Covid-19 Community Support and Mental Wellness Thread

I had breakfast for supper today. Corned beef hash with a fried egg on top.

Finally got around to mowing the front yard. It seems that some are energized out of boredom to get compulsive about chores. This has not been my experience.

I loved this.

www.youtube.com...


And this stunner:

www.youtube.com...

Hey folks.

Once again, just checking in to say that I hope all of you ( readers and posters alike ) are holding up as well as can be expected.

I know that in my own household tempers are fraying and keeping the peace is becoming rather trying. Emotions are high and everyone seems on edge.

Hopefully y'all are faring a bit better. I am even if my environment is a bit of a minefield.

Hang in and hold on folks. Nothing is forever and this will pass.

a reply to: Hefficide

Out of 5 people in my house only one has a job they are allowed to have..

hint.. Its not me.



but.. My bank account just went from like 11$ to over a 100 times that much.

I can breathe a bit easier.

Warning in advance this one may be very hard as I have tried many ways to get an answer to this problem. Not sure if anyone else has had this problem. My Turbo tax refund was put on a Debit card. The card is a Intuit Visa and although I have set a 4 digit PIN the ATM s do not accept my PIN ..... All ways to reset the pin number seem to be down as far as I can tell. (phone numbers and web site ect.) I am hoping that it may be something that may be being worked on and will be fixed but I am unsure of that also. Any help will be appreciated.

a reply to: Hefficide

Thank you Heff. I wish strength to you and your loved ones

I just wish that people would not be scared. I know i am, but i was scared most of the time even before the pandemic.

Fear can lead a person to make foolish decisions. Take my word for it.

a reply to: bluemooone2

normally resetting your pin is pretty easy i once dod it at an atm cause I forgot it. I hav'nt tried to do it in this current websites sucking balls climate though.

I was worried my money wouldnt even show up.
I have the same type of card from my tax return. luckily I still had it. I don't particularly recommend them as their customer service sucks on a good day.

I guess the main good thing is it really is turbo. Many times if you do direct deposit from work everyone is waiting till atleast thursday. friday the earliest for paper checks. but I always got mine wednesday.

then I had an issue that needed fixed and read reviews... holy hell.

anyway their normal system for changing pin numbers is the easiest fastest thing ive ever used for something so sensitive. is it their website down? or app? I know their servers must be destroyed right now.

good luck lemme know



and btw the card works fine with credit without a pin. unless you just need cash for whatever reason.

I had quite a dream last night..

The dream started with me being with my dad (passed away) in some some sort of underground facility. I would say a mine, but that was only part of it, and Civilization might be a better word than "facility." But, I didnt see that right at first. My dad seemed to be some sort of authority figure.. However, it became clear that the people around me were dwarves (of the mythological variety). The first.. "hint" was that a man I was talking to had a thin beard growing from his nose. Not nose hairs as we know it, but about from the middle of the bridge to the tip. Quite rangy.

I tried to fit in and work, but it didnt go so well. It seemed I had brought my health issues into my dreams. I very rarely dream, but when I do that can happen. I was dodging some types of forklifts, and eventually just started to try to stay out of the way. This went on for quite some time, trying out different jobs, etc. One miner said something about a body embedded in the rock as a warning of possible dangers. I asked where, and was told just to my right in the thin area we were in. When I looked, sure nuff, there was a petrified body there. Not a "gross" thing, just fascinating.

I eventually remember looking at some sort of display of geological treasures. Incredibly beautiful stuff like geodes and other specimens, but many of which were not like any I have actually seen while awake. Off and on through all this, my dad would pop in and check on me. He seemed.. genuinely and truly happy. More than that, he seemed fulfilled.

Eventually I found my way to some sort of break area, or maybe even living quarters. There, I found a lady that I was rather fond of. She was showing me something like our electronic tablets and seeing if I could fix it. I could not.. Though I didnt get too much time with it. I have an odd confidence I could have fixed it.

Time went on a bit, just spending time and laughing.. Then I remember myself sitting on the ground with her embracing me from behind, her head resting on my right shoulder. Still messing with the "tablet" a bit. While awake, this seems a bit strange as I feel like the time spent with her was maybe only days or a week, but in the dream it seemed rather normal. Where we were sitting was basically right next to a busy work area. She randomly asked me "whats your lifespan?" To which I thought (rarely have thought processes in non lucid dreams) 'well, thats a bit of an odd question. Im pretty sure dwarves live a long time though.' So, I responded "oh, not that long." There were a few moments of silence, then I noticed she was weeping. Very openly, and increasing in volume. I thought (again, unique) 'oh, this is sure to go over well with all these burly damn dudes working around here.' However, I realized I didnt really care too much, patted her left hand that was around my chest and leaned my head into her cheek. No idea why she was crying.

But, then the dwarves around us joined in the embrace one by one. No questions asked, no talking, and many literally dropped what they were doing to join in. And then they began to hum. Maybe a tune, maybe not. I got the impression that it was not necessarily a common happening, but clearly wasnt something that NEVER happened. One of the most beautiful things.. Staggeringly, unimaginably so.. No idea why I would be allowed to be party to such a thing.

At this point, my stepmom broke in, with a few members of the family, and said something about "changelings" and how we must go visit them, and not have them "take" me. To make sure of this, she told me her favorite meal to then relay to her after the meeting to make sure it was really me.

I was rather distressed that she had interrupted whatever was going on with the dwarves. Still am, even awake. However, it seemed important, so I went.

Before I left though, I turned to the lady and simply stated "thank you for.. your time." I got the strange impression and thought (again, but this was the strongest one) that I should go for a bow and add "m'lady." I cant remember if I did, but I lean towards no. I get the impression that her status there was an open secret of sorts, but I dont know what that status might have been.

Sadly, it seemed that it was a "hurry up and wait" situation with the changelings. My stepmom was eating, and in a booth to our left (we were in the open, still seemed underground), I noticed an arm reaching for food. I immediately knew it was one of my grandmas (stepmoms mom) and then it all gets a bit garbled while my body was waking up. When I did wake up, there were tears in my eyes and as I took a few of my first bumbling steps (you know how it is..), I mumbled "I hope we meet again m'lady." Which.. just seemed to pop out as if some extension of the dream. Even now.. I hope we do so I can try my hand at a polite bow. Never really tried before! Or, if Im honest, never really considered bowing to anyone even as a polite greeting. I mean, I guess its not really a thing anymore, but even in contexts where it might be fun or appropriate (renaissance fair!).. Thats not where my mind goes.

From my first "health event" (diagnosed as a seizure, but Im not so sure) I can probably count the number of dreams Ive had on both hands. Thats over a time period of decades.. Before that, it wasnt just a nightly occurence.. I pretty much lucid dreamed all night every night. Many seem to go for flying with a lucid dream, but I can tell you.. There is a lot more there. A LOT more. We can build entire worlds, and watch them rise and fall over eons. Design entire civilizations from the ground up, and observe them flourish or fail on their own.

Regardless, since then, very few and never lucid. And even there.. They tend to be something like the dream equivalent of "noise." No cohesion, etc. Just random disconnected images and sounds, and every time I wake up with a headache. To say that this dream was unique in that regard would be an understatement. I felt a depth and cohesion that I hadnt felt even when I dreamt frequently, lucid or not. It didnt just reach that level of feeling "real," or the next level of feeling "deeply impactful and something that stays with you," or even the next level of feeling "Important". It reached beyond that to a level Ive never felt. No headache (first one in decades).

Highly strange, incredibly wonderful, sad.. And it somehow feels like I just interacted with a society and people in ways I havent even imagined myself. I have always read a lot, specifically scifi and fantasy, but the part I found neat is that what I experienced was not in any book.. And not at all like I imagined such a people might be in even my wildest flights of fantasy. It was all so much more down to Earth ( ), and yet, more wild and foreign.

I debated whether to actually post any of this. Some feels a bit.. private. I do believe there is much more to dreams than just our brain decompressing, but Ive never really figured out exactly what that "more" might mean. Or if it really even matters. Even so, I figured that if someone is struggling a bit, or isnt struggling at all, that it might capture their imagination like it has mine

a reply to: Serdgiam

Thanks for posting.
Like a whole movie!
It’s good you posted for posterity.

a reply to: spacedoubt

Thank you

Back when it was actually relevant to keep a dream journal, I found if I didnt write it down.. It all just kinda.. dissipates and dissolves. Quickly, at that.

Then, I figured Id throw it here in case it inspires something or another. In the past few years, Ive really discovered just how random the things can be that precipitate ideas and creativity.

Jumping back in to add something.

Yesterday was a bad day for me personally. Last night I went into the kitchen to get a healthy snack, saw that a massive bowl of Easter themed Hershey's Kisses had been put out by somebody and, in my funk, decided to eat a ton of Kisses rather than the usual carrots / broccoli and blue cheese I went in to grab.

I woke up this morning feeling like I'd taken a whole bottle of antidepressants. Even now, 24-ish hours later, I'm not at all sure I can feel depressed.

So add "magical chocolate" to the list of home depression remedies posted pages back.

I'm a healthy eater and avoid sugar and junk, but, going forward I think chocolate will be something I eat from time to time - specifically if depression flares up.

originally posted by: Phage
I had breakfast for supper today. Corned beef hash with a fried egg on top.

Finally got around to mowing the front yard. It seems that some are energized out of boredom to get compulsive about chores. This has not been my experience.

Shocker.

Its just a joke. Lighten up Francis!

a reply to: Hefficide

Somehow now that you gave your tacit approval, I think im seeing the light.

In moderation of course.

I think my Sertraline dosage increase has helped me. (maybe)

I went from 100mg to 150mg about 6 weeks ago, and now my negative/suicidal thoughts have massively decreased, but now just feel kinda numb every day.


Will take numb all day compared to the other, as I find myself being able to 'push aside' negative thoughts much more easily now.

Although having your meds increased isn't always a good idea, I just wanted to highlight that option is there if needed.

Do your best to keep busy all 🖤

For a laugh...

GOVERNMENT SYSTEMS IN PLACE

Due to the current financial situation caused by the Corona Virus and slowdown in the economy, the Government has decided to implement a scheme to put workers of 50 years of age and above on early, mandatory retirement, thus creating jobs and reducing unemployment.

This scheme will be known as RAPE (Retire Aged People Early).

Persons selected to be RAPED can apply to the Government to be considered for the SHAFT program (Special Help After Forced Termination).

Persons who have been RAPED and SHAFTED will be reviewed under the SCREW program (System Covering Retired-Early Workers).

A person may be RAPED once, SHAFTED twice and SCREWED as many times as the Government deems appropriate. Persons who have been RAPED could get AIDS (Additional Income for Dependents & Spouse) or HERPES (Half Earnings for Retired Personnel Early Severance).

Obviously persons who have AIDS or HERPES will not be SHAFTED or SCREWED any further by the Government. Persons who are not RAPED and are staying on will receive as much SH#T (Special High Intensity Training) as possible. The Government has always prided themselves on the amount of SH#T they give our citizens.

Should you feel that you do not receive enough SH#T, please bring this to the attention of your TD, who has been trained to give you all the SH#T you can handle.

Sincerely,

E.V.I.L. Economic Value of Individual Lives

I wonder if I'll ever be able to eat out in a restaurant again. I'm immunosuppressed, and therefore have to maintain social distancing and masking for longer than most according to the stage/gateway recommendations. I think we're looking at months at least. However, I'm not sure we're ever going to get a vaccine or that long-lasting herd immunity will ever develop to this thing. And that, to me, means it may never be safe for me again.

Ugh.

And I have to clean the house too, and with severe lumbar and hip degeneration, this is about as fun as walking across a bed of nails. (I was on steroids for a long time with my first kidney transplant.) LIfe is just looking like a miserable, painful grind at this point.

Sorry I can't be more positive. I guess I'd better get off the computer and start doing stuff.

It is your Finnish strange dude here again.

Look, i am having a little bit better day. But the thing is, that all animals and all children are all close to my heart. I want to protect them and teach them things. I don't have kids because i am too irresponsible and i have lousy genes. But i have had a really good luck because my friends and family have kids and animals.

This is not about me this time, you have already helped me and i am truly thankful for it.

Kids... They can't go to kindergarten, they can't go to school. Their routines are broken. And therefore, i have been crying.

You ATS fathers and you ATS mothers, i take this opportunity to ask you for some neutral or positive things about your kids. How are they coping? Really my heart cries due to kids, who have all been put into this situation.

You are not alone.

I am not alone.

We are all in this together.

a reply to: drussell41

I don't know you, but I know your situation, as someone I love shares it.

I think it will feel safe for you again. What we are all dealing with is a an evolving reality, in which we feel more or less capable of adapting to it. This process will change all of us, and our procedures, even those who don't want to change, those who feel it is an imposition to change. Life is not static like that, although many of us have enjoyed the illusion for some time that life can be static. Change doesn't mean adversity, especially in your situation. Change can mean you adapting to a "new normal, or even boldy striking out and defining it yourself on YOUR terms.

I think there will come a time when you walk to a restaurant and maybe pause to steel yourself, and walk in. Perhaps there will be different processes, but the feeling and the comfort will be the same.

All of this, this history we are defining, is made up of all of us. …. And as ol' Granny said about memories... "Look backward fondly, but don't stare." ;o)