One strike and you're out

My youngest Son is 26, never been married or had kids, so he's still in the dating world.....and getting a bit fed up with it. He said that dating is getting be a pain in the ass, because women his age have been convinced they're a Princess and you have to take them to the most expensive restaurants and then some club expected to spend hundreds of dollars on the first date. I talked to him last night and he was telling me about a date he had last weekend.

Let me give you a little important background : He drives a Silverado 2500 HD. It's a damn nice truck, with heated/cooled leather seats, sun roof and all that stuff. It's a 4 wheel drive, but not lifted and while it sits higher than a normal truck, you don't need a ladder to get in, just a small step up.

So, he meets this girl a couple weeks ago, they talk and he asks her out. She said yes and for the next few days they call and text and she seems pretty nice....until...

He goes to pick her up and as they're walking out she stops and say "You are taking me out in a truck ! ? " and says it it a disgusted voice. Then follows with "I'll go this time but if you're going to date me you're gonna have to buy a car".

He said "Dad, she didn't even make it to the driveway, I told her never mind, got in my truck and took myself out to dinner".

His Mom and I gave him advice when he started dating. She gave him the usual "Be a gentleman, hold her doors etc, etc and I agree with that.

I gave him the Dad version.

# 1 - No matter what she does, what she says or what she tells you, always Always ALWAYS wear a condom. Kids are expensive and you're too young to get married or pay child support.

# 2 - Get to know her. Before you pop the question, live together for a year. BE PICKY. Remember, a marriage license will cost you $30 - A divorce will cost half of everything you own.

I know that sounds cynical and a bit of an asshole, but it comes from past experience. I got taken to the proverbial cleaners and I don't want to see him have to go through that.

I feel sorry for young people today trying to meet someone compatible to live a life with.

a reply to: DAVID64

His experience reminds me of the pet food commercial where the gal questions keeping 'dog food' in the fridge; the guy says it's not dog food, it's pet food. She replies 'It's DOG food' in a disgusted tone, so he shows her the door.

Your son dodged a bullet while saving a lot of time AND money.

The right girl for him is out there somewhere just waiting; all you can do is hope he doesn't 'settle' for the wrong one before they meet.

a reply to: DAVID64

I dont understand these girls. Also questioning why your son would have to buy a car hehehehe let me guess he picked her up from her parents house because she has to live with them due to student debt and can't afford her own car??!?

I'm like on the downhill side of mid 30s and just testing the waters again of dating and I do not let them pay for me or drive me anywhere on a first date. I just feel like on a first date especially making the guy pay for me can possibly set up false expectations for the guy if you know what I mean. Also two reasons I dont want them to drive. I had a really bad scary experience with someone I KNEW driving me somewhere before so I generally drive myself at all times.

Also I dont wanna be trapped if I want to leave the date, I want to leave and I dont want to be at the mercy of some man to get me home or have to PAY for an Uber or whatever to get home because I'm way too cheap to pay for that when I have a perfectly working automobile.

It just seems to cheapen these girls. They're like..........wanting the man to pay for the pleasure of being with them and that isn't the point of dating. That isn't always safe either because some guys not very many but you dont know when its a first date or you don't know them very well some guys are just deranged and you don't know that until you spend some time with them.

originally posted by: DAVID64
My youngest Son is 26, never been married or had kids, so he's still in the dating world.....and getting a bit fed up with it.

wow..don't know what to say except your son did the right thing. I don't know about his other dates but whomever that was is just an entitled twit who doesn't deserve the unconditional love of a dog much less a good guy.

a reply to: Shoshanna

From what he told me, she seemed to think a truck was beneath her and just not fancy/expensive enough. [ If she actually knew what those cost she'd change her mind on the expensive part ]

Also, my Son drives a truck for 2 good reasons . He likes trucks better than cars and he's a big guy. 6"3' - 275 lbs and fitting in to a car he has to fold like an accordion and it's not comfortable.

a reply to: Shoshanna

Hey Sho, I'm sorry to hear things didn't work out with your marriage. Having a young child and testing the dating waters at the same time isn't exactly easy. Wishing you the best with that.

For the OP, that's two very good pieces of advice. You might think it sounds harsh but it needs to be said. I wish someone would've beat point #2 into my head years ago. Luckily I got out of it before we were married but it was still costly.

a reply to: DAVID64

His whip is on point, his reaction to her attitude was on point, your advice to him was on point, everything about this topic is on point. Bravo.

She doesn't want a boyfriend, she wants a sugar bear, a backup in case her dad doesn't give her what she wants. Have to be careful around these little girls in the body of a grown woman, they seem adult until they open their mouth. Your son could invest in some affordable beater (like a jeep or even a tractor LOL) he uses exclusively for dates just to gauge their temperament and philosophy about relationship values.

I agree with your advice and with his response to her. Location is everything as well. Where I live a pickup would make the girls happy and some expensive would get a shoulder shrug. Might even get a "You should get a truck".

originally posted by: DAVID64
My youngest Son is 26, never been married or had kids, so he's still in the dating world.....and getting a bit fed up with it.

Your son likes hi maintenance women but searching for a budget girl. A lady is on the inside not the outside, So your son obviously isn’t the problem here is he lol.

a reply to: Digital1010

Lots of Rotten Apples out there before you find a Nice Sweet Ripe one.

a reply to: DAVID64

originally posted by: nugget1
His experience reminds me of the pet food commercial where the gal questions keeping 'dog food' in the fridge; the guy says it's not dog food, it's pet food. She replies 'It's DOG food' in a disgusted tone, so he shows her the door. .

Those commercials are great. I love the 'expression' on the dogs faces during the commercial when they know they are insulted and they look at the insulter and then to the pet parent and they wordlessly say 'what are you going to do about it!!".

FUN.

Bravo to your son!
He needs a tomboy (are we allowed to call women that these days) who doesn't worry about getting muck under her finger nails..... and knows something about cars/trucks!!!
He'll walk into a repair shop one day..... and there she is! Then shocks him on their first date when she's all scrubbed up and wearing a dress!
She's out there somewhere, he just might be looking in the wrong places.
Rainbows
Jane

originally posted by: DAVID64



He goes to pick her up and as they're walking out she stops and say "You are taking me out in a truck ! ? ..."

This is an easy one for me.

That's all the further she would have gotten with me, and my response would have been..."NOPE!"...and I'd have gotten in my truck and left her standing at the curb without a another word.

Life's too short for that kind of bullsh!t.

edit - LOL! I just read the rest of your OP (I wrote my reply as soon as I got to her initial statement). It sounds like that's pretty much what your son did! LOLOL! Good for him! Screw that noize.

🤣🤣🤣

a reply to: DAVID64

Neither you NOR your son needs to apologize for driving a truck!

I drive a truck because I'm proud to drive a truck, and that's all that matters.

Your OP is funny because 'way back when', when I was in the dating scene in my college years, I used to have this old beat up 1974 Ford LTD station wagon with a rattle-can ivory white paint job (and my (nice) truck). My friends and I affectionately called it the "Ghetto Battle Cruiser". I would intentionally go pick up 1st dates in the GBC just for exactly the reason your son experienced! Got that crap out of the way right up front!!!!!

"You'll ride in the Ghetto Battle Cruiser and like it!! Oh, and we're goin' to 7-11 for dinner too, bay-bee!! We'll see where things go from there."

🤣🤣

P.S. - Man, I loved that car! A whole elk could fit inside the back of the GBC, if you folded down the rear seat. I know this because I did it once! LOL! Used to love taking that thing to a fancy restaurant and having the valet park it. Thing could hold about (12) people in it if you folded up the two rear-most facing seats. Wasn't four wheel drive, but if you got that ol' girl going fast enough it'd go damn near anywhere!! Had a 455 cid Ford big block in it too. Drove it all the way to Florida one time to pick up a 19,000 lb, 26 foot boat, and towed the boat all the way from southern Florida to western Wyoming. The GBC was bad-ass, man!!! LOL!

Maybe he should of just called her bluff about a second date in the truck, probably never been in a truck like that before and it would change her mind after going for a drive in it. Relationships are hard work at times, dealing with someone in a #ty mood is part of the gig.

It is tough seeing that side of someone early in the relationship. In some ways it is better than seeing that side of someone later in the the relationship as things become more entangled.

Then again, maybe she is just an ignorant, spoilt brat and better to keep looking?

Being able to work through these kind of problems is important and what makes the difference in something that lasts or something that does not.

a reply to: kwaka

It's not rocket science to identify the type of woman who regards herself as the table and you as the bread winner. She holds all the leverage and decides all the rules and is loyal to your wallet, not your heart.

Hard pass.

originally posted by: Flyingclaydisk
a reply to: DAVID64

Neither you NOR your son needs to apologize for driving a truck!

I drive a truck because I'm proud to drive a truck, and that's all that matters.

Your OP is funny because 'way back when', when I was in the dating scene in my college years, I used to have this old beat up 1974 Ford LTD station wagon with a rattle-can ivory white paint job (and my (nice) truck). My friends and I affectionately called it the "Ghetto Battle Cruiser". I would intentionally go pick up 1st dates in the GBC just for exactly the reason your son experienced! Got that crap out of the way right up front!!!!!

"You'll ride in the Ghetto Battle Cruiser and like it!! Oh, and we're goin' to 7-11 for dinner too, bay-bee!! We'll see where things go from there."

🤣🤣

Great minds...

a reply to: DAVID64

Reading that made me realize something.

She didn't even want to "date" anyone.......she just wanted a nice ride and a free meal. She NEVER wanted to actually "date" someone with the purpose of getting to know them for a relationship in the future.

That's what people like your son are up against. People who present themselves as one thing when in reality they are something altogether different. In this case, she presented as "datable" when in fact, she never was.

All of which gives rise to the question........just how many women out there, I.e., percentage wise, are really just not "datable" anymore? You son may see 100 "single" women a month out there. It's altogether possible only a small percentage are actually datable. The rest are posers looking for freebies.