I'm just TOO SHY...

I'm too shy to approach this girl I like. This is my ONLY problem. If I could overcome this, I would be SO much happier! Anyone have any suggestions? Please?

to overcome your shyness start talking to everyone. Like you see a stranger...just say hi and also talk to all kinds of girls...not only the hot ones...but also the avg and not soo good looking ones, they usually are easier to talk to because you have no sexual intentions there.

Anyways...do u have any classes with this girl? or see her often? Just ask her about homework..or if its not at school make a comment about the weather or her outfit..just small talk..to get her know you

if u want advice go to www.askmen.com

Pining from a distance is not healthy.

Get a group of people together (5-7) and invite your friend to come out with the group.

Repeat gradually reducing the size of the group each time. Eventualy you get to know her as a person and then you won't be so shy.

Otherwise get really hammered first and then ask her out when you are semi cogniscent. This will solve your problem as you will make a terrible ass of yourself and you will never go near her again! Danger! You could die of embarrassment the next day....

Originally posted by prophetmike
I'm too shy to approach this girl I like. This is my ONLY problem. If I could overcome this, I would be SO much happier! Anyone have any suggestions? Please?

I would suggest having a few beers than go talk to her. Don't get drunk or anything, just a little loose.

i'll tell you how i overcame my shyness. i was in the local library surfing the net, when i saw this cute chick across from me. so i asked myself, what if i ask her out for coffee right there and then! and i did.... eventually... i mean it took me half an hour to psych my self into doing it, but i did. and now i'm shy-free.

unfortunately, she said she had a boyfriend and shot me down because of this, but it still felt good to break out of my shell!

Jedi has the same problem. I can talk to anyone but her.

Well let's see if I can help, if she goes to your school (if you are in one) just try to talk to her,even if its a simple "hi". Try your best to be sauve,chicks like that. Don't talk to her about anything stupid or disgusting. Try to startoff a convo with a greeting and a litle "Hi I'm so and so" and tell a bit about yourself but not too much. And PAY ATTENTION TO EVERYTHING SHE SAYS,everything even if its dumb listen. But if your generaly shy around everyone make friends with other girls your not interested in, that should work.

Now if Jedi can follow his won adivce...

I'd mirror NC's advice...

Just remember though...the worst she can do....is say no...and you'll live. There are other fish in the sea....

Originally posted by JediMaster
Jedi has the same problem. I can talk to anyone but her.

Well let's see if I can help, if she goes to your school (if you are in one) just try to talk to her,even if its a simple "hi". Try your best to be sauve,chicks like that. Don't talk to her about anything stupid or disgusting. Try to startoff a convo with a greeting and a litle "Hi I'm so and so" and tell a bit about yourself but not too much. And PAY ATTENTION TO EVERYTHING SHE SAYS,everything even if its dumb listen. But if your generaly shy around everyone make friends with other girls your not interested in, that should work.

Now if Jedi can follow his won adivce...

wow spoken like a true clueless guy. try to act suave? i got news for you, about 90% of all females see right through that even at the highschool level and generally makes for a bad impression as you wind up "changing characters" later and start acting like yourself. you either have a smooth quality to you or you do not, its not something you can fake and get away with. and the other 10% you dont really want to talk to anyway unless you like incredibly obtuse females, you'd be better off talking to a rock.

although i'll give you points for telling him to listen, its the most important thing anyone can do. again you cant fake interest or attention for long and get away with it. eventually the real you comes out and she'll see how you acted before as just that, an act and females are not fogiving about that crap.

some people are shy and some females like shy guys, in fact for some its a turn on, i never had a problem getting the girls i was interested in 90% of the time. of course i never put on an act to be "sauve". lol

be realistic, be yourself, and introduce yourself. and BE HONEST. say "hey i'm (insert name here) and i've seen you around, mind if we talk?" simple honest, and usually effective. or some variation thereof will do. remember, dont be afraid because about the worst that can happen is she simply says no thanks. at least then you'll know whether or not to move on or stalk her until she gets a court order to keep you away. (kidding!)


women do NOT like acts, bull#ting or fakery, trust me, i've seen my friends make total fools of themselves.

Originally posted by prophetmike
I'm too shy to approach this girl I like. This is my ONLY problem. If I could overcome this, I would be SO much happier! Anyone have any suggestions? Please?

When I was in High School I never got asked on a date or to a dance, even though I was always being told how "pretty" I was. I was really shy and didn't talk to anyone I didn't know. I always thought that all the guys thought I was a geek and weren't interested in me. I found out after high school that the boys I was so self-conscious about were just as intimidated by me. So the whole reason I never got to go to a dance was just because the boys were too shy to ask me and I was too shy to ask them.

The moral to this story is that it never hurts to ask, but if you don't ask, there is a good chance that you'll wish you had. The worst thing she can do is tell you "No". If she's worth a damn, and she declines, she will be polite and kind about it. If she's rude or makes you feel stupid for having asked, she wasn't worth the effort in the first place.

Just be yourself and be respectful. Hopefully, fate will be on your side and she'll be just as excited to go out with you as you will be when you ask her out.

YOU'LL NEVER KNOW UNTIL YOU ASK!!!

Dude just talk to her. People are people male and female. Some are cool some are worthless. Believe me the Hotties are still normal women too. In fact depending on certain details the Hotties are often the ones who get skipped over cause all the guys are too afraid to say something to them. Then you see those same chicks a while later with some goof cause he had the "Testicular Fortitude" to approach her. That Goof could be YOU!!

The thing is just approach em' with a little confidence or sincerity. Don't "Play it cool" or something stupid cause they see through that B.S. Unless of course they are just a total dingbat, and then it doesn't matter much what you do, she'll say yes regardless. If she says something rude or laughs or something (almost never happens so don't stress), FVCK THAT HO. She isn't worth your time, trust me!! Besides, she's the one missin' out right?!?!? You're obviously diggin' her enough to put yourself in out in trying to get a date with her. You'd rock her world if she'd let ya, am I right??? So it's her loss if she declines.

If nothing else take it from me personally as a fellow "Shy Guy" now Free. Unless you want to be alone and waiting for destiny to hopefully make it around to you, get out there and start meeting people. Practice, cause it gets easier every time you do it. After a while it's no big deal.

Also watch the movie "Swingers" for further hints.

wow never thought a person who'd use a quote from plato would also use the phrase "F that ho".

:::applauds:::

that was deep, real deep. that really moved me and made me think.

instead of suggesting bitterness simply suggest "moving on". as catching an attitude over being rejected isnt going to change the fact you were rejected, in fact it will make her laugh at you and think of you as a loser who cant handle rejection. its called being a poor sport.

and its really noones loss as with each twist of the road of life there is something new to be gained just around the bend. checks and balances, thats what it comes down to.

ahhh im shy too man so don't worry, girls tend to like the shy guys (i think)

Originally posted by ThePrankMonkey
wow never thought a person who'd use a quote from plato would also use the phrase "F that ho".

:::applauds:::

that was deep, real deep. that really moved me and made me think.

instead of suggesting bitterness simply suggest "moving on". as catching an attitude over being rejected isnt going to change the fact you were rejected, in fact it will make her laugh at you and think of you as a loser who cant handle rejection. its called being a poor sport.

and its really noones loss as with each twist of the road of life there is something new to be gained just around the bend. checks and balances, thats what it comes down to.

NO....You don't reply "FVCK THAT HO". Or respond in any insulting way. That is just the attitude or whatever that you apply to the situation of a "Rude Rejection". Perhaps that was too non P.C. for some people.

Simply said just brush it off, or don't give it any further thought!! (Is that Better!) (I'll have you know Plato LOVED that phrase BTW. It's a little known fact!)

If you politely introduce yourself or ask someone out and they treat you like a freak or something. Who cares....They are not worth your trouble. (How is that?)

Originally posted by mOjOm
(I'll have you know Plato LOVED that phrase BTW. It's a little known fact!)

plato kept his pimp hand strong eh???

did he have a cane and large rimmed hat too with a ostrich feather in it?

all i'm saying is it's a negative response or even a feeling that doesnt do anything to change what has happened. so yes letting it go is about the best thing to do and move on.

and keep yo pimp hand strong!

:::laughs hysterically:::

Prank monkey I'm no Love Docotr, I did'nt expect him to actauly take my advice.

Your avatar disturbs the hell outta me Chirst almighty thats one #ed up clown.

Originally posted by mOjOm
That Goof could be YOU!!

That's the most sensible advice I've heard all week!

My advice - be yourself, make an extra effort, but don't try too hard, and take every chance you get. If you don't ask, you WILL regret it...and if all else fails, your good friend alcohol will lend a helping hand.

And for god's sake don't say anything stupid.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

By the way, what does it mean when a really hot girl knows you want in her pants, and you don't think she likes you, but she's still talking to you and being nice and smiles at you? (that ain't normal for me). In this totally hypothetical situation let's assume that you and this girl wouldn't consider each other close friends...

And for god's sake don't say anything stupid.

Ahhhhh......Yes yes yes!!!! Now that is some good advice there!!! I forgot about that one!!
Very important lesson that I learned, finally before too much damage had been done. Many guys when nervous or whatever talk more and joke around more as a way to ease stress of the moment. DON'T DO IT! You'll end up saying stupid things and at minimum end up as her goofy nerdy friendish person who's too immature. Think before you speak. Better yet, get her talking and listen and be into what she has to say!!
Someone wise once said, "It's better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to open your mouth and prove it."

By the way, what does it mean when a really hot girl knows you want in her pants, and you don't think she likes you, but she's still talking to you and being nice and smiles at you? (that ain't normal for me). In this totally hypothetical situation let's assume that you and this girl wouldn't consider each other close friends...

It means, and I may be wrong, that even though she has no plans of hooking up with you, she likes the attention of being attractive. Or she's just used to being thought of in that way and just isn't going to be rude or snobbish about it. As long as you aren't a pig about it either.

Originally posted by mOjOm

By the way, what does it mean when a really hot girl knows you want in her pants, and you don't think she likes you, but she's still talking to you and being nice and smiles at you? (that ain't normal for me). In this totally hypothetical situation let's assume that you and this girl wouldn't consider each other close friends...

It means, and I may be wrong, that even though she has no plans of hooking up with you, she likes the attention of being attractive. Or she's just used to being thought of in that way and just isn't going to be rude or snobbish about it. As long as you aren't a pig about it either.

That makes sense to me...and I'm not being a pig about it, I'm being so damn nice it's giving me headaches. Must be nice, non threatening, funny, composed...and your quote sums it all up perfectly, you really have to tread carefully in casual conversation.

Well, I want to thank all of you for your advice. I just want to say to those who mentioned alcohol, that I'm a senior in High School and I don't touch the stuff. Thanks, anyway. mOjOm- Thanks for your deep advice earlier. That was the best advice anyone has given me in a long time. She goes to school with me and is on one of my classes. Even though I've known her since 1st grade, we don't talk much, but I'd like to change that. If anyone else has any more advice, feel free to give! Thanks, everyone!

The way I look at it, if you don't overcome your shyness you will kick yourself so hard for it later. Girls like confidance, so you need to appear confidant. Just treat her like a normal friend, then gradually you will feel more comfertable in her company and talking to her. She won't bite! Well I hope not. Actually, maybe that wouldn't be so bad eh!

For real though, I have a song that would help you, it's called "The Ten Mack Commandments" Just play it cool, relax a little, be friendly with the girl you like and see how things go.

One of my close friends has alowed his shyness to totally destroy his sexual life, do not let yourself turn into him, it is completely in your hands, don't let yourself down.