My daughter is breaking my heart!

Why can't kids understand that everything is not perfect all the time? Maybe I'm at fault, maybe I painted the wrong picture for her? Doesn't much matter, I can't go back and change one single thing that would make anything better for her right now :bnghd:

[edit on 2/5/2008 by jensouth31]

Sorry Jen, that you are having problems with your daughter.

I don't know what's going on right now. But, I hope things will get better for you soon.

Oh no, honey! It's never, ever your fault or the elders who have been there and done that in the past! Each brat has the free-will to choose a path -- for better or worse -- in an otherwise imperfect world. If everything were indeed perfect ALL the time, then we'd be, well, in heaven.


[edit on 2008-2-5 by pikypiky]

Hang in there jen. I know firsthand that it can be hard for everyone given the situation. Just keep telling her how you feel and perhaps she will understand...... if not now, she will someday. If you need to talk, I'm just a U2U away.

Sorry, dear Louise! If its any consolation at all, boys are even worse!!!

I hope things will work out and keep your chin up

Call me or email me if you want, that's what friends are for!!!!!

Take care~

Thanks guys, I'll be all right. *grits teeth*

There are some things I simply can't tolerate, and disrespect from either of my children is one of them.

I can so relate with you there. I don't believe any parent likes their children to disrespect them. I get very frustrated when my kids disrespect me. I am trying very hard to teach them their manners for each other as well as their elders. However, sometimes I do feel like I'm on the loosing end.

I always love seeing young babies and, even, little children and wondering how long it will take for them to be "corrupted" by the world. It's sad, even while I admire them for their cuteness and etc., I can't help but think that, eventually, they will be "corrupted." To what extent they will be "corrupted" is all the difference (whether it's very small things or very large things). Am I wrong to think this way? Do any agree with me?


:shk:

[edit on 5-2-2008 by they see ALL]

Between you and I...you do know what this is about Shar.

Any disrespect needs to be met head on, and swiftly, that's the only way to deal with it. I have a few years on you

Originally posted by they see ALL
I can't help but think that, eventually, they will be "corrupted."

She's 20, and this has little to do with corruption per say, but it has a lot to do with intentionally hurting someone emotionally...who knows, maybe it's all the same thing?

Originally posted by jensouth31
She's 20, and this has little to do with corruption per say, but it has a lot to do with intentionally hurting someone emotionally...who knows, maybe it's all the same thing?

Age doesn't matter. She could have been "perfect" until now. What I mean by "corruption" is, actually, just that (well, it includes that). "Corruption" is just anything "evil" (to any degree) that one does. It's the world's fault, not the person. I think the world, meaning society, "corrupts" most/all people (to an extent). Lying, cheating, stealing, and hurting are all examples of this "corruption" (but there are more). Is my philosophy right? Who knows. I hate to be a pessimist, but I think I am on to something.




[edit on 5-2-2008 by they see ALL]

I do know what you mean. What she did, she did to me personally and my first instinct was crying...I then I got mad, Mad and MADDER and I lit into her like a stick of dynamite.

Jeeze that sounds familiar, Jen...

...and this too shall pass. Sounds trite as all get out, I know. Kids are, well...dumb at times, and do occaisionally need their heads handed to them on a platter.

Keep on smilin'.

If she did something to intentionally emotionally hurt you she may have felt you did something to her to deserve it.

reply to post by jensouth31


Hi Jen/

I can say that I can very much relate to you.....maybe to a greater or lesser degree, but I can sure relate to you!
By doing this :bnghd: it aint going to help!
You're only going to get a very sore head!


If you need to talk Im too, a u2u away!

helen

Jen, i would try to sit down with her and have a little chat. Tell her (I dont know what this is about) that you demand respect as long as she's under your roof and she's not making things any easier for you.
My dear Louise, i was never blessed with a daughter, i have two sons, but i'm here to tell you, wether they are 5 or 45, they will remain your kids for the rest of your life. They can get married, leave, and you will still be rewarded with all their triumphs and downfalls.
Kids dont understand, i never used to, but i do now.

You are very right to want respect, you deserve it. I get very hurt sometimes by mine, and since they are no longer home, they make demands on me still...

A little example: My oldest one who has custudy of the boy and girl, God love them, all they have ever seen is fighting and harsh words, came to get me under a snow storm last week because he didnt want to be home alone with the kids. They were driving him crazy. I said i couldnt go because i was sick...he stormed out mumbling and didnt call me for a few days! OH, the guilt i felt! :shk: The guilt made me sicker...of course, he came back a week later as if nothing happened with another drama. AND Louise, i cleaned his whole house, washed dishes, put up curtains in his house, the whole works! Later that evening the kids wanted pop corn and he made them each a bag and told them to go to their rooms.
Needless to say, all that hard work, me cleaning their rooms, was for nothing!!!....

Jen, I think kids today have a feeling of entitlement that we didnt necessarily have when we were kids. I dont know why this is. I feel bad for you, sometimes i wish i could just dissapear and see how they like it.

Anyway, i hope you can "get" to her, i know you and i am sure it will all work out- but remember, your ordeal of motherhood is just beginning.

I wish we could stunt their growth and have them stay babies forever.
How cute they were! All those hopes and dreams we had for them!
Wouldnt that be nice?

I'm just ranting here because i fully understand how they can make you feel.

I wish you well, my friend now and in the future.

Originally posted by ThePiemaker
If she did something to intentionally emotionally hurt you she may have felt you did something to her to deserve it.

You got that 100% right, she's just another victim of circumstance.

I don't know your situation personally but I know there seems to be something between many mothers and daughters that brings conflict between the two.

I get a lot of guff from my daughter and she's only 9. Gee, I can't wait until she's a teenager!

non no

nono no no no, its all grace, just pray for her soul and all will be good.


God loves simplicity.


peace.

I've got a lunch date with the kid today. We'll have to see what the day brings. Theres no doubt we need eachother right now, hopefully I can put some sunshine back in to her life