What if Greta Thunberg woke up to her perfect world?

I saw this heavily sarcastic, absolutely poignant, thought-provoking post on LinkedIn today, and had to share here. (The author is an automotive technology professional who encouraged anyone to share if they wanted to.)


One morning in Sweden, a girl named Greta Thunberg woke up to a perfect world, one where there were no petroleum products . She tossed aside her cotton sheet and wool blanket and stepped out onto a dirt floor covered with willow bark that had been pulverized with rocks. “What’s this?” she asked.

“Pulverized willow bark,” replied her fairy godmother.

“What happened to the carpet?” she asked.

“The carpet was nylon, made from butadiene and hydrogen cyanide, both made from petroleum,”.

Greta smiled, acknowledging that adjustments are necessary to save the planet, and moved to the sink to brush her teeth where instead of a toothbrush, she found a willow, mangled on one end to expose wood fibre bristles.

“Your toothbrush?” noted her godmother, “Also nylon.”

“Where’s the water?” asked Greta.

“Down the road in the canal,” ‘Just make sure you avoid water with cholera in it”

“Why’s there no running water?” Greta asked.

“Well,” said her godmother, who happened to teach engineering at MIT, “Where do we begin?” There followed a long monologue about how sink valves need elastomer seats and how copper pipes contain copper, which has to be mined and how it’s impossible to make all-electric earth-moving equipment with no gear lubrication or tires and how ore has to be smelted to a make metal, and that’s tough to do with only electricity as a source of heat, and even if you use only electricity, the wires need insulation, which is petroleum-based, and though most of Sweden’s energy is produced in an environmentally friendly way because of hydro and nuclear, if you do a mass and energy balance around the whole system, you still need lots of petroleum products like lubricants and nylon and rubber for tires and asphalt for filling potholes and wax and iPhone plastic and elastic to hold your underwear up while operating a copper smelting furnace and . . .

“What’s for breakfast?” interjected Greta.

"Fresh, range-fed chicken eggs,” replied her godmother. “Raw.”

“How so, raw?” inquired Greta.

And again, Greta was told about the need for petroleum products like transformer oil and scores of petroleum products essential for producing metals for frying pans and was educated about how you can’t have a petroleum-free world and then cook eggs. Unless you rip your front fence up and start a fire and carefully cook your egg in an orange peel like you do in Boy Scouts.

“But I want poached eggs like my Aunt Tilda makes,” lamented Greta.

“Tilda died this morning,” “Bacterial pneumonia.”

“What?!” interjected Greta. “No one dies of bacterial pneumonia! We have penicillin.”

“Not anymore,” “The production of penicillin requires chemical extraction using isobutyl acetate, which, if you know your organic chemistry, is petroleum-based. Lots of people are dying, which is problematic because there’s not any easy way of disposing of the bodies since backhoes need hydraulic oil and crematoriums can’t really burn many bodies- being used on the black market for roasting eggs and staying warm.”

a reply to: TheSkepticGuy23

For one week, I wish these idiots would get their wish and live with no petroleum products just like in that story. They whine over big oil, but let them actually have to do without it's benefits and see how fast they beg to go back to normal.

For what it's worth, the vast majority of petroleum products, oil and fuel for vehicles included, with plastics, fibers, fabrics, etc., can be produced from hemp.

On that note, the words "oil" and "plastics" are still present there, so I'm sure they would be by the wayside in Gretatas perfect bubble world.

Cheers to Greta Thunberg!

Embrace the call of nature, my friends.
Who needs indoor plumbing when you can simply relieve yourself behind a bush?

Here's to a future filled with post-apocalyptic parties, hemp clothing, and the occasional outbreak of the bubonic plague.

🍺

a reply to: TheSkepticGuy23

since it is a finite ressource she will one day wake up to that world, because it will run out during her lifetime.

lol

so instead of whining maybe better start working on better alternatives than this car mechanic can think of.

First they came for the socialists, and I did not speak out—
Because I was not a socialist.

Then they came for the trade unionists, and I did not speak out—
Because I was not a trade unionist.

Then they came for the Jews, and I did not speak out—
Because I was not a Jew.

Then they came for me—and there was no one left to speak for me.

WHEN NO ONE SPEAKS UP

originally posted by: Annee
First they came for the socialists, and I did not speak out—
Because I was not a socialist.

Then they came for the trade unionists, and I did not speak out—
Because I was not a trade unionist.

Then they came for the Jews, and I did not speak out—
Because I was not a Jew.

Then they came for me—and there was no one left to speak for me.

WHEN NO ONE SPEAKS UP

yea, but make sure you know what you are talking about first. Speaking up and being a tool and not understanding the big picture might make you a hero to other DERPs, but those who can think and use logic, understand that long before you eliminate your key source or power, you should have a VIABLE alternative already working.

Jesus Christ I cant wait.

a reply to: Annee

originally posted by: network dude

originally posted by: Annee
First they came for the socialists, and I did not speak out—
Because I was not a socialist.

Then they came for the trade unionists, and I did not speak out—
Because I was not a trade unionist.

Then they came for the Jews, and I did not speak out—
Because I was not a Jew.

Then they came for me—and there was no one left to speak for me.

WHEN NO ONE SPEAKS UP

yea, but make sure you know what you are talking about first. Speaking up and being a tool and not understanding the big picture might make you a hero to other DERPs, but those who can think and use logic, understand that long before you eliminate your key source or power, you should have a VIABLE alternative already working.

Big mouth tools.

Come in all sizes and political bias.

originally posted by: FurPerson
so instead of whining maybe better start working on better alternatives than this car mechanic can think of.

So then... where would be be if the MASSIVE investment in EVs had been directed toward other initiatives to reduce the environmental impact of transport, such as...

Internal Combustion Engine & Light Duty Vehicles: a study published by ScienceDirect finds that emissions and consumption can be reduced by up to 80% by focusing on engine & mechanical efficiency, and weight reduction.

Hydrogen Combustion Engines: Why not use the most plentiful fuel in nature? Toyota is experimenting with nitrogen oxide capture to eliminate 90% of the emissions.

Fuel Cell Vehicles: this one stumps me the most. EV's without the need to exponentially increase grid capacity, or environmentally toxic production.


But in reality, if the US were net-zero tomorrow, it would a weak fart compared to the super-cell winds of coal from India and China.

The most environmentally conscious decision any person can make is to not reproduce. Lets see if she can stick by that one and ignore the biological clock imperative. Not really likely though. An "oops baby" is the way that one's generally got around.

originally posted by: TheWhat
The most environmentally conscious decision any person can make is to not reproduce.

Nikola Tesla apparently claimed everyone could have free energy until they silenced him.
But we would still need petroleum products even with his free energy.

a reply to: TheSkepticGuy23

why is that your answer to me is my question to be honest?

reduce the environmental impact of transport...


But in reality, if the US were net-zero tomorrow, it would a weak fart compared to the super-cell winds of coal from India and China.

in between that you lost me I am afraid.

I was talkiing about stuff like certaiin corn polymers(?) can be used to make hygenic wrappings for food. all the plastics in beauty and other wash stuff can be reduced or replaced, your floor could be made from agricultural/plant waste almost the same attributes as your linoleum.
All our petrol based fertilizers could be made from human waste if we had better loos.
Exhaust was nowhere on my mind when I wrote my post.

originally posted by: FurPerson
I was talkiing about stuff like certaiin corn polymers(?) can be used to make hygenic wrappings for food. all the plastics in beauty and other wash stuff can be reduced or replaced, your floor could be made from agricultural/plant waste almost the same attributes as your linoleum.

But can it all scale, and scale with minimal petroleum requirements?

Exhaust was nowhere on my mind when I wrote my post.

But, it's everywhere. Diesel engines are required to harvest plants for plant-based polymers. The processing consumes (currently) more energy than that of equivalent plastics production... which likely means fossil fuel electricity production.


Yes, there are replacements. But the carbon impact of production at scale barely offsets (if at all) the harvesting of oil.

originally posted by: RazorV66
Nikola Tesla apparently claimed everyone could have free energy until they silenced him.

Even the most staunch supporters/experimenters of the Tesla Generator admit that it can't produce enough power for more than a couple 100w light bulbs (when it works, and with a conductor 1,000 more conductive than copper), much less an entire house.

Not to mention the petroleum to build, and install wind turbine farms. Not including the fact that the earth is now scared for thousands of years by digging, flattening, and building mounting pads, power line routes and roads. She should come see the disaster of those out west, not including the destroyed scenery.

a reply to: TheSkepticGuy23

I am not saying I have the solution. But I'd be very pleased to have a H3 mine on the moon.




or even better: a fully functional fusion reactor.

Why do we care about the opinion of some propagandized kid? a reply to: TheSkepticGuy23

Was just wondering about your poo comment. We have a composting toilet, and we use the resulting compost around our timber and fire wood trees. But we do not use it to fertilise our vege garden. The reason is because of how many drugs two people in the house take for all their aliments, not to mention visitors who take the pill and other such hormonal blockers or adders, etc. My question is, how would they remove all of the drugs and hormones out of the waste before making it your said fertiliser?
Very true about the ability to replace so many petroleum products with other natural sources, like you said. a reply to: FurPerson