My daughter forced to be "pro-lifer"

My daughter who is in the 8th grade was required by her Religious studies teacher to make a "pro-life" poster.

She is in a Catholic school. Her mother and I are both born Catholic

We, as her parents do not agree with the "pro-life" movement and don't believe a student at such a young age should be forced to make a choice on a such a controversial subject. I believe that it's the parents responsibility to influence their children on subjects like this, not the schools.

important note..... THIS IS NOT A PRIVATE SCHOOL BUT A PUBLIC, TAXPAYER FUNDED SCHOOL.

After trading a few e-mails with her teacher, suggesting alternate subject headings for her project such as "abstinence" I was informed she would get a "0" because she would not be following the guidelines that were outlined.

[edit on 12-3-2008 by wrathchild]

Originally posted by wrathchild
My daughter who is in the 8th grade was required by her Religious studies teacher to make a "pro-life" poster.

She is in a Catholic school. Her mother and I are both born Catholic

important note..... THIS IS NOT A PRIVATE SCHOOL BUT A PUBLIC, TAXPAYER FUNDED SCHOOL.

[edit on 12-3-2008 by wrathchild]

I am curious how a public school has religious studies and is a Catholic school at the same time? Can you explain?

And didnt you expect this by putting her in a Catholic school? That is what Catholic schools believe and teach. Maybe pull her out of a religious school and put her in a public school where they dont teach religion.

[edit on 12-3-2008 by greeneyedleo]

In the area that I live in you have a choice of the Catholic school system and the protestant school system.

The Catholic system is deemed "public School Board"
The Protestant system is deemed "private school board"
Both are part of the publicly funded education system in the province of Alberta, Canada

I have no other choice other than expensive private schooling.

reply to post by wrathchild


Ah! I see. I wasnt aware it was this way in Canada. Hmm. Well, im pro-life, but I would hate to have my child do ANYTHING that is against my beliefs!!

I hope you can somehow get this sorted out!

Best of luck to you!

I am morally against abortion(in most cases) too. I believe a moral, and a highly funded propaganda machine are to different things and should be kept in the hands of parents , not some stranger getting paid to educate your child.

[edit on 12-3-2008 by wrathchild]

Ugh. I'll be honest for a moment. I am ridiculously pro-life as well as pro-Christian. Not to mention, it makes me ecstatic to hear public schools are Christian schools.

That is my opinion. Sorry, not much sympathy from my end.

However, let's pretend your child is doing something against your actual beliefs (since you said you are Catholic and pro-life that in itself shouldn't be your problem in this case).

Let's say the teachers were having them make gay pride flags or recite Islamic prayers and saying they would receive a '0' for not participating. Or, closer to the original topic, let's say they were making them act in a Planned Parenthood function. Would this be wrong? Yes. I do believe in separation of church and state for this reason and that 'moral agendas' should be kept out of the classroom just because it can work both ways. My beliefs might be endorsed in this case but in 50 years they may not be and I don't want to be forced anything down my throat I dislike.

However, my sincerest apologies for my very vocal bias as I realize it is not P.C. but have not mastered the art of keeping my opinions to myself. I have a hard time mustering up disgust for pro-life and pro-Christian 'agendas.'

[edit on 3/12/2008 by AshleyD]

dont you think that kind of sells the idea to your kid that you may have considered aborting her? or at the very least, that if things were very different, you may have had to? I mean, I see your point completely about abstinence being substituted for pro life, but at the same time, to oppose pro life, is to say to every child and person, "you may not have had the chance to experience life simply due to another persons choice."

prolife to me seems like common sense, abortion is just a lazy avoidance of responsibility. what about adoption?

I mean, I stand on both sides of the fence only because I would not have incarnated or born my self if I knew I were coming into a world where there was justification for my death before I was even born.
but since I was, I dont feel so bad about those who do get aborted, they are lucky they never got to see the world in the state its in. perhaps their soul will get another chance when the world has its problems figured out and no one has to suffer for another mans opinion.

maybe you should just ask your child what they think about the project they are being asked to do, she IS in 8th grade.

besides, them teaching about prolife, obviously states that there is something opposing it, and your child has free will does she not? it was your job before 8th grade to imply to your children what the value of life is, from there, they should be able to make their own decisions.
maybe Im just not aware of the loopholes that would make this something to be upset with the school about.

I mean, if the parents really are doing the job they think they should be doing as parents, then what the school teaches them should be the technical icing on the morality cake.

Im sorry, no offense, I just come from parents who felt the same way, and I could never understand how murder is justified based on physical size. (not saying you do!)

I could understand your beef with the school if they were promoting abortion, but they are promoting life. you cant really argue with that, unless you justify murder or suicide. maybe you can, perhaps I missed something in watching how nature works... OR MAYBE, the report is on the debate of the prolife issue?
btw, this was a subject I personally put to rest on my own way before 8th grade, maybe your daughter has too.

you would think pro life was the safe argument to make, being the public school, perhaps they should turn it around and teach pro abortion.

teaching abstinence comes WAAAAY before the issue of pro life or pro abortion. its in sex ed in like 3rd grade, again in 5th at my public school. you cannot avoid the problem by just saying abstinence instead, what if she was pregnant? I would be upset if the issue was left untouched at public school seeing as it is a public issue,
perhaps you should email them explaining the fairness issue of letting your child choose to abort or not. perhaps that is within the guidelines of the report?

and she is NOT too young to understand, there are plenty of 8th grade mothers out there who made the choice themselves. There are schools now for underage mothers, thats how much she should understand the issue. its real, and it could be facing you tomorrow. especially in a catholic school. just speaking from experience.

[edit on 3/12/2008 by psychedeliack]

So your getting angry that the teachers are expressing a certain viewpoint when in fact your aware that it's a Catholic school? Neither you nor the school should influence your child's decision but you should tell your son/daughter that there are 2 sides of this and let your child decide what he/she wants to do.

It is up to you to see fit when you tell your child this. Just tell you son/daughter to do the project and if he/she wants to talk about it, do.

I agree with you; schools should not be allowed to teach your children moral issues that you oppose. My opinion (if this were my daughter); I'd rather have her get the 0 and uphold my beliefs. I think this kind of position would show your daughter that it is important to stand up for what you believe in.

Best of luck!

I have some other info I left out....

This project is also part of a Knight of Columbus sponsored contest in which the best posters will be used in one of their Pro-life campaigns.

Can I be morally against abortion and still be opposed to the "pro-life" movement???

Originally posted by AshleyD
Ugh. I'll be honest for a moment. I am ridiculously pro-life as well as pro-Christian. Not to mention, it makes me ecstatic to hear public schools are Christian schools.

That is my opinion. Sorry, not much sympathy from my end.

However, let's pretend your child is doing something against your actual beliefs (since you said you are Catholic and pro-life that in itself shouldn't be your problem in this case).

Let's say the teachers were having them make gay pride flags or recite Islamic prayers and saying they would receive a '0' for not participating. Or, closer to the original topic, let's say they were making them act in a Planned Parenthood function. Would this be wrong? Yes. I do believe in separation of church and state for this reason and that 'moral agendas' should be kept out of the classroom just because it can work both ways. My beliefs might be endorsed in this case but in 50 years they may not be and I don't want to be forced anything down my throat I dislike.

However, my sincerest apologies for my very vocal bias as I realize it is not P.C. but have not mastered the art of keeping my opinions to myself. I have a hard time mustering up disgust for pro-life and pro-Christian 'agendas.'

[edit on 3/12/2008 by AshleyD]

I would be just has upset if these ideals were forced upon her by a taxpayer funded education system

geez.. the Catholic school system teaches evolution not creationism

reply to post by psychedeliack


Trust me... I the school was promoting abortion I would get the media,lawlers, heck, even Al Sharpton a call...

You ask if you can be against abortion and against the pro-life movement. I think you're asking the wrong question. Do you want your daughter to be able to make up her own mind or do you want her to be trained to follow what others tell her to do?

I understand you dilemna and I think that it's probably a good thing that you are having this dilemna. It's probably quite healthy!

No matter what parents WANT their child to believe in, they will, in time make their own decisions. But as a parent, you want to have the most influence, not some stranger. That's kinda been my whole point.

Clearly the teacher has no respect for the 'honour thy mother and father" commandment.. she's encouraging children to disregard their parents wishes.

Congratulations to you for standing up and questioning this line of "teaching". I believe it is happening more and more in our school systems. Just last week my children came home with a health class homework assignment that we chose to get a 0 on as well.

The question was How can you get aids/hiv. The answer "they" wanted was that consuming alcohol is a "risk behavior" which can cause aids. We do a disservice to our children when we do not truly educate them in fact. I had them, instead, do their own research on both subjects independent of the other to "teach" them the realities of the risk of each.

I might suggest that you could do the same with this project. While your daughter may still get a 0, she could use this poster to explore the issue rather than to promote only one viewpoint as required. In doing this she will educate herself about the "choice" as to which side of this issue she wants to adopt personally.

Out of curiosity, can I ask if being personally pro-life and catholic you are also against birth control? I am of the opinion that where pro-life and choice come to an impasse, better science and more accessible birth control is the ultimate answer. We just aren't there yet. The problem with this science approach is the belief that birth control of any form is wrong?

Good for you for standing up for true education and not allowing the school to shape what should be a family centered discussion. Thank you for sharing this story.

Peace.

reply to post by wrathchild


Unless you want to get involved in some kind of long process, I suggest you explain to your child what is happening: that teacher is forcing his/her opinion on your daughter. Explain the other sides of the issue to her, and allow her to develop her own opinion.

Unfortunately she will have to go along with it. This is a valuable lesson in life. For now, she will have to 'hide the light' as the I-Ching says.

In the final analysis, the teacher is doing nothing for his/her cause. I imagine your daughter will grow up with the opinion that pro-lifer's are fanatics who do not respect freedom of choice and opinion.

reply to post by rizla


Rizla,

I'm going to respectfully disagree with this comment you made...

Unfortunately she will have to go along with it. This is a valuable lesson in life. For now, she will have to 'hide the light' as the I-Ching says.

Going along with this is, in my opinion, the opposite of teaching a valuable lesson. Our children must learn that it is permissible for them to stand by their own beliefs and opinions, or in this case, the right to learn before they form an opinion. If this child hides the light, as you suggest, over one bad grade we are teaching them that no risk is worthy. One low grade is a small price to pay for personal liberty. As she ages, the price may indeed get much higher, especially given the world we are handing them. Personal freedom will come at a higher price than one low grade and this one is worth taking the "hit." Teach her this and you will have given her a life lesson.

And, now I have a song stuck in my head....this little light of mine...I'm gonna let it shine....let it shine...let it shine...

Peace

I'll share my experience along these lines; my daughter went to Catholic school. I'm an adult convert and she's a cradle Catholic. While neither one of us supports birth control by abortion we do realize that in certain cases it should be an option available to the woman. These situtations include rape, incest and mother's life at risk. I got many phone calls from the school because we are pro-choice under those circustances; needless to say it wasn't a popular point of view but we were always able to find a way for her to participate fully in religion class without going against out personnal beliefs. You'll have to be creative but it's always possible.

reply to post by wrathchild


Because this in conspiracies in Religion so far only a few have been able to give you some good advise, you know that the thread will turn into a self righteous anti abortion, pro abortion religious opinionated one.

My advise as a mother of two that spend many days fighting the system until my children finishing grade school,

Homeschool if you can do it, the education system is not Worth it when it comes to keeping their business and bias to themselves like you see here in this boards with religious topics.

You are the parent you are the one that has the right to teach your child you own values not the bias one of agenda ridden organizations, they are only resposible for teaching basic but that is not their business anymore as you can see.

Good luck.





[edit on 13-3-2008 by marg6043]