Blood On My Shirt - Where Are the Real Men At?

Originally posted by Exuberant1
reply to post by HolographicPrincipal

 

He makes more sense than you do.

You seem to be confused here.

What he is describing is the ways things are - he is letting you know why women should not expect men to come rushing to their aid.

When he speaks about power, he clearly mentioned that he was speaking about RAW physical power - not what feminist agitprop regards as power.

There is a difference between actual power and the power of - for example - a speech, or an idea.

Deal with it lady.

I'm going to have to agree with this.

On average, men are significantly stronger than women physically.

If you see a woman attempting to physically protect someone, while a man sits and watches; something is wrong with that situation.

Gender roles existed (and still do to some degree) for a reason. On average, men are naturally better at certain things, while women are naturally better at other things.

These are not my opinions, they are facts based on psychology/chemistry/biology.

However, it is my opinion , that straying away from gender roles has been a greater detriment to our society than people would like to admit.

reply to post by JPhish


Your statement differs from the post you are agreeing with. For clarity's sake, your referenced post is reinterpreting another post, which is misconstruing statements from yet another post.

Originally posted by petrus4
This is why I have deliberately avoided even attempting to learn any form of martial art. There are far too many people within contemporary society, who I would not be able to resist the temptation to use it on.

As for why it keeps happening; it happens because between 4-7% of the human population are psychopaths. They are literally demons in human form. They look like us, and sound like us, but they are not us. They don't feel pity, remorse, or empathy; sometimes they don't even feel fear.

Our reaction to them should be to identify them, expose them, and then euthanise them like the sick animals they are. Instead, however, we allow them to become our rulers, and the literal architects of our society.

The result of this, is the world you see before you.

edit on 17-8-2011 by petrus4 because: (no reason given)

Speaking as one of the soon to be euthanized... I have Anti-Social Personality Disorder, hence apparently, I'm a "sociopath". No, I generally don't feel remorse, pity, or much of anything really. I also am in a committed marriage, am working towards being a teacher, have friends, and am generally quite social. The difference between having rather vicious impulses and actually acting on them is VAST. With education and a bit of willpower, one can overcome most difficulties. Reactionary prats who try and call for a witch hunt to rid the world of you sound a great deal more maladjusted than I am. *grins* Which really takes some doing!

reply to post by LifeIsEnergy


What you did for that girl and those women was incredibly brave, i believe you did
the right thing. I also think you scared the # out of that man and made him think
twice in the future about bullying and attacking those weaker than himself.
Kudos S/F.

I also want to add that men that attack women and children who are clearly
weaker than themselves are miserable sods with a weak mentality and the
problem is not other people it's them.
Also, i feel the reason most people won't respond to these situations is due
to the fear of retribution and threat of lawsuits. The world has become a very
wimpy place unfortunately.

I've been a member for awhile..never posted,just read,absorb,nod or laugh depending on the tone of opinionated responses given to a topic.I have read nearly this entire thread,and I am not laughing.And since so many are throwing down personal opinion,I may as well too.

FIRST-None of this unwillingness to 'step in' on behalf of another is a result of a decline in the our male population's masculinity and potency. It is nothing to do with gender. It is a sign of societal conditioning,and a fear of consequences.The moment you step into the fray,you risk all sorts of possible inconveniences..and nobody wants that,now do they.Me? I watch and listen,carefully,before making the decision whether or not to stand up. If I saw ANYone beating down a child/young adult/adolescent in the street,I'd step to it without hesitation,damn the consequences.Not all of us have it within ourselves to risk personal harm.Fear keeps people rooted to the spot,nothing more,nothing less.I could call ANYone who doesn't step up a coward..gender aside.That is my opinion,and I honestly don't buy any excuses for why people don't.We have all witnessed public beatings etc..We all can relate stories,those of us who have been around awhile at any rate.Do I step up? You bet. Have,many times.Will again if called to it.I am of the school of thought that if you see a wrong and can right it,do it.We are our brother's keeper kinda thing.But obviously,that's just me..We each make our own choices based on what lives,or doesn't,inside us.

SECOND-To the OP,well done,and thank you.Because of what you and those two women did,that young lady knows beyond doubt that there ARE still flesh and blood saviors out there,and that gives her a whole different perspective,let's her know that there is still good in this world,people who care enough to be there to prove that his treatment of her is unacceptable and CAN be stopped,and perhaps that is enough to give her the courage to choose to fight for herself and live on to see better days in her life..a life barely begun and full of promise and opportunity.So the next time any of you see something like that go down,step up.Break the cycle of fear and complacency. Oh,and do have a nice day.

"Out between ides of right doing and wrong doing there is a field. I will meet you there."-Rumi

reply to post by Phenomium


WHOOOOOOOOOOA NELLY

You miss understood me.

I DO know some women that can handle themselves. My wife being one.

those of us that are "old school southern/ texan" do our best to raise strong women.

Are there some mindless, mouthy women? oh yeah. their are some actual ball buster's too that can meet a man head on as well.

Sometimes, they just need an "equalizer"

Yea,sometimes,an "equalizer" is ALL they need.

Big old burly guy has his lady bent over her car..she's trying to leave,he won't let her.Yelling in her face,fist cocked back. I step out into the middle of the street and tell him "You wanna hit a woman? Take ME on!"..Dude turns and stares at me,dumbstruck,unable to move..It gives the girl that heartbeat of time she needs to get into her car and get away from him. Slack jawed,he watches her speed off and turn the corner,looks back at me,thinking,calculating his options etc.,then he throws his hands up,turns and walks away shaking his oafish head. I think he learned something that day,too.

I'm not big,I'm not bad,but there is a passion or fire that burns in me that throws off energy at times that makes people pause. And sometimes,that by itself,is enough.

BTW? I was raised in the South..maybe that does make a difference..

For those who advocate not stepping in to help, from the perspective of someone with experience in this situation.

For the women who are getting harmed, what they KNOW for FACT is that when someone steps in to help them, they may be "safe" for the moment, but as soon as she is alone with said creep again he WILL make sure she pays intensely. She knows that her spouse/boyfriend will blame her for someone stepping in to help her, and that in the long run she will be worse off.

It is so psychologically hard to get away from an abusive relationship, even when a woman wants to, the situation conspires against her attempts to get away. She becomes "brainwashed" into believing that it is all her fault, that she deserved what she got, finances conspire to keep her stuck, and so much more.

So yes, in the moment these woman will want help so very much, but also they will be so fearful of the reaction of their spouse/boyfriend to the point of "proving her love" by protecting him from another trying to protect her.

I think, that unless you do a lot of reading on the subject or have been exposed in your own life to such a situation that it is very easy to look down upon and blame the woman for the situation. I can only ask that those of you who do not understand why a woman would be this way, that you take a little time to do some research.

These women DO want help, they just don't know how to go about it, and many times they believe their creep of a spouse/boyfriend and believe they deserve the beating of their life, when they don't.

Women have been killed by their spouses/boyfriends for trying to get away, trying to get help, or even when someone steps in to help without her asking. Chances are, if you have seen a woman in such a situation and tried to help, she may have then later been beaten to within an inch of her life for just the fact that someone else tried to help her. Though I do not advocate not helping at all. I myself am just not always sure what the best thing to do is.

I know once I was driving to the store and saw a man hitting on a woman at a bus stop, she was trying to get away from him, but he was holding onto her hair and just hitting her in the face. I pulled to the curb and yelled at her "get in", the man was shocked and let go and the woman jumped in my car. We sped away with her crying and thanking me. I dropped her off at the police station. I don't know what then took place after that, perhaps she went back to him. I would say probably. But I saw several people at the bus stop just watching, or with their back turned ignoring the situation, and MANY people were driving by ignoring what they saw. I just couldn't.

The more people that stand around and pretend that what is taking place is "OK" the more that these types of men will believe that what they are doing is acceptable, and the more women will also believe that it is acceptable. We do need to step in every single time we see this taking place, and eventually people will start to understand that it is not acceptable behavior.

Harm None
Peace

I completely agree with you wacking that jerk in the face with a bottle. I can only pray that if I wasn't around to protect my daughter, someone would step in and help her in a situation like that.

reply to post by gabby2011


Thank you. Sometimes it's difficult to relate my experiences in a public way but, I think if more people knew what's going on inside the mind of an abused woman it would become easier to understand our motives. There were a few times that I did defend my abuser, because I knew if I didn't, things would only escalate further when we were alone.

reply to post by tangonine


That sounds eerily similar to the relationship I was in. In the beginning and for some time after our children were born, things were good. However, drugs and alcohol turned him into a monster. Had I seen any signs of this prior, I would have left in a heartbeat.

I am married now, to a wonderful man, who feels the same way you do. It took some time for me to open up to him and actually trust he wouldn't hurt me too but, I'm glad I did. Otherwise I might not know what a real loving relationship was like, and to see the way he loves my children as his own is one of the best feelings in the world. I'm sure your wife feels the same.

reply to post by LifeIsEnergy


Dear OP:

What would have happened if the guy had pulled out a gun and shot you?

My perspective: My prime directive is the safety of me and my family. If you choose to attack me or my family you are probably committing suicide.

On the other hand, I am the sole source of income for my family. I have a duty TO MY FAMILY not to put that in jeapordy. If I witness an assault as you described, the risks of lawsuit, jail time, etc if I intervene are too great. I will call 911, be a good witness, and take good mental notes.

reply to post by dbarnhart


By the time the Cops actually showed up that girl may have been beaten so
badly she may have ended up brain dead. I believe that when your Instincts
kick in and tell you to do something, then do it. It's like a higher part of yourself
and it know's what your mind is unaware of, particularily in life death situations.

reply to post by awareness10


Alright discussion, but this story is fiction. Everyone getting all worked up over someone's fictional Mary Sue moment.

Originally posted by ScRuFFy63

Originally posted by LifeIsEnergy
Blood On My Shirt
While the parents are so busy playing mind games with each other; so busy trying to one-up each other, what is happening to their kids and to our future?

edit on 17-8-2011 by LifeIsEnergy because: (no reason given)

Not to trivialize your whole post but this line really stood out to me. I could write a three page essay on that sentence alone. Very insightful post.

I agree 150% with this, it is my biggest complaint about society today, period!! The worst part is that it makes it so much more difficult for those of us who want to raise compassionate and morally sound members of humanity. Our children are constantly comparing us to "so&so's" parents and giving us a lot of 'attitude' , making sure we know just how horribly strict and unfair we are. Just this weekend my 15 year old said to my husband and I, "do you even know how oppressive you guys are?"

It broke our hearts! What are we to do?!

reply to post by Exuberant1


Judgemental much??

-First off, we did call an ambulance.

-Secondly, we stayed with him till he was home-IE, after being grilled by the police for an hour and after the paramedics had looked him over and gave him the all clear.

My point, the part you missed, was that even if you are trying to help someone it can back fire.

reply to post by czerro


This happens on a daily basis
to women all the time, it's no fairy tale sorry to burst your solitude bubble. This stuff
is taking place as i type. I know, it's hard for some men who wouldn't lift a finger to do
squat for their own mother sister neice wife or daughter, and thats sad. But this is affecting
people which is what this thread was created for... to remind people like yourself it really
happens in waking life, not just violent video games and nightmares.

when I was still in my teens ((45 now))) two friends and there sister were with me and we were walking downtown .
now this was a small town and it was way back in the early 80ds > But even small towns have spots were the trouble makers hang > anyway we were walking past the poolhall were the trouble makers hang and i tell my friends to just keep walking we will be fine 3 blacks walk out looking at us by that time were a block down the street so they just stand there .
anyway the guys Sister turns around and walks BACK!!!!! The blacks are just about raping her in the street .((yes i do meen RAPING)Anyway im like now we have to go back and save this stupid girl ((15 or so))
well we or should i say I distracted the black guys and telling her to RUN figering as soon as she does i am .
finly my two friends run off shes still just standing THERE off to the side and im facing 3 guys by my self .
Finly im like the heck with it and WALK away (to pissed to run by this point lol))
anyway the next daY SHE says she has to go back because they told her they would come get her if she didnt???
like they ever came in our part of town we would have 50 guys out thyere in two mints and i told her so still she says shes has to go back.
WOMAN you wnated EQUILTY so you made it to ware if a man even LOOKS at you thye wrong way hes jailed and then GO to the violant men who will harm you for REAL then cry about were the real men are??
you made your bed now lay in it.
I wont help you i wont TOUCH uyopu as you MORE of a threat to me then ANY thug

reply to post by xxcalbier


Sure. Blame it all on equality.."I won't help you cuz you're a bigger threat to me than any thug."

Why not be honest and say I won't help you,or ANYone cuz I'm mad cuz some thrill seeking girl child wouldn't listen to me once a long time ago and I can't get over it and so ALL women are the devil and need a good whoopin'!

Good grief.

I know real men. I married one. I pray to whatever entity might be out there to listen to such things as prayers for the safety of all the real men,AND women,serving our country,voluntarily,both here in America and over seas in ugly foreign places,as well as the real men,AND women,living day to day lives right here who DO put themselves in harms way on behalf of others,no questions asked. Believe it or not,there are still good and valorous people in this world. If I saw you getting kicked,even if I knew it was you,after what you said up there,I'd still try and help you get free. Why? Because I'm better than that,and unless you are on a random killing spree,no one deserves to be beaten down in the streets or elsewhere,especially a young person..not even you.

You are not one of us. I get it. To me,people like you are just another wasted effort in a meat suit. Cheers.

Originally posted by Thunder heart woman

Originally posted by mnmcandiez
reply to post by LifeIsEnergy

 

people are too into themselves to help others

i don't think men care about "being a man" anymore

This is the truth. I have never seen a more lazy and complacent generation of young men and women in my life. Give them an iphone with hundreds of apps and they need nothing else much in life. They said that the 70's was the me generation but I think they got that wrong. This generation is the ME myself and I generation.

It's not really fair to say there are no real men out there, because there are good men who love their families and will do anything for them. But in general, stick a new shiny toy in front of someone and they don't have time to notice much of anything else.

Ah, but that's exactly the way we are being programmed, it's cultural manipulation on a massive scale.
Shiny toys, football, & beer for the men & pink fluffy pop idol stuff for the women.
Who cares about the latest war, i've got my new ipad, so i'm o.k.
We have to BREAK THE PROGRAM & just be OURSELVES & not some fake idealistic pseudo person.
There, i've procrastinated now.
i feel much better.