Culture of Victimhood - Personal Essay (Warning: VERY VERY LONG)

Culture of Victimhood

We the people of the United States of America, in order to create a more perfect union have become victims. I am not talking in the sense of the September 11, 2001 terrorist attacks where there were actual victims either. I mean in the sense of we are no longer responsible for anything we do. We live our lives jumping from moment to moment making sure at no time do we suffer consequences that we can’t blame on others. It doesn’t even matter who is the target is anymore so long as it exists. We blame the evil government for each injustice we suffer then we turn around and spill boiling hot coffee in our laps and sue McDonalds. How ridiculous we have become when we can’t accept that sometimes we simply mess up and have to take our lumps. But there are no lumps to be had. The problem is we even blame our Victimhood on others as well. We can’t take responsibility for the fact that we have become meek and unable to coexist.

But no we blame the government for our ills. We think policy is affected by a president who received oral sex. That act never crashed a nation. We think policy was affected by a president who spoke in a different manner. He couldn’t pronounce a certain word and thus we marked him unfit when in reality not a single person alive can stand up to universal scrutiny. We the people have to have an answer for everything and can’t fathom that things sometimes just happen. We have to believe everything was sinister on a global scale instead of on a persona scale. Well ask yourselves this, if evil exists in the government, does it not also exist in you?

You are the government because you made it. Perhaps you personally didn’t vote for the new flavor of the month but many of your brothers and sisters did. We are all so busy blaming our woes on others that we refuse to take responsibility for our own. I am by no means innocent of this crime against the person. I am a guy who has horrific digestive problems, then eats fast food and wonders why I am sick. I am a guy who needlessly throws my money around and gets mad at my bosses for not paying me enough when in reality if they paid me a million dollars then I would needlessly spend a million dollars. No, I submit to you that any person alive who claims innocence is probably guiltier then the one he accuses, including me. I have pointed the finger many times at many agencies and people when in reality the problems start in the individual. Simple logic would dictate that if there were no personal evil there would be no group evil. If A had no evil and B had no evil then A + B will have no evil. But instead we need a corporation to point our war cannons at. We think we as individuals are so much more innocent than Ford who allowed the dangerous Pinto to exist. Did the corporation itself grow life and conscience and decide to allow this appalling mistake? No it started with a person.

Sometimes when we hear a famous saying we try and find out where it came from. We may even be bold enough to claim we came up with it when the fact is somebody somewhere had to be the first person to say it. The same happens at Ford. Somebody somewhere was the first to decide that the gas tank was safe as is. That also means the moment that thought came into existence, several more people had to make a decision to go along with it. We talk about coercion but in reality coercion is just finding the weak and attuning to that weakness. Who do we blame then? When you have a woman who is savagely beaten by her husband it is the husbands fault no matter how you dissect the situation. That man made a personal decision to cross the line and strike her. He shows little remorse but this woman does not call the police and stays with him. What of the second beating he delivers? Do we still only blame him? How about the third and fourth beating when he keeps promising he will never do it again? Does she finally get part of the blame for staying or do we keep saying ‘poor her’ and move on? What about the neighbor who hears this horrific sound and doesn’t call the police? Do we start to blame him as well? I answer yes to these questions. If there is a one-time domestic abuse where the man harms his wife then he is at fault and completely so. If the situation recurs and the woman does nothing then how do we not understand that she should see the situation for what it is and walk? What about that neighbor who identified the need and never did a thing to stop it? Do we let him go free with no consequence? It should be understood now that it is not my intent to say that the woman deserved of earned her terrible beating but when this occurs constantly and she refuses to believe that it will ever happen again despite the almost clockwork history of the husband then there is a deep issue here.

We have a woman who is now a millionaire because she drove her car with a cup of coffee between her legs. Naturally a spill occurs and burns erupt throughout her legs and genitals. Her only complaint in this situation is that the coffee was too hot so naturally for her the only common recourse is to blame the entire situation on McDonalds. We have men who spy on their wives and cheat on them and are upset when the wife responds terribly. Did we truly expect any different? The problem is that as individuals we sometimes truly do.

In all of these situations there lies this common bond of Victimhood. The government is at fault despite the fact that each of them are humans just as we are and we expect them to be perfect. The pedestals we build for them are so razor thin that a sneeze and one bad comment will destroy our hold on what we thought they were. McDonalds is at fault for a stupid woman who drove her car with hot coffee between her legs. Her burns are the fault of McDonalds even though she is well aware that coffee is often very hot when served properly as the treat we enjoy. Although it is true that the husband who beat his wife is responsible for each individual beating, we don’t blame the wife for not leaving an obviously dangerous situation. We have massively obese people who eat nothing but Chinese food and Burger King who are upset that their waste line keeps expanding. Their excuse? They don’t have the time when in reality they refuse to make the time. Then we have the king hypocrite himself, me who eats junk food and is mad because he is sick. He spends his money like a fool and then blames his poor money situation on his bosses for not giving him a better wage. Where does it all end?

The First Step of the Solution: Admit It

We have got to take responsibility for us if we are ever going to heal as a whole. As the equation said, if A has not evil and B has no evil then A + B will have no evil because it was never introduced into the system. A system is simply a computer. It only knows what it is taught much like a child. If we design a computer program to be a calculator and nothing more then we can’t get upset when it does not perform as a musical synthesizer or encyclopedia. The truth is we don’t get upset at our calculator. Zippy is a robot who works at my building. His soul function is to drive around a specified path on the floor and end up in the mail room. Note that not once did I say that Zippy’s job was to deliver the mail. His programming tells him to do one thing and that is to drive his route that ends in the mail room. He cannot make employees put mail in his chute or basket. He just drives and stops and waits as he was told to do. So we cannot blame Zippy when you fail to put your letter in his basket at the time that you know he stops in your department every single day. In fact, Zippy makes several passes. If you fail to do your part of the bargain then your letter will not be delivered but this does not stop employees from blaming Zippy. I contend that if Zippy had a personality he would feel distressed, berated and ultimately depressed thanks to the derision displayed by these self-entitled employees. In reality I envy Zippy because he just is.

In the same respect I can’t blame the cheeseburger I just ate for making me ill. I have only to blame myself because I was aware that the burger would make me ill. Instead I curse the system for making me what I am. Not once until recently did I realize that this entire situation is my fault and nobody else’s. Ignorance is a one time shot. If you pet a beautiful dog that appears sweet and get savagely bitten then that is your moment of clarity. Short of having a severe cognitive defect, you cannot claim that when you were bit the second time that you weren’t aware that the dog was aggressive. You were clear of fault during the first bite but you knowingly put yourself back into the dangerous situation for the second bit. Your claim of ignorance has ended.

The first step of the solution as with any 12-step program is the hardest. You have to admit and be honest with yourself and explain to yourself that you are in control of your life and are not always the victim when ignorance is not involved. You have to be able t differentiate between true ignorance and claimed ignorance. If you knew the dog bit you before why did you approach the situation the second time? Is it the dog’s fault (or in this case probably the owner) that you knowingly put yourself back in this situation? Of course not but the current thinking in many people is that it is indeed still not their fault the second time. We prefer Victimhood where nothing is our faults and we can blame someone or something else for our pains.

Achieving this first step is not easy. We have to find a moment of personal lucidity and make an active point to decide that we have done wrong to ourselves or to others. If we cannot make it past step one then failure is already achieved. Some may claim ignorance even in this step. They weren’t aware they have done wrong and refuse to acknowledge it. This is the person who isn’t ready to heal yet.

[edit on 10-3-2010 by KyoZero]

Chances are that person has acknowledged that somebody else they know are guilty of the Victimhood and have a stout refusal to see their own. Medicine will teach you that there are some people who just cannot be saved no matter what you try to accomplish. That is sad but real.

Often times that moment of lucidity will hit you like a ton of bricks and you suddenly realize you are guilty. That moment is when you have to decide to stop blaming your issues on everyone else. Without successfully navigating this step you will never heal.

The Second Step of the Solution: Finding the Example

Once realization has occurred you have to find the example. You have to make sure you actually fully realize your wrongdoings and know that you own them. Each step is important but this could easily be right up there with step one. If step one is realizing you are dehydrated then step two is finding the bottle of water. Taking that first step can be just as hard as admitting it. Like the dehydration, you’ve admitted you are dehydrated and have a problem now you’ve sought out and found a bottle of water. This is your ultimate solution. The bottle of water is your healing from dehydration just like living outside of Victimhood is your healing from the culture you were previously in.

So your second step is in realization. You’ve already admitted your issue and now it is time to find the solution. Part of that solution is finding the example. If you know what is wrong then you also know what is right and you can identify how to live right. Once you know how to act then you will be capable of reacting when issues arise. Finding how to live is a very personal journey and it is written based on your personal experiences. If your issue was selfishness then you have to figure out how to be less selfish. If in the case of this essay your issue is Victimhood then it is time to learn how to live outside that. This is as easy and simply continuing to admit you are wrong or learning how to apologize or atone for your wrongdoings. The paragraphs for this step are short because much of this is based on what you decide to do. Your journey will never be the same as mine of the man next to you or the woman next to him. Our journeys are determined by what we have found our shortcomings to be.

The Third Step of the Solution: Living the Example Personally

You’ve admitted it and you’ve figured out how you will go about solving the culture of Victimhood. This is the third step and the third step is to live the example personally. If step two was finding out how to solve your dehydration and step one was admitting your dehydration, step three is opening the bottle and taking that first sip. There are some important steps to remember in this step two which I will outline. When you make that first conscious effort to apologize or atone for a wrongdoing you have taken the third step of getting out of that culture. You’ve done your first deed to personal healing and you’ve made an important step. Now you have begun to live the example. You know how to solve the problem and you’ve taken your first step but you are not done. You have to continue to take this same step over and over. Repetition is very important.

Any doctor will tell you that if dehydrated, one sip will probably not cure your dilemma and neither will one good deed solve the entire problem. If we are dehydrated and take one mere sip and throw the bottle out all we have done is temporarily quenched ourselves but the underlying dehydration has not been solved. In the same manner if you apologize for one wrongdoing you have fixed that one specific issue but how many other situations have you not atoned for? Have you really gotten completely out Victimhood if you atone for one moment of your life then fall back into the same culture? No you have not. Chances are you’ve probably made yourself feel good for a brief time but healing has not occurred. Like the water you can’t take one sip and be completely healed despite the fact that your mouth and throat are now watered. Instead you must keep drinking. When that bottle is complete then you will find yourself hydrated and when you continue to do good acts and admit you’re at fault then you have continued to heal. Now you are truly starting to live outside of Victimhood.

The Fourth Step of the Solution: Recognizing the Example

Empty gestures are the absolute bane of true healing. Let’s look at the water bottle again. If you were to drink that bottle down in a rush and not realize that the water was what healed you how would you be expected to go back to the water the next time you became dehydrated? In the culture and healing of Victimhood, if you do not take stock of the actions you are doing then you may not see the true meaning. Your new actions have made another life and your own better and more solid. Our lives need meaning or else we have no true purpose. So to does our healing attempts. If there were no meaning there would be no purpose to the healing and thus we would continue to live in Victimhood. In the same aspect of recognizing that the water healed our dehydration, we have to realize that our techniques and actions are healing ourselves.

I would be remiss if I didn’t take a moment to explain an important concept. You have to want to heal for yourself for it to be real. You can heal for others but unless you have a personal connection to your healing you do not have the meaning and thus may eventually lose the drive to heal. If you were drinking the water just because your friend told you that you should, you have no personal connection to the healing you are providing yourself and are less likely to continue it. Even if you were to continue at no point have you owned your actions and in reality you have set yourself back to Victimhood.

Recognizing that what you are doing is making you better is vital. That keys into your psyche which only you will ever understand no matter how talented a physician of mental health worker is. Only you know you and only you should know you. Recognize your efforts and successes and don’t stop there. Take time to recognize the inevitable failures. Use those failures to reinvent your techniques as your draw closer to perfection, even though you will probably never actually attain it.

The Firth Step of the Solution: Living the Example Publicly

This essay began with a deconstruction of a major problem; Victimhood. You’ll notice that at each of the first four steps the only person considered is you. Now it is time to see how your actions can affect another person, a group and indeed a nation. The problem is that you can never force another to take these steps. The final solution is to live the example publicly. Show your new techniques off. There are inherent dangers of this step to your psyche. So let’s start by reviewing the steps and their relation to the dehydration.

1. Admit It – knowing you have a problem with dehydration
2. Finding the Example – Locating the water bottle
3. Living the Example Personally – Drinking the water
4. Recognizing the Example – Understanding that the water is healing you

If these are our first four steps, the fifth and final step is to show others that water heals dehydration. This way if another person who is dehydrated recognizes their own, it increases the chance that they will find their solution through your example.

As we said the journey is personal but being a living example of your techniques working can inspire others to admit their issues and start the steps. What are the dangers of living the example publicly? There may be ridicule, false morality and derisive insults to your person. Hopefully by now you are strong enough and have inoculated yourself against the problems you will face. If you have then congratulations and I am sure you can handle all the venom that may be spewed at you. One of the keys to avoiding these pitfalls is to remember what was mentioned in step four. You cannot make someone else heal themselves. The old adage goes that you can lead a horse to water but you can’t make him drink. This is also true in the culture of Victimhood. You can sit and try to point out other people’s Victimhood but you face a wall that you simply cannot surmount. You will never force a person to take steps if they are unwilling or unprepared to take steps. All you can truly do is drink the water and hope that others will watch you drinking the water. Doing this often and in public view will increase the chance that other dehydrated people will seek their own water. It may not be the same brand but if drunk and recognized it will solve their dehydration.

The same applies to Victimhood. If you make your example public without being high-and-mighty about it and you do it often you increase the chance that others will see their own errors and thus you increase the chance that they will find their own solutions. Remember the government employee who has done wrong? Remember he is just like you but he lives on the delicately balanced pedestal. He is merely a human and will be prone to the exact same mistakes as you. Live you example publicly and others will recognize the example and find their own.

Final Thoughts and the Ultimate Problem (Fate)

One of the things you should instantly recognize is that every word you just read is bunk. To the majority of people if will never be accepted or understood. They will never see their problem and will never admit it. Thus the next steps in the solution are lost on them. This of course may make your steps seem futile. You’ve solved yourself and that is an important step. We as a people are wrapped in futility and silliness and that allows us to be distracted and avoid our problems. When we are allowed to not have to look ourselves in the mirrors of our mind and soul then there is not problems; at least we don’t think there are. We can’t face our shadows and our sins if we are more concerned with Tiger Woods’ affairs than the horrors facing our nation. When the story of Tiger Woods’ infidelity broke, every station pre-empted what should have been a more poignant and important story. Many people don’t realize that same day four police officers were murdered because the involvement in the Tiger Woods story was intense while the story of those four terminated and lost humans are no more. Even if we found out that each of the officers ‘deserved’ it, the fact does not change that we as a group are more concerned with entertainment that the actions that are serious. We want to be distracted and able to avoid thinking of the pains of ourselves and our society. That is the big issues facing those who want to change the world for the better. How do you awaken a nation who doesn’t care about your message because it is ultimately boring to them?

Final Thoughts and the Ultimate Problem (Hope)

So what is the point of even trying you may ask? There are two answers to this. On one hand you have indeed healed yourself and nobody can ever take that from you. If you lived in a village of 100 dehydrated people and everyone else refused to drink water but you did, then you are healed and that will never change. At least you had the decisiveness to do so.

On the other hand if you affect even one person by your message then you’ve done an amazing job. You’ve affected change in this world. One of the amazing truths to life is that the smallest ripple in the pond of conscious thought can cause waves like you wouldn't imagine. Make your ripple and keep dropping the stones. I would be willing to bet one day your wave will be seen even if when it occurs they don’t recognize that it was you who started the wave. Besides as mentioned several times you should be doing this for you and not public acknowledgment.

The Final Word

You are you and nobody can change you except for you. At no time was this essay delivered to be an attack against a specific person, merely against a growing problem I witness each day. Remember, I am the man who blames the world for his illness so I am just as guilty as the next. Time to go drop my stone…

-Daniel


[edit on 10-3-2010 by KyoZero]

Personal Note: let me say this once again...I do not post this because I think I am any better than anyone. I realize the extreme fire I may about to be up against. Please do not take this as a personal slight to any single person on here or anywhere. This is a general set of thoughts of mine...nothing more. I do not blame any individual person for the pain our society feels...if anything I blame me. I do not in anyway think people who are CTer's are to blame. Again I say this one more time, this is aimed at society and not my way of telling you guys what to do with you life. This is mostly self expression and an essay based on what I see in society and my own personal evils

Note to Mods: This is based on psychology but is really an essay. I have NO clue where I should put this so I placed it here. Hope I chose right

-takes deep breath-

Well here goes nothing

-Kyo

S+F
Excellent thread.

Funny enough today I had to say to someone who I have known for a very long time, who keeps blaming outside circumstances for problems the following

I hope you find the courage to to face the source of these distorsions of actual events. I am tired of it though I still care for you, but starting 18 yrs ago when X happened, and this habit has carried on continuously till this day, when you said "Xxxxx" to Name
Take care and good luck

This person unfortunately has become so wrapped in their own lies and distortions of reality I dont think they know the truth anymore and believe the fantasy.

Which is what we all do to varying degrees when we are looking for blame something "outhere" for problems and issues.

So your OP is very poinant for me at the moment.

As you say as for individuals and nations/societies it is the same, the first step is Recognising, or admitting our habits, addictions, faults before any healing or progress can be made.

However it must be said and to close, that sometimes the issue is out there, the people who that close person to me has hurt over the years by lying and distorting facts to blame others for what they have done.... well to those they hurt or affected they truly were Victims and the problem did lay with someone else.

This is the hardest part to know when we are transferring our issues and problems to others, or when they do maybe come from that source.

I dont think any of us can approach that decision on things in our lives properly unless we first take responsibilty for our own Sh**t, then once we accept that part of ourselves and change it we can see the truth about ourselves and others more clearly.

Kind Regards

Elf

Originally posted by MischeviousElf
S+F
Excellent thread.

Funny enough today I had to say to someone who I have known for a very long time, who keeps blaming outside circumstances for problems the following

I hope you find the courage to to face the source of these distorsions of actual events. I am tired of it though I still care for you, but starting 18 yrs ago when X happened, and this habit has carried on continuously till this day, when you said "Xxxxx" to Name
Take care and good luck

This person unfortunately has become so wrapped in their own lies and distortions of reality I dont think they know the truth anymore and believe the fantasy.

Which is what we all do to varying degrees when we are looking for blame something "outhere" for problems and issues.

So your OP is very poinant for me at the moment.

As you say as for individuals and nations/societies it is the same, the first step is Recognising, or admitting our habits, addictions, faults before any healing or progress can be made.

However it must be said and to close, that sometimes the issue is out there, the people who that close person to me has hurt over the years by lying and distorting facts to blame others for what they have done.... well to those they hurt or affected they truly were Victims and the problem did lay with someone else.

This is the hardest part to know when we are transferring our issues and problems to others, or when they do maybe come from that source.

I dont think any of us can approach that decision on things in our lives properly unless we first take responsibilty for our own Sh**t, then once we accept that part of ourselves and change it we can see the truth about ourselves and others more clearly.

Kind Regards

Elf

BTW I am working on correting some grammatical errors.

Yes Elf I couldn't agree more (anot because I was the author)

I have to admit I was TERRIFIED to post this here for fear of the extreme flak I may catch. But even if I were to be blasted by ten people after I can say what I wrote caught you and for that I am pleased. I could care less who takes the credit for what I wrote. I am not an original thinker by any means. I think alot of people here on ATS know that people are victims. They read the stories and they are intelligent. I am just saying what I think

Like I said, this is all very personal for me. I am baring my soul to all of you because frankly I just recently (as in this weekend) finally realized what an idiot I have been, So to any here I offended or played the role of victim to I sincerely apologize.

Thanks Elf

-Kyo

The government is blindly dedicated to securing the safety of the public, to the point where it doesn't trust the judgement of its citizens anymore and wants to take responsibility that otherwise would be individual by nature. This means we all have to pay to make all our institutions idiot-proof.

This is the psychology of liberalism, leftism, progressivism -- whatever you call it, the origin is crowdism, or the will of the mob to have it be Not Our Fault. Instead of simply fixing themselves, they're seeking external scapegoats and self-esteem builders. The scapegoats are the powerful (God, Kings, corporations, Nature) and the self-esteem builders consist of lifting up the underdogs, praising the neurotic, and of course liking themselves. Backward thinking means you start by liking yourself; you don't like yourself because of anything you've done, learned, conquered or achieved. It's the loser table at high school appointing themselves Fuehrer.

It takes a long time for the nerdy self-conscious low-self-esteem dropouts of the world to unite and overthrow their betters, but they've had many centuries to do so, and they finally started to really pick up steam around 1945 or so. Ever since then, being strong and doing what's right has had that nasty sting of "well, you could be the new Hitlerstalin" to it, and so smart people have backed off from changing anything beyond their own matching paint tones at home. The result has been a chaotic society spiraling out of control, and the only real winners are the profiteers who pander to parasites and idiots with moronic products like hip-hop, Snuggies, Big Macs, glow-in-the-dark dildos.

This is the psychology of liberalism, leftism, progressivism -- whatever you call it, the origin is crowdism, or the will of the mob to have it be Not Our Fault. Instead of simply fixing themselves, they're seeking external scapegoats and self-esteem builders. The scapegoats are the powerful (God, Kings, corporations, Nature) and the self-esteem builders consist of lifting up the underdogs, praising the neurotic, and of course liking themselves. Backward thinking means you start by liking yourself; you don't like yourself because of anything you've done, learned, conquered or achieved. It's the loser table at high school appointing themselves Fuehrer.

I don't want to boil it all down to money, but money reflects the degree of organization in our society. A sensible society thinks forward: it looks at reality, tries to understand it, and then sets reasonable goals and charges forward to accomplish them. A sick society thinks backward: it congratulates itself on being brilliant, and finds a reason why it is owed money by government or some other large scapegoat. The healthy society thrives and gets more organized; the sick society lapses into greater degrees of disorganization until its population breeds itself back into gibbons and flings poo at the camera

Originally posted by concernedcitizan
I don't want to boil it all down to money, but money reflects the degree of organization in our society.

Not at all CC. I welcome every comment and ciriticism of what I have written. You could well be right and I agree that we always seem to look for the scapegoats of the world and to me that is a disease. It happens at every level from an individual making seemingly tiny decisions (such as me eating that nasty burger) to the massive decisions on war

thank you so much for the comments. I would like to point out that I also think every group, left or right, Christian or Atheist, whatever or whatever is guilty of this.

-Kyo

Excellent post. I'll have to reread the essay again later, when I can focus more time on it.

One thing did stand out to me, though, that I disagree with to a certain extent.

Simple logic would dictate that if there were no personal evil there would be no group evil. If A had no evil and B had no evil then A + B will have no evil.

There is such a thing as mob or group mentality. Those situations where an individual alone wouldn't go rioting through the streets. But put a bunch of those individuals in a group, and something changes. Of course, that's taking your comment out of context and applying it to something else, but that thought did occurr to me when I read it.

I think the culture of victimhood is why we have such a huge welfare system, so many lawsuits, etc. We've changed from the idea of hard work is the only way to get what you want, to a sense of entitlement. Which is not to say that everyone on welfare has that attitude at all....but many do.

Great essay. Can't wait to read it again.

reply to post by smyleegrl


Thank you smiley for the comments. In a way you are right. Groupthink can do horrific damage. I really should reword this to say...

If the CAPACITY for evil didn't exist in A and the CAPACITY for evil didn't exist in B then the CAPACITY for evil can't exist in A + B

Definately debatable and I am in no way saying you are wrong...just clarifying what I think should the debate move on

-Kyo

reply to post by KyoZero


Great Post S & F.

I have to say that I agree to the extent that we do whine about everything, and I say "we" because even I do it sometimes *although I try to limit myself*. Also that we are very biased to what we see as right and wrong.

But the reality of the situation is that you are argueing Human Nature. There are wolves and there are sheep, and then there's the shepard.

I hope this doesn't break someone's reality but government officials are elected by a panel of people who are already bribed. The system is a joke and whether you're a sheep or a wolf you still have to answer to the shepard.

i.e.

Sheep => You, Me, Elected Officials, Government, Masses, Lawyers.
Wolves => Jesse Ventura, People fighting to make a difference, Independent Sites such as ATS, even people with evil intent trying to change the status quo, Martin Luther King.
Shepard => Military Industrial Complex, Bankers (Rothchilds), Corporations, Wall Street, The Invisible Elite.

Even those that fight for justice and equality are fighting a war playing by the rules of the Shepard, how can you win? How can you prevail when bilatteraly you are still defending the system, the tools that keep you enslaved.

There is no evil or good, there's just tools to be used, thats it.

If you want to change the world, you have to destroy or change the tools the elite use to influence the sheep and the wolves.

Fox *my 2 cents*

reply to post by FoxStriker


And I thank you immensely for your comments. That certainly does give a view on my sometimes black and white concept of life. There are definitely levels to which we take our issues.

-Kyo

reply to post by KyoZero


Fate, if you look at it from an analytic perspective, is pretty much a dead thesis. If you interpret it to mean that whatever happens, (inevitably) happens, you haven't contributed with any significant information. However I act, when we look back on it, we can always say that "that's how it had to happen." If you'd write it down mathematically it'd look like this:

A = A

Obviously such a vital concept for ancient societies and cultures around the world cannot possibly just mean that events take place, period. It wants to address something else. When Julius Caesar threw the dice and repeated that he'd thrown the dice, he was trying to emphasize something beyond mere events. A decision had been made and no one could change it.

Before civilization as we know it, people were much more aware of their ruthless environment. Fate was probably introduced as a way of communicating that no one could change much of what was going on in life. Death, diseases, old age, storms and wars. All of it beyond the individual's power. And still it's all part of life. At that point you come to accept certain conditions in life, maybe even try to embrace them (compare with Nietzsche's philosophy).

Fate is therefore a two-sided coin. On the one hand it teaches us to accept the limitations of human existence. We can't do much about death, age or hunger. It's all part of our natural cycle. On the other hand it seems to suggest things happen anyway, so why bother doing anything about them? This is a negative attitude, one that we should be constantly waging war against. Learning to accept the powers too great for you is part of growing up--but using those conditions to your own advantage and creating greatness out of life, that is a task only worthy of real men and women.

Learn to accept--love--what is necessary, and embrace that which is possible.

We are all a product of chance.Yes this world is awfull.I however did not ask to be pulled out of my mothers uterus.

Great thread! There's a lot of truth in it. People so often victimize themselves while it is better to take some responsibility. The example of the woman spilling coffee is a great one. How about fat people sewing McDonalds because eating the food there made them fat?
I think this 'victimizing' can be found in some religions as well.

What a wonderful ephipany kyozero, well done. Hopefully the idea will spread.

You should write an e-book

Excellent writing, even though i necessarily don't agree 100%

But before i say that, i think i must read it once again and really digest it.

Excellent thread star and flag.

"We are all slaves to our histories. If there is to be a .. bright future, we must learn to break those chains." -Delenn

Thanks for an exellent thread KZ.

The main problem with us - the victims - is the projection. We keep wanting and creating certain conditions, yet when we fail in our demands, we don't have the understanding to reasonably admit that our disappointment is due our demands, our desires and so on.

Maybe we are like a certain four-lettered god in a some quite widespread holy textbook, who blames his failures on others, who mainly are people of his creation - who then goes forth and destroys them with a flood, sends them pestilence and breaks it promises of a "union that cannot be ever broken", whenever they fail to meet his terms.

-v

reply to post by v01i0

Aren't you victimizing yoursel/us with this question?