Is it Possible to be in Love Forever

originally posted by: elementalgrove
a reply to: EternalShadow

So do we TRULY get over loves and SINCERE connections? Or do we overwrite our disappointments and failures only to have pieces of ourselves linger in the ether to haunt us?

First off thank you for this wonderful thread and giving me a moment to stop and consider your question.

I do not think we are meant to get over our love and sincere connections. Our relationships are meant to teach us about love, in all its aspects, the good and the bad so to speak.

Ultimately we are meant to seek within ourselves what we so often seek outside, love. We have within us a source of unconditional love, I would even go so far as to say that it is our highest truth.

Our relationships reflect to us what we need to learn and I do not think there is a way to get over the impact they have had, for they are so important to our evolution. Your experience and the love you have is beautiful, a blessing along your path.

I think that through those connections we can integrate that love into our ordinary experience, if it can be met with non-attachment.

I really like that you asked this question, I have been focused on a similar scenario. Me and the woman I love would like to have a chance to be together but live very far away from each other, which I believe is stopping her from believing there is a chance.

What I have learned throughout my entire relationship with this woman is how important it is to love without attachment. Easier said than done lol!

Thank you for sharing!

.

You're completely welcome, and thank you for your input.

I, like you, and probably many of us, have dealt with distant relationships.

Personally, it rarely works out unless there is an insatiable need for that other person. I might be a bit in fairy land, but it does exist. I think it's a matter of being in a space where you can give a part of yourself you wouldn't give away no matter what.

She and I, gave that to each other, and at the point where she actually ended it, we cried together. We stood face to face, and no matter what was said, it was going end right there. God, it crushed us both.

I NEVER cried so hard in my life and haven't since.

Did we give in? Give up? Am not quite sure. But again, obviously, I'm stuck dreaming of only one woman.... for YEARS mind you,(having had other relationships to boot no less..) and coming to the conclusion that the possibility of us being together again is fairly bleek....disruptive really, and selfish..

I can honestly say that love is forever, and yet I will submit to love also being pliable.... it doesn't mean I must love only once, only that I love forever...and I hope we all do the same.

originally posted by: ketsuko
a reply to: EternalShadow

Just cause you dream about her doesn't mean she's the only one.

I'll tell you the truth. I end up dreaming about an ex more than my own husband, but it has nothing to do with me carrying a secret torch for him and everything to do with the ways he wrapped me up psychologically. He now represents dark things.

She may just be a manifestation of what you think you're missing more than a sign you actually are missing your one and only.

Wow! You summed up my thoughts better than I could, My heart was broken 35 years ago. She still is on my mind and occasional dreams (always at emotionally low times). Psychologically ... Yea! what she messed me up to this day.
BUT! the dreams are about love, reunion, reconciliation! I feel all good "lovey" in these dreams. NO!!

But. Back to reality! After this heartbreak I moved on, as hard as it initially was, I knew in my heart that she could never be trusted and never thought as special, As she was before.

Trust and honesty became the 2 most important aspects
Based on this...
I have been my wife since 1984 and still and forever love and respect her deeply.

Thank you for sending out this message.
It personally resonated with your thoughts

a reply to: fusiondoe

What you experienced was your spirits 'reconnecting'. She experienced it too.

There have been many 'babel's not just with language. What some call a 'shared consciousness' used to be the norm.

It's funny that everyone in the whore of Babylon believes there is no spirit, and everyone is a chemical soup formed by lightning.

You'll see her again, little brother.

originally posted by: WithWings
a reply to: fusiondoe

What you experienced was your spirits 'reconnecting'. She experienced it too.

There have been many 'babel's not just with language. What some call a 'shared consciousness' used to be the norm.

It's funny that everyone in the whore of Babylon believes there is no spirit, and everyone is a chemical soup formed by lightning.

You'll see her again, little brother.

This is my thread so I take full responsibility as to its direction as much as I can.

What you commented is TRULY derailing.

Love....

LOVE is what's needed...

To be engrossed in negativity will only make your direction a self fulfilling prophecy....


m.youtube.com...

Over 40 years and still the same
So , the answer is a resounding YES

originally posted by: EternalShadow


Do we ever really move on...I mean REALLY move on, or do we just compromise to move on...
:

What you have experienced is "good memories".

That's all.

The person you think you love is long gone. She is a different person now. But, you still hold in your mind the image you had when it was good for you two together.

You'll always love that memory of her.

The real present person, however, is another matter.

a reply to: EternalShadow

There is this one girl I'll love forever. Don't know why because a Lot and I mean a lot a lot of bad stuff happened..

But there she is in my heart.. not like in love, as I let her go, but if she were to come back I'd try again.

With her it's like I knew her before we met. Knew her before I was born or somethong.. Maybe genetics talking, but we met online so??

I hope she's happy whatever she's up to.. Truly.

As far as living happily ever after though?? That seems even harder to find.

I want that best friend, that partner in crime. That girl who really has my back even if my life gets scary again.

Back to the drawing board.

a reply to: EternalShadow

Yes. As painful as that was to admit in ones grief. It is possible to be in love with someone forever. But as rev said, it's back to the drawing board.

a reply to: EternalShadow

Sometimes, however, it would be naive to state that those lingering feelings don't compromise future relationships..

absolutely they do, in saying that, compromising how you really feel to save a relationship can be equally destructive.....

I hope you find what you are looking for.

a reply to: EternalShadow

For some of the men I've loved, I never stopped loving them. I am very sure I don't want to share a home with them, have sex with them, glad I didn't have children with them. But underneath all those very practical decisions, I still love them. I care about them, I see beauty in who they are and feel affectionate towards them.

For some though, I keep asking myself what the hell was going on in my head when I chose to be with them.
Last night I was asking myself exactly that about an ex (who I almost married long ago) who is a friend on Facebook. My god, he's a ten year old in the body of fifty year old. He sends me gifs of nude women dancing, or nude black men. Once in a while he gets drunk and wants to chat about the sex we used to have.
Last night I lost it and told him he has a serious friggin' problem. I have no idea why I was ever with him. I am sure his many ex wives wonder the same thing.

Something I learned through time, about the ones I continue to love, is not to let them know that. Men seem to have trouble differenciating love and all the other stuff. I used to end up with ex's feeling "teased" or strung along unfairly.

Always.

Forever.

And Ever.

a reply to: Bluesma

That's just... yuck. My sister went through that recently. The guy needs a fist to the head.

originally posted by: Bluesma
a reply to: EternalShadow


Something I learned through time, about the ones I continue to love, is not to let them know that. Men seem to have trouble differenciating love and all the other stuff. I used to end up with ex's feeling "teased" or strung along unfairly.

So true.

I think that's one of our biological differences.

If I heard that as in the past I'd be like " mmm there's still a chance "

"I care about you...." is probably a better translation to a guy from what you feel as love.

Lol, it's not a level playing field for any parties involved.

And to that other girl, maybe next life time?? Lol..
No really I stayed single for around 2 years until I felt it fair for a new relationship. Just so I wasn't looking back which would be unfair to who is now my newest ex lol.. she doesn't need two years. Had it's been 5 weeks? Over that one.

Can't figure out if I make girls insane or I just go after insane girls, so it's time for another break to look at my own shortcomings.

Still that one girl.
Next life boo.

a reply to: EternalShadow

I think we can.

But I think the measure of whether a person does fall in love forever, depends largely on whether they are together until they die or not.

Anything less than until death, has no meaning for me personally. So, although I have been in love before, it is the love which I will have in my heart when I am old and breathing my last breath, which will last for ever. By definition, any relationship which ends before death, is not eternal in its foundations.

Thats just my take on it.

a reply to: EternalShadow

I hope so...

a reply to: EternalShadow

No, because humans don't live forever. There is no way to even test this hypothesis. At most we can only love someone for 100 years or so.

originally posted by: Krazysh0t
a reply to: EternalShadow

No, because humans don't live forever. There is no way to even test this hypothesis. At most we can only love someone for 100 years or so.

Then your answer should be "maybe" because you can't say one way or another...

a reply to: AboveBoard

Ah! Touche. Can't argue with that.

originally posted by: Krazysh0t
a reply to: EternalShadow

No, because humans don't live forever. There is no way to even test this hypothesis. At most we can only love someone for 100 years or so.

So, you know what happens after bodily death, whether or not conscious and/or identity remain?

That's quite an implication.

a reply to: Justso

Thanks. That was so nice of you. It was a deep moment for me there.

You're welcome. I love deep moments of beautiful, sad reflection.