Duke Grad's 'Sex Thesis' Flunks Internet 101

Originally posted by getreadyalready
I am only saying that there is not some magical number that makes you a slut. There is not some magical number that makes you more susceptible to STD. There is not some magical number that is "safe."

I agree with most of that post, saying there's no "magical number" is quite a different claim than saying it's "not a numbers game", it IS a numbers game but you're right there's no "magical number" and it could happen your first time or your fortieth.

In fact the odds might be something along the lines of Russian roulette with one chamber out of 6 in the revolver loaded. As long as you spin the revolver before each shot you can pull the trigger 20 times without getting shot, or, (though it's not likely) you could get shot on the first trigger pull. For one individual the results are unpredictable and the result of random chance.

However for a group of individuals, the results are very predictable. The larger the group, the more predictable the results are. For a group of 1500 college students or more the results are very predictable.

So I guess we're closer to being on the same page than I thought, about the numbers thing, but maybe you're more tolerant about the 50% infection rate than I am. That doesn't mean I'm right and you're wrong, there's no "magic number" for what the infection rate should be either I suppose, but I would like to see it much lower than 50%. This is for college students. They will only have more partners later in life so the infection rates will go up even more from there!

reply to post by Arbitrageur


We are closer than originally thought, because I think the 50% infection rate is horrible and scary! There is no excuse for a 50% infection rate of anything that takes such intimate contact to spread. The common flus don't have 50% infection rates, and if they did, they would declare a Pandemic status!

Here at my local Univerity after 9/11, they had to temporarily fly in counselors because so many people were trying to donate blood and getting screened out because of diseases they were unaware of. The infection rates were so high that they didn't have enough staff to deliver all the results.

As for me, I am very, very liberal when it comes to sex, but people need to be responsible. I am very, very Conservative when it comes to so many children born out of wedlock, and so many families with 3 kids by 3 different fathers, and all the erosion of the family environment. My views are often criticized, because I see no problem with a happy, healthy, open, swinging sexual lifestyle, but I also think an intact family unit and environment for the kids is absolutely necessary. I don't see any reason both things aren't possible, but I hardly ever find someone to agree with me. Luckily my wife is just tolerant enough to keep me satisfied, and we have stayed married 5 years with 2 wonderful kids. Before I met her, I was playing your Russian Roulette game double fisted and blindfolded. I was lucky I guess. No permanent damage, and no illegitimate children or child-support cases. Phew!

All I can think is that her parents must be so proud.

Dad can brag, "My little girls thesis has gone viral"

Mom can brag "My little girl scored well at Duke"

She even did charts and graphs ...but all in all 13 dudes over 4 yr's seems average for a colege party girl...Since I didn't do the college thing I gooled it to get some references.... and there is no basic average for sexual partners in college it goes from 2 to 10 to 50. Just baseing on the different sites that came up when I typed this into the google..."how many guys do girls sleep with in college" Though most were overall sexual partners they had.

reply to post by getreadyalreadyI agree. It took 21ish yrs of highly promiscuous sex for me to catch Type 1 herpes simplex (fortunately, so far, its confined to 1 area of my top lip & is only infectious during a break out, which has been extremely rare in the 8yrs since). I had crabs once also: whoop de do! Its amazing what you can buy from an ordinary pharmacy these days. Oh how good it is to not be living in the middle ages (even tho some people insist on carrying on as if we were). Do you know, people, you can even buy condoms these days, quite openly over the counter. No need for any of that furtiveness that used to surround them...
As for "horizontal academics", if I were her supervising tutor, I'd have failed her for incomplete coursework. 13? What kind of representative study is that?

reply to post by getreadyalready

The double standard is what it is. It is a fact of life. It exists. It will always exist, and it is the fault of the women just as much as the men.

I starred this post b/c I agree with the thrust of your argument. However, lets be fair. A woman can do loads of men consecutively. Even if she's no longer enjoying it, there's lube. I forget the details, but there was a porn actress that did something like 240+ men in 1 12hr session!
A man has physical limitations on how often/how long he can achieve/maintain tumescence...
I'll not go into details, but, in my mid 20s, I went to a party with a bunch (I forget, but about 8-10) of female student nurses. There was pharmaceutical assistance (which I mention b/c I'm no stud) & elements of curiosity & competition amongst the girls, most of whom had 2 goes each, which culminated in "We have a winner!"
Looking back, it was pretty juvenile, but I'm not sorry! In fact, if I felt I could still do it, I wouldn't turn down the opportunity!
So times are a-changing...

Originally posted by hotbakedtater
Holy Cow that's hilarious! Talk about dedication to your work.

It was no friend that put it on the net though.

I mean if me and my girlfriends wanna laugh about our sex lives and make charts and stuff, who cares?

But to post it online with names is low class tacky and nasty.

I wonder if any of the guys named could feel repercussions from this stunt?

I don't understand... why is it low class tacky and nasty? If you don't want people to know you had sex with someone... then don't have sex... there is no expectation of privacy in this world...

Deal with it... it's just the way it is...

Originally posted by Wildbob77
All I can think is that her parents must be so proud.

Dad can brag, "My little girls thesis has gone viral"

Mom can brag "My little girl scored well at Duke"

Well it definitely has something to do with "viral"

;-)

I love the double standards of colleges.

If this had been a male with 13 female athletes, he would have been expelled the day it wnet public, and would be inlegal procceedings for the next 5 years.

When a woman does it, it's distasteful and tacky. That's it?

This is a very serious breach of multiple privcay LAWS.

The same laws that have 2 people up on charges in the Clementi case.

reply to post by Yissachar1

I do not want a woman who has had more pricks than a second hand dart board.

You know what women find even more repulsive than poor hygiene? A bad attitude.
Sounds to me like you dont want a woman at all, but rather a girl. When you get your car fixed, do you want a kid fresh out of college, or a mechanic thats fixed more cars than you've had hot dinners?
Ever had a massage (not a euphemism)? I get stressed & an aromatherapy massage helps. I once lived near a college that gave the students practice by offering free massages. Some were ok, some not so, some made my muscles knot up worse. An experienced masseur/use is best.
1 of my hobbies is dry stone walling. I'm good @it. I dont mind teaching noobs, but sometimes I need the great outdoors, a good laugh, some old folk songs & the satisfaction of a job well done. Those times, the last thing I need is to have to say "Er... no mate. Thats just gonna fall down." Some of the best times have been when a crusty old farmer, with whom I would probably be sworn enemies with, were it not for walling in common, has taught me something & reaffirmed my faith that we can all get along.
Good sex is a skill.
I prefer skilled lovers.
Still, if someone had damaged my hands as a child, so that I couldn't feel the texture of the rocks properly, I'd not be able to slot them into a wall, knowing that they wouldn't slip, would I? Can you say the same, or is getting your job done, however you can, all thats important?

reply to post by Arbitrageur

HPV, like herpes is also incurable, though there's a vaccine out for it now that women especially should get. But nothing like that for herpes that I know of.

Just to address this quickly: do you know that the strains of herpes which can be contracted without a "breakout" are very rare? The problem is that the info generally available on the most common form, herpes simplex, almost always shows developed sores, rather than the tiny mark which precedes such.
Do you also know that Hepatitis A, which can kill you, can be contracted by inhaling the droplets of moisture coughed or sneezed by an infected individual, just like flu?
Oh noes! We gotta hide in our houses coz the plague is upon us!
Why is it that people are so freaked out by infections that can be picked up by sex, when there are far more, & consistently annoying, infections that we constantly pick up from each other? Could it have anything to do with the prevailing perjorative, hidebound traditional, enshrined in religion, based attitude towards sex?
Er... wake up, people. Its the 21st century. We got doctors, condoms & contraception... life is sweet, if you want to taste it.

reply to post by getreadyalready

We are not afraid to walk away from a sexual encounter, and not too proud to wash up in a sink or carry some disinfecting foam.

Personally, I dont trust those foams. There's plenty of things other than the well known STD/Is we can pick up from skin to skin contact, kissing or even just inhaling each others exhalations. Since the advent of things like MRSA & C Difficile, I prepare & leave by using the same gear they use in hospitals: alcohol gel.
Oh & does it sting? Like a mofo! However, if you use a cream designed for haemorrhoids, with topical anaesthetic, 1st & aloe vera gel after, its ok. Hands & crotch seems to be working fine, but that doesn't stop the 'kin flu!
As you say, with practice, we know when & what protection is needed. I'm a shaved man: if I'm going to party, the above is responsible prep. A little frankness before play begins is all it takes to know what activities are ok & what degree of protection & clean-up is required.
I could sit in my chair all day, b/c my back often hurts if I get up quickly. I could refuse to cross the road for fear of being run over by a car. Perhaps if I'd stayed in the womb, I'd have been safe? Yeah, I'll bet my mum would've been struck by lightning!
Life is risk, people. Embrace it, my friends, or choose to merely exist.

Epic ethics fail.

That thesis isn't going to do her studies any good!

Originally posted by Wildbob77
All I can think is that her parents must be so proud.

Dad can brag, "My little girls thesis has gone viral"

Mom can brag "My little girl scored well at Duke"

I have a son & daughter currently at university. I'd be horrified if some of the money I've given them hadn't been spent on partying. I'd be mortified if I thought they weren't getting enough sex.
Remembering what it was like to be their age, I'd have gone insane if I hadn't had plenty.

reply to post by Bunken Drum


So the more sex you have with different people you have the better you become? What if you have sex with one person a lot of times, and its good, does that not count?
Being married i do not wish to satisfy anyone else or care about any other womans sexual gratification except that of my wife.. I suppose that makes me weird huh?

Do i want to have sex with every other person that woman has had sex with? Do i want to further the degeneration and destruction of family for a five minuet knee trembler with no meaning?

Or do i just want to make love to my wife, only her. Retaining my loving family. One that will not contribute to the animalistic, degenerate, immoral generation..

Which set of values have a hope and a future? The hope of the family? Or where everyone just ruts with anyone, lose themselves with the excessiveness, passing on sti's and making a selfish, pleasure seeking generation that will surely destroy itself?

reply to post by Yissachar1Do you know that studies have shown that between 20-25% of children in the west are not the genetic offspring of the man who thinks he's their father? Now, considering contraception & that women dont get pregnant every time they have sex, for there to be so many 'cuckoos in the nest', there must be an awful lot of promiscuity going on. Seems the ancient Hebrews knew this too & stuck with matrilinear descent. Not your wife tho, b/c she's as pure as the driven snow, eh?
No, all that a lot of good sex with 1 person can teach is how do the best for each other with your current level of understanding. Wider experience & experimentation provides better knowledge & practice applying it. Thus you can then also have better sex for love as well as for fun.
There is nothing meaningless about sex for fun. Its meaning is fun. Personally, I haven't had a 5min knee trembler since my teens, but then I enjoy sex for a lot more than the climax, so I like to 'make a meal' out of it.
Nor is sex for fun/love mutually exclusive. Enjoying oneself isn't selfish either. Whats selfish is attempting to demonise, or, look down on, others b/c they have different morals to you.

reply to post by Bunken Drum


If in the future i become so lacking in self control that i cheat on my wife for "fun", then i will quote your arguement verbatum to her and see how far THAT gets me!

"But honey, i did it because i wanted to learn new things to give you better sex!"
"Bunkem Drum said its ok"
"What are you doing with that knife baby?"
Whats selfish is destroying the family because you cant keep it in your pants. This has a knock on effect on the whole of society.

Originally posted by Yissachar1
reply to post by Bunken Drum

 

So the more sex you have with different people you have the better you become? What if you have sex with one person a lot of times, and its good, does that not count?

I was just about to say that!

It's a matter of opinion, some people want to have sex with loads of different people, for whatever reason. Others, like me, are happy with just the one. I played the field for a while and got bored very quickly, it was nothing but mutual masturbation and I grew out of it by the time I was 17. I didn't have anything left to prove to myself or anyone else and I realised that true love is what it is all about.

It may have something to do with the fact that I wanted to be a soldier ever since I can remember. I need someone in the back of my mind when life is hell, someone who I can trust and I will know that they are thinking about me too. A meaningful relationship is all I have been interested in ever since I considered myself a mature person and I don't think it is a coincidence.

reply to post by Yissachar1

Whats selfish is destroying the family because you cant keep it in your pants.

Seems you didn't get the points that sex for fun & sex for love are not only 2 different things, but also not mutually exclusive. What would destroy your family b/c of infidelity is not the promiscuity, it is the adherence to outdated tradition & jealousy (Check this: "The Ethical Slut" by D Easton & C A Liszt, ISBN 0-890159-01-8).
I was married 17yrs. We still love each other (& play together occasionally), but just cant live together. We are both bi, highly libidinous & promiscuous. We have a daughter 21 & a son 19. Also a step-ish son 21. He was the son of our polyamourous lover of 4yrs. She drowned in an accident. His grandparents took him off us. He's as off the rails as I was through my teens, but, so far, he hasn't found a kindred spirit to make him cherish his life, as I did in my wife. Still, he has keys to my & my ex's places, the same as our 2. Despite being a drug-fuelled loon, I wouldn't want him to have to break in to my place, as I had to my mum's, when I had nowhere else to run to.
Our genetic kids are both @uni, doing well, promiscuous & happy. I know this b/c prudery was never part of their upbringing, so we can talk about anything. Sometimes it takes them a while to get to the point b/c, whilst I'm their friend, I'm their dad 1st, so they sound me out a bit b/c they know if they're out of order, I'll not stop loving them, but they'll get my opinion, in no uncertain terms, & I'll phone their mum to let her know there's a blagging on the way.
House rules are the same as when they hit puberty: no excessive noise from a bedroom; no strangers wandering about the place unaccompanied; there'll always be condoms, spermicide, lube, Hibiscrub (soap surgeons use before an op) & mouthwash in the bathroom. Use them or "grounded" will seem like fun.
Does this sound like dysfunctionality to you?

reply to post by Bunken Drum


Honestly? Yes..

Not normal at all. But it works for you..

You may think im old fashioned and judgemental but i find that kind of lifestyle abhorant and everything i hate about what western society has become all for the sake of an orgasm.. Do you not see the obsurdity of that? For an orgasm people will ruin their relationships and bring turmoil to their families that take them off the rails into drugs etc.. And years of therapy.. Just because people lack self control and are to selfish to put their families needs over their own... For a freakin orgasm

I know when my kids leave home they will be up to hanky panky, but I know that they have values that set them apart from the usual dross and respect their bodies and their family..

Sex is not the be all and end all of life. Its a part of it but not the most important. The most important thing is to invest in your friends and family. You can do that without bonking everyone. And in marriage you have a partner who will not betray your bed and your home. Strong family ties.. That create strong moral children..

Im sorry if my opinion offends you. You are living how you want to and being true to yourself, but to me its not what i would expose my family too and nothing you could say would change that so we would have to agree to disagree.