A Little Help For Men Trying To Understand Women!

reply to post by thehumbleone


I agree! I think that fear is probably the biggest thing. Fear of not being able to support themself, fear of being hurt again, fear of rejection...we could go on and on with the list!

reply to post by Greenize


It simply isn't going to happen. I just know better.

reply to post by wylekat


"A man is but the product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes." -Ghandi

One of my favorite quotes. What have you been thinking about? What are your thoughts directed on?

reply to post by thehumbleone

It's kinda like throwing fish in a shark tank

No, it's more like throwing a bleeding cow in a piranha tank. With a little BBQ sauce for taste.

[edit on 24-8-2009 by wylekat]

Originally posted by Phenomium
So they didn`t win their rights...it was a gift from a man

Um, excuse you? You are putting man on a pedastal of complete control over women, as to say that women having rights was "a gift". That's just damn well absurd.

assuming you are female

I thought SD cleared that up already.

they are punishing men in court by every means possible.Child custody cases, Alimony, favoritism ........... snip

And viagra for men covered by insurance, but not surgery for chemically overweight women to be more healthy.
It's late or I could remember more of these "one way deals", which goes both ways.

They would put us all in cages given the opportunity, I do believe this.

And what, then entice men to erection and orgasm, so as to not kill off the human race? Jeebuz man, this isn't Planet Of The Apes.

If you refer to prison as a cage, this is already happening on an unprecedented scale via these court cases that favor women who are being helped by feminists.

I'll bite that one when you show cause that just as many women commit just as many crimes as men.

Feminism started in the streets at street level and this is where it must be uprooted as well.

So what are ya gonna do, go on a killing spree of feminists while the gov that is supposedly doing this conjures of more ways of control?
The gov doens't NEED feminists to control, it already HAS control. Bitching about it on a forum is for naught.
Maybe the real conspiracy is in making folks like you think it's all the feminists fault, while the men in charge go on about raping your rights.

reply to post by wylekat


You may think you know that, you may think you believe that.... I am not trying to psychoanalyze you, but you need to believe that you are worthy of being loved and trust me YOU ARE!!! YOU ARE!!!! YOU ARE!!!!!!

Originally posted by Greenize
I am sure that you are not ugly!

Ugly is such a, well, ugly word. Making a statement that someone is ugly is indicative of an ugly spirit. In which case, is not worth giving credence to.

Originally posted by wylekat

It has done me in. I am no longer fit to be someone's husband. I will never trust anyone ever again. I can be civil, I can be polite, I can be friendly to women... but I'd never trust one to be my wife any more. Is that my decision? Yes. It's been the first one I have been able to make, and it's for my own safety. And for what's left of my sanity, no matter how thin it is.

W, I'm sure there's no one on this thread who as not had, or is immune to having, their heart being crushed somewhere along the way.

I hope from the bottom of my heart that you can one day see yourself with higher esteem. Nothing to do with women, just so you can find peace with yourself and stop being so hard on yourself.

I realize that one of our self-protection mechanisms is to just give up on people so as to never again putting one's self up at risk for great suffering ... I was once there myself ... But I also at some point discovered that the same walls we put up brick by brick to protect ourselves from pain, also keep out the love. And that to me was a worse fate and future to consider than any short term, albeit intense suffering, that a failed relationship can dish out.

I am not joking when I say you can always contact me via U2U if you wish to bounce some thoughts around. It is an earnest offer.

[edit on 23 Aug 2009 by schrodingers dog]

reply to post by thehumbleone

What are your thoughts directed on?

You probably dont wanna know....

reply to post by schrodingers dog


Exactly! Great points as always!!

PS... I love your momma!

reply to post by schrodingers dog

I realize that one of our self-protection mechanisms is to just give up on people so as to never again putting one's self up at risk for great suffering ... I was once there myself ... But I also at some point discovered that the same walls we put up brick by brick to protect ourselves from pain, also keep out the love. And that to me was a worse fate and future to consider than any short term, albeit intense suffering, that a failed relationship can dish out.

Ah! so true, something I struggle with daily and trying to stay balanced but alas, not an easy task.

Thank you for saying something that I have said but you have put in a more visual and understandable way.

Hope everyone who has been hurt pays attention and realizes it is our wall and fears that keep us from ultimate happines.

reply to post by schrodingers dog

W, I'm sure there's no one on this thread who as not had, or is immune to having, their heart being crushed somewhere along the way.

Once is bad, but on a constant basis? It's one of the reasons I went on the bent I have been on. It not only does the obvious, it frustrates me no end.

I am someone who knows something about probability, and a 100% failure rate is something that boggles. I have seen things that defy any rational explanation. I have been treated with such contempt just because of my looks, and lack of money, it's incredible.

A little heartbreak is one thing. I cant find many who get treated like I have. No one I have talked to have answers. Everyone- including me is as mystified as one can be. I've gotten to the point where I just simply do not care. It's an unsolvable problem, or a prison sentence/ punishment, or the universe/ whoever's in charge/ God hates me with a passion.

I am tired of trying to search for answers, and I really have had enough of the nonsense I have been thru nearly nonstop.

[edit on 24-8-2009 by wylekat]

Originally posted by Misfit

Originally posted by Phenomium
So they didn`t win their rights...it was a gift from a man

Um, excuse you? You are putting man on a pedastal of complete control over women, as to say that women having rights was "a gift". That's just damn well absurd.

assuming you are female

I thought SD cleared that up already.

they are punishing men in court by every means possible.Child custody cases, Alimony, favoritism ........... snip

And viagra for men covered by insurance, but not surgery for chemically overweight women to be more healthy.
It's late or I could remember more of these "one way deals", which goes both ways.

They would put us all in cages given the opportunity, I do believe this.

And what, then entice men to erection and orgasm, so as to not kill off the human race? Jeebuz man, this isn't Planet Of The Apes.

If you refer to prison as a cage, this is already happening on an unprecedented scale via these court cases that favor women who are being helped by feminists.

I'll bite that one when you show cause that just as many women commit just as many crimes as men.

Feminism started in the streets at street level and this is where it must be uprooted as well.

So what are ya gonna do, go on a killing spree of feminists while the gov that is supposedly doing this conjures of more ways of control?
The gov doens't NEED feminists to control, it already HAS control. Bitching about it on a forum is for naught.
Maybe the real conspiracy is in making folks like you think it's all the feminists fault, while the men in charge go on about raping your rights.

I am not going to continuously let you twist my own words and use them against me while taking them out of context. Write me with your own words, don`t just copy and paste mine and then twist and contort until it fits what you say......like I said LAZY!
If women had no rights....then who was it that gave it to them then.......if it wasn`t a man......and no women were in office WHO THEN...give me an answer on that one.

I stand by what I said, I have done the research. The crimes by comparison are more on the male side, but only more because you have to add all the males who have been added there BY WOMEN and the women who have gotten let free......by those standards..YEAH...I think there would be more men in prison.......do the math. You don`t even think before you respond.

As far as extinguishing the human race by putting men in jail,....first off many women are using artificial insemination these days and men are more than willing to contribute as men have no choice but to be sexual creatures, that is how we`re wired,.....give a man in prison a dirty magazine and you have your sperm for the sperm bank. So yes, it can still be done, even if men were all put in prison. Sexuality BTW is how most women manipulate men today anyway...feminist or not.

Viagra.....who cares, they are old men fixing to die. That is hardly compensation for what feminists have done to the men since the installation of feminism.
Birth Control for women is also covered under insurance. I am sure the women who are married to these men are benefiting SOMEHOW from their being on Viagra anyway.
Viagra is available because it is not so much a problem that it burdens the health-care system.
Obesity for women AND MEN are a considerable burden because of the statistics. Obesity is on such a rise in the U.S. as well as the U.K. and many other parts of Europe, there just simply isn`t enough money in the health-care reserves to supply these surgeries via insurance. Obesity is one of the most serious medical problems we have in the states and who can afford that when there are 90,900,000m overweight people in the states. Who knows how many need the surgery but I bet all think they do and would want insurance to pay for it. How did I get these figures..
a quick search on google tells you how many people are in the U.S. = 303,824,640m (rounding down to be generous) 303,000,000m.............. This page tells how many are morbidly obese = 30.6% ( round down)=30%
That gives us the figure 90,900,000 million people that could use this insurance to pay for their weight loss surgery. This equals health-care bankruptcy. With all of the heated issues on health-care reform today....don`t count on this happening for men OR women.
Viagra is a very small percentage of health-care cost and indeed can be controlled as it is not a life saving issue. There are many abominations of insurance such as pecuniary deflection of funds as well as misappropriations and money spent on junk...but it is also spent on junk for women, considering many women always seem to `forget` taking the pill anyway. It is just wasted money. Don`t try to convince me that health-care insurance only benefits men.

As for killing feminists.....ABSOLUTELY NOT! Murder is never a way to solve a problem, but they have an organization well funded to help only women....I think we men need to get our OWN organization to fight back. If it`s a man`s world and you want to compete in a man`s world....then fight like a man, don`t hide behind government and then take pot shots while men`s hands are tied behind their backs...It`s either truly equal or it`s a one sided slaughter. Which is the case between Feminism and men. It`s a slaughter to men because of the government helping women. We need a government to help us or at least a financier.

[edit on 24-8-2009 by Phenomium]

reply to post by wylekat

Once is bad, but on a constant basis? It's one of the reasons I went on the bent I have been on. It not only does the obvious, it frustrates me no end.

I am someone who knows something about probability, and a 100% failure rate is something that boggles. I have seen things that defy any rational explanation. I have been treated with such contempt just because of my looks, and lack of money, it's incredible.

A little heartbreak is one thing. I cant find many who get treated like I have. No one I have talked to have answers. Everyone- including me is as mystified as one can be. I've gotten to the point where I just simply do not care. It's an unsolvable problem, or a prison sentence/ punishment, or the universe/ whoever's in charge/ God hates me with a passion.

I am tired of trying to search for answers, and I really have had enough of the nonsense I have been thru nearly nonstop.

I empathize with you. I seem to be there with you.

I just know that anger and blame at the other person is not the answer.

Maybe is is something within us, maybe it is karma. I don't know but this is my/our lot in life to overcome and forgive.

Then maybe it is something within ourself. To that I can only say, get to know yourself and realize you are doing/living the best way that you can with what you know at the moment.

I have made myself face some ugly things about myself in the last few years. Not an easy thing to do but worthwhile. It didn't change anything except my acceptance of myself and the realization that the world walks to the beat of a different drummer than some of us.

Oh bravo! Absolutely agree -- Us women are not that hard at all to figure out. All we need is a good nights rest, an understanding companion, and a good comfortable pair of shoes. (And the kids happy and safe.)

Men just think too much into it sometimes. Its the hair that throws them off.



-CM

What I don't understand.

My ex tried to steal the last weekend of the summer with my daughter from us. She tried to exploit the vacation part of our extremely expensive agreement. I threatened to bring in the police, and now my daughter is old enough to express her own opinion, so she didn't go through with her threats.

I had plans, it has been a great summer for me and my daughter, and I wasn't about to let my ex destroy it. My daughter wanted to spend the time with me, because she has more fun with me. My ex's attitude, totally resentful. There was a party with the class mates parents, we called and invited my ex, trying to be nice, no return call, and when she picks up my daughter at the end of the weekend, she still has the attitude.

WHY?????

reply to post by poet1b


There are women whose mission in life to make people upset, unhappy, and to ruin them. Such women enjoy upsetting the balance of everything.

reply to post by wylekat


oh get a grip wylekat

Well, we know who is actually up on how feminists and women are, and we know who are (meow) whupped within an inch of their loins, huh?

you hate the feminists (or maybe even just women in general) and the gentlemen that love them

and you sure ain't whupped - good for you

but you can't seem to have a relationship with a woman that works out - at least this is what I gather - going by what you've said so far

maybe you should rethink your approach to women - and how you see women

if you're up for it - how about your description of the perfect gal?

I am actually very curious to know

reply to post by Spiramirabilis


I HAVE a grip. ThankyouVERYmuch.

So- yet another person wants to know what I want in a woman, huh. let's begin with the bare basics. This is what I'd have liked if the world was a little nicer and I still had hope I'd find anything.

My wants- the obvious stuff, since people don't seem to figure out the blatant:

Compassionate. Need I say more?
Smart / Intelligent. The 2 go hand in hand- she figures out almost anything, and has the ability to ask for help when things are beyond her skills. She also knows how to actually BE witty. Fast with an idea, and equally fast with a funny comeback, knows what humor is.

A sense of humor- She knows what humor is- and how to use it. The stuff on tv and in culture today is NOT humor. She needs to know the difference.

Creativity. Being Martha Stewart ain't it! Any chimpanzee can arrange crap in geometric patterns. When I say creative- I mean artistically. Someone who can look at an object, and find 10 different uses for it. Someone who can pick up a pencil, a paintbrush, and actually USE the thing.

Loyalty. I'd rather someone who doesn't want anyone but me. I have had enough of being the fifth wheel, the second banana, what have you. I am not able to handle an open relationship, thanks to my past.

Morals. I want someone who has them.

Drive. I want a woman who has drive. she has goals and dreams, and would want me to help her every step of the way

Now for the physical- Bare assets are first:

Eyes- I wanted a woman whose eyes sparkle and have a light, a fire- that *thing* some women have. I want a woman who can light up a room with her eyes. I want someone who has a strong focus. It's hard to explain it.

Smile- It's another subject I seem to not be able to explain. I know what want in a smile (which goes along with the eyes)- and one thing I do not want are the feral smiles, the half "I am tolerating you/ this pic" smiles, the smiles where it's all teeth and no emotion.

I'm not going to provide a visual reference for your entertainment and amusement.

As for who I'd want.... Let's say I can construct a perfect woman (listens to the shrieks of the feminists and their sex slave supporters).

Someone the same height as me. Weight wont be an issue, if it isn't from her sitting on her rear eating food and doing nothing else. I don't need a large chest, or a large rear. I want someone who doesn't wear makeup, or very little. (yes, I want a woman in her natural, unmodified form.) I like long hair- don't really care about the color- as long as it's natural color.

I really don't care what ethnicity she would be- as long as the factors all work together for someone appealing to me. Not attractive, not 'hot'- just what appeals to me. I used to be attracted to a wide variety of women..

So there you are. I hope you have a nice laugh and a snicker- since your post I have replied to was obviously a jab at me. I'm no dummy. So, feel free to say whatever. I wont even waste the energy defending myself, since it's like peeing on a volcano to put it out.





[edit on 24-8-2009 by wylekat]

reply to post by wylekat

I HAVE a grip. ThankyouVERYmuch.

LOL

I'm not going to apologize for that - I was tired of all the "whipped" comments - this thread was bad enough with the anti women/feminist stuff - but when you all start picking on each other for not being "man" enough, well...enough is enough

So- yet another person wants to know what I want in a woman, huh. let's begin with the bare basics. This is what I'd have liked if the world was a little nicer and I still had hope I'd find anything.

store isn't closed yet

so - first on your list:

Compassionate, sense of humor, creativity, loyalty, morals, drive

you see - I had you all wrong - I really believed you were going to ask for a woman that would mind and obey

my bad

...I want a woman who can light up a room with her eyes...

have you ever met one? :-)

I think maybe this only happens in the movies

but - what do I know?

As for who I'd want.... Let's say I can construct a perfect woman (listens to the shrieks of the feminists and their sex slave supports).

can you see how maybe this type of comment just rubs people the wrong way?

it's a generalization - maybe you don't understand what feminism means - to women

you see it only as constant criticism of men - and an attempt to take away their rights

and again with the male bashing - there are men on this planet who genuinely like women - they just like them and respect them - we're not the enemy

I don't understand why you regard men who are fond of women as being less than men - as if you've been betrayed somehow

So there you are. I hope you have a nice laugh and a snicker- since your post I have replied to was obviously a jab at me. I'm no dummy. So, feel free to say whatever. I wont even waste the energy defending myself, since it's like peeing on a volcano to put it out.

I think you mistake my comments as an attack - I just don't appreciate how you talk about women - or men for that matter

I do appreciate that you replied :-)

I read some of your posts a bit further back - so, sounds like you've had nothing but misery when it comes to women

I say this not to one-up you, or pick a fight - I wish you would really think about this

there are many, many - many - women who have had nothing but miserable, rotten luck with men

do you really have no idea how or why feminism got started in the first place?

I understand many of the points being made in this thread by those who aren't crazy about women - but I don't understand the hostility

so you haven't found your perfect woman yet - and you've given up...

what always fascinates me about people - in general - that complain about how unfair people are - how shallow - those same people always have a list

not a criticism - I have a list too

it's just - everybody has one - our lists seem perfectly reasonable to us - but there are many women out there who may not have eyes that light up a room

you understand?

[edit on 8/24/2009 by Spiramirabilis]