Should marriage licenses expire?

This question has been nagging on my mind recently. I'm not sure if it's ever been discussed yet, so if there's a thread where it's already being discussed, maybe we could add the link to this thread.

Anyways, marriage licenses are the only licenses that never expire. They can only be terminated.

Wouldn't it be easier if they expired after 5-7 years instead of being permanent?

Imagine:
Everyone would have to go to court to prove that they wanted it renewed. Wouldn't it be easier to prove that you still loved each other instead of proving that you weren't compatible anymore?

The state you were married in would send you a notice reminding you that your license was getting ready to expire and that you either needed to schedule a hearing to discuss why it should be renewed, or send them an allocated list of possessions and property that would be distributed equally amongst yourselves by monetary value. Anything being argued over would be on a separate list and dealt with at a mediation hearing.

The license wouldn't be an individual license, but would have to incorporate both people. When applying, each person would have to provide a list of all of their property and possessions, which would be kept on record. Upon approval of the license, the couple would also have to sign a prenup. After all, marriage should be about love and not how much you can acquire by the expiration date.

Since this idea is just in the infancy stage, I'd appreciate it if the discussion could exclude the topic of children (no pun intended). But as an aside, I'd like to say that I believe that you should also have to have a license to have children, but that's for an entirely different discussion.

So, what do you think about this? It would certainly end the career of divorce attorneys. Expiring marriage licenses would also abolish the idea people have once married thinking "I've got them now, so I can just let myself go now and it won't matter."

Can anyone list any other pros or cons for this idea?

(By the way, I'm not married and I'm really not sure if I'd ever get married anyways. I just wanted to discuss this idea.)

I like that idea! Renew if both parties agree.... yep makes sense to me.

reply to post by Soldier of God


Thank you! I thought it was an "out there" idea, but if more people really think about it, it makes the most sense.

the idea of marriage is that it is a union of 2 people for life... yeah sometimes it doesnt work, but your proposal kind of defeats the whole point of getting married in the first place..

Originally posted by Afterthought

The state you were married in would send you a notice reminding you that your license was getting ready to expire and that you either needed to schedule a hearing to discuss why it should be renewed, or send them an allocated list of possessions and property that would be distributed equally amongst yourselves by monetary value. Anything being argued over would be on a separate list and dealt with at a mediation hearing.

The license wouldn't be an individual license, but would have to incorporate both people. When applying, each person would have to provide a list of all of their property and possessions, which would be kept on record. Upon approval of the license, the couple would also have to sign a prenup. After all, marriage should be about love and not how much you can acquire by the expiration date.


Can anyone list any other pros or cons for this idea?

edit on 27-6-2011 by Afterthought because: Mediation hearing

Sounds like an invasion of privacy and a needless thing to do. We have divorce courts for a reason and would still need them even with expiration dates on marriage licenses. Some couples don't wait 5-7 years to get divorced.

More government in our every day lives? No thank you.

reply to post by Misterlondon


I completely agree with your comment. My parents are still married and still go on dates. My sister is also fortunate to have met her soul mate. I want to believe that people get married to be with each other for life, but with the advent of technology and the fact that we've become a throw away society, I think it's time to restructure things.

Nothing says that the license couldn't be renewed until death made the license invalid.

reply to post by PhantomLimb


If people want a divorce before the five year mark, they should've dated longer or they got married for the wrong reasons. At least in my opinion. I would never get married until I knew the person inside and out.

reply to post by Afterthought


I don't know it works outside of Kentucky...
Never married out of state...
but according to what I learned from officiating several marriages (yep I'm a Reverend...)
and what I learned from my own Marriage...

Marriage Licenses do expire...

You got 30 days to get hitched... or you gotta buy a new one

Once you get married... and all the legal work is done you get a
"Certificate of Marriage"
which is not a license...

What your asking is... a call for taxation on Marriage...
a way for the government to get extra bucks out of people...

No offense but please don't run for political office anytime soon...
you would make a lot of people angry by the means of frivolous fees

I love the idea... we can change it to " Till death or 7 years of torment do us part!"
I SAY HELL YES!

reply to post by EvolEric


Thanks for bringing up the technical aspect of today's licenses and the Certificate of Marriage. I've never been married, so I wasn't aware of how they currently work.

Don't worry, I have to need or desire to hold office. But, as long as we have free speech and can propose ideas, I will continue to do so. I'll never condemn someone for wanting to discuss an idea. This is one of the ways people learn and connect.

Divorce is just to messy and painful. I'm really just proposing something that may make people think twice before they decide to get married, or make things less painful.

I guess I'm a hopeless romantic and the idea of arguing your desire to remain married is filled with rose colored mist to me.

reply to post by Afterthought

The state you were married in would send you a notice reminding you that your license was getting ready to expire and that you either needed to schedule a hearing to discuss why it should be renewed, or send them an allocated list of possessions and property that would be distributed equally amongst yourselves by monetary value. Anything being argued over would be on a separate list and dealt with at a mediation hearing. The license wouldn't be an individual license, but would have to incorporate both people.

When applying, each person would have to provide a list of all of their property and possessions, which would be kept on record. Upon approval of the license, the couple would also have to sign a prenup. After all, marriage should be about love and not how much you can acquire by the expiration date.

Then why bother getting married in the first place? Common law living arrangements are fine if there's going to be an expiry date.

Have you ever tried to put together a list of possessions? It's a lot of work. What about things you've sold or given away? You're supposed to keep track of all that?

A piece of paper saying you're married does not make the commitment work. Only the people involved can do that. The paper is just for legalities such as pensions when you get old, or making sure that other family doesn't get in the way of the last will and testament, or to be able to handle the arrangements of the spouse's death.

Originally posted by Afterthought
reply to post by PhantomLimb

 

If people want a divorce before the five year mark, they should've dated longer or they got married for the wrong reasons. At least in my opinion. I would never get married until I knew the person inside and out.

You cannot ever know someone completely. It's impossible and to think otherwise is extremely foolish. People change, have secrets, and fall in and out of love. It's a fact of life.

reply to post by snowspirit

Have you ever tried to put together a list of possessions? It's a lot of work.

Yes, I have done this and continue to do so for my home owners insurance. I live in a hurricane prone area and make sure I list any major things I acquire. Anyways, I don't buy things often (except for food and necessities), so I guess this part of the idea didn't seem like such a huge deal to me.

Originally posted by PhantomLimb

Originally posted by Afterthought
reply to post by PhantomLimb

 

If people want a divorce before the five year mark, they should've dated longer or they got married for the wrong reasons. At least in my opinion. I would never get married until I knew the person inside and out.

You cannot ever know someone completely. It's impossible and to think otherwise is extremely foolish. People change, have secrets, and fall in and out of love. It's a fact of life.

You did read the part where I said I've never been married, right? I've been in two long term relationships and several short term ones, but the fear of marrying the wrong person frightens me. I believe that when I meet the right person, my heart will tell me and the fear will naturally subside. I'm not a person who takes things lightly and jumps into things. I keep a nice wall up and if a man wants to labor to chip through it, his persistence and determination usually wins me over and I'll agree to date him. I like to think of myself as one tough cookie.

Originally posted by Afterthought
reply to post by snowspirit

 

Have you ever tried to put together a list of possessions? It's a lot of work.

Yes, I have done this and continue to do so for my home owners insurance. I live in a hurricane prone area and make sure I list any major things I acquire. Anyways, I don't buy things often (except for food and necessities), so I guess this part of the idea didn't seem like such a huge deal to me.

And if there are 2 people, or children involved, to have to say what belongs to who, is also likely to start huge fights. What if the guy wants all the tools, and the woman want's all the kitchen gadgets. Chances are that they've bought too many things together, or if the woman stays at home and looks after everything (housework, kids, pets) while the guy goes out to work, who's going to decide what her work around the house is worth, and what she should get if the guy is the only money maker. To worry about having that come up every few years :shk:

It costs enough to get driver's licences renewed. We need them to drive though.
People don't need a marriage licence to live together.

What about doing marriages like people do everything else. Option A you get married by current standards which is a for life deal. Option B breaks down into multiple of the same, where your marriage is more of a lease which can be set to 5,10 or 15 years with the option to go permanent at any given time during this period.

That would make more sense to me really. Why make people that are certain they are compatible renew their license at all. It would be easier to have the option of just doing the "lease" style of limited years with the option to upgrade to forever status if it works out.

reply to post by snowspirit

or children involved

Thanks for breaking my only rule for this thread's discussion.
I made this request at the end of my thread.

Could everyone else please not bring up the aspect of children for simplicity's sake.
Thank you.

reply to post by SpaDe_


I like your view of the A or B.
It's always nice to be able to test the waters. Some people just don't like the idea of marriage. I've often thought of a way people could have a Ceremony of Devotion instead of a Wedding ceremony, so their friends and family could see them both admit their love for each other, then celebrate. It just wouldn't involve a contract.

Originally posted by Afterthought
reply to post by snowspirit

 

or children involved

Thanks for breaking my only rule for this thread's discussion.
I made this request at the end of my thread.

Could everyone else please not bring up the aspect of children for simplicity's sake.
Thank you.

Sorry, I missed that part.
Although your fleeting thought about licences to have children might not be a bad idea.

One of the other things that I thought about, was that there are women out there that want marriage ceremonies that are out of this world expensive. If ceremonies had to be renewed as well as the licence and certificate, maybe that would force some to think realistically about the expense. Many weddings these days cost as much as a house!

reply to post by Afterthought


I only read the first 4 lines of your opening post.
Shame on you for even suggesting this idea.I
know that sometimes my husband is tempted
to revoke our marriage license.We're married
until death do us part!
If we were to get a divorce,I would expect "support"
for our three cats!