I know the Whore of Babylon

wasn't Jesus hanging around with a prostitue in the bible. learn from Jesus-fornicaters aren't all that bad, he even hung out with them.

So I say show her love. THe kind that comes with weird repetative sucksion, slurrping sounds of escaping trapped air. THat last one is probably going to get me in trouble.

I wish I could bassplayer, but this chick will take me to hell, she is so wild it's not even funny, she tried to unzip my pants in a movie theater one time like with 30 people in there!

Living the straight Christian life is so hard it's not even funny, if you only knew the times that i was so close to fornication. I better stop, I'm starting to tempt myself, dammit!

dude what are you doing. That is a sign from god. Many men prey for this, and you are being blessed with it. God wants you to do her. He is giving you a sign. Besides, don't take her to the movies take her to your room.

God will not send you to hell, he even left a loophole for just this sort of occasion. Just go to confession the next day, and ask for forgiveness you'll get it.

you know what bassplayer, you may be right brother!

Nah, but i still can't, it wouldn't be right.

I am not religious, but I have read the Bible. I don't recall a specific passage that forbids getting head in the Cinema......

Or, on a more serious note, a passage prohibiting sex for that matter. I do believe it is Catholic thing.. You can't shag anything unless it's male and under 10 years old...

This thread has gotten so dirty that the mods are gonna ban it!

[edit on 13-12-2006 by thehumbleone]

Sex is great.

The whore of babylon is just a story.

I say unzip her pants and see what she says.

If she screams, run.

If she screams over and over again, keep doing what she tells you.

Originally posted by thehumbleone
This thread has gotten so dirty that the mods are gonna ban it!

[edit on 13-12-2006 by thehumbleone]

tut, you Christian types. Why is sex dirty?

I should have never posted this, you guys are tempting me to shag her.

Give in the Dark Side of the Force.....


On another note, I have a question for you wierd religious types:

In order to do the horizantal tango, one must be married, right? what would happen then if there was a massive catastrophy and only young, single people were left to re-populate the human race and no one was a Priest?

Aha!

Gotcha...

Originally posted by stumason
Give in the Dark Side of the Force.....


On another note, I have a question for you wierd religious types:

In order to do the horizantal tango, one must be married, right? what would happen then if there was a massive catastrophy and only young, single people were left to re-populate the human race and no one was a Priest?

Aha!

Gotcha...

Well, one should be married, though i doubt that ever happens.

If there's no priest?

Well, then it's a shagin' party baby, Yeah!

Could you direct me to the part where it says "Before thy gets thy end away, thy must be married, Lo" in the Bible?

no, but i can tell you where it says "whoever looks at a women with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart".

Hmm, i guess I've already committed adultery with more than 100 women then?

Originally posted by thehumbleone
no, but i can tell you where it says "whoever looks at a women with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart".

Hmm, i guess I've already committed adultery with more than 100 women then?

Then what have you got to lose? Listen, as I said before, I am not religious, however, I do know that the Christian God is supposed to be all-forgiving. I also know that alot of what is in the Bible are the idea's of men, not God, or are from an outdated society 3000 years ago.

If you like her, go for it. If not, tell her. Don't hide behind the shell of religion when it is what is in your heart that matters.

I think, if there was a God, he wouldn't mind one bit if you really liked her.

I do know that the passage "whoever looks at a women with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart" is supposed to be for a married man.

Basically it is saying, "Dude, your married, you have a wife, you don't need to bone that chick. Go home and do your missus instead for she is the one you love"

Hows that?

you see, the thing is, i don't know if i like her or if i just like her body.

yeah give in to your passion. God will be right there watching you with a smile, saying "that's m'boy! now you know why I put all those nerve endings in your hooha!" And Jesus will be in the corner giving you the thumbs up.

Just don't let him actually get near your girl for he will try to seduce her with his 'powers.'
it's hard to compete with a guy who can literally make flowers and wine appear out of nowhere.

BTW if you get wierded out from the stuff that comes out of your hooha when you climax just remember that that is the REAL Jesus Juice. And that you aint going to go to hell for it. Just heaven.

Originally posted by thehumbleone
you see, the thing is, i don't know if i like her or if i just like her body.

Is she fun to be around? (apart from the repeated attempts to sexually molest you). do you think about her when she's not there? do you want her to be there when she is not?

If yes to any of the above, go for it.

From my experience, most men go for a woman for looks first, then sort of end up liking them after. Women are much more complicated in reverse.

Originally posted by stumason

Originally posted by thehumbleone
you see, the thing is, i don't know if i like her or if i just like her body.

Is she fun to be around? (apart from the repeated attempts to sexually molest you). do you think about her when she's not there? do you want her to be there when she is not?

If yes to any of the above, go for it.

From my experience, most men go for a woman for looks first, then sort of end up liking them after. Women are much more complicated in reverse.

Question1. ehh, it depends what you mean by "fun."

2. i just think about how she's sexually molested me.

3. I just want her to sexually molest me. JK

you like her. If you didn't this wouldn't pain you so much. And, you would have ditched her a long time ago. How old is this girl BTW.

GO for it. Don't be scared of your feelings for her, they might be some of the best feelings and times of your whole life.

And if you don't want her then I'll take her. Ill take her and do things....Naughty things that she'll like. If she thinks she likes you then wait till she gets a hold of me. She'll never comedown from the extacy I will implant deep inside of her.

Are you mad yet? Cause I'm gunna jack you girl if you don't move quick enough.

... ... ... I'll do it. I'll get on a plane right now. JK