL of the other events going on we ended up taking our child out of school completely. The school was a disaster. In fact of the last 15 people on the PTA all but 4 have taken their children out of the system.

Originally posted by gimme_some_truth

Originally posted by josh2009s
reply to post by Death_Kron

 

He should have told the school faculty like any normal kid would do.

Except this is reality....Telling does not always help... Did you not read the article? Clearly adults knew about it yet it still continued.

Sorry gimme, you seen that wasn't my response

This is also taken from the article:

It's back-to-school time all over the country. For kids that get picked on, it's a return to a horror zone. Experts say that more than 150,000 children miss school every day because they are afraid of being bullied. More than half of all schoolchildren have witnessed a bullying incident and three of every four students say bullying is a problem at their school.



The bulk of bullying occurs from the fourth through the eighth grades, although it can continue through high school and even in the workplace. Bullying is intimidation or domination toward someone perceived as weaker, a way to establish superiority through coercion or force. The emotional scars are often worse than the physical beatings, and victims of bullying often become depressed and do poorly in school. Bullying can even lead to suicide.

By the way, what I quoted in the original post is only a fraction of the full article. Click the source link and read the entire article for more details.

Originally posted by ararisq

Originally posted by josh2009s
I guess I don't understand why I am being flamed for sharing my side of the story. I have not taken an aggressive stance, nor will I. If developing counterpoints is a crime, than I need to get out of the Country.

I'm not flaming you, I am disagreeing with you. You are being disagreed with because this is what you said as the first response to this thread:

What's the kid gonna do when the bully brings a gun to schools and slaughters him and many others?

and then:

Violence is no way to combat violence. The bully is probably a bully because he was exposed to violence in his youth. People need to get there mind out of the gutters with this violence crap. This is the reason we have wars.

You pretty clearly put yourself in the camp that self-defense (as in this case) was wrong and was in the form of violence - that it will just escalate to the bully bringing a gun and shooting him.

You then went on to explain that he should have told a teacher instead of defending himself.

If that isn't what you meant and I am taking you out of context then help me out here - but I'm certainly not alone in interpreting it that way.

In this case, yes, he should have told the teachers when it first started happening instead of waiting till he had to use violent force to defend himself. As for the bully bringing a gun to school, it has happened, and will most likely happen again as long as violence continues to breed violence. I do not know for a fact that the bully will bring a gun to school. But it is an example that we all understand, and we all need to work at to prevent. Sorry for any misunderstanding on my behalf.

Originally posted by josh2009s
In this case, yes, he should have told the teachers when it first started happening instead of waiting till he had to use violent force to defend himself. As for the bully bringing a gun to school, it has happened, and will most likely happen again as long as violence continues to breed violence. I do not know for a fact that the bully will bring a gun to school. But it is an example that we all understand, and we all need to work at to prevent. Sorry for any misunderstanding on my behalf.

Even if he did tell the teachers in the first instance, all that would have done in all probability is cause more problems. Your still distracting from the point you made about self defence, please address that. Your implying that it's wrong for a child to physically defend themselves against a bully?

reply to post by Death_Kron


I don't know what you do not understand. I DID NOT SAY THAT. I DID NOT SAY THAT. I DID NOT SAY THAT. Understand?