Energy or empathy or both?

I am writing this in hopes of finding those more knowledgeable or at least more experienced than I that could give me some advice or insight into my situation. (Going to see a therapist is not the type of advice I am looking for, but I realize it is sound advice, nonetheless.)
I am usually a private person but in my small circle of close friends I can’t find anyone who can grasp the ideas that I am dealing with here. So I am going to put myself out here for all of ATS to dissect. Please be patient I promise all of this information will lead somewhere.

Most people in my acquaintance find me to be a “calming” person. That is to say, when they are around me, they are calm. Particularly, if we are touching. I have several nieces and nephews, and when I hold them or hug them they become very calm, as in contrast to their normal state of constant energy and hyperactivity. It receives comments constantly. My friends have noticed it if we are hugging, and my mother mentions it frequently when we are holding hands. Actually, people go out of their way to touch me, kind of like a personal worry stone. (Yes, fortunately, I do happen to like my friends and family.)
When my boyfriend and I go to sleep at night I have noticed that if I am touching him in some small way, merely my foot on his leg, he falls asleep much more quickly and sleeps more soundly. Also, he has night terrors. In his case, it is where 10 - 30 minutes after falling asleep he wakes up panicked and fearful. If I am touching him, this doesn’t occur. And if I touch him just after it occurs, it will subside and he will not pace the floor for hours. I frequently feel slightly more energized when others feel more at ease. I know this sounds like energy vampirism, but my gain in energy is truly marginal. Some times I try to send people a calm energy; I do not know if it is possible to send it constantly. Or perhaps, my energy signature is a calming one.

I also have accurate insight into peoples personalities. I know things about them that I shouldn’t know. Generally it falls into the good person/bad person generalities, but sometimes it is much more specific. An example is a man who lived down the street from me when I was a child. He had 3 children. The oldest was a girl and two younger were boys. One boy was my age. Our families are friends and so I visited their home from around age nine to thirteen. I knew from the first day not to trust the father. Not to be alone with him, I knew he would hurt me. Come to find out he is now being brought on molestation charges of his daughter and his granddaughter. My mother remembered me telling her when I was nine, that I didn’t like him and he was a bad bad man. I have had this with complete strangers. People who I had to leave a building because they were so bad. The oddest incidence of this was driving along an interstate and a man driving on the other side of the road. I was nearly ill in my car from the feeling of him. A true evilness. A red 4wd 4dr Toyota Tacoma. It can still give me the chills.

To briefly list some other the other, less pertinent things, I frequently know when some one has died before I am told. The earliest event was when I was three and knew my grandpa had died, before anyone was told. I know when someone is lying to me. To say I am good with animals is putting it mildly. I seem to be particularly interesting to infants. ( This one is sort of weird to me.) They will stare at me or even my picture for hours. It is really disturbing when you are sitting in a restaurant and an infant at another table stares at you the whole time. Even while the parents are trying to feed them or play with them. I get weird looks from the parents a lot. I am still trying to figure that out. I know what people are feeling most of the time. If I pay attention, I can tell if they are upset or hurt or being vengeful or if they are lonely. This makes me a great friend usually.

The thing that happens to me that I wonder about, because I can find no other information on is this: There are many times that I am overcome with emotions that are outside of my own personal life. Grief, fear, so intense all I can do is scream and cry. The first episode of this I can remember is Christmas night, 2003. Almost the same time as the devastating earthquake in Iran. That one was so bad the tremors wracked my body for 30 minutes. I had smaller somewhat less traumatic ones after that, until this last Christmas night. When the tsunami hit Indonesia. I had convinced myself up until that point that it was nothing. But to have correlated this breakdown in emotions to those terrifying events seem to point to something else. When it occurs it feels as those my heart is being ripped out. Some nights it feels like pure unadulterated terror. Like the most vicious cruelties are happening to me. Some nights it is a grief and anguish. Some times a hollow emptiness. Many times I can glimpse images with them but they are so fleeting that I can make anything out. Sometimes, I can get a feeling for what I think to be happening. It hits me any where from once a week to once a month.
I have no personal traumas to identify these feelings with. Truly, I have never had an event to cause me to feel these things in my own life. I wonder if I become overwhelmed with my sense of empathy or if I am absorb these energies. I pray that if I am, that the people who are suffering these torments are gaining a brief respite from them. That I am making their lives a hint lighter. A little less bad.

But to come around to the point of this posting (and yes, amazingly enough there is a point), does anyone have any kind of experience or knowledge that they could or would share with me on this. I am trying to learn more about myself and become more adept with these feelings, but I am having troubling finding any information that is truly helpful. There is information out there that is useless at best. I truly am looking for constructive commentary not condemnation for being something that is not understood. Sorry if this has bored you stiff and thanks for reading.

- amarenell

I know this is way off topic, but not really. I am empathic. but, I have blocked out the ability for a very long time now. Every once in a while the barrier falls, albeit unwillingly, and i am assaulted with all kinds of emotions and thoughts that arent mine. Sometimes i used to be able to tap into it, but now it only rears it's head when i least expect it. I am wondering if anyone can tell me how i can consciously bring down this barrier when i want to, so that i may better explore this gift/curse/talent (whatever you want to call it). Any suggestions?

What you have described sounds like you may be an empath. Here is a link to a site for empaths:

The Universal Empath

In addition to this (or maybe because of it), you can also detect changes in earth energy. There is a woman who is called on by the government because she is so accurate with earthquakes, she can identify the region it will take place with which part of her body is feeling discomfort. I heard her on Coast to Coast one night, but can't recall her name.

Agreed, I too am an empath, and at first it was too much for my mind to be able to see/feel what others are, but pretend thay are not.
It is a gift, but to learn how to control it for only positivity is difficult, especially when in a forum on the net.
Just be happy you bring such comfort and ask the blessings of the White Light to lead you..

Seems like you may be a Telepath. Empathy is more "incoming" as I describe my abilities with telepathic qualities.

But you are projecting energy so you could also be an Empath at a higher level then you realize. Meaning you just dont feel the bad, you seem to able to recycle and send it back as Tranquility.

Out of anyone, the babies know. Their minds arent polluted so they see you and your energy at face value. Goes the same for animals. I think your journey begins there. You might want to test the waters with people who are mentally ill. You can read up on that here on a different post but we are looking into the connection. We feel that people at different levels of mental illness are operating in dual or possibly more realms. Your energy will shine through the boundaries and be most recognizable.

I hate people touching me too, dont even tell me people have been getting a quick fix from me.

Originally posted by Annunaki
Sometimes i used to be able to tap into it, but now it only rears it's head when i least expect it. I am wondering if anyone can tell me how i can consciously bring down this barrier when i want to, so that i may better explore this gift/curse/talent (whatever you want to call it). Any suggestions?

I think you have to stop being so conscious about it.

I block out alot (during waking hours at least) for my own reasons but its still there and it can come through whenever, its more like ignore. I practice on the people who check into my hotel. Simple, sometimes amusing, sometimes creepy. Just by being there so close.

The best thing is to simply be around people. No matter what you've blocked. Other energy is always there projected from others, especially the Evil, Heart Broken and Frightened. You just need to become receptive again. You were young, you blocked. so you'll be starting over at level 1 so to speak. Start with people one on one, babies and animals. It's all about experimentation.

i tried this thing last night after posting on this thread. I get visited by the shadow people quite regularly, though it is rather unnerving. Last night i knew one was within my presence, i just didnt know where. I tried "letting down my guard" and when I did, it felt like i nearly had a seizure. whatever they feel, or whatever they think, my body could not handle it. but at least this tells me that those things are indeed very real, but on a more mundane aspect, it tells me i havent completely lost control of when i can and cant tap into it.

Annunaki

That is wonderful for you to know you have control.
The shadow people interest me alot. I haven't had much experience with them. I know when they are around by this intense feeling of unease that settles over me. I don't know if it is my all too human reaction to something outside the realm of normalcy for me, or if their presence emits this sort of energy.
How are you aware of their presence? I would like to know how others sense them.

Sounds to me more like an empath. A telepath is much more specific information. Most empaths also have telepathy, but it's usually spotty, and with those they are closest to mainly, though occassionally a stranger on the same wavelength happens along....

Most empaths often project as well as receive. This is the "calm" that she radiates for example.

As for HOW to control it better. I don't think there is any hard and fast rule... What works for some, may not for others. For me, it was just like anything else...with practice, comes proficiency....

since I got pregnant with my first son, I've been trying to block out "stuff"
I have been given amulets, mantras, chants, prayers, spells, whatever you want to call them, all work with some success but of course that is dependent on my belief in their power to work.

I don't think anyone with this ability can ever fully "turn it off" I do a good job of blocking it, but it requires a conscious effort, sometimes more than other times.

If you want to "turn it on", basically all I do when I want this, is to ask for protection and guidance and then allow myself not focus my thoughts on anything in particular and "stuff" never fails to come thru.

I can't say I have control though, stuff still happens when i don't want it to and it can be quite unnerving. Hopefully with continued years of practice I might get it right.

and yes, you are an empath, my husband hates to sleep without me, he also suffers from night terrors. I usually sense when one is about to come on and if I touch him right at that moment, he evades it. I also have "baby/young children" touch, I can make a collicky baby quiet in minutes, I have had several 2am visits from friends with infants.

miscreant - Thank you for the link. It is a nice place to start looking for answers.
Gazrok - I understand the need for "practice practice practice", it just seems to take so much time.

I suppose more than anything I just need to not feel so alone. My locale does not provide me with many who can even consider the possibilities, much less discuss them. When you try to explain why you are breaking in to crying fits, and everyone looks at you like you have lost your ever-loving mind, you start to believe them.

I have to say though that I don't seem to have a problem using it for only positivity, as siriuslyone suggested. Even on an internet posting board.

There are times when I do get specific info from people but it is always what is foremost in their mind. Not anything far into the recess except for personality traits. Those are very evident in people I meet. So I too would lean more toward empath than telepath.

Worldwatcher, I am always a favorite at family reunions for that reason. Fortunately, none live close enough for late night visits to be a problem. . Is your husband appreciative of your assistance, or even aware of it?

I do appreciate the all responses. It means alot to me to have somewhere I can go to ask questions and possibly have them answered in some way shape or form

he's very much aware of it, I think i freak him out sometimes but he should be used to it by now. I would love to know what he experiences when I touch him during his dreams, but either he doesn't want to tell me or he really has a problem remembering dreams. My husband encourages me with my spirituality, but he claims i'm enough spiritual for the whole family and doesn't like to discuss or entertain certain ideas, especially the paranormal.

To say I am good with animals is putting it mildly. I seem to be particularly interesting to infants. ( This one is sort of weird to me.) They will stare at me or even my picture for hours. It is really disturbing when you are sitting in a restaurant and an infant at another table stares at you the whole time. Even while the parents are trying to feed them or play with them. I get weird looks from the parents a lot. I am still trying to figure that out. I know what people are feeling most of the time. If I pay attention, I can tell if they are upset or hurt or being vengeful or if they are lonely. This makes me a great friend usually.

lol.

Funny when you don't particually like the type of animal and they seem to get all cosy with you as though you love them, or should do. Can't dislike dogs like I used to. And babies... what is it with babies?! I don't mind but they just stare lol. wish they talk or something.

To be honest, and I know this is weird, I was messing around with my new cuz and he laid on his back, upside down (not that that means anything) and I caught a menacing glint from him, twice, enough to make me jolt back... look again, and jolt again! 8( ... it was a look I'm used to as I can show it myself at times, innocent/boyish - malovant type look. It scared me.. kinda, too cute a kid to be scary but odd at least. Love kids. They're the only ones that keep eye contact with me or visa versa, some even dare me on after noticing TRYING to make eye contact. (I seem to have weird eyes btw, can do fun things if you're female *wink *wink, lol)

I suggest hiding in a lead encased room. Wearing gloves and a pyramid shaped foil hat... the hat is real, haven't tried it but logic says its a good deflector. It all depends really, sometimes I feel as though I've 'gone too far' even though I can't control it.

Do you want to further yourself? Or are you seeking explanations? I wrote about my thoughts on empathy in another thread. If I can find it I'll be glad to post it up for you, just tired right now.... Meditation works wonders, listen to the static or try for complete silence.. I think the static can be tuned into (try humming near a busyish motorway, you always tune into one motor or another) buy hey thats another topic, if anyone can make sence of it

Emotion = Energy btw... If you can feel it, its energy, you feel their energy and can change it. Try breathing excersises, change your own energy and those around you.

Please keep this topic going! Would be good to hear more I'm just sooo tired. Need a cigg

Peace!
Drift

[edit on 18-5-2005 by The Drifter]

You seem to be a natural healer.Maybe you would want to get some auras picture taken or someone who can see auras.You should have a dominant aura of indigo if i did not guess wrongly.and maybe some white light coming out of your crown chakra.You probably is vibrating at a higher vibration thus is able to lift or influcene the people around you when you touch them.try to maintain the feeling you are having and try to improve on them,you will lose them eventually if you do not maintain it.

one more thing to add is that our auras will change base on our thoughts,so if you have a dominant aura that is good,try to maintain it.And maintain your way of thinking.If i did not remember wrongly...our aura will change gradually base on our everyday thoughts and emotion.and you will see a major change in your dominant aura in about three months or so,it is important to maintain it.

But then I realized that I've been dropping signs of my own psychic/empathic nature all over the place since I got to ATS.

Originally posted by amarenell
I am usually a private person but in my small circle of close friends I can’t find anyone who can grasp the ideas that I am dealing with here. So I am going to put myself out here for all of ATS to dissect.

I can relate to this part completely, which is why I generally stay away from these conversations, at least in reference to any experiences I may have myself. I'm a very private person by nature, and I generally stay within my inner circle of friends as well. Sometimes we must branch out and reach beyond our own self-imposed borders either to find the help we seek or to render the aid that is needed. Hopefully you can learn a little from each of us who is willing to come forward.

Years ago I learned that the only way to gain any measure of control over what I felt from others, and over what I "broadcast" was the same as Gazrok has already said. Practice, practice, and more practice.

We all have a different path to take in our quest for learning about our abilities, amarenell. I learned to screen out others' thoughts and feelings by learning how to focus my own. Meditation helped me quite a bit with that, and I'm grateful to my Cross Country coach for starting me down that path when I was in high school. I learned to find inner peace and learned how to gather my own inner strength in that way.

I've learned that a lot of my strange abilities can be traced back to my empathy in some way. I've always been very sensitive to different energies and emotions around me, sometimes sharing experiences of someone else close-by. Animals, particularly cats, seem to like me more than most people. I've had people tell me that their pets don't like people, only to have them walk over to me and curl up in my arms or lap, falling asleep in moments. And though I have no desire to have children of my own, I've found that babies seem to have a fascination with me. Makes it easy to babysit during those exceedingly rare circumstances that call for it.

Gazrok said:
Sounds to me more like an empath. A telepath is much more specific information. Most empaths also have telepathy, but it's usually spotty, and with those they are closest to mainly, though occassionally a stranger on the same wavelength happens along....

My own experiences with telepathy are also just as Gazrok stated. And when it happens, it happens in a big way, it seems. I've only really been telepathic with a few people, usually that I've found myself to have an unusual connection to when we've met. Generally speaking, they've been female, psychic in some way, and most were also either pagan or wiccan. This doesn't mean that I've only shared that kind of connection under those circumstances, of course. It just seems to be prevalent for me to find those connections.

For example, about five years ago, I was online one night and felt a general "pull" to a chat room. Turns out that there was a girl there whose presence I felt as though she were sitting next to me. Why did I feel her presence? Because Kris lived about two miles from me at the time. She sent me an IM asking if I was the one who was looking for her, and so we started chatting.

We became good friends, and we both learned to share our energies, even at a distance, in attempts to "boost" one another's healing when we would be tired, sick, or injured. Eventually we did drift apart for a little while once we both actively worked to dampen our connection (waaaaaaaaaaay too much was coming through for both of us), but she has now graduated college and is rediscovering her old ways, and with that, her old gifts. So once again, Kris and I communicate. I missed the buzzing in my brain from her hellos.

I consider that kind of bond to be something beyond special, beyond romance, beyond friendship -- it's almost intoxicating on some levels. I've been fortunate enough to share it with a short list over the years. As another example, Kim, the witch who gave me the name The Demon Hunter, was one of those special bonds. I can only describe it as "a buzz" in my brain when I feel their presence -- feeling their energy, I suppose. Over time I've learned to differentiate who is who, depending on the feelings I get from each. Kris gives me pins and needles, radiating up my neck into my brain and back again. Kim was always hot and fiery, like I was cast into hell or something when she was around, and I suppose that made sense given our relationship. And yes, there have been others -- some current and some I don't have in my life anymore.

Now I realize that all of this may seem unrelated to your questions, but the point I want to make by mentioning it all is that these are my experiences, which came about from the way I shaped my abilities, through practice and experimentation. Decide what you want, what role you want these gifts to play in your life, and that will shape what you can do. The mind is a powerful tool, amarenell, as anyone here can tell you. How you make it work is up to you. The energy is there for you to use, like an artist using their paints to create the masterpiece of their life's work.

So too can we mold our own abilities simply by working on different aspects of how we view or use the energies around us.

I wish you the best of luck and that you find the knowledge you seek. Good journey on your path.

Where would one go to get aura pictures taken? In my neck of the woods, this is not something in which many show interest.

Also, I was wondering if anyone else has any particular exercises that are useful in their experience? I know that the Drifter mentioned the use of static noise and breathing exercises. Are you using visualization during the breathing exercises. Meditation is useful for almost anything. But does anyone find a method to be more effective in focusing empathy. Any certain visualization that is productive? Are middle eastern philosophies or pagan tenets more useful? Or is it merely one's preference towards such distinctions?

I know that this is kind of repeating myself, but I really do live in an area not know for its metaphysical tolerance, so any information I gain is either through my own experience or reading about others' experiences. And let me say, I read ALOT. I am just trying to find which reading material might be most beneficial to my growth and understanding.

I feel wistful reading about your experiences with others, TheDemonHunter. You are lucky to have found others with whom you can share this part of yourself.

Now I am going to go off on a tangent, but I would like to state in advance that I really would like to receive response to the above stated questions.

I was sitting at dinner tonight in a restaurant in my home town. A couple at a table near mine was talking loudly and without meaning to I overheard their conversation. I really wished now that I had turned my ears off. The girl was fussing at the guy for something he did. This was it: he and some of his friends went into the woods with the express purpose of finding a squirrel. They went in and shot a squirrel out of the tree and placed it into a homemade cannon. They did not kill the squirrel when they shot it, but I am assuming it died being shot out of this cannon. I was appalled, to put it mildly. I was in the middle of a bite when I heard this. It took all my willpower to swallow that bite. But what was worse was that the girl wasn't chastising him for doing this to the squirrel she was upset because he killed it and didn't eat it. But his response to her was how about the frog that she and her friends tortured and killed. I didn't want to believe I was really hearing this. I started crying right there. The depravity that occurs around us is astonishing at times. They didn't even stop to consider the fact that torturing innocent animals was cruel, just not eating them afterward. I would have said something to these people if I had had a smidgen of belief that it would have made any impact on them whatsoever. The overwhelming part is that things like this and oh so much worse are happening around us constantly. We can do all we can to make the world better, but is it enough? How much more can we and should we be doing?

I apologize for bringing the mood of this post so low, but I was nearly overtaken with grief by the thought of this. I knew that if I didn't get this off my chest, I was going to be low for a long, long time. I truly hope that by unloading myself I did not transfer it to some one else.

Well I hate to reply after my own previous post, but seeing as this is not seemingly read by all that many people anyway, I suppose it won't be too much of an irritant.

I had another episode, night before last. I was driving home and started feeling pain. Sharp agonizing pain. It actually feels more like pressure on my body that I know is brutal pain. Severe and terrifying. My teeth started chattering with the force of these feelings. I knew that somebody was in terrible pain. It felt young. There was anger. I kept trying to send the thought that whomever this was should take my calm, let me have their pain. Repeating it over and over. I would take the pain. And then all of a sudden it stopped. The hatred well up inside of me. I knew that some one had caused this. Someone had died.

I tried to calm myself but I was so angry that I sent my anger out to the person who had done it. Don't know who or where, but I did. I felt so terrible. I try so hard not to inflict pain, but I couldn't help it. I wanted them to suffer. It was a child they had hurt. Had killed. I don't know if this did anything or not. It was my first time to ever try. Hopefully, my last.

About eight minutes passed and then I was overwhelmed with the feeling of grief. Grief so intense that it shook my body. Screaming grief. My body rocked back and forth on its own. Same as the teeth chattering earlier. As though I was mimicking anothers motions. A mother's grief. It was terrible. No words can express the black maw of grief experienced. It was spotty because she didn't want to feel better. She felt she deserved it. She felt it was her fault. Maybe, maybe not, but I did what I could to ease the insanity creeping up behind her caused by the overwhelming loss. But I did not take it away, she wanted it. I don't have any right, whether needed or not, to take away something another truly wants to feel.

I know that I really should not be sharing this much of myself on an internet forum board, but I really do not have anyone I can share this with. It leaves me very melancholy and drained to experience it, and it help to relieve some of the pressure to write about it, since i can't talk about it. I mean I suppose I could get a therapist, but all I would feel then is that I am crazy AND broke.

On a side note to this. This is not the first time I have experienced this while driving. The amazing thing is that I never lose control of the car. I sometimes go blind with the feelings but the car is always at perfect speed and never over the lines. Perhaps this is pure luck. If it is, I hope it holds out. Also, I realized this time that I can truly tune out to these occurences, but how can I not help someone in pain? How can I, in good conscience, igonre their suffering when I might could ease it? Maybe someone else can answer that, because I haven't found an answer yet.

This is for the 18 people who have looked at this since my last post, I have an update on my last episode. This is kind of painful.

I had a feeling that if I wanted to know about the incindent I should look in today's paper, first page of the B section. There it was. A nine-year old girl was walking from her house across a dark road to a friend's home and was struck by a truck. She died shortly after being struck. Her mother was at home at the time and came out to find her dead body.

This happened fifteen miles from the location of my episode in an almost straight shot. The odd thing is that it happened almost an hour exactly after I had it. I had always assumed it was a feeling I got when these bad things happened, not before.

I don't know who the anger belonged to. Perhaps, the child for being taken early, perhaps the driver at himself for not paying enough attention.

When the mother's grief hit me and I was rocking back and forth I saw a mother holding her child in the middle of the road. I thought I was trying to fit the pain to an image instead of it being natural. I guess I was wrong and should not have overlooked it. So often that happens, that my original thought is almost always right.

I don't know what to say about it. It is odd to actually find confirmation of my episode. To know where to look to find out about it. I kind of hoped after this last one that it was all in my imagination. I didn't want to really see death. Feel death. But the most devastating part is that I saw it ahead of time. Now I am plagued with questions of, could I have stopped it, is there any point to this? Or am I just to be tormented by pain that I can't help ease?

Seeing as I am of little interest here, I doubt I will be posting again. It is bad enough to be ignored in the flesh much less in cyberspace. Don't get me wrong, if some one replies, I will answer, I just highly doubt the likelihood of that happening. Of course now someone will try to prove me wrong. Thanks.

By the way, I know a lot of people say things that are false or made up but I truly am not. But you don't have to believe me one way or another. Thanks for reading.

know that this is kind of repeating myself, but I really do live in an area not know for its metaphysical tolerance, so any information I gain is either through my own experience or reading about others' experiences. And let me say, I read ALOT. I am just trying to find which reading material might be most beneficial to my growth and understanding.

No matter where you are, we are there, what an area is 'known for' means nothing since we represent the 'unknown'.

While you can learn much yourself, especially in the pagan areas, you need people. What you need to put it bluntly, is a Wiccan 'Earth Mother', to help you find your balance. I know what you are going through, been there, am there.

Walk outside, look up, and tell the Universe it is time you met people who will understand. Then walk back inside and continue your search. Travel if you have to, there are many places where all sorts of groups make their presence known.


A.T
(-)