Can we keep wiccans as pets?

Originally posted by Tinkleflower
Wow.

I had NO idea that humour-bypass operations were a) so popular, and b) so obviously successful...

Or that it would be so easy for some to look the other way as long as it wasn't aimed at them or one of their pet groups.

just so no-one gets their knickers too twisted over this great site, I'd just like to mention that it is a PARODY. I love this website just because it must really really tick the fundies off.

parody...

God bless America and all it's godly chillun.

I got 13 wiccans pickin' cotton myself and all they ever eat is wormwood extract which is a godsend cuz them bollweevels jest hates wormwood stink.
They's a happy bunch though, whut with their nekkid skycladding and sweeping big circles out in the back 40 every full moon. I jjest wish they'd stop catterwallin' so much every solstice.

unparody

It'd be even funnier if I hadn't been Wiccan for 8 years....

I'm a fully coven-initiated Wiccan, my friend.

I spent the best part of my 20s learning about this wonderful religion.

So...sorry, but no go.

Even I found it funny.

I do NOT advise keeping a Wiccan as a pet. I had one once and I can assure you it was no walk in the park. I was constantly having to follow her around, cleaning up the demons and three fold karma that kept boomeranging around the place. Just try sleeping at night while she's sitting in a large, candle lit pentagram and a ghoulish fiend of a spirit is going "GHHAAARRRRR...."

After I dropped her off on a lonely country road and drove away it still took me months to close all the open portals to hell she left behind.

Never again, I told myself. Never again.

Love and light,

Wupy

I have a few wiccan and pagan friends, they are not bad people, they are a bit strange but interesting none-the-less...

Damn, if Wiccans are locked up, what do they do with us Devil-Worshipping rock music addicts?

Originally posted by Tinkleflower
So...sorry, but no go.Even I found it funny.

I think its pretty commendable that centurion1211 would find it distasteful that a group (that he might've been expected to not necessarilly be very fond of no?) would be singled out, even if just for the sake of humour. Heck, he's technically defending you, albeit unnecessarily

Centurion
What a bunch of hooey. I just got back from a thread where you posted a picture of a bunch of muslims and said something to the effect of "I know what my enemies look like."

And you have the nerve to come on this parody thread and get all self-righteous and critical of other people?

That is the height of hypocrisy.

When you manage to only spew hate in parody, I'll give you a cookie. But as long as you continue to spew it for real, you'll get nothing from me.

Hooey. Hooey I say.

and Nirvana I liked that post got me about 20 mins of laughing

Thanks. I'm gay, and I used to practice Wicca. It amazes me some of the things that people believe, and some of the things they say. One time, I was at Borders. There was this gay couple looking at a book on Wicca. A woman saw them looking at the book, and she told them that "Wicca is okay, but magic is bad." She said some other things that got my blood boiling. I was tempted to talk to her, but I didn't because I knew if I said anything it wouldn't have been nice.

Originally posted by WyrdeOne
I just got back from a thread where you posted a picture of a bunch of muslims and said something to the effect of "I know what my enemies look like."

It was photos of the 911 bombers. Not 'just' random muslims, for what its worth.

But you are right, they don't look like anything. The people arrested in this new attack include, what, two jamaicans. Richard Reid wasn't even part arabic. Neither is Jose Padilla or Johhny 'Jihad' Lindh. Hell people thought that the guy that the London Metro Police shot dead 'looked south asian'. He was Brazilian. And he definitly didn't look pakistani. Looks are meaningless. The guys doing the attacks look more or less like everyone else, they don't dress like muslim fundamentalists or anything like that.

I love that site, specially their theories on how Noah's son used fying dragons to gather the animals in earth for the ark.

And that Adan's sons had dinosaurs for pet.

Be nice people wiccans are great people.

Marg
I'm glad you've seen landoverbaptist for what it really intends. It's a lark and I love it for that too.
I sure am happy that humor still lives in this PC world, how about you?

About those Wiccans...I've actually had a strange experience with a 'coven' myself. Being interested in how they conduct their rituals prompted me to follow a full year with a coven as an active member and I must say that the complete cycle (or, round, if you will) was fascinating as well as enlightening. Some very meaningful insights came out of it and, on the whole, I don't regret doing it at all. I never stayed with it, though, and after the year was done, I thanked them and was on my way.

But...not before they attempted to involve me in a 'Pyramid Scheme' to the tune of $5000. This was a low point for me and soured the entire experience.

So...bottom line (?)...not all Wiccans are so wonderful.

On a side note...I never understood how spells affecting others could sit well with the Wiccan Rede. Some of those spells were nasty nasty nasty and they thought it was perfectly ok to do so.

Sorry to get serious on this magicckal thread...

Originally posted by WyrdeOne
Centurion
I just got back from a thread where you posted a picture of a bunch of muslims and said something to the effect of "I know what my enemies look like."

Show me the thread where I supposedly posted that picture and comments. Wait, I don't recall any such post, but I see Nygdan has done some research for you, and also managed to insert some truth (picture was of 9/11 hijackers) that you conveniently left out.

Intentionally falsifying would make you a liar. Hopefully, it was just an "oversight" on your part.

[edit on 7/28/2005 by centurion1211]

Originally posted by marg6043
Be nice people wiccans are great people.

And they make great pets! Thats the thing, they make great pets!

Centurion
Oh #, my bad. I wrongly attributed that post to you, it turned out the be a post by LA_Maximus when I went to quote it. I apologize for falsely naming it as yours. Now, that being said..

You didn't disagree with it on the thread. The fact that you moderate hawks don't do more to stop these fundamentalist terrorists among you makes you equally culpable, according to the popular morality.

Isn't that right? All the moderate muslims need to do more to stop the terrorists, otherwise it's their fault when we bomb them? Well, if you're a moderate hawk, you need to do more to stop your brethren from endangering people with their behavior, otherwise you're responsible for it, and people will target you.

See, that doesn't make sense to my sense of justice. I don't think it's right to attack you just because you failed to stop someone of similar persuasion from doing something bad. So I apologize to you, and ask that you see my point as it relates to punishing the masses for the sins of a few. Don't think you can destroy islam, and don't think you can convert them all, and don't think you can subjugate them as punishment for the behavior of some of their number.

So, once again, I'm sorry I attributed it to you, and sorry to the thread author for the tangent. Back on topic I go.

The topic, by the way, is satire. The moment wicca became a modern cultural trend, purchasable in stores at the mall, it became subject to parody and satire. Christianity is fair game as well. Muslims get their share too, fairness is ensured when nobody is exempt. From PARODY and SATIRE. Which is different than honestly expectorated vitriol.

I'm sure you can tell the difference, you just choose not to when it suits you.

Once again, the accuser is guilty.

Edited by Esoteric Teacher for being not so well informed (by GOP):

It seems everything but the first sentence is totally wrong, sorry if what the republicans and democrats led me to believe has offended you in any way.




[edit on 08/12/71 by Esoteric Teacher]

Thankfully, if you do manage to overfeed your wiccan, and they do explode, their entrails are transsubstantiated into glitter and colored streamers, so there's no mess, no clean up.



Who says there's no evidence of intelligent design?

Can we keep wild ones?

We need to make a wiccan trap and entice them in.

How about putting a pentagram on the ground with a rope in the middle tied to a bent tree.

When the wiccan wanders into the pentagram to perform a spell, they end up swingng from the tree by their ankle!

Its got to be a winner!!!!

.
This homo didn't even know there was an 'official' homo handshake.

guess you can learn something new every day.

If i catch a right wing Christian, can i lock them away in my basement?
Are they good barbequed?
.

This homo didn't even know there was an 'official' homo handshake.

What I find so fascinating about this "homo" hand shake is that you don't need to verbalize who is going to bottom. My question is what if both people want to top or both want to bottom. Hell, I didn't even know that people were still using the terms "Man/Boy" and "Woman/Girl".

Originally posted by WyrdeOne
Thankfully, if you do manage to overfeed your wiccan, and they do explode, their entrails are transsubstantiated into glitter and colored streamers, so there's no mess, no clean up.

Hey I want a refund!!!

I was once married to an overfed Wiccan, and he jolly well didn't explode, and there were definitely no signs of glitter and coloured streamers!

I'm most upset.

To whom should I complain?

I want my glitter, goshdarnit!

(disclaimerville: I practiced Wicca for a good portion of my adult life. I still hold it to be one of the most beautiful religions out there - when it's not surrounded by a bunch of Silver Ravenwolf-induced hooey - but yes, I do find the glitter imagery to be...more than a tad funny!)