When Did You Choose To Be Straight?

Wow, so many people have theory's all there own to expalin sexuality.

And above anything else I read, we certainly don't seem to have much "choice" in our lives.

It's amazing how much science will be discarded, spirituality will be utilized and just plain ol rationalization used to define ourselves.

What is this need we all seem to have to BE IN A GROUP< Have a Definition.


LET ME SAY THIS

Everyone is full of LIES, Invented DEFINITIVES created and rationalized in order to "fit in" to have "Self Identity" that creates a construct of who you are, a need to have a Defined and Predictable personality because the structure of the brain by Culture and Ideas and Group Dynamics is forged from an Early age to create order from what is essentially chaos in the mind.

THE TRUTH

You can Be Whomever you CHOOSE to be.

That scares the Turd out of people, you all WANT this to be genetic Want to fit in, want a self definition.

Because without it no one would know what to expect from you, Society as we know it, NEEDs us to tell these BS stories for the sake of Order

But the real

Anyone that wants to can restructure themselves in a very, very short time to have any set of desires they want, it's all a Mental construct

In fact arousal studies indicate a degree of Bisexual arousal to the 99th percentile

People WISH to be Straight or Gay, it makes them feel sane to have a definition a set of rules like a child...

But the Actor and Writer in me knows...

If I want to sit down and Imagine what it is to feel like a Woman, discard my belief systems, take on a role, think like a Woman, look with eyes that are Objective try and see a man as a Woman was, pretend i'm a woman in my mind...

I can, at will, entirely sink into that role... and I do it for creative purposes all the time, how could you ever write a Love story if you couldn't do that?

An actor can play a serial kill and do so convincingly without... becoming one in his or her mind?

Ask Heath Ledger about that... if you could, where becoming "the Joker" for a role took his mind

I choose Hetero Sexuality

I choose it because, I prefer it for whatever reasons and prefer it greatly, whatever genetic or life things occurred that made me desire women innately were there for whatever reasons.

But I am not one to be guided by silly things or limited by my genetics or mental impressions or culture...

If for any reason I wanted to be Homosexual and saw it as a better option, I could become a Homosexual

I could become a cannibal or a soldier or Mormon or anything else I wanted and make it my world...

because MY MIND is a Tool I use as I see fit...

And I choose hetero sexuality, because, it's my natural preference and that makes it easy, because it's socially acceptable, because it's allot less risky, allot less lonely it builds me a family, it's cleaner, it brings allot more love to me life via child birth and reproduction, on every level, it's a choice for a better, safer, saner life as I see it

IF I was inclined to Homosexuality

I could brain wash my head out of it... Ditto for my heterosexuality

In fact, in this world and this time and this culture and the health issues and the rest and lack of ability to build a family... from a rational perspective I view it as a deadly choice to be homosexual

So I find Homosexuality to be "disgusting" I have every reason in my head it's disgusting, a mans Body is grotesque to me, a mans smell repulses me...

But i'm not a rationalizer... I know this to be, because it was put in my head as a protection mechanism to feel that way...

That if I put my thingy in a hole in the wall it would from every rational perspective feel exactly the same, that it's all psychological...

My mind associates a smell with Good or Bad and my body reacts to that as my mind tells it too and people and reasons conditioned me to be that way and maybe some of it is genetic that I'm of course inclined to reproduce...

But the act of reconditioning that...

I could do it, I could do it easy if I choose to...

What people fear most

Controlling their own minds... it's so much easier to just, construct a single persona for yourself, it makes social life easy

But it's BS, every drop of it...

You see, the best Actors... they don't Act, they become... this is something I can do, do well... that's why some people can't Act, they can't do it... let go of themselves and come back, so what they do is Act... IMMITATE

But the ability is there, in all of us, to choose who we wish to be when we wake up in the morning...

Do I do this im daily life every day No...

I'm fulla bulla too

I don't always exercise when i should, I slack on my work...

I have Complete control, i could get up today and be a soldier in self discipline, be whatever I wish... but when asked why i don't... I Lie like everyone else

"I was sick, i'm too weak, i'm not smart enough, I can't loose weight"

It's all Lies, really I just don't want to do things sometimes.

But I will not actually lie to myself lol

If I REALLY wanted to loose a few pounds I can just like any good actor I could bulk up and be a huge fat arse or look like Tweaked out anorexic in a single month

I just don't because there is no Oscar in it for me so why bother lol

But it's the same...

995 of people who are Fat, could loose the weight, 99% of people who use the term Gay or straight could if the need was there and the desire to do so was there, simply reprogram themselves anytime they felt like it... they just don't want to, have entire lives constructed around one or the other

and make up bs stories to convince THEMSELVES they can't, simply because it's easier not to

It's called Rationalization

first year Psychology

but yet easy to dismiss because we all Rationalize everything we do, including rationalizing away, Rationalization as a factor...

But LOL

"I was born that way"

Effin Liars lol

I was born a Kluts lol, a damn nerd, a doufus... that's how I was born, a spaz

Did I stay a Spaz LOL NO!

I Throw rappelling hooks over cliffs no as an adult, I ski, Surf Rock climb, study all sorts of Martial Arts...

How'd I become Athletic when by nature I'm a total kluts?

I changed MY MIND about the subject, that's how and my body followed suit because my Mind told it to

I'm not special, The ability to rewire our heads is present in anyone

We just choose not to use it, it's as simple as that.

When I was 12 I just had to make the choice and I chose to be a lesbian trapped inside a man´s body.

True story!





[edit on 30-12-2008 by Waldy]

Originally posted by Good Wolf
reply to post by BlueRaja

 

There are distinctions between disorders and illness though. Neither are normal, but there are different thresholds to qualify which status one is in.

Non-heterosexuality is not a disorder or an illness. It's not bad, it's not "curable".

You're certainly entitled to your opinion, but how exactly can you quantify that empirically speaking? Don't get caught up with the word "normal" = good vs. "abnormal"= bad. Let's look at what the definition of normal is-

"In behavior, normal refers to a lack of significant deviation from the average."


nor·mal (nôrml)
adj.
1. Conforming with, adhering to, or constituting a norm, standard, pattern, level, or type; typical


What percentage of the population do you think is gay vs. straight? For something to be considered normal, it'd have to happen nearly as frequently as any other expected result. Seeing as how this isn't the case, you'd have to at least except the status of different. Of course this can refer to a great number of other attributes other than orientations.

reply to post by mopusvindictus

IF I was inclined to Homosexuality

I could brain wash my head out of it... Ditto for my heterosexuality

Then why don't you do it, chronicle your experiences and prove your assertion. No one has managed what you suggest, and science suggests that it's impossible.

a mans Body is grotesque to me, a mans smell repulses me...

Think about all the males out there who would disagree with you there, did they 'choose' to like it? Think about all the people who try to reform their sexuality because they think they are broken or wrong, then fail miserably, and then those who commit suicide because they are apparently broken beyond repair.

Yes, you choose to be heterosexual because you were already, you pretty much said it yourself.

Let me assure you that if you were not born heterosexual, you'd be singing a different tune.

[edit on 30/12/2008 by Good Wolf]

reply to post by BlueRaja

What percentage of the population do you think is gay vs. straight? For something to be considered normal, it'd have to happen nearly as frequently as any other expected result. Seeing as how this isn't the case, you'd have to at least except the status of different. Of course this can refer to a great number of other attributes other than orientations.

I know it's not normal, homosexuality sits around 1-2% and bisexuality around 1%.

The point is that not being normal doesn't make it an illness or disorder.

reply to post by Good Wolf


Let's look at it in a different way-

In nature there are beneficial traits that are passed on to ensure the survival of a species. If homosexuality were the norm, you'd see a lot of species go extinct. We have the luxury of choosing to do things that we want to do, versus things we need/have to do. Whether or not it's a disorder/illness is a subjective issue, but it'd be hard to argue that it benefits humanity as a whole, in and of itself.

reply to post by BlueRaja


Considering that it's not likely to jump from 2% to a 100% any day soon, it's hardly a cause for concern. Even if it were, these days we can get around reproduction issues.

It is fairly common in the natural world though, it had been observed in thousands of animals, non of which have gone extinct. In chimps for instance, it's quite common for most of the populations to be bisexual. Not an issue however because reproduction is one of many purposes for sex in the troop.

but it'd be hard to argue that it benefits humanity as a whole, in and of itself.

Here's another thing though, how many gay couples are going to have an accidental or unplanned/unwanted pregnancy? None. Gays adopt, giving a loving environment to otherwise unwanted children. This kinda behaviour is also seen in the wild.

There are loads of things that do not benefit humanity, but it causes no harm and being as how every time a child is born there is always a 2-3% of it not being heterosexual, it's hardly an issue worth worrying about is it.

it'd be hard to argue that its detrimental to humanity as a whole, in and of itself.

[edit on 30/12/2008 by Good Wolf]

reply to post by Good Wolf


No One has managed what I am saying? Your Joking Right... TY for proving my pont on Rationalization and the insanity of the need to have an Identity that fits only one form.

1: For starters there are an enormous number of Bisexuals in the world

2: Given public approval in the West I'd say at the LEAST Half of Women under 30 Have had open Sexual dealings with other Women

Please explain that one... 50 years ago, if you asked women if they were attracted to other women you would have gotten the same response most straight men will give you today, all the same BS, "I just don't like it, I could never do that"

Yet... boom, it becomes popular suddenly.... every Teenage girl in a club is HOT at the idea of making with another girl....

3: Prison, No ONE in History has ever changed, lock a big macho murder up for a couple of years and watch how many smaller guys start becoming "pretty" to him"

Try and deny that phenomena please

and i'm sorry, call it need... call it whatever you want, if you cum, you enjoyed it

4: #1 Porn Mag in the world off and on penthouse letters, 90% Straight men purchase yet... It's Half about Wives being done by other men, humiliation, forced homosexual activity and forced feminization

5: How many guys suck it for dope when they get hooked... not Heroin which is the most addictive But Blow and meth, I've seen Blow and meth turn at least a dozen guys the other way in my life time and LOL, the reward might have been free crap... but they had other means lol, sex was the easier option, they choose it, they cum, they like it... It has something to do with cross talk between the hemispheres

6: Should I even start the list of the number of people I have known who have gone "GAY" for a short period of time after a bad relationship?

7: How many men have wives and screw other men? They Get IT UP for their wives... okay you don't get it up if you don't like it, yet they have sex with Men, hiw many of those men didn't ever have those desires until they got bored or had problems with their wives...

8: What should I make of the situation when I have gone out with Gay friends on on dares they get Straight men to "give it a try"

9: How about young people and sleep away camp? Maybe they are all innately gya when they experiment

10: The one I love best... all those people who "Discover" or "realize" they are Gay... at like 43. Guess they were in denial through that lifetime of Orgasm


11: Never been done?

Tantra encourages directly experimentation with opposite ses roles, maybe the whole cultures gay

12: Speaking of which... Explain Ancient greece for me, maybe the Spartans were all Gay, because they had sex with me but had wives.

In how many cultures has it been perfectly acceptable to bend another guy over and that makes you straight, but be on the recieving end then you are Gay LOL

I could just go on and on...

people switch at the bat every damn day and I'm sorry for a guy particularly your either aroused by what your doing or not...

It's all bs,

"I was just experimenting"

"I never really liked it with women/men"

"I only did it once"

So many reasons lol... but lol, you still got it up, you came... you weren't suffering, mop one put a gun to your head


and

Why don't I?

Why the Hell should I... it's called self limitation, I Choose, I don't need, the family strife, I don't need the rejection from women and potential social complications, I certainly don't want the disease risk, and I don't care for the whole Outsider culture thing and I want to be a family man because I Love being a Dad

Why don't I climb Mt Everest?

It's a pain in the arse and so (literally) would be being Gay in the world I live in,.

You don't go through life doing things just because you can... some things to me imho, are just too much, any level of homosexual activity would affect me dramatically publicly, risks my health majorly and more than both woukld turn off 90% of women to me... and run me out of options for what i consider to be a good life...

so why reprogram my head for that? What purpose would I have?

Tell a guy he has life in Jail, he might change his mind, no other options... that's the real world

But people... they do, they switch hit all the tiome, almost everybody has or at least fantasized about it


And BTW ROFL... who's hand is that, who's big hairy muscular hand is it that pulls your pud when your alone? Your a Man right?

I know... I know "but it's my hand"

LOL yeah and it has caluses and feels like a Mans would

Give me a break lol

No one in history has ever ever switched sides and science says it's impossible

Please...please give me a dollar for every guy I have seen do it in my life time so I can retire

Actually, homosexuality is around 6-10% of the population, and bisexuality may be as high as 15%. I've met a lot of bisexuals! This is close enough to 25% of the human race, and just short of 2 billion people! Thats a significant minority.
On top of this, they're born that way.

reply to post by mopusvindictus


Yes there is a lot of bisexuals in the world, I am one of them. Trouble is the sexuality is defined by what gender a person is attracted to, not who they choose to have sex with. That means that if a guy who's never had a gay experience yet is only attracted to males then he is still gay.

By your reckoning, someone who hasn't had sex doesn't have a sexuality, which is false.

Our orientation is not defined by our actions, but our preference.

2nd. Bisexuals can have same-sex relationships and opposite-sex relationships, but they cannot become exclusively heterosexual or exclusively homosexual.

People try to change, it doesn't work. Many gays choose to be strait but fail. I tried to be only attracted to girls but after 7 years of trying without success, I realised it was never going to happen. Sure I could coose to only engage in same-sex relationships but it wouldn't change the fact that I'm attracted to some males also. www.abovetopsecret.com...

I mean why the hell would anyone want to not be strait any way? I didn't want to. I desperately wanted to be normal, but I wasn't. So when did I choose? And why couldn't I change back?

Science suggests that an individual's orientation is set in the womb, hard-wired into the brain before birth. Good luck altering part of your very being.



mystiq
Glad your here.

Actually, homosexuality is around 6-10% of the population, and bisexuality may be as high as 15%.

Yea I know, but more than 90% will self-identify as strait, at least that's what the stats I was just looking at suggested.

The trouble with sexuality stats is the terms. Bisexual for instance. I'm a 3 on the Kinsey scale yet most bisexuals are not, most have some sort of preference. Some are almost exclusively hetero so do you group them in with the straits? Where do you draw the lines?

It's a tricky business as everyone defines things differently..

[edit on 30/12/2008 by Good Wolf]

Originally posted by mystiq
Actually, homosexuality is around 6-10% of the population, and bisexuality may be as high as 15%. I've met a lot of bisexuals! This is close enough to 25% of the human race, and just short of 2 billion people! Thats a significant minority.
On top of this, they're born that way.

I don't think that you can add the sum of those figures, and arrive at a number like that. That's fudging the numbers a bit(no pun intended).

I dont know, but 10 plus 15 is 25. There are just over 6 1/2 billion of us, so close to 7. Thats nearly 2 billion. And if anything, that 15% is a conservative estimate.

reply to post by mystiq


Going to university this year, leaving this small town so...

And if anything, that 15% is a conservative estimate.

Here's hoping.

[edit on 30/12/2008 by Good Wolf]

reply to post by mopusvindictus


Your theory falls flat on its face when you know that for decades some homosexuals underwent 'therapy' that would help them do just as you suggest.

Apart from traumatizing them and scaring them,there was very little success.

If it is hardwired,it cannot be changed.
It can be surpressed,but never changed.

This is why many gay people who have 'gone straight' go to see a headshrinker.They still have a desire within towards the same sex.The headshrinker helps them bury these feelings,not change them.

This thread is pointless since you choose each time you have a sexual encounter. It's not a once in a life time choice. When do you choose to become a homosexual, an adulterer, a heterosexual, a sex offender? You choose when you're presented with the option of fulfilling your sexual desires.

Are you born a chemist, a thief, a ditch digger, a President? Of course not. The only thing you can say you were born as is a man or a woman. The rest is simply a matter of choice. You can give to the poor one day and be stingy the next. You can be fat and then loose weight, and then get fat again. The only thing that's final is death. Up until that point you're a free agent to do as you please.

reply to post by dbates


You miss the whole point.

You choose when you're presented with the option of fulfilling your sexual desires.

But in terms of sexuality, you do not choose the sexual desires or whether they are for your sex or the opposite-sex.

reply to post by dbates


No it isn't.

This thread is for those who believe gay sexuality is a choice to come defend their belief by sharing with everyone the time they chose their straight sexuality.

But I can't help noticing that those who shout the loudest about this have not made an appearance.

You,like many others,see being homosexual as a sexual act.But homosexuality is the attraction to the same sex,emotional as well as physical.Shagging someone of the same sex does not instantly make you gay.

A gay person can be celibate,but they will still be homosexual.Just as celibate heterosexual person will still be straight.


[edit on 30-12-2008 by DantesLost]

Originally posted by DantesLost
You,like many others,see being homosexual as a sexual act.But homosexuality is the attraction to the same sex,emotional as well as physical.

But it is the sexual act that defines the realtionship as homosexual. Living with and having love for a person of the same sex does not make you a homosexual.

I don't know why you feel that homosexuals have cornered the market on repressing sexual urges. Do you know what the average married male thinks when he's presented with an attractive woman who's not his wife? Dude, married men OWN the repressed sexual urges. I can say without hesitation (and probably with the backing of science) that the sexual attraction the average male has towards a woman in a bikini is without equal. Do we fault the man for finding another woman sexually attractive, or for following through with his desires?

No one is what they think about. They are what they do else we would all be millionaires with 5% body fat.


[edit on 30-12-2008 by dbates]

What do they put in beer that can give a pure hetero gay thoughts?

The closest I've been to being bi (in the mind) is when I've drank multiple beers.
And the next day it scares me, because I find the male body sexually repulsive.

Dis-inhibit a hetero, that's just gay.