Covid-19 Community Support and Mental Wellness Thread

It’s been quite a few years since I last did this, so please bear with me…

Hi ATS!

For a number of years several members of staff would post threads like this from time to time. During the Holiday season and after incredibly traumatic events usually.

We often included terms like “mental health” or “mental wellness” in the titles of these threads as an inclusive message, not as an exclusive one. All who were struggling or having a bad time were welcome. All who felt alone, worried, afraid or confused could participate.

Though I have not drafted a title for this thread I suspect it will be the same as this thread is being created for those same reasons.

If ever there were a proper time for a thread such as this – this is that time… So this is that thread.

With that in mind:

Hi!

I am Hefficide on ATS and other places but my real name is John. I mostly am called Heff, here and in the offline world as well. I am happy to answer to any of those three.

It has been awhile since I have discussed it here, but I am a mental health patient. I was diagnosed with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder when I was eighteen years old. Over the subsequent years the panic attacks and anxiety grew worse, things compounded and several other diagnoses were added, primarily differing forms of depression – including Bipolar II.

At times it has been a tough battle to fight. I have had some incredible wins and some devastating losses in my own little war. I have let people down. I have let myself down. I have often failed to be the person I would like to think myself to be.

I have also overcome some incredibly difficult things.

Mostly I have spent a very long time learning not to be ashamed about any of that.

I have mentioned this about myself for that reason – because I understand the stigma and how it feels. To let any and all who read this know that it is not just them and that it is OK. It is normal and something many endure and can relate to.

Especially at times like this.

People with problems often find coping mechanisms on their own and from any number of things… Becoming a workaholic, becoming an alcoholic, staying busy and social at every possible moment so that they don’t ever have to be alone with their thoughts. Finding things to put into that empty place or to quiet the invasive thoughts can be incredibly difficult. Once a distraction is found, losing it can be devastating.

Covid-19, unfortunately, is making many of these things impossible. It is leaving a lot of people alone without their coping tools.

I imagine that even people with relatively minor issues, who have never previously had much of a struggle are finding themselves having a difficult time right now.

Uncertainty is not a comfortable thing. This storm hit fast and hard and we don’t yet know when it will relent. That is enough to humble even the strongest of us.

This thread is here to provide the ATS community a place to freely discuss their feelings. To vent their frustrations, concerns and fears. To seek out a bit of emotional support from others who might share and understand our worries. This is a safe environment where anyone who cares to can release some of their stress without having to worry about being attacked. Any uncivil comments or judgmental nonsense will be removed from this thread. This will not be a battleground, but a place of healing and sanctuary from the storm.

Please feel free to comment or post if you feel doing so will help you to some degree. Aside from the general idea that this is a community mutual support thread, there really isn’t a topic. Your thoughts and feelings will be respected. We have some amazing, truly amazing people in this community and I have absolutely no doubt that if you chose to reach out you will find many hands reaching back toward you.

We have been through so much together ATS. We will make it through this.

My inbox is always open to anyone here. I am a mess some or most of the time but I am always happy to listen and to do what I can to offer a kind word to all of you.

Thank you.

Heff

Nice thread!

It would be nice if we could put aside our political and ideological differences and stop the petty bickering and name calling. Yeah, there are a lot of things that Democrats/Liberals do and say that I disagree with, but now's the time we need to band together and put our differences aside. Things may get worse before it gets better and many people are stressed out over their jobs, health and finances. Lets stop the panic on the airwaves and in the grocery stores. Lets try to remain civil to each other. This "social distancing" is going to be tough for some, especially those who have been laid off from work, including our older citizens. If we're considerate and helpful to one another in our communities, perhaps we can unite this country, instead of tearing it apart.

a reply to: Hefficide

I just read where some people in California were calling the
police because they heard their neighbor's coughing.I wonder
if people will start calling 911 if I leave my house or sneeze.
This is getting really crazy and will further panic and hysteria.

I am needing to get a couple of my husband's prescriptions filled.
I tried getting them filled last week,the insurance would not let
me fill them then,it was too soon! I can get them now,but last week,
no!

I just had an unsettling experience in the UK. Local major supermarket, I just wanted some frozen veg (none left) found a head of brocolli and some carrots, but literally everything , I mean everything gone from the shelves. A young woman had a break down and burst into tears, they had to call an ambulance, seemed like a severe panic attack.

Not sure what the background story was, but maybe autistic or some other issues, lets not forget how frightening and confusing this can seem to people in the community who largely depend on things being consistent from day to day.
It was quite heartbreaking, she was really distressed.

a reply to: shawmanfromny

Well spoken. Cheers!

a reply to: mamabeth

I hadn't read that yet but would not be surprised if true. No matter what the situation there's always a few who end up in the news for using 911 for silly things. I wouldn't worry much - though if I sneeze and others stare at me like I am evil incarnate, given the current situation I'd understand it.

As for the prescription situation, I've experienced that exact thing. Was going on a trip and they refused to fill my medication two days early regardless of how many times I repeated that I would be out of town and if they did not fill it I would be without meds for 5 days. I wound up without meds for 5 days.

a reply to: AmmoniaMudhemp

That is a fantastic point and one that I failed to think of. Consistent environments and situations can be huge triggers for anxiety and discomfort - particularly for people who struggle with specific problems.

For those who can't directly relate - think of that feeling you had when you went to get your keys only to realize they aren't where you thought they were. It's like that, but more profound.

a reply to: Hefficide

Thanks Heff!

A great thread at just the right time.

I often use humor as my defensive mechanism (if you didn't know) but these times can be stressful.

You li'l angel you!

a reply to: Hefficide

That sounds a lot like you are human..

I can't see the light at the end of the tunnel anymore. Truth be known, I can't even find the tunnel.

a reply to: nugget1

When I was in Scouting I remember being told that if one got lost to pick a direction, start walking and don't deviate from that path. The reasoning being that sticking to a course prevents circling back.

I'm not sure if that applies here, but if I were in a dark place and couldn't get my bearings I think I'd probably sit for a minute, collect my thoughts, breathe a little, pick a point in the distance and then start moving.

Eventually a light will appear.

Hey Heff: I've encountered you before, and been happy to do so.
Thanks so much for your personal revelations, putting yourself out there and welcoming others to do so, too. I think this is very much needed right now.

And you are absolutely not alone in everything you've described about yourself. Maybe this is what builds compassion amongst us, which is highly needed right now.
regards and stay safe and thanks,
tetra50

a reply to: Hefficide

Thank you.
I have my bearings, and I know the destination. I'm just having a little trouble adjusting to the fact that this virus will most likely alter my ETA.

a reply to: nugget1

Ah. I think I see. If so I sincerely hope this situation doesn't have that effect and that you can stay lost in this tunnel with the rest of us for the duration.

If you don't feel at least a little out of sorts, a little uncertain, then you are really in denial. I am a calm and planning type, but to say I don't have apprehension about the near and long term future would be an untruth.
I try to find some silver lining in the situation.
For better or worse there will be more families at home together. I pray that they make it for the better.
I pray everyone on ATS weathers this fine and comes out stronger on the back side.
Peace.

a reply to: Hefficide

🍻 to your empathy in writing this, Heff.

I agree, we are nothing alone. The support from others, is paramount.

Thank you!

Good thread Heff.
Im worried about my dad. He is 93 and still independent. He still lives in my childhood home with his little dog. He is under senior citizen quarantine as requested by our governor. He is pretty healthy still, but Im worried that I will lose him if he gets sick. The best I can do is call him daily to check in.

I didn't know you were struggling like that Heff. You seem pretty balanced on ATS. I wish you strength. I wish you well.

a reply to: Hefficide

Hi Heff, good to join your thread.

On A GOOD NOTE:

If I can't get out and about I may actually have the perfect scenario to GIVE UP SMOKING if I can't get to the tobacconist.

Ain't gonna be easy, I've been smoking since I was....9 years old. Fk!

I have tobacco seeds but they aren't like magic beans and don't grow overnight.

Ultimately, my goal has been to give up tobacco and just enjoy one of mother natures best anxiety beaters.

Wish me luck while I climb the walls. May start a seperate thread to encourage others.

Stay safe people and keep your heads especially when all those around you lose theirs.

I LOVE YOU ALL.

originally posted by: nerbot
a reply to: Hefficide

Hi Heff, good to join your thread.

On A GOOD NOTE:

If I can't get out and about I may actually have the perfect scenario to GIVE UP SMOKING if I can't get to the tobacconist.

Ain't gonna be easy, I've been smoking since I was....9 years old. Fk!

I have tobacco seeds but they aren't like magic beans and don't grow overnight.

Ultimately, my goal has been to give up tobacco and just enjoy one of mother natures best anxiety beaters.

Wish me luck while I climb the walls. May start a seperate thread to encourage others.

Stay safe people and keep your heads especially when all those around you lose theirs.

I LOVE YOU ALL.

Thanks very much, Nerbot...and I really mean that.
Reading anyone loved us all made my friggn day, and I'm not being sarcastic.
Many more of us need to express that, I think. Much love to you and everyone else in these very difficult times.
tetra

a reply to: visitedbythem

In the subdivision I live in - middle class and probably on the lower side of that spectrum - folks are really looking out for each other. A collection was taken up several days ago, when this started to look like it was getting bad. Supplies ( food and sundries ) were purchased and stored. Flyers were printed off and posted to every door saying "Hi, we're your neighbors. If you need anything please don't hesitate to call".

I can't imagine that this is all that isolated and rare of an event and suspect that it's becoming exponentially more common with each passing hour.

I don't think any of us, including your dad, are nearly as alone as we might have been a week ago.

All the best to your and yours!

a reply to: Banquo
That's amazing! Toe tap to that guy!

Awesome thread.

I was on bedrest for 4 months when I was pregnant with my youngest. It was essentially like quarantine. I was separated from my family for two of the months because the only hospital for my condition was 25 miles away in the city. Then, when I got out, my kid stayed in for 7 more weeks.

I'm having some serious ptsd too. The thought of being cooped up again or separated again due to quarantine scares the bejeezus out of me. I know exactly how it feels. I don't want to go there again. Not to mention last time I had the best care, this time, there are no guarantees.

The lack if control, the uncertainty, the fear - it's overwhelming.

I've been doing breathing exercises and EFT just to stay calm and focused.

Love to all of you.

a reply to: nugget1

No doubt.

I think the world is suffering from a deep sense of unreality, even before CV19.